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Tuesdays With Robbie
2002-12-03 15:20:22

I arrive at the home of Captain Bob, a Christian pastor turned pornographer, at 10AM. I find Rob Spallone and his assistant Gary, Dynamite's hubby, in the driveway with Sin Nye.

Rob: "I've got my son doing pushups and pullups. And he looks ripped."

Rob has lost 27 pounds and is down to 192 on his 5'8" frame. He says he feels weak if he goes below 180.

Rob: "I've been cracking it up, Luke. Me and Cherie."

Cherie is Rob's Jewish girlfriend. I met her 18 months ago after she first entered the industry and sheltered under Rob's protecting arms.

Luke: "How did you lose the weight Rob?"

Rob: "I don't eat junk anymore. No bread, no soda, no candy... I look like you now. We could be brothers. For the first time, I have to wear belts.

"Since the divorce, I've got to get the young girls. I've got to look good."

Rob's kidding. He's a happily married man with two loving sons.

Rob yells to Cherie: "How's my new car?"

Rob helped Cherie purchase her sports car.

Luke: "Did you make the dealer an offer he couldnt' confuse?"

Cherie: "I've got ambition. I'm crossing over."

Rob: "What does that mean? So do all the other girls?"

Cherie: "Half the girls in this business are idiots."

Rob: "You think you're going to crossover into mainstream?"

Cherie: "Not mainstream. To the other side of the camera."

Rob: "In porno? What do you think that's going to do for you? Do you think there's money making porno?"

Cherie: "It's more stable and more reputable. I don't want to do porno anymore. I'm tired of it. I want to put out my own line and get sh-t started."

Rob: "Who's going to sell it for you?"

Cherie: "I'm going to get some money together, make my own line, and try to find a distributor."

Rob: "That just can't happen. Those days are over."

Cherie: "It's worth it to me to try."

Luke: "She has a dream."

Cherie: "There's somebody I already talked to at one of the big companies who said to me, 'We'll give you a budget if you've got an idea. Put it together. Shoot it.'"

Rob: "They're not going to give you part of the movie, honey."

Cherie: "No, but I can make some money off of it shooting a line every month for them. And then I will save my money and get my own website done."

Rob: "How much money do you think they will let you make?"

Cherie: "I don't know. I haven't thought that far."

Rob: "You want me to tell you? The high figure is $2000."

Cherie: "The point is to make money to put together my own thing."

Rob: "You sometimes make $2000 a week. That's going to be $2000 every three months."

Cherie: "At the beginning, I will still be working in front of the camera, but eventually I want to be doing my own thing for the internet."

Rob: "The porno business is finished."

Cherie: "I need to make some money and save it so I can get this internet thing going."

Rob: "That's impossible for you, honey. You're a good spender."

Gary: "They all are."

Cherie: "You're just mad, Rob, that I'm going to take over."

The temperature is now moving out of the sixties into the seventies.

Rob bought a white 1985 Mercedes on Ebay for about $12000.

Rob: "Internet is the thing to do because these video distributors are all full of dick. But you are six years too late on the internet."

Cherie: "Some of these companies do really well, like Anabolic. They shoot the nasty stuff and they do great. I want to do an anal line. They have no chicks directing there."

Rob: "The bottom line is don't use your own money. Look at Jill Kelly. She's not using her money. Is her investor making any money? No. Is he spending money? Yes. He's not going to make that money back in the next 20 lifetimes. That's like buying a bar and putting a million dollars into it.

"You're taking a chance in a business that's finished. Years ago, this business had a lot of money.

"How many companies bounce checks today? A lot. Why? Because they're making money? No. We came here too late.

"Cherie, you're smart. You went to school. You said to me, Rob, I'm not going to stay in it long. How long ago was that?"

Luke: "Eighteen months."

Cherie: "I got addicted to the money."

Rob: "Ahh, and what did Rob tell you the first time he met you and you said you were a nurse and you were only going to do it for a little while to make some extra money. I said it's impossible to go from a job making $18 an hour to a porno thing making thousands of dollars. You made a lot more money in the beginning than you make now because you worked a lot more then because you were new. You're finished. You're not new anymore.

"I love her."

Luke: "I hope you are saying this with love."

Cherie: "I still make money. I turn down stuff left and right because I don't feel like driving. I no longer make $20,000 a month."

Rob: "You said you were going to go back to your $24 an hour job. And you never did."

Luke: "I wouldn't mind $24 an hour."

Gary: "That's a nice job."

Cherie: "For my lifestyle, that wasn't cutting it. I was working two jobs making $18 and $24 an hour. I wanted to get out of the San Fernando Valley and move to Westlake and get my hobby going with my horse. I wanted to get a new car."

Luke: "Marry a rich man."

Cherie: "I'm too independent for that."

Rob: "Suck a lot of dick. She wasn't going to do anal. Now she only wants to do anal and stay in the business until she's 60."

Cherie has the name of her dead mother tattooed on her lower back in Hebrew - Devorah.

Rob met asian Sin Nye at his office three months ago. Some guy was trying to scam her.

Sin: "I went to Metro and bought my videos for $8 each."

Rob: "I could've got them for you for less.

"She was working for me. She was on set on the telephone with one of the companies and some guy was scamming her about that stupid show in Hollywood Park, claiming there would be 10,000 fans. There weren't 300.

"She was on the phone to one of the video companies. They wanted to charge her $8 per tape. I told her to hang up the phone. I told her I'd get her tapes for $3. I took her around and got her tapes. I saw her at the show and she went home with all her tapes."

Gary: "We sold $200 worth of Dynamite tapes. The booth cost $150.

"Dynamite has signed a two year deal with Forbidden Fruit Adult Toys. She has three new glass dildos coming out with her likeness. They're talking about coming out with a set of 52 playing cards with hardcore shots of her."

I run into Ron Sullivan. He's a nice courteous man but he never recognizes me, even though we've met many times.

I meet the beautiful blonde Olivia Saint, nominated for Performer of the Year by AVN.

Rob: "She comes into my office. I'm with my brother. She asks if I want her to take her clothes off. I say no. I had to leave. I drove down the street. My brother called. The girl took all her clothes off."

Olivia started in porn in late 2001.

Olivia: "I started in internet work in my hometown of San Diego."

She speaks softly and gently. She's just finished her scene with Julian St. Jox.

Olivia: "I answered a newspaper ad in SD. Then one of the gentlemen confronted me with the porn aspect of it. I'm very sexual. I like to be in front of the camera. I've performed in mainstream stuff like theater. I like acting. I like features. I do mainstream stuff like Showtime and HBO. I was in the Autofocus movie [as a featured extra].

"I travel around the US but I don't want to leave the country for at least another year until the terrorism dies down. I was going to go to Bali [Indonesia]. Then that [terrorist bombing] happened. I guess I'm chicken."

Luke: "Have you had any horrible experiences in the industry?"

Olivia: "Oh yeah, but we just keep our mouth shut about those and go on. You think of the paychecks on those days."

Luke: "Have you worked with Max Hardcore?"

Olivia: "Never. I don't like him. He repulses me and he should be eliminated from the business. After what he said on CNN, he totally offended me. He said all of us girls in the industry were run-away crack whores... Just because he had a falling out with Catalina, doesn't mean we're all crack whores.

"To say this on national television. A lot of people don't appreciate our business. It gets better when people like Jenna Jameson, Janine, and other big players like Ron Jeremy soften people up. People like Max Hardcore make us out to be the most immoral people. I'm not like that.

"I have morals. I treat people the way I want to be treated. I believe in karma."

I meet Captain Bob for the first time. I interviewed him about seven years ago. A former Christian pastor, he's worked in porn the past dozen years. His daughter Red Velvet is a porn make-up artist.

I heard Captain Bob call up Dennis Prager's radio show. Captain says he also called talkshow host Larry Elder to deride Wilt Chamberlain's claim of sleeping with 10,000 women.

As Captain speaks, I quickly see how he was a former preacher.

Black male performer LT says: "I was in Baton Rouge, Louisiana. A friend of mine owns a video store. One of his best customers is the Grand Dragon of the Klu Klux Klan. And all he watches is black men f--king white women. The wickedest sh-- that somebody could do is what people are really into."

Luke: "Yeah, black women and white men doesn't do anything for me."

LT; "Whatever is more taboo is what people will do."

Cherie tells cameraman Ron Sullivan she doesn't want a facial. She's been breaking out with a lot of pimples of late and she doesn't need that shot of protein to the face.

Rob Spallone says he knew actor Robert Duvall in Brooklyn in the 1970s. They swam at the same pool together.

Damien Michaels called Rob Spallone last week from jail, hoping Rob would bail him out. Rob wouldn't because Damien already owes him $2800. Damien was next to Jack Hammer in the slammer.

Rob talks to attorney Ron Miller aka Don Hollywood: "Damien called me for bail money last week. He was crying that he needed the money at that minute because he was going back in front of the judge and if he didn't bail out, they were going to have other stuff come up on his record and he would be f-----. Sorry."

Ron Miller is down to 172 pounds.

Rob has bailed a few porners out of jail.

I talk to black performer LT, in his late thirties, who says the white girls should work with more black guys.

LT did his first scene three years ago with Sharon Mitchell and later did Marilyn Chambers: "Look at the brothers, Lex, Mr Marcus... I ain't as big as those guys yet because I live in Las Vegas and I don't work that much. When your fans see that, they take note. The fans are tired of the same dingy-assed white boys. The hottest thing selling right now is interracial. When you put a white girl with Lex or Marcus, it is going to boost her sales. James from Westcoast [Productions, which specializes in interracial] just made his first million last year because he shoots interracial. Anabolic makes money because of that interracial s--- that Sean Michaels started over there.

"You can't survive without shooting interracial. New Sensations is suffering. Why do you think Extreme has gone pfft? Jewel DeNyle, who's married to Luciano, didn't do interracial until she went to Westcoast.

"I don't understand these girls. If you're good, you can take that pipe. Taking Kyle Stone or some of these other [unprintable term], come on... Get some real dick man, so that people can see that you're good.

"I did an anal with Cherie. It was regular cowgirl anal. Sean [Michaels] had to stop the camera. 'That sh--'s looking too cool, bro. I want to jump in.' Nah, shoot the camera."

Gemini is a 20-year old tall black man. He says he fell into porn. "People all my life have been telling me to model. I saw World Modeling and started three months ago. I aspire to be a marine biologist. If you watch Jaws on a boat from [age] 3-9, and either you're going to be an underwater welder or a marine biologist."

Ron Sullivan wants to clear the crowd out of the kitchen so he can shoot the scene of Julian St. Jox and Sin Nye. "Everybody out except Luke and Bill Diehl [still photographer]. I need the media hype. I need all the coverage I can get."

Luke: "You're getting plaudits on RAME."

Ron: "I was touched."

Luke: "When I first interviewed you eight years ago, you said you wanted to do more writing on the business. You were writing short stories about the Daydreaming Dame based on Nikki Sin."

Ron has been happily married to a younger woman for five years.

Black male performer Silvio, in porn since 1989, worked in Bali, Indonesia for five years in the pawn business.

Dick Nasty is squiring three English girls around porno town.

Rob Spallone: "Did I tell you I hung out with Ginger Lynn the other night? Great girl. We talked for about an hour and a half. She's great. We're going to do something together, not porno. I was editing Sopornos 4 and she was shooting her last movie for VCA."

There's a discussion over who smokes the most weed - Lexington Steele (who appears perpetually stoned) or Byron Long.

LT to Rob: "You didn't see my acting part for VCA? Veronica Hart [VCA producer and director] likes me. She wanted to know when I was coming back."

Rob: "What can you act? You can f---. That's it. You don't act pal. This ain't acting. You think you're in Hollywood when you're in the LA Zoo in a cage acting like a gorilla."

LT talks about his features.

Rob: "That ain't acting. It's still a f--- movie."

Rob to new girl Vanessa MacKenzie: "Are you an actress?"

Vanessa: "I think so."

Rob: "No, you're not. You're a leg-spreading whore. Are you acting today or are you cock sucking today?"

Vanessa: "I plead the Fifth."

Vanessa has to serve five days community service.

Luke: "Does pornography count as community service?"

Rob: "No. It counts as being a whore, a slut and a garbage can."

Vanessa: "I love you Rob."

Luke: "Rob, what kind of character is Vanessa playing?"

Rob: "A vacuum cleaner or a plumber who's cleaning the black old rusty pipes."

Rob sends a black man up a tree.

One of Dick Nasty's English girls comes by to work - Donna Marie, from Nottingham, the land of Robin Hood, a couple hours drive north of London.

Ron Sullivan chats with Donna.

Ron: "In the eighties, we used to make everyone look 25. If they were 18, we'd put them in make-up and make them look 25. If they were 34, we'd put them in make-up and make them look 25."

Bike-riding Marty Ramano, male performer, is recovering from surgery to remove a giant cyst.

Gemini has a gift with rhyming slang.

Gemini: "Sin Nye is one of the sexiest females I've seen."

Rob: "You just said that about the other girl."

Gemini: "I did not. And if I did, I would wish that to be stricken from the record. Gemini does not lie. Gemini speaks the truth."

Rob: "What do you consider yourself?"

Gemini: "I consider myself an adult entertainer."

Rob: "A piece of meat."

Gemini, who wears a rag on his head so his hair doesn't go everywhere: "Yeah. A man whore. That's what my momma calls me and that's what I shall be, a man whore. Thank you. I have no problem with it because women have been doing this since time began."

Rob Spallone invites me to accompany him to the Wildlife Christmas Party December 15.

James Taranto writes: In San Francisco (Gore by 59.44%), strippers are on strike. "Wearing pink T-shirts that read 'Bad girls like good contracts,' dancers banged on pots Monday and chanted, 'Two, four, six, eight, pay me more to gyrate!' " CNN reports. Says 27-year-old Vivian, a dancer at the unionized Lusty Lady club: "We want respect."