Crissy Moran

Crissy Moran leaves porn for God

Crissy Moran (born December 22, 1975, in San Diego, California) is an American erotic actress. Her ethnicity is English, Irish and Polynesian. She came from a small town outside of Jacksonville, Florida, and moved to Las Vegas, Nevada, and then to Los Angeles, California. In 1999, Moran started in the porn industry as a nude model. Her first nude pictures were published online. Her first hardcore photographs were published in 2000 on an adult internet website. She was featured in the 2001 Castrol Oil calendar and appeared in Lowrider magazine prior to her forays into web design. She subsequently opened her pay website, "Club Crissy." Originally, her pictures were mostly softcore in nature; as the years progressed, she expanded into hardcore heterosexual and lesbian pictorials, the use of sex toys and fetishism, including bondage.

S helley Lubben blogs 10/6/06:

A couple of months before Crissy contacted me, I found a link to a song called "Crissy M" and when I heard it, I prayed for the woman in the song. A couple of months later she contacts me and tells me that Jesus is leading her out of the sex industry. WOW! What an awesome God we serve!

Crissy Moran blogs:

My #1 interest right now is building my relationship with God and leaving my old life behind! God loves all of us no matter what we have done. I have worked in the adult industry for 6 years and he still has been calling out to me to bring me back home. Some of the greatest people in the bible have done things we cannot even imagine and God has used them in very powerful ways. Just know that it's not too late for any of us!

I could always sense men lusting after me even at a young age. I felt many of his friends looked at me with lust even though I was a little girl. When I would be alone with his friends they would make weird remarks about how pretty I was and it gave me the creeps. My dads buddies son was the 4th person to molest me. This is something I just dealt with because I saw the way the little boys father beat him and I was scared he would kill him. He always had bruises and was way knowlegable about sex and I could tell by the things he would do to me. I would fight him kicking and screaming and my little brother would always try to jump him when he could. I would feel so dirty but a couple of people had already molested me in my life. I was afraid also because my dad always said he would kill anyone who would touch me. Eventually they moved out. My dad had become an alcoholic. My mom still took us to church and we just began being with her more and my dad was left out of the equation. His thinking became irrational. My mom was fearful of him and so were my brother and I. He would go out to bars and come home with gun shots, broken knuckles, and with bruises and blood on him. He would say he was preaching the word and someone didn't like it. He started being very mean to my mom. One time he flipped over our dinner table because she cooked something in the microwave and he expected everything to be fresh and homemade. He started using his fists to break car windshields, our french doors, and anything else that was around when he would become enraged. He started giving us spankings more often but a lot of times my mom would intervene and say she would do it because she feared he was too angry and would hurt us. He still preached the word all the while.

One day close to Christmas my mom and dad had went to his work Christmas party. We stayed home alone and when they got home they were fighting. My brother and I were in our bedroom crying as we heard my parents arguing. My dad ripped my moms beautiful red satin dress off of her and I heard things being thrown in the other room. My dad was calling my mom a whore and telling her as she ran out the front door if she took us away from him he would kill her. Often when they would fight she would take me and my brother with her over to my grandmas house. She left us there this time. We were scared wondering what would happen next. My dad gave us both a trash bag and told us to pack up some of our things and throw the bags into the back of the truck. He then drove away with us to another city close to Orlando. We weren't allowed to call our mom for a few days. When we finally could we weren't allowed to tell her where we were.

Crissy Moran blogs Oct. 6:

I have been feeling very sad for girls who are in porn who are strung out on drugs, their souls are lost, and they are doing unimaginable things with whoever and waking up one day and wondering where their lives went or even worse ending up dead. I have been reading gossip forums for a couple of years and I also know some of these girls that porn is destroying.

I have been in porn for 6 years and I have witnessed first hand a gorgeous womans looks fade along with her soul. It really breaks my heart. A lot of you don't know what goes on behind the scenes. You guys know I didn't do a lot of what I am speaking of because I stuck to the softer side of porn (seems weird to say that).

The thing is even girls who do the softer side of porn sometimes lose themselves. Some become strippers and a lot of girls who do the softer stuff escort. Many of the girls have been victims of abuse sometime in their lifetime and are just looking for love and acceptance (like me).

My eyes were recently opened to the total destruction porn does. Not only does it hurt the girls in the business but it hurts you the consumer. Porn does not discriminate. Sex/porn addiction is preventing many people from finding true happiness in their lives. I know because I have spoken to so many of you through the years by email and message exchanges. Many of you spoke to me about your wives, your lonlieness, your dreams, and many of you looked to me for all the answers. I always tried to be careful when answering because I always realized that you are a person just like me who wants love and acceptance. I have gone through times when the guilt was so bad I just didn't answer at all hence my many hiatuses. This will be the last time I leave all of you hanging.

Many of you know that my boyfriend and I broke up a couple of months ago but don't know why. I will explain some of that at a later time. Let's just say the effects of the adult business took a hit on my personal life. I have decided that I want to be free from all of the guilt now. I am making great money doing what I do but the money is not making me happy. I have moved into my own place now for the first time all alone and have decided I want out of the business. I have so much more to offer to the world than my looks and body. These things will fade. I want to experience true real life happiness.

I know a lot of you will think I have lost my mind but I think that will only be the ones of you who never really knew me. I have decided to go back to my one true love who is Jesus. You may or may not believe in him and well I am not here to judge you. I am just here to share with you my story if you are willing to listen. My website is still up for now and I have yet to discuss these things with my webmasters. I am not sure what will happen in that respect. I am looking for legal counseling and any help I can get. It will be gone soon enough though. I will be posting here on my myspace page everything going on in my life until then. I ask you to forgive me for entering into your lives and stripping you from the more important things in life like finding true love, happiness, and your families.

I cruised over to Crissy's web site and read the Club Crissy free tour:

There's nothing like variety to spice things up, and that's exactly what I deliver, month in and month out. I update several times a month with brand, spanking new content, so there's always something fresh for your viewing pleasure.

I love the thought that you're out there stroking your big cock while looking at me, so don't wait another minute...

Celeb writes: "If by chance ms. moran's reference point - in this case the bible - were to be proven mostly fable - which i believe it is - then she has to take responsibility, blame and inherent shame for the choices she made - and live with or die with them. a god you never have to actually deal with - is the perfect god - as he will never judge or scold you. And that's all these "forgiven" girls have left - because down here on earth - she's marked and she should have thought about that before that first shoot."

Crissy Moran emails:

The tour for clubcrissy.com was not made by me nor written by me but by my webmaster. I do not speak that way and if anyone has ever seen an interview or worked with me you would know that.

As for Celeb's comment: I do take complete resposibility for my choices in life. I have come out in public and asked forgiveness of my fans. God has already forgiven me and forgotten!

CrissyMoran.com

Her webmaster posts:

Well as I am sure some of you are aware Crissy Moran has decided to leave the adult industry and take up an interest in Religion & Christianity. As shocking as this might be to all of you, we are and are just as equally shocked being we were the last people Crissy told.

So what does this mean for everyone with galleries, free sites and everything else out there promoting Crissy Moran? Well back in 2004 Crissy Moran signed a 5 year contract with Medium Pimpin (Net 227 Inc) entitling us to retain all rights to her Domain name CrissyMoran.com and all content new and old in conjunction with the site. So this is good news for everyone. Medium Pimpin will run the contract until it expires in 2009 leaving us with the rights to the site for just over 3 more years.

I am sure some of you wonder why you should still promote the site and its simple, nothing will change other then Crissy Moran is not involved at all. Her site has thousands of active members but we were lucky to see maybe 30 in her cam shows at a time. So with the departure of Crissy Moran all her personal stuff is now deleted such as her Surfer Forum, Daily Diary, and Cam Shows.

As stated we don't see this being an issue for anyones conversions, being research shows people we not all that interested in knowing her or talking with her they were more interested in her stunning smile and smashing good looks. Medium Pimpin still have more then 1 year worth of regular updates of photo and video updates, so conversions will remain strong as will rebills.

Crissy Moran's Testimony

She pours out her life story on this Nov 4, 2006 MySpace blog. She says she's been looking for love.

Most people are. They seek love/attention/meaning and will orient their lives towards that in the same way plants grow towards the sun. Aside from the money, attention is the primary reason girls do porn.

Crissy grew up in Jacksonville, Florida. Her first 11 years were relatively happy. Her home was peaceful and Christian. Her father was a pastor.

Crissy writes that she was first molested at age five by the father of friends.

Moran's dad began drinking. When drunk, he'd often rant about his daughter's virginity and how he would kill any man who took it.

She felt embarrassed. She felt men looking at her with lust. More guys molested her.

Crissy writes that to this day she is insecure about her looks and hates to be seen without her make-up.

Crissy's step-dad ridiculed her. She had bad posture and poor table manners.

"My dad kept calling me and asking me if I was still a virgin or if I had become a whore... Both boys and girls had molested me all my life and now I was starting to enjoy it."

At 18, Crissy had an abortion.

She graduated with her class in 1994.

She had several relationships that lasted longer than a year. For a little while, she was promiscuous. "I would have wild nights from time to time where I would drink a lot to get through the pain in my life. I would hurt myself to see if anyone would care and no one did."

Crissy yearned for a man to rescue her.

She got engaged at 21. She was sad when she found her fiance had porn stashed in his closet. Because she did not feel good enough for him, she got a breast job.

They broke up.

After another break-up, she started having panic attacks. She went on medication. It dulled her emotions. She was bored at work. She cruised the internet. She put up pictures of herself on a modeling site. She did a topless shoot. On day two, she went completely naked.

She got a boyfriend who managed her nude modeling career. He pushed her into having a threesome with another woman. Crissy hated that.

Moran got into a three and a half year relationship with a man she says repeatedly tried to kill her. "He controlled my modeling career, my emails, my phone calls, my friendships, my bank account, my life!"

She joined her boyfriend in doing cocaine, crystal meth, marijuana, and ecstasy.

It hurt her that her boyfriend used porn and chased women.

"The remaining time during my relationship was me trying to get away. I had fallen out of love but only felt sympathy for him. He was with me every minute of the day. If I was out of his sight got 5 minutes he would come check on me. One time I jumped out of the car after he threatened to kill me. I ran across lanes of traffic into a gas station crying and screaming for someone to call the police only to be looked at like I was crazy while my boyfriend carried me away."

"One day he tried to smother me with my pillow. After hours of arguing I ran out of the house and down the street to a neighbors house. They called the police and he went to jail. I tried to make plans to leave but his friends posted bail and he came home before I could leave."

This reminds me of the story Linda Lovelace told in her book Ordeal.

Crissy had more bad relationships. She was taken to the hospital for panic attacks. She tried to overdose on xanax. She tried to strangle herself. She cut her wrists but not deep enough to die.

She went to church but felt guilty and chose her nude modeling work over religion.

"I was friends with several girls whose lives changed while being in porn. I saw the looks fade with drug and alcohol use. I witnessed their spirits being broken. I saw the way the men in their lives treated them."

Crissy was now in the best relationship of her life, but her boyfriend kept nude pictures of his exes around the house and still went to strip clubs. This upset her.

She started thinking about the men who were cheating on their wives by looking at nude photos of her and sending her long erotically charged emails.

Moran decided in the summer of 2006 that she had to leave porn.

July 18, 2007

She writes on MySpace:

I left porn on October 6, 2006. I did not receive another dime from my website. I had a contract with a company to run my website and they refused to take it down. They have exploited the fact that I am now a Christian. I have seen website affiliates mock me and my change. I even saw a nude picture of myself with photoshopped pictures of Jesus' face covering my breasts. The old website continues to run because I cannot afford a lawyer. I get so upset every time I get an email from another Christian accusing me of profiting. I also worked for many companies who own the rights to my photos. You see in the porn business they make sure you sign a model release that says that once they pay you your modeling fee they own the photos. It's all a way to protect themselves in case the girls change their minds or in my case give their lives over to Christ.

I struggle daily with my past mistakes not because I feel condemned because I know there is no condemnation in Christ, but because I worry that my past will lead others down the wrong path. It causes me so much grief to think that other young women might see my past and be persuaded to get involved in porn or to think that my old images are fuel to someone addicted to porn.

Two months after leaving porn I went completely broke and lost my vehicle. I still had to pay rent and bills and God provided for me in this time. I took out my hair extensions and lost the fake nails. No more spa, no more gym membership, no more restaurants. It was hard to leave all the luxuries behind but I still continued in my pursuit of God. I began to attend church regularly twice a week, went on a retreat with my church, met with my pastor and my mentor. I went through much anxiety about not having any money. I broke out in hives over and over, got very little sleep, and gained a little weight. A spiritual war began as I suffered nightmares almost every night and had to learn to take control of it. Greater is the one who is within me than the one who is of this world! God used that time of anxiety to strengthen my dependence on him. Slowly my anxiety diminished more and more. I still deal with some but not nearly how I did months ago!

January 2, 2007, I began working in a law office as a receptionist and making just enough money to pay my bills. At the same time I was dealing with a lot of my issues from my past - past abortions, abuse, anger, and depression (which is why I haven't blogged much since then.) It has been quite the rollercoaster...