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Friday, May 18th, 2001

Jim Gunn Blows Off Goddess

beccafive: hey, luke, guess what? Jim Gunn refuses to do an interview with me. Ya wanna know one of his reasons why? "..., answering potentially loaded questions for a contributor to venues like MikeSouth.com & l-keford.com isn't something that I really want to get busy with." hmmm, i think he just took a slap at me.. I'm all confused now....hasn't Jim Gunn EVER posted to your page himself?

Your May Press Release, Bitch!

Nelson Ayala writes from Legend Video: As the international whoremaster, Kid Vegas has been all around the world. He has skateboarded down the pyramids of Egypt, milked goats atop of the Himalayas, and wrestled anaconda in the jungles of Brazil. But, when the Kid isn’t f---ing models on the beaches of Morocco or flying high in his private jet, he’s back home on the farm cultivating the land and fighting for the plight of the American family farmer. “Many Americans have lost their feeling of connection with the land,” says Kid Vegas. “I’m here to give voice to the American family farmer, bitch!” And, just in time. With nearly half of all farmers being over the age of 55 while just 8% are under the age of 35, the future of the American family farmer is extremely bleak. Kid Vegas tackles the issue head-on in his new politically-charged film, Old Kid Vegas Had a Farm. Some of the Kid’s discoveries in this hard-hitting expose will forever change the way you look at the agriculture industry. Fact: 88% of a farmer’s income is earned from off-the-farm services (i.e. porn). Fact: Since 1998, hog operations have declined by 72%. Fact: f--- Jim Gunn. On May 21st, find out why many are hailing Kid Vegas as the Cesar E. Chavez of the new millennium. Order your copy of Old Kid Vegas Had a Farm now! The future of the American family farmer is in your hands … bitch!

JM Productions is guilty. Guilty of STROKE-VALUE in the first degree. Exhibit A: The Violation of Kate Frost. Witness as motorist Kate Frost is arrested by power-mad police dykes out to violate her civil rights and pussy. Exhibit B: Watch as the long arm of the law is repeatedly thrust into Kate’s gaping asshole. Exhibit C: A surprise ending so shocking you will riot in the streets. The verdict is in. If you thought the Rodney King beating was a blast, you’ll love The Violation of Kate Frost. Available May 21st. Only from America’s most wanted pornographers, JM Productions. www.jerkoffzone.com.

Have you ever been balls-deep in some girl’s ass and wondered if you were getting the most from your anal experience? Well, that used to happen to me all the time. That’s when I discovered Brandon Iron’s All About Anal. Does your girl suffer from porn star anus? Is it too loose? Relax. A donkey-punch to the back of her head will tense her right up, giving you a tight hole to enjoy. Worried about those pesky and smelly accidents? Don’t worry any longer. Rub her nose in it and say, “bad whore.” These and more helpful tips are available in Brandon Iron’s All About Anal. Get the most from your anal experiences. Order Brandon Iron’s All About Anal today! Brandon Iron’s All About Anal hits streets July 16th.

This Memorial Day weekend, do not miss the movie Gene Siskel would have called “moving” and “inspiring” had he not croaked from brain cancer, Jerome Tanner’s Nymph Fever #5. Written by nelson X, and based on the shocking true story the government doesn’t want you to know, Nymph Fever #5 is a story of human triumph, the search for truth, and hardcore anal sex. Playing the role of the slutty whore, the very sexy Nikita Denise delivers the performance of her career. With no dialogue to fall back upon, Nikita had to capture the angst and frustration of her character with body language alone, much like Tom Hanks in Cast Away. Nymph Fever #5 is available now!

If you’re the kind of person who likes their Wheaties with a little goat’s blood in the morning, you are in for a treat! Briana Banks and AVN’s f---hole of the Year, Jewel De’Nyle , star in Legend Video’s Devil Girl, the heart-warming coming-of-age tale about a young devil worshipping whore trying to find love in today’s hip, young, single scene. Devil Girl is available on May 21st.

Who's Adrian Gold?

Makeup artist Tyson Fontaine says about Legend director Adrian Gold: His wife Lauren Hays would book the talent and she'd usually try to talk them down to the lowest rates. They'd pay me $200 a day.

In Lips Wide Shut, Lauren kisses Teri Weigel in the scene. Lauren plays the butterfly girl getting the lube for the sex. She fluttered around and rubbed her hand across the girl's thigh and then take off again and run around naked.

They'd say they tried to train Wayne to shoot in Adrian's style but that he just couldn't get it. Yet they happily used all of Wayne's footage. I remember being on set while Adrian was editing and Wayne and Rick were shooting the movie.

Luke says: Tyson played me an angry phone message from Adrian Gold to Tyson:

"So call the IRS. I have advice for you. I don't have time to be dicking around with this s--- just because you're an asshole. Next time you see, run."

Next I talked to Tony, a former producer and assistant to Adrian Gold and his wife Lauren Hays.

Tony says: Wayne, Tyson and I were friends. And it just seems that every time Adrian and Lauren get someone new in their life, they give them an opportunity. And that's how you look at it initially. Then as things get going, you get taken advantage of. And it went from there.

Adrian Gold always give you his word. And if you question his word, he'll go off on you. 'We're friends. I've done this and that for you and you're questioning my integrity.' Then he'll turn around a week later and screw you over on his word. Then he'll come up with excuses. It hurt me financially for four months because I put so much time and effort into their company. I was a freelancer for them, in a sense.

I met Adrian a year and a half ago at a party. Once he knew that I didn't have a problem with the adult business, he offered me some work. And I helped him get more work. And the thanks I got for it was, 'Well, things aren't working out. We've got to let you go.' It shouldn't have been that way.

I think he's a talented director. I helped pitch his projects and get him contracts...

I was his production manager. And one day I had to sit him down and tell him why things weren't working. And he replied, 'You originally didn't want to go into production. You were just my salesman. So why don't you just stay in sales and we'll let this go?' I said 'Fine.'

I just thought that for the first time in my life I was being very honest and professional in saying that I didn't like the working conditions. He agreed with me. We actually hugged and said everything was going to be better and then I got a phone call saying, 'We're going to let you go.'

I hear they're doing well financially so I don't know why they couldn't keep me around. I guess they found somebody they could pay less money to. That's what they do. Every year or two, they find someone who will work cheaper and hire them. Then they f--- them over and hire someone who will work cheaper.

I put so much time into pushing him that I ignored other job opportunities. Because I believed in him. But once you start living that lifestyle in the adult business... As long as you have a good head on your shoulders, it is a fantastic business. Maybe I was spoiled... I had the money coming in on a regular basis, then I had to find something new to do. Was I going to get a regular job or was I going to remain with the connections I had, and start over and build my own [porn production] company? And that's what I've done. I've taken my $15,000 in savings and bought equipment for Newton Productions. We have three productions going right now.

I thank him for teaching me enough to get where I am at...

How To Approach Your Fantasy Date With A Porn Star

JustEd writes on BigDoggie: >She is my fantasy girl in every way and I cannot wait. >That body....oh man!

Then you should have a very good time. I think one of the most important ingredients to having a great experience is going in there full of desire. I mean if you save up your money to go on a vacation you usually pick someplace that you really want to go. Unless you have unlimited money, you should treat these experiences the same and chose ladies that you really want to be with (which is almost stating the obvious).

In one case I chose a starlet who I had been lusting after since the mid 1980s and fulfilled a longtime fantasy, in another case I checked out some pics of a starlet I had never heard of, both on the ASF site and elsewhere on the internet, then woke up one day when she was visiting my town and decided that I wanted badly to party with her (this wthout having seen her in any films) and called Adult Star Fantasy and they made it happen, because luckily for me, she wasn't that well known in these circles at the time and had some openings.

That lady was Ryan Conner and you can't imagine the awesome time I had. So sometimes it does pay to take a chance based on your gut feeling.

Insights Into Playboy

Gregg writes: While Alisha Klass' statements about Playboy TV incorporating adult talent to host their shows is factually correct, I suspect it's more out of their own convenience than out of any respect or appreciation. In other words, adult talent is willing to work cheap compared to mainstream talent. At the end of the day, it's easier for Alisha to make $1,000 hosting her show for 30 minutes than to spend five hours getting the ol' anal log slam. Mainstream talent simply isn't as likely to show skin and be sexual for that kind of money, while adult talent is more than willing. It's not like Alisha's there because of her interviewing prowess.

Christie Hefner reigns supreme at the top of the Playboy ladder, and she detests adult talent. There's no question as to the validity of this. She has never supported the majority of shows on her networks and views them, at best, as necessary evils. Night Calls is the top rated show and their flagship program. Those "two girls on the couch" are the essence of Playboy TV, create loyal viewership like nothing else on the Playboy TV schedule, and Christie tries every six months to cancel it. You call that support Alisha? Trust me, you're in her sights too.

Let's not forget that it was less than a year ago that Christie's mandate was to soften the network, and get the porn talent off Playboy TV because "they had forever tarnished the Playboy brand." Virtually every show on the network was cancelled (with the lone exception of Night Calls ironically enough) or was destined for a major reworking. Granted, she quickly realized this strategy wasn't going to work, and in the end Playboy is going more porno than ever (is there a better indication than Alisha's show replacing their short lived "VIP Room" series?). Ultimately most of the cancelled shows were revived when Jim English returned to the helm, relieving Richard Rosetti of his brief tenure running the network.

Unlike anybody else at the company, English has long known what the viewers want to see (although I'm not convinced they really want to see Sex Court) and that's increasingly explicit content. To compete with Vivid and The Hot Network (and really to correct for the lethal mistake of selling Vivid The Hot Network when Playboy bought Spice Networks) Playboy is now forced to play catch-up by upping the sexual ante on PBTV and the new trio of Spice networks set to launch next year.

At the end of the day porn talent hosting shows are good for business, and that's all Playboy cares about.

Meni writes about Playboy.com: They can't even get their site profitable till an estimated 2003. hee hee. CE was profitable from day 1. FM can teach them a lesson in adult net biz.

Jenna Jameson Dances At Al's Diamond Cabaret

Johnny Vegas writes: hey, luke! first off i want to say that i love your website. i read it at least three times a day and checking everyso often for updates. now to my reason for writing. last night i went to see jenna jameson dance at al's diamond cabaret in reading, pa. i saw her there last year and she put on a fairly entertaining show but nothing like the one last night. she was un-f---ing-believable! the place was packed, not only with men, but a large number of women who seemed absent the last time i saw her. she came out on stage amidst large clouds of smoke to the song "awake" by godsmack. the crowd was pumped and with the tight leather number she was wearing got them even more riled up.

she has to be the best erotic dancer i've ever seen. jenna has moves like no one else. her use of the pole and the way she slithered along the dance floor was an instant turn on. her outfit came off piece by piece until she was just in a g-string and her sexy thigh-high pink platform boots. it looked as if she has had a few additions to her near perfect body as she was sporting a pair of nipple rings and a pierced clit which was ever so visible when she was nude. after the g-string came off, she really got the crowd going by laying on her back with her legs spread and pleasuring herself with a f--- me look on her face that was priceless. what really heated up the place was when she placed her finger in her mouth, the very same finger that was used just seconds ago to probe her almost completely shaved pussy.

luke, let me tell you, after seeing this show i can honestly say that jenna is THE undisputed queen of adult cinema. i very strongly urge anyone who is a fan of jenna's or anyone who is curious about seeing her to check out one of her shows. the only thing i regret is, being a newcomer in the adult biz(i just started a film company), i didn't get a chance to give her my card. maybe next time. other than that the show was spectacular and i'm looking forward to her next appearance. i also took some pictures that i need to get developed but as soon as i do, i'll send em to you. by the way, she's at al's until saturday night so if you are in the reading area, definitely go check her out. jenna rules! long live the queen!

LT writes: Luke, once again the name of Dr. Garth (Gimble) Fisher comes up. Porn girls, all I can say is Dr. Garth is a charming fellow, but that does NOT mean he's an ace or expert at his job. Neither does him being on Entertainment Tonight, Hard Copy or Extra. He has had his share of run ins. Most notably his defiant insistence on using silicone gel implants in cases where they aren't legally allowed. He also has been known to put larger implants than requested into women.

Keep in mind, Ted Bundy was charming too. Jenna, what are you getting out of this deal?...free surgeries? I'm not blastin', just askin'

Unless you've made some kind of deal, all you are doing is giving free promotion for him and his practice. And his name has been removed from the doctor search records for the State of California which can mean his license has been revoked. Jenna, you never looked better than when you had your real breasts, your real chin and real nose.

Casting Couch Confessions

Wildlife Production. Producer/Director: Tyce Bune Featuring: Kameron Mist, Yvonne Paradise, Redda Lacey, Dominica Leoni, Blazer, Claudia Adkins, Serena (other), Keri Starr, Sunset, Mystique, Cashmere Delight, Kitty Kay, Tice Bune

Pat Riley writes: I actually liked this movie because it gives you lots of background information about the girl and helps you understand what makes them tick, a sort of "human interest" angle. It's what Ed used to be good at until he decided to try to appeal to the raincoater. Tice too is a pretty good interviewer with a laid back style and a friendly attitude at the level of the girls.

On the other hand, you won't find anything erotic here and if you're into the standard porn requirements, you'll be disappointed. Some of the scenes don't even end in a cum shot and all of them are short. Presumably they went on to do a scene which has been incorporated elsewhere but one wonders what the financial arrangement with the girl was. Paid for two scenes or was she obliged to throw this one in as a freebie?

Kameron who can be seen in {Y A #21} is cute but hard-as-nails. She has poor facial skin here and tells us that the tattoo on her belly is a "she-devil". To her, sex is just exercise, and she gains no particular sexual pleasure from it. She tells a story about how her father, a "pastor", caught her screwing some guy in his church but her attitude is not one of guilty apology but defiance. She'd be hard to handle but would be an erotic challenge. Tice screws her ending in a belly cum shot.

Yvonne can be seen in {18 And Nasty #19} if you like pudgy unmarried mothers and adds that she's 20 years old and comes from Iowa (chuckle). Tice screws her with no cum shot. Tice doesn't ask how old Redda is but in {Young And Thirsty} she claims to be 22 years old. Yeah, and the rest! She looks old and has tiny tits, long brown hair, ugly face, tattoo around left bicep, racing stripe, flabby belly, lithe body, and poor dentition. The flabby belly is not too surprising when you hear that she has six kids. That's right, six! The first at age 14. In that light she has a fabulous body. She seems to have a happy personality--an earth mother type, without the fat--and jokes about her kids with Tice who seems as shocked as I was. He screws her ending in a pussy cum shot.

Dominica has her dark red long hair here and because of the language doesn't say very much and certainly nothing we don't know already. Tice screws her ending without a cum shot.

Blazer (credits Barbie Blazer) is old and ugly with long blonde hair, and a lithe body. To Tice's question, she says that she has no kids but I'd take that with a grain of salt. The rapport is not too good here so Tice screws her ending in a facial.

Claudia tells us nothing new either and Tice screws her ending without a cum shot.

Serena is ugly with long unkempt blonde hair with black roots, small/medium tits, belly button jewel, shaven pussy, and a chunky body. She says that she was de-virginized at 19 and although she has had sex with three guys she has never had an orgasm. Tice sympathizes but doesn't seem to make any particular effort and screws her ending in a facial.

Keri can be seen in {Bunghole Harlots #5} and adds that she has been married for four months and has done 20 movies. She doesn't take off her clothes not even her panties but Tice manages to screw her including an anal ending without a cum shot. Sunset is ugly with shoulder length blonde hair, shaven pussy, tiny tits, tight waist, belly button jewel, poor skin, and a lithe body. She says that she was de-virginized at 15. Tice screws her ending in a facial.

Mystique (passable face, long brown straight hair, bee-stung lips, horrible dentition, shaven pussy, tattoo right shoulder back, large droopy tits, huge areola, infant damaged belly) says that she's 19 years old, was de-virginized at 16, and has only ever had sex with one guy. Tice, the second, screws her ending with a near-internal cum shot while in doggie, much of which splats on her pussy and then drips on the couch.

Cashmere (credits: Ms. Fancy) doesn't tell us anything new. Tice screws her ending in a pussy cum shot.

Kitty is aggressive and can be seen in {More Dirty Debutantes #170}. Tice screws her using a condom and ending without a cum shot.

BOOTYLICIOUS: MAMACITAS 2001--JM Productions Producer/Director: Jeff Steward, Jim Powers Featuring: Sabrina Jayde, Catalina/Serena, Felony, Justine Romee, Wesley Pipes, Jasper Wade, Julian St Jox, Devlin Weed

There's a generally incoherent set up here of the girls having a party to raise money to import another person from Mexico or maybe it's that Catalina has never sampled a black guy and Sabrina invites a few around to give her the taste of some black dick. Justine, who appears later, might be one of Sabrina or Catalina's mother or maybe she's a roommate. Whatever, she's shocked at all the debauchery. Felony just seems to be a drunk guest at the party but she may be being initiated into something or other--a sorority perhaps? They saved money by not having any extras at this party and the only way you know it's a party, apart from the dialog, is by a few decorations around the furniture. Sabrina is slim enough but trashy, Catalina quite clearly would prefer to be somewhere else, Felony doesn't sound coherent and might really be drunk, and Justine is old, ugly, and pudgy.

A HOLES #4 2001--X-Traordinary Pict. Producer/Director: Dow Jones Featuring: Claudia Adkins, Nikita Denise, Michelle Raven, Mirage, Rick Masters, Marc Woods, Steve Taylor, Mark Davis Unlike the previous ones this doesn't seem to be an undisclosed compilation but that doesn't make it worth watching. The women are over-used, old, or just not worth the trouble of slipping it into the VCR. Claudia wants Rick to eat her pussy for her birthday (greater love hath no man...) so he does and it turns into a screw including an anal ending with a drop shot on her closed asshole. Notice her extreme crotch acne (or don't, as you prefer).

PUSSYMAN'S FASHION DOLLS 2001--Legend Video Producer/Director: David Christopher Featuring: Taylor St. Clair, Shanna McCullough, Alexandria Quinn, Jade Marcela, Daisy Chain, Nicole Sheridan, David Hardman, Rick Masters, Marty Romano, Pat Myne, Joel Lawrence, David Christopher

More worn-out unattractive hefty women in another of Christopher's casting movies. There's the usual conflict between Hardman and Christopher's new casting director, Taylor, but also as usual it goes nowhere. The slight wrinkle here is that they're not casting for a movie but to select the perfect pussy for 2001 presumably to make a molding so they can sell copies in the sex toy retailers. Once we get past the introduction, no one cares about this, least of all the director who just lets Daisy Chain's reference to taping a scene to audition for a part and Pat Myne's similar statement just slide right by.

Taylor, who wears a corset to keep her belly from overflowing, rings Hardman and gloats about her new appointment. He couldn't care less and celebrates Rick's birthday by sharing hooker Jade including a DP. Rote pro-sex with a, well, pro. Taylor looks through the catalog of Pussyman products and masturbates until Romano arrives to relieve her frustration with a screw including an anal. Note that this scene uses a condom; Romano must be particularly untrustworthy or diseased.

JUST JILL 2001--Elegant Angel Video Featuring: Jill Kelly, Daisy Chain, Amanda Rain, Coral Sands, Eric Price, Randy Spears, Ian Daniels, Chris Cannon, Julian Andretti

Well, at least they didn't try to push this one through as a set of new scenes and they actually say "collection of (...) scenes" on the box thereby properly warning the consumer. Three cheers for consumer fairness but unfortunately that's the only cheering this one gets. How many times does one have to put up with a worn out old 'ho and the mother of countless kids? Maybe back when she was married to Cal Jammer and she was known as Calista J., Jill was relatively exciting to watch but unfortunately Elegant Angel doesn't own any of that footage. Many of these are scenes from when she was the SO of Eric Price (four of the scenes) and the last is with later boyfriend, Julian. Ten scenes in total, one with a condom, one with a DP, two just a BJ, another two just g/g's, and apart from the DP, three containing anals.

GANG BANG ANGELS #19 2000--Elegant Angel Video Producer/Director: Zoltan Bango, Livia Bango Featuring: Miranda, Linda, Lucky, Obed, Den Rico, Reno, Don Camelo, Robert, Runcajz, Carlos Hopeless.

The guys play soccer in a gym until Miranda, an ugly blonde with hairy armpits, medium/large tits, and a chunky body arrives and makes them do push ups. She seems to be some sort of female officer and they seem to be in the military. One of the "soldiers" turns out to be Linda, a not too pretty, dumb looking brunette with medium tits. Without reason the guys gang bang the two girls including the usual anals, oral, vaginal, and DP's. It ends mainly in facials. There is no emotion except boredom, the moaning is fake, and the guys look a little on the fey side. The only interest here is in the directors who have changed their name from {#18} but are presumably the same couple.

RIPE #11 2000--Forbidden Films Producer/Director: Don Marque Featuring: Sandy, Rene, Eve (Hungarian), Keki D'Aire, Fawna, Gia Regency, Herschel Savage, Jay Ashley, David Hardman

What on earth is Dane/Forbidden Films doing? This is terrible, with poor video, poor sound, little set-up, and marginal women. It almost looks like a collection of left-over scenes from prior years (see the dates of production) that weren't good enough at the time to put in an earlier volume and if so, what makes them think that we want to see them now?

Sandy is pretty with long blonde hair, nice tight body, small/medium tits, and a tight waist. Rene has a passable face, shoulder length blonde hair, medium tits, and a lithe body. There's an attempt at an interview during which they both say they're Russian but the problem is not command of the English language but a lack of seriousness that they apply to the questions. It's all a big joke and they giggle though it before doing a perfunctory short g/g during which neither get to the point of removing their panties.

Eve, with blonde hair here, lies in a jacuzzi in a camisole until Herschel arrives and screws her on the surrounds ending in a belly cum shot. There's no rationale and the sex is horribly bad. Just masturbating into a hole and abbreviated at that.

Keki bounces on a trampoline and her surplus fat bounces in the opposite direction making her look even pudgier than normal.

In the last scene, Hardman instructs Gia (looking quite attractive) on the fine art of tennis playing and naturally this leads to a screw including an anal ending in a tit cum shot. The camerawork here is disgraceful with the sex taking place on a tennis court in the late afternoon and the shadows making it virtually impossible to see the action, not that there seems to be anything but perfunctory sex to see.

The Adventures Of Ass-Hole Andy Armageddon #1

The GOOD is only for Taylor in the last scene. She simply so cute (see her in {Young Muff #3}) that despite some probable loss of belly muscle tone it would be a shame to pass this one by. The rest will undoubtedly appeal to the most degraded raincoater/juvenile possible, the only thing detracting from that appeal being that the girls are not overweight nor big titted.

INTERRACIAL FRATS #1 2001--Rain Productions Producer/Director: Mitchell Spinelli

This is another one of Spinelli's poorly produced interview-and-screw near-debutante tapes similar in format to the {White Panty Chronicles} and {Anal University} series. That means the camerawork is poor, lighting is bad, the sound is muffled, and none of the scenes have any sort of premise or mini-plot. As to the girls in this one, we have three pretty ones with infant damaged bodies and one near-beastie. Damn shame there are so many teenage and young mothers in the industry but I suppose they have to have a place to work.

YOUNG MUFF #3 2000--Armageddon Entert. Producer/Director: Derek Newblood Featuring: Felony, Mia Starr, Taylor McKay, Julia Schaeffer, Priscilla Jane, Amber Wood (2000), Luciano (Mike Long), Claudio Cazzo, Jay Ashley, Marc Woods, Brandon Iron

I hate giving a GOOD to this sort of movie. The music's ridiculously loud; the color is off especially for Mia's scene; the camerawork is poor; the interviews are perfunctory; the girls lie; the guys treat them like crap although they're not nearly as bad as Max, Anabolic, or the European movies; the sex is mostly perfunctory; and three (or maybe four) of the girls are nothing to write home about. You might even be ashamed to be seen in the company of Priscilla Jane.

On the other hand, the makeup is good (Mia in particular is looking better than in any of her other appearances), there's only one anal and one multiple male scene, the girls are relatively fresh, and although some of them lie and say they're 18 but are probably early twenties, at least they're about the right age to be doing porno. No old biddies. The best thing though is Taylor McKay. Despite some minor defects, this girl could just sit there and the movie would be worth watching.

The Most Infuriating Scene Of 2001

Ridley99 writes on RAME: i have it...and believe me i am still mad as hell. figure this out i buy the vid " to Completion " because it promises the biggest cum scenes of all time and becomes it has Guage on the boxcover. now Guage is one of the cutest/sexiest girls ever to do porn ,you could lose yourself forever in her deep blue eyes. so here she is ready to suck cock and take a massive facial, and she is free of her suitcase pimp boyfriend..the one who looks to choke her with his dick till she vomits. so shes act all cute and sexy. i am sprung...ya know what i mean...but wait here comes the cold water...the asshole behind the camera tells her to put on a blindfold....tell me you are not serious dude..the cutest girl in porn histiory a girl with unbelievably beautiful eyes and you are going to cover her eyes and half her face with a blindfold. WHY...OH WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT...( ridley answer to self....DRUGS LOTS AND LOTS OF DRUGS ) i wanted to take a bite out of the tape...s--- porn can get you mad..... for 15 minurtes i said to the TV take off the blindfold..TAKE Off the f---in blindfold...well she finally did for the last 5 minutes of the scene but by then i was incinerated. okay the cumscene was good its Steve Austin and the dude ,Master Blaster. but its really nothing special. and the rest of the blowjobs on the tape are boring, same girls you've already seen a dozen times before in everything form Dr Fellatio to shut up and blow me. speaking of that. this is to the director of this vid the one who told Guage to put on the blindfold..the next time you think you have a brillant idea...put the blinfold in your mouth and swallow it.

Luke F-rd Live Cancelled

One too many times I published something incorrect about Cybererotica. As a result the big boss Ron Levi pulled my radio show this week from Albumside.com. Ron giveth and Ron taketh away. Long live the king!

Ironically, I had just signed up my first advertiser - the good folks at EroticVideos.com. And Jimmy and I had more followers than Charles Manson.

My cohost James DiGiorgio writes: Way to go, Lukey! I was just getttin in the groove of being a net-radio personality and you go and f--- the whole thing up! AND... just when we get our first advertiser to sign up. What did you do to piss off this Ron Levi guy? I thought jews stuck together? He got pissed cuz yu f---ed with him a few times? Tell him to get over it. This is business...it ain't personal. If I let you all the times you f---ed with me get to me I woulda set you up for the big fall a long time ago. Hey Ronnie, here's some words to live by: "Accept it, deal with it, and move the f--- on." And don't forget what Don Corleone said: "Keep your friends close and your enemies closer." Was this Levi guy not makin money offa you, Luke? Doesnt he know about that tachlitz thing? Maybe he oughta go to temple with yu and learn something. Personally, I love the tachlitz concept. I'm thinkin of converting because of it. Can you recommend a good, porn-wop-friendly Temple? . Anyway, I dont wanna lose my radio edge, Lukey, so you better come up with something to replace this...gah-beesh? Tell Eyada we're available. Maybe your pal Dave Sturman will sponsor our show--he certainly understands the Don Corleone rule. C'mon Lukey, do something!

Luke says: Tachlis is a Yiddish word that mean brass tacks, real life. It means, a buck is a buck. We're talking a buck here, pal.

By the way folks, Jimmy and I are ready to take our show on the road. We're available to the highest bidder. Email Luke

Was The Mafia Behind The Killing Of Robert Blake's Wife?

Ron writes: Hello Luke, I was wondering if there was any connection between Robert Blake's wife being killed and the mafia? Obviously, the subject of the mob in porn is becoming more and more reported by the national media with the example of the Gold Club in Atlanta having ties to the mob. I was wondering if this was also true with the dead Mrs. Blake, who was heavily involved in the porn industry (internet) before marrying Mr. Blake. I wonder if she ever pissed off someone enough to have that person enact revenge upon her, like someone in the mob. Just thinking about it and thought I would share some of my thoughts on the subject. I was thinking that this might a good story for you to look into if you where having a slow newsday.

Time Is No Longer On Luke F-rd's Side

Helpful writes: Gentlemen: You are no doubt aware that the birthday of Luke F-rd is rapidly approaching. On Memorial Day Luke will turn 35! At this point he will be mathematically closer to age 40 than 30. The man is pushing 40 and is still living like a f---ing student! It does not take a crystal ball to see where Luke's future prospects lay if he stays in this dead end porno rut.

ps I am shocked that he hasn't posted his birthday gift wish list on his site yet. The man is usually shameless about pandering for gifts.

Luke says: I turn 35 on May 28. Send your gifts to 264 S. La Cienega Blvd., PMB 1417, BH, CA 90211.

Chaim Amalek writes: Closer to 40 hell, Luke will be closer to 50 than to 20, closer to social security than to his first day of school. I know what Luke's strategy is - marry up and let his wife worry about the money. THAT's why he concetrates on older jewish spinsters with fancy degrees, when most men in his shoes (and, to be fair, skin) would be concentrating on getting a young (albeit pennyless) honey. Better execute this strategy this year Luke; the window is closing on you from both ends.

Rumdar writes: A bogus plan. These women are hoping to find some sucker to take care of them. While guys will marry down to get some young clam (what they consider a trophy), women are more practical. They want a guy with "robert dinero." When Luke mentions his dream of the 10,000 sq. ft. house in suburbia, the two perfect kids and the family SUV, I always wonder who he expects to pay for all that? His latest neurotic Jewish squeeze? Dream on young man. Better to be mining the hearts and minds of some dim wit shicksas, they are more easily bulls---ted.

The man is usually shameless about pandering for gifts. I have some restaurant coupons I am not using. That would be a birthday gift and donation to the dating fund.

Yankel writes: Levi: You're asking me for date suggestions? My idea of a good date is to stay at home with Rivkah and watch "Blind Date." I have always believed that most dates pull focus from the important issue which is to get to know the other person. So when Rivkah and I were going out we usually went out for coffee, sat and talked for hours. That way there was no anxiety about money being spent, and "are we having a good time?" Dates should be about chemistry -- physical and mental. If she insists on super dates, then move on to the next woman.

Yitz writes Luke: More and more, it has become clear to me that you are like Captain Ahab. Speeding towards your obliteration. Your white whale is the .... If you think they're not going to investigate your livelihood, you do not know ...

I take no joy at all in what you have done to yourself. It's like watching a train wreck in slow motion. There is nothing that I can do to help you. You can be indignant if you want, but it is misplaced. I have always tried to be a good friend to you. I just wonder what you're going to do when the XXX rejects your application. Will you just fall back to the Wolpe's of the world? They have minimal standards afterall and I suppose you'll have no choice.

You do have the option of finding another line of work. But clearly you love your niche in porno more than you love Judaism.

Rumdar writes: Why look for approval from people? You are the one and only Luke F-rd for Christsakes. Unique in what you do. Why should this shlunk feel morally superior to you? Why do you listen to him and what the hell is Beit Din? Sounds like a new dish at Kim Son, my local Vietnamese restaurant. Take a tip from Groucho. Give up any organization that would have you as a member.

Use your money wisely. First buy a new pair of shoes. Gives the Charlie Chaplain's to Good Will. Next, Link up with high profile moneyed Jews in the business and use their influence and funds to found the first Jewish Porno Synagogue in America. It is time for a breakaway wing of the Jewish religion. You may laugh, but they have one here in H-Town. The high priestess is a lesbian and the members are all the wackos, misfits and weirdoes who like you Luke who were drummed out of their former places of worship. Buddy, don't take anymore crap from those people. It is time to move on.

Porn star Ruby writes from the Moonlight Bunny Ranch: Luke, Can you eat shrimp? Killer Shrimp is really good but spicy, and only has 3 choices(good for indecisive women like me). The Cheese and Olive on Venice Blvd. buy the beach has a nice patio, and a nice atmosphere. Take her to the Promenade and let her choose. PLEASE tell me that you haven't taken your dates to Souplantation!!! No wonder you haven't been getting laid!!! Don't give me the Jewish frugality bit, because you were born Christian. You should be spending at least 80 to 100 dollars, hell, I'd spend that on taking you out!!! She needs to see you as a viable mate, it's in her DNA, SO SPEND SOME MONEY !!! Nobody likes a tightwad!! As for getting some nookie on the first date, I was always a fan of not waiting, who has that kind of time? Could you imagine waiting months and then finding out your not sexually compatible? I also think that sex is a good way to get to know someone, a test if you will, either they call or don't call. If they call then you know that it must be a little more than that, because they already got some nookie. If he judges you for f---ing too soon then you know you don't want him!!! But at least you had a good time. If you don't want to spend money I better teach you how to cook!! There's hope for you yet, Deuce !!!

Chaim Amalek writes: The prevalence of so many jews in therapy, cults, and the democratic party is damning proof of the dangers of inbreeding. No wonder the gate-keepers wish to keep you out.

You know, they have shuls (jewish temples) like that here in New York. Gays, dykes, the "transgendered" and even straights are welcome. Never been there myself, but if I had to choose between a shul that was run by an orthodox bet din and Temple Beth Dyke, I would go for the dyke shul.

As an aside, years ago I dated a woman who was a lot like Luke. She was not in porn, but she was born into protestantism, became an orthodox jew, and then ended up a Wiccan Jewess with her own coven! She never told the rabbis what she did, so she remained a jew in good standing.

The problem is that there is a fundamental mismatch between what you, as a thinking human being, the bearer of genes that created Western Civilization, think (and how you think), and what some obscurant inbred rabenim think you should pretent to think. Orthodox judaism mandates mendacity and hypocracy in virtually all of its adherents save the utterly ignorant and the stupid, and is harshly unforgiving.

In contrast to Christianity, which is a welcoming faith that accepts sinners even as it damns the sin. What a refreshing - and necessary - counterpoint to orthodox judaism. No wonder thinking people have been fleeing rabbinical judaism for as long as they have had the option.

No matter how harshly the Jews treat you, remember, in Christian Theology - JESUS LOVES YOU.

Luke, is there an end-game to all this? As I have said before, the only reasons to be in porn (which you are) are: 1. to get laid 2. to make vast sums of money. You do neither. The only thing left that I can think of is to bring it all down, which you are very unlikely to do.

Confessions Of Love

Farrell Timlake writes from Homegrown Video: Of course I see the humor of our mention in Newsweek. I have a good enough sense of humor to laugh whether you are laughing with me or at me. Be it satire, sarcasm, slapstick, ironic, high or low comedy, or be it rib tickling, knee slapping, guffaws, giggles, snickers, whatever, if it is funny, then I am happy. I view the Luke F-rd site as one long darkly humored joke on the whole porn industry, and that is what attracts me to participating in all its ribaldry and witticisms, and all the winking nudge nudges in the ribs of the adult industry. I am entirely grateful for someone like Brandy to play so straight to my crazy antics. She brings strength and intelligence to the part like few others are capable of doing. I hope someday she will see me for the decent fellow I really am beneath the prickly veneer of my caustic wit. Then we can French kiss and make-up before I f--- her like the naughty schoolgirl horny little minx she truly is.

Luke Gets Mail

Arnold writes: What's this obsession you have with orthodox jews and "ethical monotheism," antisemitism, etc. it doesn' t seem to fit with the theme of your site.

XXX writes: I was VERY impressed with Marilyn Chambers. Articulate, charming and works hard for the money--she wore me out just following her around for the better part of a day. Someone at dinner held her in contrast to Jena Jameson, who I'm told once faked a leg injury and limped off while a bunch of fans waited for Polaroids. Marilyn tells me she's doing radio now. Are you familiar with her show?

Frank writes: Do you know whatever happened to the guy who did the pool table scene with Marilyn in Insatiable? I think his name is David Morris. Any help would be much appreciated. Also, she mentioned a Tony Dance (phonetic spelling) during a signing last week in St. Louis, but I haven't heard of him. Have you?

Joe writes: after i watched the movie rated X about the mitchell bros. marilyn had a on line chat on hbo.com.one viewer asked if she was ever romantically linked to any of her co star performers .she stated the only person was the person from the pool table scene but stated she forgot his name .i think she was triing to protect his idenity

LT writes: Luke, since Gloria Leonard seems to have a history with everyone asking these questions about the FSC, perhaps I can make a query without getting a obnoxious reply. We'll see... Gloria, I realize the FSC is more oriented to the producers than the performers, but what is the FSC's stance on issues that could prove serious to the adult industry. These being:

1. The escalating abuse on sets (the controversy over the "Rough Sex" videos).

2. Drug usage on sets or shooting performers who are obviously under the influence of narcotics. And...

3. The coercion some producers, directors and agents use to get actresses to perform certain activities or get cosmetic surgery. I would appreciate you clarifying the FSC's stances on these issues. Thank you.

Sarah writes Luke: I think it is wonderful that you are in therapy with someone who has just been to the Forum and is married to a founder of EST. You are SO lucky, and all you do is b----. Your therapy is progressing so much faster than would be possible with a non-EST therapist! Take the breakthrough you shared earlier this week, the one about how you set yourself up to be judged (and found wanting) then get mad at people who do so. A traditional therapist will spend a lot of time working with you to discover why/how you came to look at yourself as "bad" (or "evil" or "a sinner" - I'm not sure what the word is, you'll have to determine), but an EST-ee will provide more. As you see that you have set up your entire life to prove that you are "bad", an EST-ee can coach you to see some alternatives...to look at what you always wanted to be, but thought you couldn't be...

Fred writes Luke: I would never go to a therapist who is an EST member. EST people inherently have psychological problems. I've known a few EST people, and they use EST because they are desperate for some type of acceptance, community, etc., or they have some other severe problem. I've gone to their introductory seminars. They're heavy-handed, manipulative, and Orwellian. Just a personal thought and observation. All of these people would be better off joining the cult of Fred. (Or at least their teenage daughters would be.)

Kevin Beechum, Russell Hampshire's Role In Reuben Sturman Bombing Affair

ARGUED JANUARY 4, 1995--DECIDED MARCH 14, 1995 Before BAUER, and MANION, Circuit Judges, and MILLER, District Judge.

Reuben Sturman was convicted of conspiracy to commit extortion, attempted extortion, and travel in interstate commerce for the purposes of com- mitting extortion. 18 U.S.C. secs. 1951, 1952. He contends on appeal that the trial court proceeding was fraught with error and asks, on that basis, that we reverse his con- viction or at least vacate portions of his sentence. We find his arguments unpersuasive, and so we affirm.

I. From his home state of California, Reuben Sturman operated a nationwide wholesale and retail adult entertainment business for over thirty years. His power and influence was such that many in the industry believed that he was the industry. Sturman had substantial control over distribution of adult videos and magazines and marital aids. A significant portion of his income came from small operators located throughout the United States, who paid Sturman for supplies or services in organizing and run- ning local enterprises. Sturman's fiery relationship with operators in Phoenix, Cleveland, and Chicago led to the prosecution of this case.

Tamara Green took over the ownership and operation of the Book Cellar, a chain of several adult book stores in Phoenix, Arizona, after her husband, Howard, the store's previous owner, passed away in 1990. The Book Cellar leased peep show video equipment from Sturman. Soon after taking over the business, Green learned that, for several months, her husband had been paying Sturman twice the amount called for in the lease agreement. Green instructed her accountant to suspend all payments until October of 1991 when the accumulated credit would be exhausted and at which point they could resume payment at the contract rate.

Sturman was not particularly pleased with Green's decision. On several occasions in the fall of 1991, Sturman told Green's accountant and general manager that unless Green paid him the additional money, he would "send her a message." In November of 1991, Herbert Feinberg, an employee of Sturman's, asked Kevin Beechum to hire some people "to smash a bookstore in Phoenix, Arizona." Beechum hired Jay Brisette, Donald Mares, and Paul Mahn and instructed them to vandalize one of Green's stores because she wasn't paying the money which she owed. On December 21, 1991, Brisette, Mares, and Mahn entered Green's store with hammers and baseball bats and pro- ceeded to cause approximately $10,000 in property dam- age. Convinced that this was Sturman's "message," Green resumed paying Sturman at a monthly rate twice that of the agreement. Sturman's secretary testified that when she asked Sturman why Green had resumed paying the higher rate, he replied, "I sent her a message and she understood."

Mel Kamins had been associated with Sturman since 1955. In 1986, Kamins purchased several Cleveland adult entertainment businesses from Sturman. His agreement with Sturman required Kamins to make monthly payments ranging between $60,000 and $90,000 for ten years to Sturman or Sturman's nominees.

In the meantime, the IRS had discovered that Sturman was significantly delinquent on his prior tax obligations. Consequently, the IRS served upon Kamins and others owing obligations to Sturman, tax levies directing those persons to pay directly to the IRS any money owed to Sturman.

After Kamins began complying with the levy, Sturman contacted Kamins in an effort to persuade him to ignore the levy and continue the payments. Alternatively, Sturman urged Kamins to skim his profits and pay Sturman in cash. Kamins refused.

Sturman proceeded to hire a man named James Long to investigate the level of security at Kamins's stores. Long had performed security-oriented work for Sturman in the past. Sturman told Long that Kamins had not been paying Sturman what he owed. Later that month (February 1992), Sturman and Long visited Kamins's store. When Kamins again insisted on honoring the IRS levy, Sturman wrote Kamins a note which read, "You are going to get a message." Though nothing ever was done to Kamins or his business, Feinberg did discuss with Kevin Beechum the possibility of hiring Beechum's men to do a few more jobs in Cleveland. It appears as if the only thing that saved Kamins from a fate similar to that of Green were the developments taking place in Chicago.

Roy May and his wife, Paula, owned and operated several adult entertainment businesses in Chicago. They had an arrangement with Sturman that entitled Sturman to a certain percentage of the profits received from their peep show receipts. Under this arrangement, the Mays typically delivered to one of Sturman's nominees a cash payment ranging from $60,000 to $100,000 every four to six weeks. This portion of the Mays' revenues was never reported to the IRS. Sturman frequently demanded that in addition to the payments, the Mays give him title to half of their real estate holdings, the purchase of which Sturman had absolutely nothing to do with. Understandably, the Mays refused these demands.

In 1987, Paula May was indicted for tax evasion. Subsequently, Roy May ceased making the payments to Sturman. Sturman then suggested that May pay Sturman the money through a consulting arrangement. Although he received no benefit from this arrangement, May consented to the deal for fear that if he did not, Sturman would ruin him financially. During the term of the consulting contract, May resumed his profit-skimming cash payments to Sturman, albeit at a lower rate.

In 1988, Roy May refused to renew the consulting con- tract. Again, however, his fear of what Sturman might do to him and his business caused him to agree to pay Sturman $3.7 million for the rights to show adult films produced by Sturman's new company, Wild Man Films Inc., despite knowing that these films were worth no more than $200,000. May never used these films.

When the IRS began sending tax levies to Sturman's various debtors, Sturman suggested that he and May cancel their Wild Man Films contract so that May would have nothing to pay to the IRS. They did so but soon thereafter, Sturman began pressuring May to resume paying him. Sturman asked May to start making payments to a company named Video Views, which Sturman insisted could not be traced to Sturman. Reluctant to violate the IRS levy, May refused.

In the spring of 1992, Feinberg once again hired Brisette and his men, this time for a job in Chicago. After the financial arrangements were completed, Brisette and three others, Donald Mares, Paul Mahn, and Joseph Martinez, flew to Chicago. They intended to plant several remote- controlled bombs at eight of May's Chicago stores. After successfully planting a bomb at the first site, Mares and Mahn were travelling to a store on Wells Street when one of their bombs detonated in their car at the intersection of Dearborn and Division streets. Mahn fled the scene. Mares died as a result of injuries sustained in the explosion.

After hearing about the explosion, Brisette and Martinez aborted their efforts and together with Mahn, returned to Los Angeles. From there, the plan continued to unravel.

Still panicked from what had happened in Chicago, Brisette began to cooperate with the FBI. As part of his co- operation, Brisette participated in a tape-recorded conversation with Feinberg. The FBI then approached Feinberg and asked him to cooperate in a case against Sturman. Feinberg refused and then went to meet with Russell Hampshire, another figure in the California adult entertainment industry and a friend of Sturman's. In his conversation with Hampshire, Feinberg stated that he had been hired by Sturman to damage some stores in Chicago and that one of the people involved was killed. Feinberg asked Hampshire to assure Sturman that Feinberg would not cooperate with the police as long as Sturman helped him with his legal fees. When Hampshire passed on Feinberg's message, Sturman told Hampshire that he would take care of Feinberg's legal fees. A few months later, Sturman transferred $25,000 from his account to an account held by Feinberg's attorney.

Sturman and Feinberg were indicted together but tried separately. Sturman was convicted on Counts One, Seven, and Eight of a ten-count indictment. Count One charged Sturman and Feinberg with conspiring to commit extortion with respect to Green, Kamins, and the Mays. 18 U.S.C. sec. 1951. Count Seven charged Sturman and Feinberg with an attempt to commit extortion in connection with their threats to the Mays between November of 1991 and November 1992. Id. Count Eight charged Sturman and Feinberg with causing persons to travel in interstate commerce for the purpose of promoting extortion. 18 U.S.C. sec. 1952. Sturman was acquitted of the remaining charges. The court sentenced Sturman to 235 months in prison and imposed a two-year term of supervised release. Sturman appeals his conviction and his sentence.