Erotica LA 2009: Tips for Fans
By My Buddy Powder from his site Life In The XXX Industry
NOTE: I post this for every AVN and Erotica LA. If you are a fan planning to attend a adult convention, then this is the blog entry for you.
With the Erotica LA convention coming up next weekend, I thought I’d take a moment to give some tips and suggestions to the fans about attending the convention when meeting their favorite porn star.
1. HYGIENE
a. Shower: Take one. Soap, water and shampoo is your friend.
b. Wear Deodorant: The number one complaint I heard from women in porn is the body odor that some fans have when they come to meet their favorite porn stars.
c. Shave your face: None of the girls enjoy having your sandpaper five o’clock shadow grinding against their face when you get a picture taken with them.
d: Cologne: The ladies enjoy a nice fragrance but don’t dump a bucket of it over yourself. A little goes a long way.
e: Brush your teeth: No one wants to smell your bad breath. Especially if you are a “close” talker.
2. ETIQUETTE
a. Patience: Wait your turn in line. No need to push, shove and to try to jam your camera in a porn star’s face, down their shirt or up their skirt. The ladies are there to meet and greet every one of the fans, not just you.
b. Don’t get grabby: When taking a picture with a porn star, keep your arms and hands around her waist. If she wants you to grab her breast or ass for a picture, let her put your hand there. Once the picture is taken, remove your hands.
c. No Loitering: The porn stars are there to meet their fans and may not have time to sit and chat with you. Walk up, say hello, get your picture, and move on.
d. Eye Contact: Women in porn do not have eyes on their chest or ass. Look them in the eyes when you talk to them. They will appreciate it.
e: No declarations of love: Don’t walk up to a porn star and ask them out on a date, tell them that you are madly in love with them or ask them to marry you. Security will be called.
f. Don’t pretend you don’t understand English: When a porn star tells you not to touch or doesn’t want you to stick your cell phone camera up the back of her dress, don’t suddenly look at her blankly like you don’t understand her. It just makes you look like an idiot.
3. OTHER
a. If you sweat a lot, drink a lot of water to keep yourself cool and keep a small stick of deodorant with you. You can pick up mini sized deodorant from a local Rite-Aid, Ralphs or Save-On for $2. Keep it in your pocket or bag.
b. Check your breath through out the day. Bring gum or mints with you. Again, No one wants to smell you had for breakfast, lunch or dinner. Last thing you want to do is make your favorite porn personality faint due to your onion and liver flavored breath.
This is a chance to meet your fantasy girl. Enjoy the opportunity and the convention. Hope these tips help and if anyone wishes to add to the list, feel free to leave a comment.
EROTICA LA 2009 INFO:
WHEN:
Friday – June 12, from 4 pm to 11 pm PT
Saturday – June 13, from 11 am to 11 pm PT
Sunday – June 14, from 11 am to 6 pm PT
WHERE:
The Los Angeles Convention Center
1201 South Figueroa Street, Los Angeles, CA 90015
COST:
$35 per person, per day or $75 for a three-day VIP pass available during presale only via Ticketweb. Tickets also include a $5 Erotica Chip redeemable at many of the booths at the show.
TICKETS:
Ticketweb.com or box office at convention center.
INFO:
Visit www.erotica-la.com
HIGHLIGHTS INCLUDE:
– Porn Star Q & A – Everything you’ve always wanted to know but were afraid to ask – Friday at 9:35 PM
– F.A.M.E. Awards – Saturday night at 9:00 PM
– Miss Erotica LA Pageant on Saturday night
– Adult star appearances every hour the floor is open.
wow, I thought this was a joke at first
A few true fanboys have no hygiene or etiquette because they don’t socialize much. Others can’t even spell ‘etiquette’. But God Bless them all and don’t ever charge them $5.00 for an autograph because that’s beyond insulting!
No Jeremy, I say fuck fanboys, they have to pay for the autograph. What else could they afford anyway, a honeymoon in Jamaica?
So dear fanboys, I know you feel emotionally attached to your favorite girls because you jerk off to her in your crumbling room all the time and you think because you’ve seen her naked, then you know her personally. I also understand the importance of $5 in your lives, paying it could have severe consequences for you such as starvation, walking long distances instead of taking the bus, etc. But let be clear: I don’t give a fuck about you, girls don’t give a fuck about you, either. So if you want the autograph, you pay. If you don’t want or can’t afford it, then piss off and go fuck yourselves. That’s one thing you’re good at.
No Colonel. Fanboys and the like are the devotees who provide this dying industry with much needed REVENUE. Of course, some are quite pathetic, have no shame, need to learn hygiene and to behave themselves, but whether you are a Porn Star or a Baseball Star, the notion that fans have to pay for an autograph (whether it’s one dollar, five dollars, or five hundred dollars) is utterly low, despicable, and an insult of the most immense proportions. It’s one thing, Colonel, for you to say incognito that fans are losers, but when a ball player or a ball layer charges fees for their John Hancocks they are being told DIRECTLY that they are a LOSER! They might as well write “To Loser” instead of the person’s name.
I was at the Glamorcon a few years ago and brought a copy of Dave Naz’s “Legs” photobook. He signed it, as well as a couple of other girls who are in his book who were there. None of them asked for money. I also met other hotties who gave me hugs, kisses, free calendars and photo books that I didn’t even ask for and signed them for free.
Then I came up to a girl who I will leave nameless and was in Naz’s book and she with a dead and indifferent expression on her face said that she won’t sign it unless I give her five dollars. At that point I lost any respect for that whore (which is what she is for charging money as an expression of appreciation to her fans). If a porn star wants to tack on something extra for a signed DVD or T-shirt, that’s one thing, but this is analogous to a porn whore who only fucks for money and shows no enthusiasm for getting plowed.
Jeremy Steele says:
‘Of course, some are quite pathetic, have no shame, need to learn hygiene and to behave themselves.’
As I mentioned before, these are the portion of porn consumers that I usually address as ‘fanboys’, obsessed fuck ups, scumbags and drags of society living in an imaginary world where they’re the king and their favorite porn girl is the queen. They’re not ordinary people and what they want is much more than a smile and appreciation. So when it comes to them, you must put your foot down and draw the line; and charging them for autographs is a way of drawing that line. Otherwise no girl is desperate for a fanboys pathetic $5, no matter how bad the adult industry is doing right now.
But when a delusional stalking loser is being charged for something as simple as an autograph, it’s an acknolodgement, a gesture of where his ‘relationship’ with his favorite porn girl starts and where it ends. The chances are he then wouldn’t dare to harass her, stalk her and ask her to go to a motel with him.
Jeremy, we both know obsessed porn fans are much different and potentially more dangerous than the fans of a musician or writer or football player. If Stephen King asks his fans for money to sign a copy of his new book for them, I’ll say shame on Mr. King, but if a porn girl does that, she’s merely drawing a line to avoid much unwanted harrassment and even danger. To each circumstance it’s own response.
No ties! No asking whether they have worked with Peter North or Ron Jeremy, even if you had to pick up Ron at the airport and drive him there. And if you volunteer to drive Ron anywhere, dont expect gas money. And if you have a “private” booked for the weekend dont mention it, unless you have been with the same girl before. Scam to avoid, and its a neat one, dont believe when they ask you to take a pic and say it will be on their website, an easy way to get another member.
Your arguments seem silly and tongue in cheek, Colonel, but let me respond. If a fan hypothetically is dangerous and has behavioral issues, charging $5.00 is not going to placate the nut and protect the whore (“whore” here is in reference to one who has the audacity to charge money for autographs). A hired bodyguard would be more effective and even necessary after a emotionally challenged fanboy is set off after being utterly insulted for being charged.
I was at a Peaches concert last nite, VIP section next to Carmen Electra. I got a picture of her and another was taken of us with her arms around me and amazingly she didn’t charge me, either!
Jeremy, I made my point in this argument and it doesn’t matter whether we agree or disagree. My main point is a line must be drawn to indicate the boundaries of an absessed fanboy/porn girl relationship.
I say charging them for anything from autograph to taking pictures, t-shirts, used buttplugs, etc. helps to draw and define that line and indicate it’s all business and nothing is personal; and I’ve seen it’s effect: ordinary fans pay the fee with a smile on their face and move on to the next booth and the next girl; while obsessed fanboys get disappointed and realize their personal relationship with their favorite girl was only their imagination. Hence, they put their tails between their legs and walk away with hurt feelings and a bit of anger and bitterness. But the important thing is they get lost, their hurt feelings doesn’t concern me at all.
You say hiring bodyguards for each and every porn girl is effective. I hope you know something like that will be highly costly in an already financially bleeding industry; and as long as you know how to handle obsessed fanboys it’s not even necessary.
Regardless, I’m entitled to my opinion and you’re to yours. The difference is I’ve seen my opinion works in reality and has results. Have you experimented yours? God bless you.