Wednesday, September 22nd, 1999
Krash reporting for Luke F-rd Wire Services, Ltd.:
Dateline: Beverly Hills. September 12, 1999. Emmy night! Caught by Daily Variety’s photog: Three of the four “Sex and the City” gamines, their faces flash-frozen with expressions less evocative of a swank Tinseltown bash than of being goosed with a cold proctoscope.
“Sarah Jessica Parker has some sexy news for Kristin Davis and Kim Cattrall at HBO’s Emmy party on Sunday night at Spago BevHills,” snickered Daily Variety’s caption when the pic ran on September 14.
And what might this “sexy secret” have been? Two days after Variety ran its snarky repudiation of the Darren Star news blackout --orchestrated over a span of almost four years by “reporters” at the New York Daily News, Post and Observer-- Sex and the City flacks returned fire with a lavish take-out in Daily Variety, dated September 17 and headlined “Women Love ‘Sex’”, anchored by a full-page HBO ad and announcing that Darren Star’s enigmatically described “dramedy” [sic] had been awarded Women in Film’s “prestigious Lucy Award,” named for the late, great comedienne Lucille Ball, who has mercifully been spared having to see her name used to whitewash and creme-rinse a possible homicide.
“We are a womens’ show,” kvelled one castmember in the Daily Variety “report,” which took “Sex and its City” at its word with the premise that “this is the way women talk to one another.” Gushed actress Cynthia Nixon, “We’re showing that women sometimes use sex as path to get to something else....” ..like Darren Star’s hotel room? Like the Medical Examiner’s autopsy table? Apparently Women in Film have not yet heard the “sexy secret.”
Elusive, ever-quotable Darren Star himself made a rare appearance on Variety’s page to reminisce how, “I wanted to do a show that reflected the way people actually spoke.”
Illustrating these memories was a recent photo of the twisted sitcom’s producer, who appears to have taken on some poundage since the days when Vanity Fair, dated May 1995, described Star as “buff.”
It was in his later puff period, when Star was still riding high--too high, apparently--that he admitted to “Sex and the City” originator Candace Bushnell in Vogue, dated September 1996, “I’m an extremely jaded person.”
Just how jaded is no secret to readers of l-keford.com’s continuing investigation--but the socio-culturally insulated cast members of Darren Star’s Emmy-losing product would ultimately prove the most ironic victims of the informational overkill and underkill that misled public and media alike: They would not discover the truth about Star’s narcotics misadventure until zero hour...when their reaction to the “sexy secret” would be caught by Variety’s lens for all showbiz to see. Stay tuned for more necropolitan life...when Reckless Endangerment 90210 returns. Only at l-keford.com.
Mixie writes on RAME: The Melbourne Age reported on Wednesday that Kathryn Patterson, 36, director of the Classification Board and head of the Office of Film and Literature Classification has died from an undisclosed illness.
Patterson's appointment last year was initially reported as a victory for conservatism, but this impression was quickly dispelled by Patterson's comments and actions. Anti-porn crusader Brian Harradine was even moved to complain that he had been "dudded" as she refused to follow his agenda. He was particularly miffed that she used the term "sexually explicit material" instead of his preferred "pornography" ("filth" might have been even more preferable).
The vacancy in the job will be a headache for the government, headed by a Prime Minister whose own inclination is against permissiveness, and who heads a party split between libertarians and repressors, but in a nation where public opinion clearly supports the continued availability of X-rated videos. Fortunately, Harradine no longer holds the balance of power in the Senate, so his God-given right to decide what the rest of us can watch does not need to be a consideration.
Keisha in Sodomania Orgies
DStrongarm writes on RAME: Keisha has been my favorite since the mid 80's... That ass...WOW! Any way, yesterday I rented a new movie called Sodo Mania Orgies, just because I saw her name again... Hopping for a good facial... But DAMN! She finaly did it! A DP!!!!!! But there's more!!!!!! She was fisted...!!! Looked great... only one problem... Since it was a US tape they had blured ut the hand... DAMN! It was a long scene and several people where there with their hands, and she realy seemed to enjoy it... MY BURNING QUESTION IS... Cab I find this on a Europe release intact, without "missing" anything?
Dead Porn Stars
From RAME: The Rabbi Stiffkugel wishes no one dead, but proposes this as a face-saving way out for Ed Powers: Ed fakes suicide by pulling the old leave-the-car-ar-the-beach trick late one night after one of his bad radio shows. This increases the value of his work, like when a painter buys a piece of the farm. Ed gets a black wig and contacts, renames himself Arnold Markman or something, and produces more films. Since he collected the insurance, of course, he can't appear in the films, and since he can't appear in them, he also gets someone else to write the lines. Is this a perfect solution or what.? Now, what to do about Dick Nasty and some of the other paunchmeisters? The Rabbi Stiffkugel (Opherian@aol.com)
Voyager7: As to Dick Nasty, could someone put a well placed call to an INS agent. I mean if these guys were on the Conehead's ass so much, you'd think they'd really be after Mr. Nasty, with his fornicating ways and such.... but I digress.... back to Ed and the spending of his proceeds.
First he would prolly go clothes shopping with Luke F-rd, to give Luke the scoop on his death. Then......
Maybe with the proceeds he can put a new coat of paint on his motel-like room, buy some Pledge-Wax for the black lacquered furniture, get rid of the window air conditioning unit and put in central air. He can then buy pallets of cases of spray scotchguard for the ever-most-venerable-purple bedspread. No way would he ever want to wash or dry clean that thing, lest it fade. Just keep spraying scotchguard over the most venerable. Also, the scotchguard would work wonders on his black socks. No need to change them, just spray them!
With the scotchguard protecting the bedspread, we would be assured of it lasting at least a few more millinea. Just think if J.C. had scotchguard when he was helping out the whores and such, that shroud-of-turin toga-thingie of his would look immaculate. Also, as archaeologists in the future uncover Ed's room, I bet an image of his pasty ass and grease from his face will be "imaged" within the bedspread, ala J.C.
Now a serious question, recently in the peeps, I saw the twins Riley provided Ed from his ever cruising the malls, arranging talent for Ed. I noticed on the wall of the room, where the pair-bonding was occurring, that there is a picture, taken out of a magazine, kinda hung hap-hazardly in Ed-like fashion on the wall. Its of a woman in dark curly hair. Any significance to the picture, on the otherwise featureless wall. Do you think I pay too much attention when viewing?
Jasmine St. Clair at Columbia?
Connor O'Boyle writes: Luke: I spent 12 minutes of a very hectic day making a phonecall to a friend on the faculty of Columbia University's Graduate School of Journalism in New York City. I directed her to search the Columbia registrar's data base about a one Jasmine St. Claire, a notorious bottom feeding slit of indecipherable ethnicity who proudly boasts to being collectively defiled by scores of degenerates on a sound stage floor. St. Claire has asserted numerous times in the press to being a Columbia graduate.
She returned my phonecall early this evening. "Are you bored? We did a computerized search going back to 1970 and unfortunately didn't see a student of that name either having been enlisted or indeed having graduated. Nothing. My source ran the full name and then just St. Claire but it came up empty. There were a few Jasmine's however. Perhaps she's lying." St. Claire now claims to be enrolled at UCLA taking courses in Interior Design. I'd like help in exposing this probable fraud too. My intentions are neither nefarious nor steeped in retrubution I just endeavor that public personalities tell the truth as my instinct tells me she'll someday run for office? Perhaps your readers can assist.
Luke: Jasmine St. Clair is not her real name...
Jasmine St. Claire told GeneRoss.com: "This whole thing with Earl [Slate], I know you gotta do what you gotta do, but I don't like people using my name for their publicity. Earl basically caused himself all that work. He doesn't get hired because of his attitude, and doing the transsexual movie doesn't help very much; working with gonorrhea at one point doesn't help very much; being arrogant or drunk or a set doesn't help very much, either. I tried to help him get sober, and it's sad that he has a drinking problem. If you're going to right all this stuff, maybe that's something you might want to add. I just want to be kept out of this whole thing."
Luke talked Wednesday morning with Kianna Bradley.
Kianna: "Earl is very sober and is doing well and I think it is pretty s---ty how Jasmine uses a disease like that against somebody... Tell Kendra for me, congratulations on her contract... Did you used to date her?"
Luke: "Yeah..."
Kianna: "I told Earl that, I think they used to date... And he said, I don't know... I said, it looks that way from the little threeway thing he has going..."
Luke: "We had our time in the sun..."
Kianna: "She sounds like a really nice person... I emailed her..."
Luke: "She is, I like her."
Kianna: "I'm going to the Xtreme Wrestling Match Friday night, 9/24... I'm going to get in the ring and go, now what? And see what she says. I was a member of the Beverly Hills Knockouts for Michael J. Peters club in Florida. I was with Michael J. Peters for nine years.
"What is she going to say? And if she says anything, I'm going to say, is this fake? I thought Xtreme Wrestling was the real thing. Do you think I should do that?"
Luke: "I don't promote violence... I don't have an opinion..."
Kianna: "I like you... You've been nice to me... I have no complaints... People always talk about you... He's doing this just for his website... But I say, he's nice to me. You haven't said anything bad about me..."
Luke: "If Jasmine called me up and said 'Kianna is a C-U-N-T,' I would have to write it... But I don't have a personal agenda in any of this. I get along ok with Jasmine. I stand back and talk to people... At times I give advice."
Kianna: "I don't know what to do anymore, Luke... All I did at the beginning was ask her to leave us alone... And it turned into this big thing."
Luke: "If you genuinely wanted advice, my instinct is to tell you to step away from it..."
Kianna: "I can't sit here and let her talk about him like that. It hurts me because I can see that it hurts him... He loved her... Whether she loved him, I don't know... For her to bring up the alcohol, is f---ed up...because he's doing extremely well and going to his meetings... Our lawyer has said to not dog her anymore..."
Luke: "I'd follow the advice of your lawyer..."
His Holiness on DVDs
His Holiness Pope John Paul II writes on RAME: Would you rather own every DVD that Digital Playground has ever put out, or every DVD that Extreme has ever release? Oh wait...Extreme hasn't actually released any DVDs, has it?
The companies that Digital Playground licenses from are companies that otherwise would not be releasing their materials in DVD format. If it were not for Digital Playground (hereafter "DP"), their titles would simply not be be released--at least not for another year or two, if ever. Not only that, but DP is also fairly discriminating about what they put out. Unlike NuTech, there are far more hits than misses with their releases. Check the top 20 DVD lists and count how many DP DVDs are there. If it were not for DP, I doubt there would be a single All Good Video title on the market, and I suspect a lot of people would be unhappy with that.
In the future, I'm guessing that it will become more difficult for companies like DP to find titles to license, but I doubt this will become a serious issue for another year or two (when the switch from tape to DVD is much further underway)...By that time, DP should be able to buy their own studio (maybe AGV?), or produce their own material on their own. But right now, why should they film/tape their own material? They have the best of all possible worlds. There is a huge amount of great porn out there that is not being released to DVD. All they have to do is buy the DVD rights for a few nickels and start printing money. Why deal with petulant contract girls and directors when you don't have to? It's, uh, alllll gooood....
A few notes on other postings in this thread: A few companies are starting concurrent release of DVD with video. I can't reel any examples off the top of my head, but check the latest AVN. This is an encouraging trend, but only the very largest companies are there right now (surprise). Also, Vivid DVDs drive me crazy. "Bad Wives" was one of my favorite videos, mainly because of Tricia Devereaux's two scenes. Unfortunately, the DVD version almost totally cuts her anal scene! Arrgh...It's not like she's going to be doing any more of them...Furthermore, the Vivid multi-angle thing is a total joke. Even when they get it to work okay, it only lasts a couple minutes...The only company that's been able to use multi-angle in a way that's remotely interesting is Heatwave. Check out "Bed of Roses", "Leather World", and "Kelly the Co-Ed". Except for the last title, I wouldn't unconditionally recommend these DVDs, but the second angle on all three is very well done--perfectly timed, and easily switched to. Like getting to watch a totally different scene sometimes.
Finally, Basementchild is correct to speculate on the fate of older video material. I suspect that virtually none of pre-1997 adult titles will ever make it to DVD. For me, this means I'll never be able to see Kelly O'Dell or Phaedra in anything but increasing grainy and corrupted video format. This really annoys me. I hope the technology progresses quickly to the point where individual fans can cut their own DVDs (as with the Mini-Disc format) so that we might preserve our favorite stars in their best scenes...Oh, and truly last, not only is there a lack of female masturbation in DVD, try and find a decent gangbang DVD (defined as one without Annabelle, Houston, or, especially, Jasmine).
Phaedra was definitely my very favorite redhead, almost my very favorite star, period. And she was quite a redhead, albeit a dyed one. Still, she was very nice: pale, almost chalk white skin, bolts through her nips, wide, curvy hips, and a fine, plump ass that tended to get buttf---ed quite a bit. Watching her wince and groan while getting DP'd in "Nice f---in' Movie" is still a delight. Her best movie that I've seen is probably "Coed Cherry Poppers #1"...the other girls in that one were just about as hot. Unfortunately, she was only in about 20 tapes (check iafd for more titles) before she dropped out of sight. If anyone reading this knows what ever happened to her, please let me know...
Another very cute redhead was Ember Haze. Ember looked to be more of a natural redhead, but I'm not positive. She was incredibly tiny and thin, almost prepubescent (some found it disturbing). She's in quite a few tapes, but did only one or two anals, which I regret that I have never gotten around to seeing. At any rate, she was very enthusiastic about her work, but again, seems to have disappeared, and again, any info anyone might have is certainly welcome. Lately, it seems there has been a lack of decent redheads...Hopefully the talent scouts at the L.A Grayhound stations can rectify this situation....
Pax vobiscum, JP2
-- Adultery in your heart is committed not only when you look with concupiscence at a woman who is not your wife, but also if you look in the same manner at your wife. -- JP2
Lynne writes: Didn't Lucky Smith also manage Shayla LaVeaux at one point? [Yes]
I asked you a long time ago what you thought of Eden Rae. You said you "had no take." so I explored contacting her via internet and phone during early April Had her meet my partner, Con, who's a lot more savvy with people. He says he'd never met anyone who talked so fast who was not using "artificial enhancements." I don't really know how to say that appropriately. I asked her to deliver to me one commercial video tape that she had produced, or which had used her performers. She replied "Is that absolutely necessary?" I said, "Of course." I never heard back from her.
I think Cocksocket is a wonderful word. It sounds great! Perhaps she could meet Cockrocket and they could have little ?
When I have the David Hardman movie ready for viewing, I would like to ask you to send a copy to David Sturman. His people are probably not smart enough to watch it themselves, let alone pass it on.
Carrenter writes on Yahoo that Metro Global Media owes him money: "I sell Metro some stuff. (Not Porno) Over 90 days late and they won't call me back. I call and call and nothing. They have always been a bit late but pay when they issue a new PO and want new stuff. Not this time...bad sign."
NiceJewishGirl aka RealGirl writes on the He-She Gay Page about Matt Drudge: Ok in today's salon.com he says he's not gay and that he's never used cocaine. I know people say he's gay, people on this this board, but is there and dish/proof? I am curious. And I do find him attractive. Many on this board know I like controversial and hated journalists, well, specifically Another Controversial And Hated Journalist. But you know I LOVE DISH and these guys KNOW THE DISH, even if you don't like them. So again, anyone have any stories of him and another guy? I am curious, and just out of curiosity, why would Drudge lie if he is gay, it doesn't matter if he is even if he's a right winger because there are gay right wingers, even here on this board. So why wouldn't he say, yes I am, or even, I prefer to leave my private life out of it..or whatever.
Sweetie replies: RealGirl your taste in men are absolutely the worst. You have a real penchant for guys who are bordeline crazy and egos the size of small planets. Next you will be asking about Camille Paglia. Still, to each his/her own.
I've asked about Matt because the first time I ever saw him on television he seemed to have all the qualities of an out Gay man. There was an blind item by another lowlife gossip, Michael Musto, which Matt Drudge fit the description. Some on the datalounge said that they have seen Drudge cruising gay bars in New York, but like all gossip, you don't really know until you catch them.
Why Drudge would not out himself as gay? First, Drudge is a word guy. If the question was are you bisexual, he would probably answer "Yes" which may be the truth of the matter. Second, Drudge is insecure as hell about his longevity on television and in the spotlight. He has okay ratings, but he doesn't really deliver much in the way scoops anymore. The Monica thing was a story written by someone else that got linked by Lucianne Goldberg to Drudge. Drudge's only hope to stick in the scene is to become the place where dead/killed newstories can be revealed. Reporters don't seem to trust him yet. Being gay just weakens his credibility with the RightWing (so far his main sources of information) and with others. Also, he soliciting funds from conservatives to defend himself against a Lawsuit Filed by Sydney Blumethol. Shocking as this may seem, but some of these conservatives do not like homosexuals and are very suspicious of the homosexual agenda.
Finally, Drudge probably doesn't want the demands from the Homosexual community to do something responsible. Defending some of the things that he has written, the columbine homosexual killer story which has been discredited, and things he will write in the future would make his job even more difficult. Personally, I believe that Drudge will out himself or pull a Rush Limbaugh and get married to a woman who cannot speak to the press but that will give him heretosexual credibility.
Blue Lotus: In Hollywood, people are less constrained by convention and therefore feel fairly secure when they are acting on their, um, "less commonplace" sexual desires. A bisexual plummer in Poughkeepsie (sp?) may never do it with a man. Ever. But if the same man was an actor, he'd more likely do it as often as he wished. Capisce? Just wanted to add I'd always heard Gable and been strictly trade in his male to male encounters, and had done so to advance his career. The Haines bio, oft recommended here, claims Haines f---ed Gable in the ass, and Haines was in no position, pardon the expression, to do anything for Gable's career at that time.
Phantom porn star Cindee Plenum writes:
Luke F-rd writes the wind
In no web site truth is shown
Cindy Plenum only Bytes
Luke: Where is your website?
Cindy: The cold truth rains empty facts
Sans website she breaths
Apy: i wish i could write the kinds of headlines you do.Apy: Hirsch Loses Weekly Blowjob Apy: instead i get dull s--- like this... Luzdedos1: cool Apy: yeah but i don't get schtupping porn stars as a bonus. :)
Apy: seen your girlfriend kendra lately? Luzdedos1: talked to her tonight Apy: how's she doing? Luzdedos1: tanning Apy: goddamn, shannacam is a total waste of money Apy: all she does is sit on the couch watching tv and studying. not much of a sex life for this porn star
Luzdedos1: what do you think of NJG? Apy: she seems to have the same revulsion/fascination with porn as you Luzdedos1: is she interesting? i did a threeway with kendra and njg tonight Apy: sexual or phone? Luzdedos1: phone
Apy: she's a good conscience for you. just not the prettiest jewish girl i've seen Luzdedos1: but is she interesting? Apy: as long as she keeps challenging you. Use her wisely and sparingly on the site. people will get tired of her. You can put all of Kendra you want on the site though.
Algy: You have all of these bios, but you don't show the pictures of the people that you are outlining. That is STUPID! Personally, I know what John Seeman looks like, but other people don't have a CLUE. What were you thinking when you decided to do this? It's a great idea...people all over the Net are saying, "yes, I've heard about Jamie Gillis, but what did he look like?" Your site, I thought, might provide an answer. But you chose to put a cartoon, where a picture of the SUBJECT should be. Don't you think that I am right? Ralph/NYC