Luke Is Back




Monday, July 26, 2004

Email Luke Archives Photos Stars XXX-Communicated The Producers July 21

.XXX Not Dead, And AVNOnline is Helping to Pimp It

Mike South writes:

The key word here being pimp of course. Lets look at whose who in this battle: First you Have ICMRegistry and their little used car salesman Jason Hendales, Jason's job is to garner support for the .XXX domain for ICMRegistry so that they can try to ramrod it through ICANN. The proposed price tag for .XXX domains 75.00/yr.

Second, You have knowledgeable adult webmasters, attorneys and lobbyists like myself, Jeffrey Douglas, J.D. Obenberger and Bill Lyon who are against this, for reasons I will spell out in a bit.

Third. You have parties in the biz, who, out of ignorance or alterior motive or both would support this under the guise guessed it....keeping the children safe. These include LFP, Vivid, AVN and some of the board of the Free Speech Cabal. Though AVN has been passive in it's support, it's editorials speak for themselves.

Take the recent issue of AVNOnline where they lay out the story noting that the Free Speech Coalition held a special meeting to discuss and vote on this. AVN reported that the members in attendance voted it in BUT the big bad wolf (Then Director of the FSC) Bill Lyon vetoed the vote and called on the board of directors to decide the issue.

Now here is the FACT that changes the whole story that AVN conveniently left out. The night of the vote ICMRegistry brought in a bunch of "Ringers", they paid the dues for them to join the FSC so that they could vote in favor of .XXX, thus guaranteeing that the measure would pass. Bill Lyon saw through this ruse and did the right thing. They also conveniently left out the fact that the FSC had been BRIBED to pass the measure....reportedly to the tune of 8.00 per domain sold. That's a hefty chunk of change and was certainly enough to buy the votes of some of the FSC Board members with less integrity than Lyon. Lawrence Walters and Greg Picconelli were salivating at the idea too because passage is job security for them as you will soon see.

So when you come right down to it, it's all about the money. ICM Registry will make millions off of this and thus will go to great lengths to sell it, even if it means selling us out. Now some of you might be thinking that this aint such a bad idea, you are wrong, here's why: It doesn't "protect the children", kids dont get porn from responsible adult sites, they get it off of kazaa, bearshare, limewire, morpheus, IRC and others. It does "Zone" adult into a cyber ghetto, they say that we won't be required to use it but ask yourself this: Does your state have seatbelt laws? Remember how they sold that? They said Oh we won't just pull you over and give you a ticket for not wearing it, we just want to enact it to protect you and your children, now "Click It Or Ticket Campaigns are rampant right?

Just how long do you think it would take Ashcroft or smeone of similar narrow mindedness to pass legislation "protecting the children" by forcing adult sites to use .XXX. Picconelli and Walters say no way they can't do that but I guarantee you these two hot shots aren't going to represent you for free to prove it. For them .XXX is money in the bank, f-ck what's good for the industry. How long would it take your city or state to demand that ISPs "filter out" the .XXX domain or lose permission to provide service to you? Specially if you live in, say Utah? Starting to see the problems now? Ya I thought you might.

You see its all about the money, ICM Registry, Picconelli, Walters...these people could give a f-ck because they are going to make money, even if only because adult webmasters will buy the .XXX domains to protect them from cybersquatting, at least that's what they are counting on. Next time you hear AVN wanting to speak for the adult webmaster community, remember this people. You gonna be at Internext? Tell them to stop trying to sell you to the highest bidder.

Holly writes on GFY: ".xxx domains are the stupidest idea ever. It would take all of 5 minutes for ISPs to start blocking them. Those f-ckers at AOL would probably be the first, even though their idiot customers are some of the main ones out looking for it. I'm also convinced that the people who write for AVN are inbred, so none of this surprises me."

Mutt writes on GFY:

The most pathetic of that whole thing is some of Free Speech Coalition supports the .XXX. i expect it from AVN and VIVID - two pea brains in a pod u got there. but what i want to know is WHERE THE f-ck IS AVN, VIVID, FLYNT AND MOST CONSPICUOUSLY THE FREE SPEECH COALITION ON THE NEW 2257 RULES?

I'm not going to name names but big names in the adult video industry have no clue and no plans to do anything about this. No call to arms by AVN to rally the industry legalists to meet Ashhahahahaha head on. Just typical AVN Chicken Little sh-t. My shooter Marco called the Free Speech Coalition to see what they were thinking and doing about 2257 - didn't even get a call back from Bill Margold.

None of the girls in the industry have been made aware that their safety is being put in peril. for anybody involved in the porn biz to back the ghettoization of the online porn industry into an XXX domain is beyond belief - I guess these dullards have never read history and don't understand what happens to appeasers.

Ricardo_B writes:

Well the same sell outs that handed your asses over to Acacia did it again folks. How much more crap will you take before you drop em like a bad migraine and start suporting those that actualy do the right thing? Those so called industry leaders are bailing on ya for the almighty dollar's sake all the time. How many more times must they f-ck you over before you see this?

Taboo_Gal writes:

I see these points and understand the negativity. However, has anyone ever thought for just a second that .xxx domains may have a positive aspect? For instance, someone would actually have to type .xxx to access your content. Perhaps this could become an effective defense or protection against chargebacks. Has anyone talked to Visa to se if they would consider a reduction in processing fees or strictness in chargeback proceedings if an adult site was on a .xxx domain?

You could actually begin targetting the audience that you want; not 13 year olds who can't legally view or purchase your content anyway. Yeah, I know ISPs, SE's and Browsers can begin filtering out the domain. So, why not lobby for regulations that prohibit this act (based upon free speech or a specific regulation that keeps them from hindering your ability to do any industry or medium) and make it the choice of the end user to filter it out; i.e. Google Safe Search Mode.

Become involved and lobby for changes that will actually improve this industry without hindering legitimate business.

Gonzo writes:

Mike you of all people should know that AVN is part of the old school porn royalty. They would be happy if all this online sh-t would die,packup and go home. They think that then people would be paying hundreds of dollars for their videos and 27 bucks a magazine. I remember a couple of years at an adult dex show how one of them told me that the online world had stripmined the industry. Of course you know AVN stands for Adult VIDEO News. f-ck AVN... read Klixxx if you want to know whats really going on in the online industry.

Mike AI writes:

All .xxx would do is create a porn ghetto where the gov't could then easily take out. The big companies supporting it, at first glance seem to be the SAME companies who supported Acacia. These big companies are doing what they think is best for their interests, not the industries. The big dogs from the mainstream porn world want all of their online competition gone.

These large companies see affiliates as a temporary issue they need to deal with until they can seize the internet business like they control the DVD/Video market. Has there ever been ANY internet company cross over to DVD/Studio real world porn business? It does not happen because the old school porn people have it locked down. It is almost impossible to crack into their market, even if you have the adult experience coming from the net. The real money is in cable, direct TV, movie in hotels, etc.... These companies have a monopoly on this, and now they are coming after the net.

Kimmy Kim writes: "I'd be willing to wager that half the video people can't do more than check email even today, they're no threat to successful internet businesses."

Are You Bored With The Online Industry?

Quiet writes on GFY: "If you've been doing this for more than a few years, what do you think? I've been spending more and more time on things outside of online porn these days. I've also been working towards streamlining the role I play in my online biz, to leave more time for other things."

TeenGodfather writes: "Nope. Not bored yet. Frustrated and highly stressed out at times though."

Kitty writes:

yes. it's boring. if you're a guy at least you can jack off to "hit it pics" a few times a day for chicks it's just boring i do mostly mainstream these days , still do bits of adult coz let's face it 9 times out of 10 adult is leading the way - it's good to stay in front of the herd.

Fr8 writes:

One of two things seem to happen in this industry. You either get bored and want to move mainstream or you cant get off on your work like you use too. It has to be something new for me to even think about it. Push comes to shove pop in a movie with Auroa Snow.

Bruno writes:

I started researching the online porn biz when I was 6 months from turning 18. Its been almost 5 years working on it and I f-ckING LOVE IT! There are challenges everyday! Different projects to keep me and the crew motivated and excited. Thereīs constant growth in every aspect, from management to quality of life. I canīt complain at all, donīt see myself doing anything else and I can only say this is just the beginning! Dont get ībored. Get BUSY!

KRL writes:

After 20 years, its not really boring, but just not as challenging as it was in the beginning. Plus naked women all look the same to me which is kind of a bummer. Like you doing lots of mainstream online right now also. I like having new stuff going on all the time.

Brisk writes: "There's just so much easy money in this industry, it's hard to resist."

Improving The Quality Of My Writing

As the doctor put it: "You could stick Luke's head under a bus and run over it countless times and this still wouldn't lower the quality of Luke's writing."

Frank Thring Returns To Private

Frank Thring brings you a sumptuous serving of fetish in the 'Secret Delights of Baroness Kinky.' When three friends take a Scottish motoring holiday they dont expect to end up marooned in a creepy old dark house. And so the stage is set for kinky goings on with latex fantasies, orgies and sex-crazed women, not to mention a sinister manservant and the mysterious mistress of the mansion - the cruel and beautiful Baroness Kink (played by the incredible Zora Banx.) Shot in Edinburgh and against a backdrop of the Scottish lochs, this is pure fetish that will thrill and send chills down your spine. Six sizzling scenes and no shortage of tartan clad tarts to set the mood, and of course a full array of fetish accessories from gas masks to babies bottles, corsets, latex and dildos. Mr. Thring makes this latest Pirate Fetish Machine release a non-stop joyride of the very raunchiest kind.

We Need Some Politicians Like This Guy

James DiGiorgio writes:

According to the Times of India, a Croatian Member of Parliament was caught watching a streaming porn flick on his laptop while he was supposed to be participating in parliamentary debate on road safety. Two important questions immediately came to my mind when I read this report: First, Where is Croatia? And second, why is the Times of India reporting on Croatia?

Paul Fishbein Profile

Philadelphia magazine reporter Richard Rys is writing a profile on AVN's Paul Fishbein and anyone with something to say can email him at rrys at

Philadelphia magazine, incidentally, is the best city monthly in American and puts Los Angeles magazine to shame.

Is Luke an Emo Boy?

Chaim Amalek tells me of an article in The New York Observor (that's the same paper that published another anti-male rant, "Our Boy Toys Must be Goys, the Blonder the Better") that you can find here.

The authors describe a new type of male (what, metrosexuals are no longer new?) whom they dub "emo" boys.

He looks masculine enough, in a scruffy, tending-toward-boyish way. But he's vulnerable, emotional, subject to mood swings and fits of self-searching. He talks about his feelings. A lot. His fears and secret aspirations, his family pressures, his anxiety about whether he'll ever make partner, or get that book contract, or head that nonprofit organization-all are comfortable topics for emo boy. He'll sound sensitive. He is sensitive-but often more sensitive to his own emotions than to those of the woman sitting across from him at dinner. She may very well be sipping her pinot noir and wondering why her emo boy is droning on at such length about himself. Could it be that what she thought at first blush was sensitivity turns out to be good old-fashioned self-absorption?

Constance Wyndham, a 24-year-old art critic who lives in the East Village, also decried the role that women have played in creating the emo-boy type. 'All of this falls under the broad category of the collateral damage of feminism," she said. But she also detected another, sinister strain of influence: 'The emo archetype is actually a French man-ambiguously sexual, creative intellectual types, tortured poets, they might say, who are actually deeply misogynistic and harbor the most archaic notions of femininity or male-female interaction. They have a terrible penchant for public displays of affection, listening to Robbie Williams, but also for anal sex-which is more or less the only way men see they can dominate women fully and aggressively. On some level, though, these women understand that emo boy is caught in difficult situation. He knows it's time to grow up, but he worries that he is somehow not equipped to ever become a full-fledged adult man. Besides, don't women want men to relate more?

At one time or another, each of these things has been said about me. Could I be an emo boy? I say no. I am a man's man, if you know what I mean. What this article is really about isn't me ormen like me, its about the authors, and their inability to get a man interested in them no matter how hard they try. Truth of the matter is, most real men don't like ball-busting women such as the those who write articles like this one. These women are forever searching for fault in men, and of course they are never disappointed in their quest. The only hope that such spinsters have is that some man will take pity on them and impregnate them, but the men they are "attracted" to seem to be shooting blanks. Let us never forget what the great Jew Freud taught us: the solution to the problems of woman is motherhood.

Gary Kremen Happy

Gary Kremen, owner of, has been dating the same woman for eight months now -- Nicole Dumas (sister of Greg Dumas formerly of IGallery, now with Epassporte?). He's happy with the recent UK Channel 5 documentary on the saga: "It was good - they sure allow a lot of sex in the UK on television!"

Montana Gunn Interview

I've known Montana for about six years. We had a chat Monday morning.

Montana, speaking from her home town of Dallas: "I'm walking my doggies [each weigh under 20 pounds] right now.

"I was in LA about two weeks ago for five days. I did a scene for some jerk who bounced a $1500 check on me. His name is Paul St. Claire. His business is 3E Studios Inc, 22-32-98th St, East Elmhurst, New York, 11369. He also bounced a check on Dominic and Paul Coxx.

"Whoopsie. I just fell in a hole. Wonderful. It's rough out here in Dallas. There are holes all over the place.

"I moved back here last November. I couldn't handle it out in LA. It was making me go crazy again. I go back and forth to LA all the time. It's less expensive here and it keeps me mellow, out of the party scene. It's neutral grounds for me.

"Paul St. Claire said he was going in partners with Tabetha Yang. That she was getting rid of her modeling studio, which is probably a bunch of bull."

"Have you talked to Paul after your check bounced?"

"No. He hasn't returned my calls. I'm going to send it to the DA. He can ask [infamous porn director] what that is like. XXX bounced a check on me about five years and it cost him his contract with [prominent hardcore company]. XXX never made it up. I sent it over to the DA and I guess he went to jail for it."

Tuesday morning, July 27, Paul leaves me this message: "Yes, unfortunately, there was an issue with Montana Gunn and a check. She, Paul Coxx, and Dominic are getting paid. I've already contacted them. Dominic has already been paid. Montana's check was for $1,000. Paul's was for $300 and Dominic's was for $60."

Montana: "I'm looking at property out here to build a home."

"Are you going to build it yourself?"


"With a hammer and nails?"

"No, not like that. I'm not going to be pounding nails. I'm going to be designing it. I'm buying a half-acre of land. I want a stucco house and out here all they have are brick houses. I want it to be different. I want to do all my own decorating inside.

"In LA, I shot for Kevin Ducante. He shoots a lot for Peter North. He has his own company, shooting strap-on stuff of girls doing guys. He also does the line Pigtail Cuties. Cute girls who look good in pigtails.

"I was on Pamela Peaks' cooking show. I got to see my friends Racquel DeVine and John West. I went over to David Christopher's. He's like my best friend.

"I feel like I did more in my days in LA than I did in the year that I lived there."

"What don't you like about LA?"

"It's too expensive. The traffic. It's too crowded. I feel like I can't breathe. I can't get anything done to there. When I go to New York, I have massive jetlag. Here I'm centrally located. I'm feeling good. I look way younger when I'm over here because I'm not stressed out. I'm able to save money.

"You never saw my dog Bachelor? He's like the porn mascot."

"Did he do movies?"

"No, he used to hang out and watch.

"I'm going to some acting classes at this big acting school, Las Colinas.

"Hang on a minute, I got my dogs tangled up with other doggies."

Ten minutes later, when she's got everything untangled and is home, Montana phones back.

"That's a great way to meet people," I say, "to get all tangled up."

"Too bad I live in the gay ghetto," she replies.

We return to the subject of Paul St. Claire. "He brought up Kiki's [D'Aire] name. I called her. She said she'd never worked for him. She knew who he was. He claimed Friday and Sarah Jay were working with his new modeling agency.

"I'm going to New York to shoot for Black Mirror Productions (Joe Gallant) August 8-11. I love my mainstream stuff when I get it.

"I turned my car into a race car. I'm on the Porsche race team now. It's an expensive hobby. I've gotten up to 140mph on the track, but not around the corners. That's been fun when I can afford it.

"I've just finished filming for a VH1 special behind the scenes with porn stars. Risque was shooting a VH1 special with me, Kitten (ex-wife of Marc Davis), Monique (Alexander), Veronica (from Oregon) and some other girls.

"Risque did our lifestyles outside the business within a year. So much stuff has happened and I'm so glad that mine turned out the best. Kitten is going through all that stuff with her husband. They've got all the bits and pieces about that. They started filming as she was getting married to Marc.

"They started with me when I was in LA and dating Michael Raven's brother Thomas Priest. He used to do the art direction for Michael. We were together about seven months. He moved with me to Dallas and then I kicked him out. He wasn't working. He had so much responsibility. He had five kids. He had to send all this money back to them. And then he wasn't working. I couldn't take it anymore.

"Kitten, Nancy Vee and I went to the Super Bowl together. I told him that by the time I got back, I wanted him out.

"On the weekends, I'll shoot guns and stuff like that. They filmed me doing that and racing my car and burning pictures of Thomas Priest. They interviewed my father. He said, this is my daughter the gun. As long as I don't shove it in his face, he doesn't care. He just wants me to be happy. We're really happy."

I understand Thomas Priest lives in Texas and works in the car business.

INTERNEXT Las Vegas Moves To Mandalay Bay


LAS VEGAS - Show management announced today that it is moving its largest Internet-based show to the Mandalay Bay Resort & Casino in Las Vegas. The show is scheduled for January 4-6, 2005. The Internext Las Vegas show was previously held at the Sands Expo Center and Venetian Hotel.

Mandalay Bay, at the south end of the strip, is a $950 million dollar facility offering 3,222 luxurious rooms & suites, 16 restaurants with world renowned chefs, a 12,000-seat special events center, a 1,600-seat state-of-the-art theatre, the legendary House of Blues, a 135,000 square foot casino, an 11-acre tropical lagoon, a wave pool, the Lazy river ride, a 30,000 square foot spa and fitness center, a wedding chapel, upscale retail shopping, the shark reef, and most importantly, a full-service convention center that has over 1 million square feet of flexible exhibit and meeting space.

Linda Lovelace AIDS Rumor Debunked

I heard a wild story that Linda Lovelace had died of AIDS, not of a car accident as officially reported.

Well, the author of The Complete Linda Lovelace, Eric Danville, says the rumor is bogus. There's a police report on the car accident.

Punky Brewster: I grew up watching her cuteness, now look at her!

Pic Pic1 Pic2 Pic3 Pic4 Pic5

Biography for Soleil Moon Frye from

Soleil began acting at the age of 2, after seeing her father, veteran Virgil Frye, and brother, Meeno Peluce, on TV. After her father got Soleil her first agent, Herb Tannen & Associates in Hollywood, her career soon took off. Sondra Peluce, Soleil's mother, then began managing her career. At age 8, she became known world wide for the title role of Punky Brewster in the NBC series.

In 1992, Soleil underwent well-publicized breast reduction surgery to help ease back problems. The surgery reduced her measurement from a "D" cup to a 36-C.

Measurements: 38DD-26-35 (as a young teen actress), 36C-24-34 (after breast reduction surgery at age 15), (Source: Celebrity Sleuth magazine)

Spouse Jason Goldberg (25 October 1998 - present)

From another site:

Punky Brewster was my childhood crush You never met a guy who loved her so much I was only five years old but my heart skipped a beat When she didn't do what she was told I know it was stupid of me - the girl I loved was on TV Punky Brewster my heart is still true and I dream every day What every happened to you?

Punky Brewster has some big f-cking tits. Enough to breastfeed every Somalian kid What I wouldn't give to handle them once.

Breast reduction for chronic back stress. Took away your giant beautiful chest. I've moved on to someone new. The robot from Small Wonder has bigger breasts than you.

Yarmulkebra - Sweeping Porn Valley

What is a yarmulke?
A yarmulke is the skullcap worn by practicing Jewish men to show their reverence to God. Also known as a kipa.

What is a bra?
A bra is the breast-holding undergarment worn by women to stave off excess jigglage and saggage.

What is a Yarmulkebra?
A yarmulkebra is a bra made of two yarmulkes. No longer are yarmulkes limited to men or heads. You wanted to wear one? Now you can wear two.

Area Man Tired Of All The Porn He Owns

BREAUX BRIDGE, LA-Gil Peterson has grown tired of his current collection of sexually explicit videotapes, DVDs, and magazines, the 44-year-old delivery-truck driver said Monday. "I tried to rewatch Butt f-ck Sluts Go Nuts again, but it was so boring," Peterson said. "I mean, how many times can you watch the same set of twins double-team the black guy on the back of a motorcycle?" Peterson said he will have one more look at the tape, but can't promise he'll achieve orgasm.

Classic Connelly

Somebody tried to talk to Tim Connelly, editor and publisher of AVN. Tim said sure but wouldn't be nailed down on a time and place. Finally, an appointment was made for a bar. Tim shows up an hour late.

"Hey man," says Tim, fidgety and distracted. "Yeah man, I got to say hello to someone for a minute. I'll be right back." Tim leaves and never returns and never apologizes and never reschedules.

Making promises he can't keep. Writing checks that he can't cash, so to speak. Classic Tim Connelly. Sounds like the typical behavior of a guy who sees his connection, runs off to get what he needs and is successful in his endeavor. I've been hearing a lot of chatter lately from former AVN staffers about Conelly's not-so-well-hidden habits.

Obscene websites move offshore


CONTROLS on extreme pornography and other prohibited content on the internet have virtually ceased with just four sites ordered off the web last year. An investigation by The Daily Telegraph of the Federal Government's internet censorship system shows the watchdog, the Australian Broadcasting Authority, has lost the fight against obscene or dangerous web content. The major obstacle is that most of the offensive sites - containing child pornography, bestiality, sexual violence or even terrorism instruction - are coming from offshore locations outside Australia's jurisdiction.

I refuse to discuss the recreational use of Viagra with Big Media

Unless it is part of some broader topic, or at least made clear that I do not condone or participate in such conduct. Hence, what I thought would be a televised speed dating event has to be put on hold. Apologies to all who responded previously.

Lesbians disappoint me

Sometimes, as the Shabbos Queen departs with the setting of the sun on Saturday night, I feel an emptiness in my heart, a longing for that for which I must wait yet another week. And so, seeking to fill that emptiness, I typically study some of the holy books for guidance on such matters as life, death, wigs and electricity. But that seems not to suffice sometimes, so I head out for a night on the town.

Lately, I've been hitting a bunch of lesbian bars. Lesbian bars are safe for me, since I know that the women there will not try to lure me into conduct unbecoming a bachur like me. I can remain pure in such a setting. So why do I go to such places? I remain my father's son, so I go to those places to preach the Good News of the Seven Noahide Laws (none of which forbids lesbianism) to the goyim. as well as to educate the curious about the oral law. And yet I must admit that I often find myself disgusted with what one sees in such places.

Simply put, lesbians disappoint. They cut their hair too short, they sport key chains dangling from tool belts wrapped around floppy bellies, they don't know how to wear makeup, and they show a demeanor which is not appropriate for a young lady. Every time I approach one with a tract explaining the oral law, they respond with indifference or obscenities, especially when I couple this with some pro-Bush material. And there always seems to be a bunch of U-Haul trailers in the parking lot outside these clubs.

You lesbians would do better in life to limit your sexual congress with other women to the occasional trio with your husband, and you need a husband if you are to be happy in life. Come to regard your lesbianism as merely a phase that you are going through until you find the right man for you, learn to wear makeup, and you won't be so miserable.

Aussie Amber's Flourishing Career

Doc writes: Big Doggie has her ranked Number 5 on the National List.

Official Site



Film Career

British Documentary About Scandal

I've just watched a one-hour documentary about the Gary Kremen - Stephen Michael Cohen struggle over the domain name made by the British television production company called Making Time for UK's Channel 5 network.

A young Gary Kremen (rightful owner of with his parents Gary Kremen Luke Gary Jones, Orange County Sheriff's Department Sharon Boydston, an ex-wife of Cohen Kevin Blatt, Jonathan Silverstein Tom Hymes of AVN Online Luke Kremen Lawyer Jim Wagstaffe Ron Levi

There's enough Jews in the special to make a minyan: Stephen Michael Cohen, Gary Kremen, Luke, Kevin Blatt, Jonathan Silverstein, Ron Levi, Seth Warshavsky.

I remember producer Toby Dye and his cameraman stopping by my hovel December 10. I find Brits particularly charming and funny.

This tabloid is particularly tabloid and British in tone. Those wild and crazy Americans. About a third of the screen time is taken up by softcore footage of beautiful naked young women.

There's not much new ground that's broken here and there's one segment devoted to a reconstruction of a shoot-out in Mexico that probably never happened.

"I had the most valuable domain name on the Internet," says Gary at the beginning, sitting on the bed of a pickup truck next to a shack. "I should've made hundreds of millions of dollars. And this is what I ended up with."

He spreads his arms wide.

"It was impossible not to make money," says Tom Hymes about the early days of the porn Web (1996-97), "no matter how stupid and inept you were."

"It was a battle for a multi-million dollar business," intones the narrator, "that would end with a high-noon shootout in Mexico."

Baloney. This shootout never happened. It just makes for a dramatic climax.

Gary Kremen was born in 1960s Chicago to respectable middle-class Jewish parents. "His love was for the hard-drive, not the hardcore. In May 1994, he acquired (along with,,,,, the most valuable domain name on the Web."

"Cohen is a criminal genius," says Gary.

"Cohen's a con man, a crook," says Luke. "He's always been a crook. He'll probably always be a crook. It's breathtaking when you encounter someone who can lie with such audacity."

"He has the lying skills unique to conmen," says Gary Kremen's lawyer Jim Wagstaffe.

"He's a megalomaniac and a sociopath," says Kremen's PI.

"Never any guilt," says Sharon Boydston, one of Cohen's five ex-wives. They married in 1987.

In 1987, Cohen started up a swing club in north Orange County (called The Club) and a BBS (Bulletin Board Service, a precursor to the WWW) The French Connection.

"He started it in my daughter's bedroom," says Sharon. "He would sit there and type in different names and be different people. Always women. He was trying to attract men customers.

"When I was married to him, I asked him, why does everything you do have to do with sex? He said, because sex sells.

"I'm sitting at home wondering what could be taking this man's time so much. Finally I find out he's been swinging.

"He wanted to be Hugh Hefner. When the guys arrested him at his swing club, they had to laugh because he came out in his robe and his pipe and he was trying to be the Hugh Hefner of swinging. He just made them roar with laughter."

Cohen then moved on to new scams. He impersonated a lawyer in an elaborate loan fraud. He got four years in federal prison.

"While he was in prison," says Luke, "he thought, I'm going to figure out how I can avoid coming back here and how I can make a lot of money and be a big success and sleep with a lot of beautiful women. This is a guy who's devoted himself to banging babes."

"In the old days," says Kevin Blatt, "you had to go to jack shacks, where truck drivers and the guys with no teeth would pay five dollars for five minutes to whack off in a booth. Sometimes they would share a movie with some derelict. Now, with the advent of the Internet, you're sitting in the privacy of your own home with your pants around your ankles and there's nobody to say, hey, what are you doing? This is what's brilliant about the Internet. You turn off the lights. You turn on your computer. You pull your pants down. It's a great formula."

"It took three years in federal prison," says the narrator, "for Stephen Michael Cohen to hatch the greatest Internet scam of all time."

"I knew that when he when he went into federal prison," says Sharon, "God help us, because he was going to pick the minds of everybody there. If there was anybody he could learn something from, he would learn it."

Kieren McCarthy, journalist: "Just months after getting out of prison, Cohen managed to get his hands on the world's most valuable domain name. He was turning that into a multi-million pound business right under the nose of Gary Kremen, who did not even know it had been stolen."

Kremen lawyer Charles Carreon: "A friend called him up and said, I thought you owned You ought to check the Whois registration record, because it is registered to Sporting Houses."

Gary: "I'd never dealt with any criminals or confidence men. I didn't expect any bad play. I expected the company made a mistake."

To get, Stephen Michael Cohen wrote a letter from a third party to another third party, giving Networld Solutions permission to transfer the domain name to Cohen. There were over 20 typos in the letters. The word "Ads" was misspelled in the letterhead as "Ad's."

The letter says the reason Cohen is entitled to this name is that he has been using "" on his BBS since 1979. Cohen told me this several times. Problem -- the dot com nomenclature did not begin until 1984. Network Solutions should have known that.

A simple phone call to Gary Kremen would've revealed that letter as a phony.

"He [Cohen] was an IQ of a genius," says Sharon, "yet the insecurities of not being able to spell were profound for him."

But Cohen was a genius on the telephone, and that's how he persuaded Network Solutions to give him the domain name.

"Stephen Michael Cohen used as a banner farm," says Luke. "He just plastered it with banner ads for other hardcore porn paysites. He didn't have any pretense to doing anything but slutty dirty lowdown site that made tens of millions of dollars."

The documentary claims that Cohen had become one of the top three Internet porn kings along with Seth Warshavsky of and Ron Levi.

That is nonsense. Neither Cohen nor Warshavsky were ever in the top ten of the industry. Yishai Habari, Serge Birbrair, the folks running Crescent, John Bennett, Joseph Elkind, Richard and Robert Botto were all bigger players than Cohen or Warshavsky would ever be.

"Seth Warshavsky had so many scams," says Luke, "it was hard to keep track of them. Once he would get people's credit card numbers, good night. He'd charge those things up the yazoo. He'd claim to have live cam girl feeds when he was just looping old feeds."

It's funny to see Jonathan Silverstein and Kevin Blatt sitting together on a railing and Kevin looking around and scratching himself while Jonathan is talking. KB wears a white sweat suit and sunglasses and a fu manchu style beard and moustache. JStyles has a piercing in his eyebrow and an earring.

There's a bottle of Jack Daniels off camera. KB and JStyle started drinking halfway through the interview.

Cohen was charging $50,000 a month for each tiny banner ad. Cohen used his money to keep Kremen's lawyers at bay.

Gary: "Stephen Michael Cohen did not have many friends in the industry. You could count them on one hand. You could count his enemies on 50 hands."

Jonathan: "Cohen was a litigious prick. He was suing everybody who had 'sex' in their domain."

Kieren McCarthy, journalist: "In 1998, Seth Warshavsky and Ron Levi gave Gary $150,000 for his legal fight against Cohen."

I believe this number is wildly exaggereated. Warshavsky didn't give Gary anything. Ron gave him somewhere between $10,000 to $50,000 (according to various reports).

Jim Wagstaffe: "Stephen Cohen was beating Gary in the litigation game by using the very money he stole from Gary."

In July 2000, Cohen was forced to do a deposition.

"We had to cross a gulf in the law," says lawyer Charles Carreon. "At that time, there was no law about domain names."

"We had to convince the judge," says Wagstaffe, "that this was more than two guys fighting over an adult domain name."

Kieren: "To most people in the courtroom, it was just a sleazy affair between two sex-obsessed pornographers."

Cohen was forced to produce his bank records. He had his bank fax them to a kinkos where Kremen's lawyer were supposed to pick them up. But Gary impersonated one of Kremen's lawyers and took out the stuff he didn't want revealed. Unfortunately for Cohen, a Kinkos security camera captured him in the act.

"When we caught him on tape stealing evidence," says Gary, "the judge became livid."

In March 2001, Gary returned to San Francisco to launch his version of the Web site.

"Kim Wilde is our resident porn star," says Gary. "Every company in the industry should have a resident porn star."

Does that mean everyone in the company gets to f--- her?

"Gary's girlfriends and the women around him," says a Kremen employee, "he needs intellectuals around him."

Cut to pictures of Wilde getting nasty to Gary's approval. He spanks her.

"Gary views Stephen Cohen as a criminal mastermind. He respects Mr. Cohen, which I don't understand."

"I'm not into pornography," says Gary. "All I do is have a dictionary up there.

"When Cohen had, it was much more valuable than when I got it."

At Kremen's party, a guy puts his arm around Gary and says to the camera, "It's all about rock n' roll, call girls, and having a good time."

"I wouldn't go that far," says Gary, slipping out of his grasp and away from the camera.

"He's not in the adult online industry," says Silverstein, "in his mind. He believes he's in the search engine business."

Gary's PI: "Cohen has a narcissistic personality. He's a megalomaniac and a sociopath. He only cares about himself. He has a superiority complex. He thinks he's smarter than everyone else. I think he thinks he's untouchable and that will be his fatal flaw."

Gary: "He's defeated such people as five ex-wives, many gambling casinos, fraud, child support..."

Steve Banan Sends Out Joking Press Release About Ron Jeremy Getting Beheaded

Van Nuys, CA. July 22, 2004 -- Last evening on the set of David Sterling's new mainstream feature, "Witches Sabbath", shooting in and around Southern California, I witnessed a frightening sight, the beheading of Metro's biggest star Ron Jeremy.

Kurt Lockwood, Playwright

Hey everybody, I'm a huge Nirvana fan (as if you already couldn't tell by my name haha). Anyway, Kurt Cobain was a huge influence on my life. My interest in him proved to be a gateway into a lot of cool things like pro-women attitudes, liberal politics, not to mention some really awesome punk rock. When he killed himself, I imagine it must've been what it was like for the Baby Boomers to lose John Lennon. He was the voice of Generation X, my generation, and he's gone forever. So I wrote a play about him. It's a one man show told from the perspective of "Kurt" himself called "Ladies and Gentleman, Live From Purgatory, The Man Who Sold the World...KURT COBAIN!!!". The dialogue is made up of 95% actual KURT quotes from at least a hundred different interviews culled from about fifteen different sources. The set up is this: Kurt is in Purgatory for committing suicide. What is purgatory to the former rockstar? It's playing a "VH1 Storytellers" kind of thing where he talks about his life then plays his songs that pertain all culminating with his death by self-inflicted shotgun wound to the head. Anyway, heroin-abuse and suicide notwithstanding, I found a lot of inspiration in the life and work of Kurt Cobain. I hope you enjoy the play, it's rather too long I know, and there are plenty of grammatical errors I'm sure but as Kurt Cobain once said that captured the zeitgeist of Gen X "......oh well, whatever, nevermind."

Can GFY and the Adult Industry change outcome of the Presidential Election?

HomeVideos writes on GFY:

Just sitting here thinking that the majority of us in here would prefer Kerry win for obvious reasons. My question is with the amount of people we reach on a daily basis, couldn't we help educate the customers buying our products that voting to re-elect the current president would limit their ability to have the porn they are probably currently looking at.

I am surprised that with the power this industry has, we are not doing more to raise awareness of how difficult the current administrations is making it to provide the customer with what they want. I bet the majority of the surfers looking at our sites and buying our products have no idea what the current administration is doing to their ability to get our products..

Rob Spallone's Fat Dog Shoot

Cassandra Rob Spallone, Cassandra Ron Sullivan, Cassandra Ron, Cassandra Cassandra Ron, Cassandra Cassandra Cassandra Cassandra Trinity Post, Ron Trinity Post, Ron Trinity Post, Ron Trinity, Ron Trinity, Ron Cassandra Cassandra Cassandra Cassandra Cassandra Cassandra D. Wise, and his GF Trinity D. Wise, Trinity D. Wise, Trinity Kenny and the book the whole porn industry is talking about Kenny enthralled by a summer blockbuster Trinity Post, D. Wise, Cassandra gang gang gang girls Ron, Cassandra girls, hole in mattress Trinity Trinity girls Cassandra Bobby Bucxxx Bobby Bucxxx Bobby Bucxxx

I arrive at 11 a.m. Friday, July 23. Everybody's in the living room watching the movie Starsky & Hutch. There's no talent in site.

Near noon, Ben shows up with Bobby Bucxxx.

Bobby complains loudly that Jim South did not get her enough work so that she had to seek out another agent. When I walk over, she clams up. "You're the guy who writes everything on the Internet," she says.

Bobby says we've met before. She's hyper. She's drunk. She's English. She's a hot blonde with a killer body. I remember we met at World Modeling June 7.

The shoot's turning into a disaster. I ask Rob why he didn't book through World Modeling. He says Fat Dog arranged everything.

Black guy D. Wise is on his way with two white chicks. Rob scrambles to get other women. By 1 p.m., the shoot is gelling. Bill Diehl shoots stills. He shows me how to cleanse my lens.

We all watch an hour of Starsky until the talent arrive.

Cytherea breezes in and out.

Rob tells a slim girls who lives here that she's doing her first scene today. She walks off.

I hear derogatory talk about shyster Israelis in porn.

Bobby doesn't have an AIDS test. Rob says to send her home. Bobby says AIM has test. Kenny, the production manager, calls AIM. The test result has not come back yet.

A few minutes later, yes, it has come back. Bobby is negative.

Rob: "Print it all over the Internet. Exotic Modeling [is terrible]."

Bobby: "They're better than Jim South."

Rob: "Jim has been in business 28 years."

Cassandra, in a red bikini, has been in the industry for a week. Trinity Post, in a pink bikini, is the girlfriend of black talent and manager D. Wise (Global Management 2001).

He's been in porn since 1996. In 1998, he projected 2001 as the year he'd own property in California.

Rob's going to meet his brother Richie, and his four daughters, in Las Vegas next Wednesday.

D. Wise and Rob discuss journalistic ethics and how to deal with Duke Floored.

Rob: "You shoulda seen what he wrote about you last time. That you was this black pimp that wanted to be Jewish."

D. Wise: "I know he didn't write anything bad because he smiled when he saw me."

Rob: "He'll smile and stab you in the back."

D. Wise points out: "You have some kind of loyalty to this business. I could beat him up and put him in a coma and I wouldn't care."

Rob creates the storyline for the movie. "D. Wise will be the pimp. He'll bring the girls to see me and Kenny [production manager].

"Can we get a towel to clean off the table?"

Duke: "Get the black man to do it."

D. Wise doesn't like that. "There's going to be a white guy getting his ass kicked."

12:50 p.m. Bobby chats with her friend Max Hardcore over her cell phone. "I don't know if you're f---ed up or I'm f---ed up," she says. "I'm drunk."

Mike Albo writes:

Have you stopped taking your mood-altering medications? First you start writing all sorts of latently-some would say blatantly-gay-sounding drivel, then you start getting on your bizarre moral high-horse, and now you're taking guff from the talent. You really need a hobby. I suspect that you lack the coordination-and the patience-to master, say, the guitar, but maybe the hurdy-gurdy is just your speed. I believe even you could learn to turn a crank and push some keys. You could be just like Spencer Tracy in Captains Courageous. Perhaps you could even persuade D. Wise to be your Freddy Bartholomew. Here's a link to get you started.

Bunny Love

Hugh Hefner's "Little Black Book" tells his own heroic epic and shows us the world he has wrought.

by Matt Labash

His co-writer is Bill Zehme who has, in the past, proven himself a formidable talent, this year picking up a National Magazine Award for an impressive Esquire story he wrote on disgraced columnist Bob Greene. But as a longtime celebrity chronicler, Zehme has fellated more stars than most of the denizens of Hef's bunny hutch. Thus the Hefner/Zehme collaboration is a love story of sorts: Zehme's love for Hef, Hef's love for himself.

Bill Zehme, who possesses the trait any celebrity hagiographer needs in abundance--credulity. With pen, purple, and panties, damp, Zehme depicts Hefner in an annoying argot that is half fanzine, half overripe liner-notes from some moldy bebop album. At every turn, he polishes the legacy. Hefner, we learn on the first page, is less pervy old lecher, more silly girl. Like some dreamy, unicorn-drawing teenybopper, Hefner--indiscriminate mounter of thousands of women--it turns out, is in love with being in love. It says so right on the opening page: "The one he loved first did not love him back."

But if the prose is icky, it pales next to the man it intends to service. Despite Zehme's strenuous efforts to turn Hefner into something admirable, something approximating flesh-and-blood, the latter comes off as a 24-carat eccentric, completely unable to harness his own appetites. Hefner is a gentle lover, Zehme tells us, presumably not from personal experience, though one can't be sure with sentences like: "Feelings intensified, as they are wont to, and walls changed to portals, as his gentleness would impress each woman he ever knew." How Hefner had a chance to survey each woman, when he was pinned at the bottom of a Sealy Posturepedic dogpile, Zehme doesn't specify.

However, it is not so much the softer side of Hef we are struck by. It is the utter banality of his observations. Though the man has spent most of his existence getting an up-close look at gender relations, he offers nothing but a series of no-duh epiphanies. With his wealth of experience, one might think he'd say something insightful, even if by accident. But he doesn't, unless you weren't clued in to the following: "The female body is aroused in more than one place."

TV Viagra Update

I spoke to the TV producer this morning. When she wrote me about hearing that I had used Viagra "recreationally," she had a different understanding of the word than. I thought she referred to using Viagra outside of a committed marital relationship aimed at having kids. No, she meant people who pop the pill and then go to bars and parties. They just take it for fun, not for the purpose intended (a stiff prick). I found that too weird and I had to tell her I did not know anyone who did such a thing.

If you go to the Canadian border and they ask you what you do for work and you say porn?

Clickhappy writes on GFY: do they give you a hard time or is it no big deal to them?

SixthSense replies: you gotta slip'm a couple of FREE passwords 2 some sites man!

JFK writes: I would not say that if I were you ! Just tell them that you do programing , if they ask what you do. Dont volunteer info.

Flying Iguana writes: Tell them you're a gay porn star.

Luke's Viagra Situation

There has been talk about town that I use Viagra, which others have taken to mean that I must have some sexual problems relating to impotence. For the record, I am not impotent. I once tried Viagra back when it first came out because, well, everyone was trying it, and I wanted to see what all the tumult was all about. I was not impressed. It did not seem to have any effect on my erections, which sans drugs are so rigid that you could hammer a nail with my penis, and still use it to play drums for a long jazz session.

Which is not to say that I don't have any sexual problems, I have. One in particular, and it is pretty embarrassing for me to talk about it. But my psychiatrist at Kaiser Permanente insists that I be open about this, and so I shall. Simply put, I am too large a man for the average woman to accommodate. Sex with me, even when fully lubricated, is generally a painful experience for most women. It requires a suppleness and degree of pliability that most uptight women seem to lack. And then there is my tendency to really go to town on a woman's cervix. It isn't as though I am trying to cause her pain, it's just that that's what happens during the act of coitus for me; I hit the wall, and it hurts the person I hit.

What I need in life is a woman who is not shallow, but is deep and willing to expand her horizons. And I am convinced that such a woman needs me.

How Many Lovers Is Too Many?

I just finished the biography "Sam Spiegel."

Sam produced the movies The African Queen, On The Waterfront, The Bridge on the River Kwai and Lawrence of Arabia. I could not get enthused about the book because the lead character was so despicable (liar, cheat, manipulator, selfish, extreme womanizer (more than 80 women in your life is just wrong), lousy parent and friend).

I don't like to read (or watch movies or plays) about bad people unless they are terrific writers. Yet, I find my adrenalin running highest when I'm writing on bad behavior. I get the most excited when I capture the human condition as its most despicable.

I think that more than, say 80, women in your life is sleazy and just plain wrong. Where do you draw the line? I'm disciplining myself to have no more than 35 women over the rest of my life. That's the kind of sacrifice I will make for my religion. I do plan to be monogamous when I marry.

Is there an advantage to being a lady in this bizz?

Webgurl writes on JBM: "Hell yeah. I can't count the number of times i got freebies and special treatment for soooooo many things in this industry."

Jen writes: "I know there are those advantages, if all those advantages are based on baring it all to the world though, then thanks but I'll got with out the advantages."

Jonathan Silverstein writes: "4 words = YOU OWN THE PUSSY ... but the thing is - most men own the businesses. There are of course exceptions. My lady being one of them BTW - Freebies and special treatment are cool. I get them too. But mostly because I've helped spread around millions of dollars to the people I've done business with over the years."

Wired Guy writes: "Yes, there definitely is! Webmasters will come to you and wanna talk. Down side, is they often don't have many joins worth your time."

Fay Sharpe writes:

I was never thought of as content...(darn)

As I deal mostly with CEO's, owners & managers, I found that being a woman was a Disavantage. I never fit in with their activities to get to know them better - like a guy or a content girl can hang out with them at the parties & strip clubs. The fact that I was older than most - didn't help either.....

Back in '96 (in the CDROM/Video world) I asked one of the owners that I had gotten to know, if they had a problem with women being in charge? He said no - that many women had the purse strings behind the money - my problem was that I wasn't Italian or Jewish.....hahahahahahaha

It takes a long time and much perservance, for a woman to gain respect in this biz.... many would never admit it, but they have little respect for women in the business world, and some have little respect for women in general. Yeh, they give freebies easily - but respect is not easily earned.

Celebrity Sex Tape Skinny

Gene Ross reports for "Porn Valley- Kevin Blatt paid a return visit to Dee & The Fatmen,, Thursday night. Blatt is basically the in-the-know guy on the celebrity sex tape scene today and has been quoted often in the mainstream media, particularly with the Paris Hilton explosion."

Of Gerbils And Men

Cathy writes:

My National Review column today is on Snopes, the indispensable urban legends debunker site. I became interested in urban legends several years ago, when for a while it seemed like that terrible tale of Richard Gere and the gerbil was all anyone was talking about. Gerbils aren't actually in the habit of burrowing up the rectums of movie stars - or anyone else, for that matter; I mean, what's in it for the gerbil? - but just try explaining that to the dozens of people here in Hollywood who kept insisting that their sister's/cousin's/uncle's friend worked at some local hospital and - swear to God! - had seen the gerbil X-rays.

People became very heated if you questioned the truth of their story. But gerbils, an exotic desert species that would wreak havoc on California agriculture if they were to get loose and breed, have always been banned as pets here. I remembered this fact from my pet-obsessed childhood, when I checked out every animal book in the library. So where would Gere have found that gerbil? Presumably a hamster or mouse would have served just as well. Obviously the story originated in some cold-weather state where gerbils are legal and migrated to California. And indeed it did: I tracked down a 30-year-old version about Jim Nabors.

And why would a celebrity go to an emergency room with such an awkward problem instead of calling a private doctor? These stories reveal as much about the personal frames of reference of the tale-teller as they do about anything else. Folklorists found the story fascinating: Norine Dresser wrote an article called "The Case of the Missing Gerbil" for the academic journal Western Folklore, which cited a piece I wrote about the story at the time for the gay magazine The Advocate.

"In my favorite version [Gere] went to Kaiser," Dresser told me. "And I just had to scream at the vision of him pulling out his Kaiser card."

Speed Dating At The Hovel

A reporter at a network affiliate TV station in Los Angeles read something I wrote about my first-hand experience with the recreational use of viagra and wanted to interview me. As I have never been married, I fear that if I give such an interview, it would diminish moral standards in America. On the other hand, it could be funny as hell, increase my dating prospects, and help me peddle some books.

I'm arranging some speed dating at the hovel shortly. Drop me a line if you want to attend. I provide the food (kosher pizza, chips) and drink (kosher wine, Dr. Pepper) and you provide the company. If you are wondering what I require of you at this stage, it is only that you be single, emotionally available, and that you give me a chance to impress you with my learning. Oh yeah, I need to know if the possibility of there being a crew from a major cable network to videotape the whole thing for a special they are doing disturbs you any. (Not sure of that yet, but if you don't like the idea of being on TV, this might not be a good idea for you. )

I doubt that Bianca Biaggi infected Darren James

David Taylor writes on RAME:

I saw Split That Booty 2 today, and I learned that Mark Anthony was also in the scene with DJ, and Bianca. Now, of the two guys, Mark Anthony gives by far the more vigorous anal pounding and so if Bianca actually infected DJ, I would think that she would have also infected Mark Anthony.

I know that there are more variables involved, and it is not that simple, but Occam's Razor would imply that it was Bianca that infected DJ, but rather DJ that infected Bianca. And what more, in that very scene, Mark Anthony jokingly says to DJ that Bianca might be one of those transvestites, and DJ seemed to know what Mark was talking about.

So I think that DJ was more likely infected by a trannie, just like John Stagliano before him.

I never understood why everyone immediately accused Bianca, when most Copacabana working girls (that's where the talent comes from; I've personally met Lebara, Michele, Mayara, and Keite) are sticklers for cleanliness, safe sex, and getting themselves checked out.

It's kind of a shame that most of the girls are quite nice, pushed into doing something because of economic conditions, and the whole world seems to think that they are all depraved whores who would willingly infect someone else because they don't care. I'd scream racism if DJ weren't black :) so I'll just scream economic racism against a "third-world" country.

Radically Gay

From the page for my memoir on 1 person recommended Radically Gay: Gay Liberation in the Words of Its Founder instead of XXX-Communicated: A Rebel Without A Shul.

Mike South's First Two Sex Toys From Las Vegas Novelties

Mike South's Vibro Horny Goat Vibro Rattler

Mike reports:

I guess this makes me the undisputed king of hillbilly porners

My Sources Here In Toronto Showed Me an Ad for a JKP Porn Ball That was Supposed to happen here Last Weekend: But all the JKP girls flaked except Nikki Nova (Who isn't a JKP Girl)..JKP girls flaking...go figger

New Date for XRCO (Hell I didn't Even know the old date) anyway now its Aug 19th, 2004 presumeably at the same time and the same place.

Seth Warshavsky Behind Cameron Diaz Tape?

Gene Ross reports:

Porn Valley- A little birdie tells me that Seth Warshavsky the deposed Internet kingpin from Seattle and the brains behind the Pamela Anderson-Tommy Lee tape may also be the brains behind the Cameron Diaz one.

Paris Hilton tape guy Kevin Blatt who's been in the thick of the Diaz tape controversy is scheduled to be on Dee & The Fatmen tomorrow night on KSEX, to add his two cents.

The Best Deal Ever

Due to the sacrifices I've made to live an ethical life, I have no money for such apparently necessary activities as dating. (You'd be shocked if you knew what people were willing to pay me for what you'd be even more shocked to learn they wanted me to do or write about. I continue to turn them down, and will continue to do so no matter what.)

I subsist on a huge sack of bug-infested rice that I bought during happier day,s and the vegetables I manage to harvest from several well-situated dumpsters around town. That, and the free meals I snag by accompanying certain women to fancy shmancy events attended by (real estate) millionaires pretending to belong to the lower classes. I am the real deal, people, and I ain't slumming it!

Scott Fayner, Are Back!

Scott writes on

I'm getting old. Scratch that. I am old. Teagan, the young newbie pictured above and below and so forth, turned 19 this past weekend. When I found out she was born in 1985, I nearly fainted. Maybe it was because of other reasons, but I did almost hit the floor.

"1985!" I barked. "Van Halen had already split up when you were born! I was in f-cking high school while you came out of your mother all gooey and pristine! Damn. That's crazy!"

I've never thought of myself as old. I look, could pass for, with ease, a twenty year old college student, I know that. But I'm not. I'm in my 30s and prancing around with teenagers. I can't decide if it's a good thing or a bad thing. Whatever.

He has also posts tons of pix of hot chix including Teagan Presley.

What's Harder? Journalism on Jews or Gays?

A non-judgmental conversation with Wayne Hoffman, the managing editor of the Forward and a godless sodomite.

Gauge Interview

By Cindi Loftus, courtesy of Xcitement Magazine

Gauge is a complex person; so young, tiny and perfect on the outside, yet so strong, smart and funny on the inside. I've been friends with Gauge and her long time boyfriend Jason for a few years now, but I really got to know them when Gauge was here in Fort Lauderdale feature dancing. We wanted to do a photo shoot, but we also wanted to hang out together. So Gauge and Jason came over to my house for a day of eating, drinking, talking, laughing and picture taking. We had a blast! And yes it was my pool that Gauge got naked in. (Do you think I could sell the water?) And if the following sounds more like two friends talking then an interview, well that's because it is..

Xcitement: Hi there Gauge! Guess who?
Gauge: CINDI!!!
X: How have you been Sweetie? I've missed you.
G: I know. I've been good. I am going to the mall right now. I'm gonna be twenty-four next month so I got a personal trainer starting tomorrow. I gotta find the whole workout clothes and stuff.
X: Is the trainer coming to your house?
G: No. I go to the gym.
X: So you are going to be a twenty-four year OLD lady.
G: Yeah. Oh man. I am getting old.
X: What is the date of your birthday?
G: July 24th.
X: Ya know what? I saw you naked up close and personal in the bright Florida sunshine and I don't think you need a personal trainer.
G: Well I think I do because I had some chick on my KSEX show (, Gauge hosts Fridays at 5pm) and someone in the chat room said "God, Gauge looks so old next to her. I'm like oh my god! So after the show I started crying and was depressed for two days and then hired a personal trainer. So I can say f-ck you to everybody.
X: People just say sh-t like that to hurt your feelings. It's not true at all. People say stuff like that to make themselves feel better. You know it's all about jealousy. What is your trainer gonna train you to do? Beat up assholes that say bad things about you?
G: No (laughs) I am just going replace what fat I have with muscle. So I'm just gonna tone my body up.
X: Well there's nothing wrong with that. But I didn't see any fat on ya.
G: I don't care about losing weight. I don't want to be too super skinny or anorexic. I just want to be toned like Aria. She does body building stuff. I don't want to go that far. I just want to get toned.
X: So what is new in the world of Gauge?
G: Just been feature dancing and shooting custom videos for my fans. That's about it.
X: Nothing new with Metro?
G: Nope. We are going through litigation.
X: That sucks.
G: It does but it will be over with sooner or later.
X: Well your contract is almost over with them. Are you going to be making movies for another company?
G: I am making my own movies with my camera right now just for personal use.
X: Can't you go work for another movie company this month?
G: July. My contract is up at the end of June and I'll be able to shoot. My lawyer said I could shoot if I wanted to, but I'm not going to because of a lot of things that are happening in the industry. I might eventually sign with another company. But if I can I'll shoot my own stuff. I'm ready to make my own money, and keep all of it.
X: Are you looking for a contract from another company if the right one comes along?
G: I might take one. It doesn't hurt to look over contracts.
X: Is Vivid your first choice?
G: Vivid won't hire me because Vivid doesn't hire girls that have been under contract before, with the exception of Tera.
X: I didn't know that. There are a lot of other good companies out there. I'm sure you can get a contract if you want one. But if you open your own company isn't it hard to do your own distribution.
G: I don't know. I am motivated. Someone who really wants something will get it.
X: Are you going to direct the movies too?
G: Yeah definitely. I'm not gonna have anybody directing my stuff. I know what my fans like.
X: Will Jason be in your movies?
G: I don't know. I've been trying to talk him into it.
X: Has he ever done any?
G: Nope. I keep telling him we need a pee-pee debut. And he kinda freaks out.
X: Girls would really like him. He's cute and muscular and got all those tattoos. He would end up with his own fans.
G: He would.
X: Who would you like to have starring in your movies with you?
G: Aurora, but she is contracted. There are a lot of hot chicks. A lot of the girls are contracted though.
X: What about guys?
G: Who cares about the guys. (laughs) It's all about the chicks. But I guess any guy that can get the job done. Not for me though cause I am really picky. Really, I would let the girl chose whoever she wanted to work with. I'm not gonna make a girl work with somebody.
X: What was the worst experience you ever had when you got stuck working with someone you didn't want to.
G: I'll tell you what they did to make me not want to work with them. They were groping me in the makeup chair. They wanted to continue sex after the scene. I was like "Oh God you are f-cking nuts?"
X: Is it someone that we have heard of?
G: Oh yeah.
X: Tell me who it was.
G: You can't say if I tell you.
X: I won't print it.
G: It was *****. He's pretty freaky too. Just between me and you he wanted me to come back to his house and put stuff up his butt. I'm like why don't we bring a production company and at least I can make a percentage on it.
X: So you don't want me to put that in?
G: You can put it in there and if he says anything to me I'll say what do you think you are the only guy who likes things up his butt! I was talking about somebody different. I forgot all about your ass! Literally.
X: Do you know what a spinner is?
G: Yeah.
X: Cause that is what everybody calls you.
G: I know. Because I am real small and stuff so I can spin on a dime.
X: Have you ever done that in a movie?
G: Yeah, in a lot of them. I can't remember which ones.
X: I've never seen anyone do it. But I knew that you could. The first time I ever saw you was in an Extreme Associates movie. Do you remember which movie it was that you stood on your head?
G: Yeah it was " The Abyss."
X: I loved that movie. I still have it in my personal collection.
G: What other movies do you have in your personal collection?
X: Hmmm, Older ones I have are Slap Happy the whole series, In Days of Whore, Big Bottom Sadie, Vice Squad, No Man's Land Legends and Trannies Rock 6! Just kidding about the last one. But back to The Abyss. I love director Thomas Zupko, but I've heard he expects a lot from his actors.
G: That was the craziest set I've ever been on.
X: What happened there with Zupko?
G: Oh man I so went off on him. In the Abyss I was on set all day long. I was set to do a DP and I didn't want to eat and production ran behind so much because he kept re-doing and re-shooting all the scenes. So I was there for eight hours already and I 'm not shooting yet. So I was like f-ck it. So I ate. I had a burrito.
X: Oh geez Gauge, what a thing to eat.
G: So right after I finish eating they call me to do my scene. So I was doing a double blowjob and it f-cking punched my gagger out. It's like having a big ass thumb down your throat and I threw up.
X: Was it on camera?
G: Yeah it was right in the beginning of my scene.
X: A burrito is an awful thing to throw up.
G: Yeah definitely!
X: Poor baby!
G: And Zupko says I loved that. I loved that! Throw up again! I said well if I had to throw up I would. And he says "If you don't throw up right now, then your fired and everybody is off the set." The cameras are still rolling. So I say to the guys I am doing the scene with keep your ownselves hard dudes. And I run toward Zupko and I get up in his face and I say "You want me to puke on command? I don't think so. Why don't you fart on command Mother f-cker?" He says "Oh no I can't, I can't." I say "Well if you don't fart we're all leaving!" I think there is behind the scenes footage of that somewhere. It was pretty crazy.
X: You're pretty crazy! (laughs) So what's happening with your featuring? Any stalker fans or anything?
X: Well last night there was this stripper at the club who was talking about me saying " the porn star blah blah blah" and she kept being a jerk. Finally I turned around and said I'm getting tired of your f-cking heckling. You're just jealous because your fat ass is sitting back here not making any money out there. All you do is bitch. You are an idiot. X: How many people have you beat up recently?
G: (laughs) None.
X: How many people would you have liked to beat up recently?
G: Oh man, a lot.
(I can hear the shoe salesman talking to Gauge in the background)
X: So what size shoes are you getting?
G: Size 3 1/2 in youth, or size 5 in Women.
X: You've got little feet to go along with little you!
G: I forgot my socks in the car dammit. So I am trying on tennis shoes with no socks.
X: How is y our love life?
G: It's going really good. I think we were getting a little tired of each other there for a while. So we reassessed some things and took a little time apart.
X: Well you guys have been together for quite a while.
G: Yeah like three and a half years.
X: That's a long time for a porn relationship!
G: Yeah. I know.
X: I need some sex in this article. What is the wildest sex you've had lately?
G: We went out boating with a couple friends and we did have some hot sweaty sex in the back of our boat at Lake Havesu.
X: Could every one see what you are doing?
G: Well we were in a little cove.
X: Where were your friends?
G: Well they were in a different boat.
X: I went kayaking today. But I didn't have any sex.
G: I don't think you could have sex in a kayak.
X: I think I'd end up drowned if I tried to.
G: Yeah definitely and then the alligators would come and get you.
X: I'm always a little worried about them. I try not to think about it. Last time I went out I thought I saw an alligator, it was just a black garbage bag. But it still scared the sh-t out of me. Oh, thank you again for the palm tree. It's doing well. When are you coming back down here?
G: As soon as I can! Because I love it there!
X: Next time you come down I am going to take you Kayaking with me.
G: Cool! That would be fun! I'll be in shape by then!
X: Do you still think you are going to move here?
G: I don't know everything is still up in the air. I just go with the flow. I wait and see where the wind pushes me I guess.
X: Well call me next time you come down and I'll tell everyone to check out your

I saw Ashley Blue today on daytime television

Oly writes on AdultDVDTalk:

I heard a few months ago that she was going to appear on Judge Mathis, but I work during the day. I have been on vacation for the last few days and was flipping through the channels when i heard a voice that sounded familiar. And there she was suing her loser ex boy friend. She won her case and got some of her money back that she lent him. What a great surprise. She is just as beautiful clothed as she is naked. She is awesome. The guy was nuts for screwing it up with her. He seems like quite the flake. They both had different names though dont know if they are their real names or not but it was fun to see.

Asmodeous writes:

Oly, I know we're mainly talking about Ashley but what did you think about her ex-boyfriend's new squeeze with him during the court proceedings? My God, did you see how tiny she was? She looked like a 12 year old! Even Judge Mathis was shocked at just how young she looked when he asked her if she was also in porn. Looks like Ashley's ex not only likes them young but child-like as well. But anyway, I'm glad Ashley won her case and hopefully she got back some of the money she lent this guy.