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Wednesday, February 28th, 2001

Roger Pipe Interviews Daisy Chain

Daisy Chain entered porn two years ago at age 33. She tells Rog: I got into the business with my long time boyfriend, James Lynn Strait the singer for a band named Snot. Our first film was for Matt Zane. We did it as a couple, playing off the fact that a rock star was doing porn. Backstage Sluts 2 was my first movie and I did under my real name. After doing that, I had so much fun that I decided to do more girl/girl stuff. We were going to roll that into our whole thing, with the music and the internet. Unfortunately, he passed away. He was killed in a car accident in December of 1998. I had been in the business for about six months at that point. It happened two days after our second scene and that scene was the last time we had sex. I stayed in the business, staying true to our original plan, which was to have me just do other women. I couldn’t do men because I don’t like multiple male partners. When I have a male mate, that is my man. It takes a lot for me to make that commitment, so I couldn’t just show up on sets and have sex with men. That’s not for me, but I can do that with women. I love the alter ego of it, what it’s like to be a guy, come in, f--- a girl, not know her name and never have to call her again.

I’m too much of a stoner. If I had a web site, I wouldn’t keep up with my email and I would disappoint my fans. I stay away from that all together. No fan mail, no web site. I like staying underground. If people like my movies great, if not, then they haven’t heard of me.

Marina Pacifica

Anyone know anything about Marina Pacifica? I hear they're a video distribution company owned by Nick and Uri. Nick's Greek and Uri's Israeli. Nick's been around a long time. They're located in the San Fernando Valley. They produce videos. They're looking to go online.

Lynne L-patin: Bruce and I worked for Marina Pacific for a year and a half, Luke
Lynne L-patin: I didn't know an Israeli named Uri, just Avi Raccah and Motti (Mordecai) Green, who had left the company by the time I met you

I heard about a total disaster with Chi Chi LaRue and Starlite Media that cost one small porner $10,000.

Vivid Girl Lori Michaels Checks In

Lori Michaels writes: Good afternoon Mr. Ford. I'm down here in Austin and thought of you when I went to the store today. I get constipated when I first leave to go on the road. (or maybe I'm getting ready to make a web cam for my vip room, hehe ) Anyway, I bought some enemas and some bananas at the store. Now you are wondering why am I emailing you about this, right? Ok, the bananas are a food item and the enema is a drug item.

Remember when I emailed you about the "fact" that you don't pay sales tax on groceries or drugs (including prescriptions) in Texas? And do you remember this democrate who emailed you and said I was full of s---? Well, here is a pic of the sales receipt today. Please find the sales tax for me. Oh, you say they didn't charge sales tax? Well, I guess you better tell that Texas democrat who make his rude comment to print out the sales receipt, roll it up, and stick it up his ass. By the way, send me a sales receipt from California. Lets see if there is sales tax on it. And send me your W2 and show me how much income tax you paid the state of California. I don't have to send you mine. You don't pay income tax in Texas. And Texas has electricity also. Yep, lots of it. See, we don't have these democratic assholes running around that are not letting companies build a power plant because it might make a couple mice move their little grass homes. Of course, Clinton could have put forth an energy policy, but he was to busy chasing pussy and f---ing over the country. But you guys keep voting in those democrates out there so you can pay all those taxes, ok? That way we don't have to pay any.

And did you notice the various newspapers and organizations finished the recounts in Florida. Who won Luke? Damn, no headlines about it though, is there? Look at all the crap they are finding out about Clinton. Who was right Luke? Who's are man? Bush of course. Damn right!! I'm pumped, I'm replublican, and proud of it. And please don't print stupid things in your column "they are taking adult servers out of Dallas because of Ashcroft". Who the hell sends you these stupid comments? Tell these people to get their heads out of their ass and concentrate on something productive. They must have gone to the class on "lets lie and scare the people" that Gore attended.

Did I tell you that at Mardi Gras last saturday night the cops in Austin were picking up the beads and handing them to the flashing women. (even though a bunch of drunk college kids ruined it for everyone later in the night and they canceled the parade on fat tuesday) Yep, love this Bush country. I also am sending you a pic of the gas and brake pedal on my diesel pusher motorhome. I've had a few people make comments wondering if I really can drive it. Ok, here is what you do. The left pedal is the air brakes. You push it to stop. The right pedal is the throttle. You press it to go. And that wheel above is what you turn to stay on the road. Yep, it takes a masters degree to drive one of these big rigs. hehe Then again, a good democrat will scare the hell out of ya and tell you that a small girl can't do it. You need the government to do it for you.

PS: I won't be selling novelties on my fantasytown site anymore. Howard [Levine] at Vivid called the distributor that I was buying from and told them not to sell to me. Yep, they don't beleive in free enterpise. I'll bet Howard is a good ol' democrat. He didn't like me getting a better deal.

Luke says: Vivid has its own deal with the SexToyNetwork.com.

JRob writes: I am affiliated with no particular political party. I think certain concerns are better dealt with from the conservative view point, and others from the more liberal view point. However, there is a basic misconception (as set forth by Ms. Michaels) that environmentalists are to blame for the current power problem in California.

The current problem lies in conservative desires to deregulate the power industry in California. The lack of government oversight for the citizens' benefit resulted in this problem (though it also resulted in a windfall for stockholders).

The simple fact is that every time an industry is deregulated, we folk are sold on it by being told that deregulation will cause more competition and, therefore, lower costs for us. The actual result is monopolies (or the next reasonable facsimile) that end up charging us more.

Try flying. Since deregulation, the "Hub" system has taken over and most major cities (other than New York, Chicago, and L.A.) are stuck with one major airline and a host of minor, pissant competitors who make no difference.

Telephone? If you don't like your local carrier, try finding someone else. Anyone else.

Cable? There used to be a number of different companies from whom to choose. Now, most cities have AT&T cable or Turner Cable.

Deregulation brought us all of these choices, and there are dozens of other examples. Deregulation is always sold to the government and consumers as the chance for more choice, competition, and lower prices. It always (correction: ALMOST always) results in fewer choices and higher prices for the consumer. What deregulation accomplishes is higher immediate profits for the the corporations.

The rest of Ms. Michaels' message is nothing with which I can argue. I just don't know anything about state or sales taxes in Texas. No doubt she is correct as she is there and I am not. Besides, she is stunningly gorgeous and that goes a long way with me. The thrust of my gist is that California's power problems are not the fault of liberal tree huggers. Their power problems are the fault of right wing "less government is better" jerk weeds whose only constituency was, in fact, the stock holders who immediately profited from deregulation.

And, I think Prime Minister Cheney is doing a reasonably good job running the country so far.

Wayne Gordon writes: Luke, Neither Lori Michaels nor Jrob has it completely right regarding the causes of the California energy crisis.

Lori is right in that the tree-huggers are a big part of the problem. California hasn't added squat to it's energy-producing capacity in years in large part due to onerous environmental rules, not to mention siting issues wherein Californians seem to have thrown NIMBY over the side in favor of BANANA (build absolutely nothing, anywhere near anybody.) I'ts hard to generate power without new power plants when your energy consumption has been growing an average of 10-13% per year for the last decade.

As to deregulation, I don't see how JRob can blame deregulation when the rates consumers pay is limited by state law. How do you think Cal Edison and others are going bankrupt? They have been forced to buy power on the spot market because regulations say they can't enter into long-term contracts with suppliers. Meanwhile, they can't pass along these costs to consumers because of rate caps. Hence bankruptcy looms.

Call all this what you want, but it ain't deregulation by any stretch. So what you really have is a botched, half-assed attempt at deregulation, in combination with unmet needs for increased power causing the crisis. I laugh when I read that Gray Davis says California is on the "backside" of the problem. Just wait till summer when demand spikes. No rain in the Northeast to fill the reservoirs for hydroelectric surpluses usually sent to California. It's gonna be a nightmare that makes this winter look like a walk in th park. Count on it.

The Controversy Rages - Is Taylor St. Claire Available For Escorting?

Kelly writes Luke: Hi, I just wanted to say thanks for posting the news about Taylor and nicisgirls. I don't think there is much Taylor can do to get these sites to take her pic down when she doesn't work for them, but I hope people realize they're being subjected to bait and switch. Taylor does work for Allure though. I remember her telling me that a while ago, saying she'd worked a dozen bachelor parties through Allure.

Wolfman writes: Luke; I don't want to embarass anyone but I met Taylor St. Claire last July through Nici's Girls when I was in LA at the Four Seasons. She was a lovely lady, total PSE/GFE. If I remember correctly her rate was $5,000 for the night. I think that she was living with fellow sexers Missy and Mickey G. at the time, she even offered to meet me with her roomie the next time I saw her. I think Kelly needs to get her facts straight. I hope Taylor is still available , I am planning a trip out west again and I would love to take her up on her offer.

NicisGirls: Yes, Taylor has worked for me.
NicisGirls: I am so sick of this crap.
NicisGirls: Sunny has worked for me too but not in a long time.
NicisGirls: I didn't even know that she had left the biz.
NicisGirls: She did leave me a message last year but I just thought she wanted to know if I had anything for her.
NicisGirls: So I had my webmaster take her pics down.

Kelly replies: Hi Luke, I guess the next time I see something being said about Taylor maybe I should just let it pass because I everytime I try to clear something up, I just confuse the situation even more. Everything I know I've told you.

On November 13, 2000, Taylor sent me an e-mail asking me to take down a link I had up to www.nicisgirls.com on my site. She said that she didn't work for them ANYMORE and that they just give people who call for her other girls. That is the only time she has ever mentioned to me anything about her escorting.

Does she escort anymore? I honestly don't know for sure. I know that www.adultstarfantasy.com lists her as being available in their site's VIP section. I don't want to say for sure, but my guess would be that she still does escort, but not for cheap.

As for what Nici said...she didn't say that Taylor works for her. She just said that Taylor has workED for her. That's what I was saying...that she didn't work for her now, but she had in the past.

As for Wolfman, you met Taylor back in July. I heard what I heard from Taylor in mid November. Also, by now Mickey G. and Missy aren't living together anymore. Missy has left the industry and broken up with Mickey. Mick is dating Lola and I belive Taylor lives with both of them.

This isn't a scoop...Mickey said these things himself on www.generossextreme.com a long time ago. I've asked Taylor to clear this all up for me, and I'll let you know what she tells me.

Luke F-rd Live - Where The Cognitive Elite Meet And Marry

James DiGiorgio is off shooting today so I did Luke F-rd Live from 4-6PM PST on WebmasterLive.com with Lee Noga, Hooper, Farrell Timlake from HomegrownVideo.com, AlienX@SinCityFilms.com and Mike South and Samantha Sterlyng in the second hour. It was a great show. Listen here. Read the chat here.

Farrell Timlake: "I'm jumping in front of the camera with anyone willing and female. There's no telling what I will be doing tomorrow because I am a total f---ing freak.

"There was a long hiatus. My wife didn't want me to perform for a few years. But she's cool with it again so I've still got a raging case of hormones that I'm trying to get rid of... I'm everything from the guy who picks up the towels after the shoot to the guy who runs the company. There's no task that I am too good for.

"It was my wife's [Sue] idea for us to get into the business. It was her idea to make some movies so that we could go to more Grateful Dead shows.

"We have a deep and lasting internal personal relationship. I met Sue and within 48 hours asked her to move to California. And she agreed and we've been together ever since. Seventeen years."

Luke: "Tim, what sort of gear does one wear when picking up semen soaked towels on a porn shoot?"

Tim: "There's the toxic waste suit. It takes about a half an hour to get into because you have to get the ventilator just right or you will asphyxiate yourself. And make sure the tongs are sterilized."

Luke: "Do you enjoy doing double penetration with another guy?"

Tim: "It's very complicated and it is not something that I do in my personal life. All of our stuff is spontaneous. We don't hire people to do double penetration."

Luke: "What's it like as a pornographer raising kids?"

Tim: "As a parent raising kids, as a pornographer, I don't see it being an issue. They are still young [four and seven years of age]... My hope is that I will raise my kids with enough integrity and intelligence to make informed decisions for themselves and stand up for whatever they feel is right. I did not enter the porn world out of any sense of desperation.

"I spent two years with my wife discussing every implication possible... And what attracted us to making Homegrown was not that we thought it was degrading or evil but something that was a celebration...

"If my kids are pissed off that I did porn, I've got to deal with that when it comes.

"There are things that are far scarier to me as an influence on my children... I am more scared what watching Disney movies will do to their young minds... For that reason, my kids are in the Waldorf schools. They don't want kids exposed to any sort of mass media.

"Name me any Disney movie from the last ten years and I will tell you where the pornography was... From bestiality in Beauty and the Beast to incest in Lion King..."

Luke: "Do your kids get sullen and resentful when asked to help out with the editing and the boxcover art?"

Tim: "They totally get pissed off especially when I ask them to do the double anal stuff. They'd rather mow the lawn.

"I think that I am only successful because I am following a belief rather than the almighty dollar. We're here to make a world where sex is safe.

"I'm prepared for anything. I've had my world turned upside down. I got sued by Nabisco years ago for a movie that Al Borda made... And I've had other companies who owe us money go down the tubes, almost sending us down the tubes.

"Borda made a movie called "Whoreos" with black guys with a white girl. And the little red triangle in the corner said 'More chocolate flavored cocks...' It was absurd. It's not like someone was going to pick up that box and say, 'Oh, I am not eating cookies. What has happened here?' It's just a way that corporate lawyers justified their high salaries. It was settled. A lot of companies got slammed with it and we all had to share the settlement."

Samantha: "I've got bigger boobies and I'm feeling wonderful."

Mike: "They still sore?"

Samantha: "No. I went in on Friday [for the breast enlargement]. And I've maybe taken three pain pills. And maybe a sleeping pill. And I'm not in pain at all.

"They went in and since I had bigger boobs before, I had more skin. So they did a crescent lift so that I would qualify for silicone. He just went in under the nipple and gave me 300ccs of silicone and tucked me in and firmed me up and now they look like 15-year old boobies again."

Mike: "Silicone needs to be massaged right?"

Samantha: "Yes. I've got so many emails from people offering to massage them."

Luke: "What do you mean your breasts used to be bigger?"

Sam: "When I was 16, I got on birth control and it made me gain weight. I went from 110 pounds to 145 in about a month and a half. So I had a big butt and big boobs. And when I got off the pill, I lost my butt and my boobs. I really wanted the more natural look. I'm not going for big boobs. I'm a little fuller than a C cup."

Mike: "Why did you want to get them done?"

Sam: "I wanted to get my boobs back. I've been contemplating for three years. I've seen all these girls who've had terrible boob jobs and complications. Then I've seen girls who've had beautiful boobs. I guess I was waiting to find the right doctor and the right time to take the time and not worry about bills.

"I've been in the business a year-and-a-half and shot so much young girl stuff it is pathetic. And I'm trying to have a different look."

Luke: "Samantha, do you think that bestiality is degrading to women?"

Sam: "Hmm, I've never been asked that before. I think it would be degrading to anybody who would do that to themselves. Not just women. Because I know men..."

Mike: "Depending on the girl, it could be degrading to the animal."

Sam: "Who says the animals wants these acts done to him?"

Luke: "How come there's such a wall of silence in the industry about the Australian Mafia?"

Sam: "It must be a well kept secret because I haven't even heard of the Australian Mafia."

Luke: "Do you think bukkake is degrading to women?"

Sam: "I think it's gross. But I don't think it is degrading. Because women can only be degraded if they're not willing to do it... As long as it is what the person himself wants, it should be fine. If somebody is into fisting, they should be allowed to show that and do that."

Luke: "Samantha, do you have a sister?"

Sam: "Yes, I have a younger sister."

Luke: "How would you feel about her starring in a bukkake video?"

Sam: "I don't even subject her to this side. She already has two children. I would actually be pissed. I don't think I would let her do it. Because she's very naive. She's a young 19 year old. She's never been anywhere but the town she's lived in. So when I brought her and her son out here to live with me for a while, I kept this whole thing separated from her. Because even though she's had a child, she's not mentally ready for this. I think porno is a whole mental thing that people need to prepare for."

Luke: "Do you think a 500 man gangbang is degrading?"

Sam: "No."

Luke: "What about if it was your mother?"

Sam: "If my mom wanted to do it, I would be like, 'go ahead mom.' My mom's had a pretty wild life and she probably would do it."

Luke: "Would you be willing to help out on set and carry the towels and wipe her off?"

Sam: "I would be the lube girl. I would be right there holding her hand. 'Come on mom, one more grunt.' My mom doesn't really know that I do this end of it. I don't know how she would react to porno."

Luke: "Samantha, I have a friend who would pay you $3000 for one hour to have sex with him."

Sam: "That's funny. I don't swing that way... It would be different if I wasn't married and just a girl in this business to make money. My work is my work...and that is totally different."

Luke: "Sam, if I suggested to my female friends that they do porn, they would think that I had insulted them."

Sam: "And most women will."

Mike: "I don't know. I come into contact with chicks all the time who think it is totally cool. The girl I'm dating right now in South Carolina is actually proud of what I do. She's never been around the business. She just thinks it is totally cool that I have the freedom to do it. She's been involved on the crew and it has totally changed her mind about what porn is and what the people are like.

"Nowadays people don't have the same view of porn that they had ten years ago."

Sam: "There are people who truly think like this Bryan Sullivan guy. I have been on airplanes with people who found out that I do adult stuff and have wanted to change seats. There are people who will be totally nice to me until they find out what I do - and then treat me like s---. It happens because there's this close minded - oh, all porn girls are these strung out poor girls that need money. That don't have any other job that they can do..."

Mike: "Everybody who is insecure needs somebody to look down on."

Luke: "That's why we have you Mike. So all us insecure people can look down on you."

Mike: "Be my guest. Look down on me. I'm having the f---ing time of my life."

Sam: "I'm a 22 year old stoner...and I am having the best time of my life. I can do what I want when I want to do it. I've got money saved. I have regular income. I'm not living in a little studio apartment scraping to get by eating TV dinners because I am trying to go to school.

"I still have all my abilities from my 9-5 job. I type on my web site regularly. I know more about web site stuff now than I have ever known before. Most of the girls who have web sites do their own stuff."

Luke: "Why do you think my female friends find the suggestion that they do porn so insulting?"

Mike: "Because of the way you say it."

Sam: "Women are different because they are so insecure about their bodies. Women look at porno differently than men do. Before I got into porn, I looked at porn differently than I do now. I thought, 'ohmigod, why do I want to watch some fake stuff?' I think there's a little voice in the back of their head saying it is something bad."

Mike: "It's all in the approach. Do you know how many girls that I've approached in bars and various places, 'Hey, if you ever want work in this business, call me.' And I've gotten a lot of girls to shoot for me that way... I've never had one be mad at me. More likely, they're flattered."

Sam: "Me too... Some women just don't have the self confidence to think that they can. They think they're competing with 20-year olds... They don't realize that older women can be sexy. Anybody can be sexy at any age. It's all about how comfortable you are with your body.

"I haven't been to church since I was 12 years old. As long as you believe what you believe in your heart, you don't have to go to church and remind yourself of it."

Mike: "Exactly. I don't know people who go to porn stores and I don't knock people who go to church."

Luke: "Do you look forward to bringing your daughter to work day?"

Sam: "Me? I don't have any children. I don't plan to have children. I was talking to my husband about that, if we do have children, would I explain to them what I did? And at this point in my life, I'm mixed on it. I don't really know if I would tell my kids. It's none of their business to know how mommy got where she's at."

Luke: "Samantha, do you believe that Jesus Christ is God?"

Samantha: "Whoa. Do I believe that Jesus Christ is God? My husband just looked over, 'What the f--- are you guys talking about?' I believe there is a God but I don't know if I believe that Jesus Christ is God. Is he the Messiah? I don't know. I haven't read my Bible in a while. I remember the Ten Commandments..."

Luke: "How many of the Ten Commandments can you name?"

Sam: "Thou shalt not steal. Thou shalt not commit adultery. Thou shalt not covet another God before me. I forgot all the other ones. Thou shalt not commit murder, steal, have more than one wife, beat your kid..."

Mike: "Those aren't Ten Commandments. I could probably rattle them all off. All but two of them start with 'Thou Shalt Not.' The two that don't are 'Remember the Sabbath Day to keep it holy' and "Honor thy mother and father.' Thou shalt not steal. Thou shalt not commit adultery. Thou shalt not covet. Thou shalt not put any God before me. How many did I get?"

Luke: "Six."

Mike: "There's more than that. I know them all if I sit down and think about it. But why does it matter?"

Luke: "Samantha, when was the last time someone asked you these questions?"

Sam: "When I was twelve..."

Luke: "Do you believe in the Oral Law?"

Sam: "I don't know what that is."

Luke: "Mike, do you believe in the Oral Torah?"

Mike: "I don't know anything about it...I think that mixing porn and religion is not a good idea."

Sam: "I think it went all wrong when I shoved the Bible up my ass. That's what set us on the wrong foot."

Luke: "Did you do that in one of your movies?"

Sam: "No. Everybody keeps asking me that. I've never shoved anything up my ass..."

Luke: "If you were to shove any book up your anus, which one would you choose?"

Sam: "Deuteronomy."

Mike South Lies

Goddess writes: What in the world is wrong with Mike www.mikesouth.com South? I just finished listening to your radio show, and when you asked him if he believed in the Oral Law, he said he "didn't know that much about it" to be capable of making a decision one way or the other. THAT IS A BOLD FACED LIE!! He told me that he LIVES by the Oral Law. Wait....we ARE talking about the same Oral Law, right? The one that says, "Thou shalt let me blast my load on your face," right?

MarcRich> I have known a lot of very bright women in my life, and not a one of them would ever take even the suggestion that they do porn as anything other than a profound insult to their humanity.

MarcRich> I met one bright porner, an asian woman who permitted a mass-copulation of which she was the focus to be the focal point of a doc about her. I also talked to the producer. The consensus was that she was profoundly f---ed in the head.

JESUSLOVESME> I think clubjenna should be a physical action, not a noun.

MarcRich> Does not shaving, immediately before sex on a set, increase the likelyhood that disease will be spread during coitus, given the nicks and cuts that occur with shaving?

JMT> jimmyd is busying videotaping a future Wal-Mart cashier fellating a stranger

MarcRich> what sort of gear does one wear when picking up semen soaked towels on a porn shoot?

JMT>Farrell Timlake, do the kids get sullen and resentful when asked to help out with the editing and box cover art?

MarcRich> Raise your kids right , Farrel, and they will be utterly ashamed of what you do for a living

dipper> the age is never right to tell your kids you f--- strangers for a living.

dipper> kids never want to think about mommy and daddy having sex. how on earth do you tell them that you f--- to make money for the food on the table

dipper> How did I get that idea? Listen to him. Read the remarks on Netpond and the message boards. Everybody wants a buck or we wouldn't have AOL after CEN. Spam was not necessary. Business will come with good content and original websites. Spamming is not needed. CEN is getting what they deserve.

JMT> bobjones, when you graduate, do you plan to apply for a position in the l-keford.com litigation department?

HymentRoth> Bob, that would be a great way to get your feet wet in first amendment law

bobjones> Most of it is this annoying man [Mike South] with the southern accent.

bobjones> It sounds like the moron you always end up sitting next to at airport bars in the midwest when you're changing planes.

HymentRoth> Luke associates with high-I.Q. jewish women who, as a rule, do NOT do porn

HymentRoth> Hey, Mike, try that in any bar on the Upper West Side of Manhattan and let us all know how that works out for you

HymenRoth> I still don't understand how any man would be cool with letting his yong wife have sex with other men, with or without money changing hands. It is contrarty to the natural order of things

Lynne> Not that I was beautiful and young, but my husband didn't have a problem with me having sex with other men

bobjones> Luke: My male married friends, like most of my male unmarried friends, can find a new woman in short order. Bluntly put, we don't need to put up with that s---.

l-keford> I look forward to the day when adultery, pornography and pederasty is no longer stigmatized

bobjones> Lynne: You'd be amazed what kids today can do. When I was 18, 18 yo girls were novices. Today's 18 yo girls lost their gag reflex at age 14.

HymenRoth> It is more likely that a man will agree to have sex with a goat than he will permit his wife to have sex with other men

HymenRoth> Bob, porners are pimps at heart, forever trying to convince their targets that f---ing for money is a normal, socially acceptable and popular activity.

l-keford> I talked to the rabbi of my new shul this morning, for the first time in six months. Scary. I told him I'm a freelance writer on entertainment and organized crime.

bobjones> Actually, come to think of it, I bet you'd have a shot at getting into CU journalism school without an undergraduate degree, and being entirely honest about what you do.

Al Goldstein Opines On Best Sex Magazines

Al Goldstein writes on AVN.com: I could always go glossy and try to look more like better mags such as Hustler or Penthouse, but that would mean subverting my natural Kike's resistance to spending money on anything but myself. Speaking of Hustler and Penthouse, they are the cream of the men's field crop; especially Penthouse. When he dies, Bob Guccione will be remembered as one of the greatest artists of the 20th Century. His appreciation of female beauty puts even mine to shame, and since he's an Italian romanticist and not a cheap Jew, he doesn't mind spending every last dime to make the pages of his magazine drip with top-quality sex. And the videos he puts out with Private are simply the most jerkable porn in history.

Larry Flynt is another story. He stole my lawyer, my editor and my content, and put out a glossy magazine that mimicked my lowbrow sense of taste and humor. As a result, Hustler is a wildly successful, very horny magazine that has made Flynt a multi-millionaire with a skyscraper in downtown L.A. I respect Larry and consider him a friend, even though he is an angry, bullet-riddled, golden-wheelchair-bound cripple who is so jealous of my creativity that he would rather see me go bankrupt before offering to help SCREW survive.

Chaim Amalek Embargoes Luke, Writes QuasarmanRants.com

The real Chaim Amalek says: Congratulations! Whether you intended to or not, you have stumbled upon the great interior truth of Chaim Amalek, if only by playing with his great name.

You see, the Mamelukes (I assume that this, and not "Mamalook", is what you meant to spell) originally were a caste of slaves in service to the Turkish Sultan as warriors. In time, they came to seize power for themselves in Egypt, and actually held the Egyptian throne from the thirteenth to the early sixteenth centuries. Turning slaves into rulers - that is the mission of Chaim Amalek.

I am feared by those in power in pornography (and that would NOT be you) because they know that just as the Mameluke slaves seized power in Egypt, so too shall the gentile slave girls who are in bondage within this industry arise, under the wise and firm leadership of Chaim Amalek, to seize power from Italian mafioso pimps and the Jewish money men who abuse them. There is much more, of course.

The name of our caste (yes, I am a descendant of the Mamelukes, who like me were a swarthy people) "MameLuke" is phonetically equivalent to "Maim Luke". And that is what I have done to this potential threat to my plans. Oh, not physically, of course, but clearly in the spiritual sense.

For many months I have fed Luke endless copy to copy and publish. Why? To atrophy journalistic muscles that might otherwise have developed into a Schvartzeneggarian Gotterdammerung for Chaim Amalek's plans for revolution. But enough of that for now. Wait, watch, see, and learn.

PS Note to those (Luke, this means you) who would crib this for their own websites, permission denied! Consider this to be equivalent to the secret code employed for just this purpose. The embargo continues.

Rumdar writes: "Quasarman says: This new format is no fun...." Wrong Q-man...The new format was working great because it required much less of you and much more of us. Left on your own, what do you come up with? Porn stars scrotums. What will tomorrow's copy contain? The inside (maybe outside) scoop on porn stars hemorrhoids? Listen to the great Amalek Mr.G. He made Luke the major force he is today. Return to the format of stealing, borrowing and reader input. You may be able to boost your hits from 10 to 30 a day. Go take a Xanax and think it over. No, leave the Xanax alone. That is your problem. I suggest a hit of acid.

A Poem For Mr Hollywood Jew

Misha writes:

There was once a fellow, signed "Mr Hollywood Jew,"
Who wrote obscene E-mails,
'Cause that's all he could do.

He'd call people names,
Make unfounded claims,
Such was the game of Now infamous "Mr. Hollywood Jew"

So, good people what's there to do
With effete "Mr. Hollywood Jew;"
Who answers his own begging questions
While intelligent readers spew?

Why of course!

Why not? He can rant with his "porn again" friends...

At Mr. Ford's "Pornography Zoo!"

MrHollywoodJew responds: Bad poetry merits no response.

On MrHollywoodJew As Faux Literary Critic

Misha writes: How is it that "bad poetry merits no response" -- So, Mr. Hollywood Jew is an expert on poesis now? -- but when it comes to bad portrayals of women in pornographic situations he has much to say in support of pornography?

Besides, notice his contradiction again. When Mr. Hollywood Jew says that "bad poetry merits no response" then is he not doing just that, in other words, responding to the "bad poetry?" Oy, that I should have to read his contradictions again! But you know what, I agree with Mr Hollywood Jew. The poem was a bad poem. Had a poor rhyme scheme and was simplistic. But I kept it simplistic so Mr. Hollywood Jew would understand it. Here's an even simpler poem:

More to say MHJ?
Or will you simply go away?

MrHollywoodJew writes: Could Misha be Chaim? We haven't heard from Chaim in a while and some elements of Misha's diatribes sound hauntingly similar to those of the Pornovitcher Rebbe. In any case, tell Misha I am not (as he insinuates) the sort of man who keeps a running tabulaion of his "conquests." I quit doing that years ago.

PS: If Misha hates porn so much, what's he doing scanning a porn site all day AND keeping up a running correspondence with its host and regular contributors? Shouldn't he be off "saving souls" on the streetcorner or in the Amazon or someplace? THAT'S the only sort of "Missionary Position" he'd ever enjoy!

PPS: No, I won't go away but I just might return with a different screen name, like you do, Misha or Chaim or whomever. And, darn you, you made me have to go look up "effette" in the dictionary (it said "exhausted by childbirth." Uh huh).

Australia Smashes India In Test Cricket

From News.com.au: MUMBAI: Adam Gilchrist smashed the fastest Test century by an Australian since 1921 yesterday to rescue Australia in the first Test at Wankhede Stadium.

Australia's Porsche in the No 7 garage changed the speed of the game with an amazing 122 off 112 balls to all but break India's spirit. Gilchrist's second Test century came off just 84 balls and he went from 50 to 100 in 29 deliveries.

Gilchrist and Matthew Hayden (119 off 172 balls) played the best innings of their careers at a time when Australia needed them most for a rescue mission of stunning force.

The duo, displaying the type of storming aggression Australia loves to see from its sporting heroes, enabled their side to surge from the quicksand of 5-99 to the high ground of 6-296 as if propelled by a coiled spring.

If the partnership had come in a one-day game it would have been labelled something special – to do it on a turning wicket against a team on the boil makes it one of the most stunning unions witnessed in recent Test history. After scoring a staggering 159 in the middle session, Australia had galloped to 8-329 at tea, making India's innings of 176, which had looked commanding in the first session, look like the weany burger it was.

The duo raised their centuries in successive overs and embraced like old war mates being reunited when Hayden joined his team-mate in three figures. Hayden gave himself the sign of the cross, kissed the crest on his helmet and raised his bat and gloves to the rooms in triumph as Gilchrist had done the over before.

Jack T. Chick - The Thinking Man's Prophet

The first time the Lord destroyed the wicked by flood. The second time shall be by fire. Porners are you so blind that you cannot see that the Battle of Armageddon is at hand? Israel is in mortal peril as prophesied in the Holy Bible. As the Beast marshals his demonic forces against the land of Zion the Lord prepares for his triumphant second coming. Porners are you ready? Are you right with God? Click here: The Only Hope

Note: A brand new Chick tract debuts on March 1st.

TabithaStevens.com Ripoff

Bill writes on RAME: I was a member for 2 months and decided to cancel. The site was okay, just $20 is too much to pay since I didn't go there that much. Anyway I emailed the only email address I could find on the site and told them to cancel the membership. I get no response so I log in to check if it still works, and sure enough they haven't cancelled it. So I send another message...nothing. I get my bank statement and they charged me $15 4 or 5 times in one month. I still have yet to receive an explanation or for that matter any response of any kind. So if you're a Tabitha Stevens fan like me, don't join her site.

Porn star Tabitha Stevens replies: "Hi, Luke, Tabitha here. Regarding the customer on RAME, I just became aware of this yesterday. I'm having my webmaster look into it and take care of him as soon as possible. I'm sorry that he didn't like the site; since I've recently been signed exclusively with Jill Kelly I probably haven't spent as much time on the site as I would have liked to but there are great improvements on the way including a live-cam free to members and private pay-per-view shows. Again, sorry for the inconvenience to him and to my other fans that may have encountered this problem. Oh and it's only $15/month to be a member but I'll credit him $20."

Johnathan writes: My understanding is that this is a predominant problem in the "adult web" industry. Unscrupulous operators just keep charging the mark's credit card, sometimes counting on a merchant name like "Underage Cum-sucking Sows, Inc." on the statement carrying enough embarrassment potential to keep the customer from complaining to the bank.

James writes: I had this problem with PornStarsUncensored.com. (No offense to Nick Jordan). I send them an e-mail every few days for 2 months and they never cancelled my subscription. I finally e-mailed every address I could find on the site and someone finally got back in touch with me. He explained what happened and told me I could get however much I was owed back, but I didn't wanna fool with them anymore so I said screw it. It is an ok site though.

BigCat writes on RAME: Call your credit card company. Tell them you subscribed for 2 months and cancelled. Give them the dates you contacted them and let them know that you used the only contact method provided by the company. Tell them that you are denying the charge past that point.

Without a signed receipt the company has to refund you the outstanding charges or the credit card company charges them back If they get too many charge backs they are fined or have their merchant account closed.

Here's the key: Call the CC company. They don't care that you subscribed to a porn site, it's none of their business.

Be honest, if you try and charge back all of the charges (including the first 2) the .com can pull up access records and your case is shot.

Be specific that the company continued to charge your card after you cancelled your membership. The company does not need a written request to cancel your membership unless you signed and returned a contract.

Be as specific as you can about when and how you attempted to contact them. Hopefully you kept copies of the e-mails you sent. Credit card laws are very specific about protecting the card user. It's up to the .com to prove that you wanted the service continued, or at all.

Banner Ad Stopper

Juno First writes: Luke your banner ads are extremely powerful, even the free and mighty www.webwasher.com application cannot stop one of them from appearing! (stops all the others though) - I also have the special address w/o banner ads - I ALWAYS click all the links and let the pages load to keep the bills paid up! You may wanna use pop-up stopper when porning -- free at www.panicware.com -- this util stops ALL pop-ups on IE.

Watching a porno (seeing if i have another Maxell blank with defects) and reading the piece on you in Wired Magazine 'most hated man in porn' Luke, the 'what ever happened to' stuff no longer works! What gives....?

Can you look into the 80s star 'Danielle' - saw her on Death of A Porn Queen on PBS and she looked a little out of it. Also an idea -

how about a 'when i met...' the vibe you got when pressing flesh w/porn stars - since most readers never will get close to them...

The CBC documentary dude who did a feature that included you expressed regret that he did not focus more on you and your tortured soul - did you see this follow-up?

Luke says: The vibe that I get when I meet a porn star is a feeling in my head that I would really really love to have this female fellate me. Sometimes I just want to lie naked on her breasts and cry. Sometimes I want to penetrate them through different orifices. Sometimes I want to marry them and take them away from porno. Others I want to convert to Judaism.

These Guys Never Learn - Let Ms. Jameson Speak

Misha writes: Dear Mr. Ford, I will try to comment as briefly as I can to all the E-mail I received from you. To "Mr. Hollywood Jew:" You don't get it do you? Ad hominems don't prove an argument. The same comment holds true for "Fred." So, you guys might want to reconsider your approach. Doesn't work. Fred's rejoinder is simply a rehash of what Fred has been saying all along except that he ignores the definition of lust I provided. Fred, you've tried. Didn't work. Those who know how to think will see through you points easily. No need for me to do again what has previously been done. Your just one of those folks who likes his porn and nothing reasonable will dissuade you from it. You are -- for now -- a lost cause.

But here's my question to Fred: Fred is Ms. Swift's boyfriend supposed to be me? That's what you wrote at what was the upper portion of Mr. Ford's column. If so, then, according to your later "analysis" the boyfriend must be a Russian immigrant who converted from Judaism, is an engineer or programmer, doesn't like sports, must have a high I.Q. and doesn't have a girlfriend. But how can he be boyfriend to Ms. Swift while simultaneously not be a boyfriend? You have contradicted yourself again. You don't make sense, Fred.

And for your questions about who I am, well, doesn't matter. For I could believe I am Napoleon -- and be entirely insane on that point -- and yet still be right on porn being immoral and lust (lasciviousness) being wrong. After all, even people with degenerate, indeed, "insane" tastes are capable of doing perfectly average "normal" things like using the keyboard to type their nonsensical arguments. In fact, Fred does quite well on the keyboard.

I notice that from time to time, Mr. Ford appears to get comments from porn stars. I wonder if they really think it is moral. Perhaps current porn performers like Ms. Jameson -- I see that she is mentioned as such on l-keford.com -- and others might tell us what they honestly think. So, if you are a porn performer, why do you think porn is moral? It would be more informing to hear what current porn performers think than to read Fred and Mr. Hollywood Jew's ad hominems and flawed arguments.

Luke Gets Mail

Ian writes: Luke, is there any evidence that there has been an increased supply of male performers to the porn industry since Viagra became available? If inability to get wood on demand has restricted the number of male porn actors in the past, surely the greater certainty of performance that comes from taking Viagra will have attracted a number of men to the business who would have been reluctant to expose themselves to humiliation in the past, however much they were anxious to f--- female porn stars for money?

Mark writes: Luke, Have you ever seen Nicole Moore in person? This girl is the antithesis of porn. She looks like she is pushing 60, her skin is leathery and marked and her face . . .I don’t even know where to begin. I couldn’t believe people pay this old hag to take her clothes off. Some people know when to quit and some people don’t. Honestly how old is she? Will someone get a copy of her ID!! I’m willing to bet she is pushing 50 maybe even 55.

Crab Time

Renaissance man writes on NVBrothels.com: Is there a way to conceal a bad case of crabs so that you can still party in the brothels?

What writes: "You don't need to conceal them. Simply shave one half of your pubic hair off. Soak the other half in lighter fluid and light it on fire. Take a rather large framing hammer and crush the little bugs when they flee the fire. After they are all crushed, go to the brothel free of critters."

Kissy writes: Yep, and we'll all point him out and snicker at him as he walks through the parlor and then we call ahead to the other houses to get him blacklisted. Or we draw a big cootie on his forehead in red ink.

Webmaster writes: I doubt that this question is a serious one, but I will take it seriously because millions of Americans get crabs every year.

You should never party in a Nevada brothel if you have a case of crabs or any other STD. You will probably be caught during the dc, and it is inconsiderate to the ladies. Crabs is another name for pubic lice. Treatment is similar other types of lice. Apply a lotion and/or shampoo to the infected areas and wash out.

Lotions are available over the counter. Higher strength medications are available by prescription. Pick out the lice and eggs with a comb. Wash all clothing and bed linen. Apply the lotion again a few days later.

Claudia Chase Visits New York City, Seeks Friends

Hello Guys, I am happy to introduce Claudia Chase to all of you and let you know that she will be in town for a few days.For rate information please kindly call (888)822-2020 and our staff will be more than happy to assist you. Best, Elana for www.Exotica-2000 Related link: exotica-2000.com

Lynn LeMay's Brave New World

Lynn LeMay writes on BigDoggie.net: Spreading my wings. Lynn Lemay can be reached directly at...... lynnlemay1@aol.com. This is my permanent contact address. Save it and pass it on for all those "ISO." Hope that those who have already contacted me are happy with their picture. Looking forward to developing new and satisfying relationships.

Luke asks: But what about that no-show in New York Lynn?

Yankeefan writes: Hey, what do you expect for only $1500 per hour - professionalism ? Which coincidentally is about how much I was out of pocket traveling to NYC to see her. Flight from DC, cabs, hotel, meals etc. I also emailed her and pointed this out. Shock ! No reply.

Marlowe reassures on BigDoggie.net: I don't know what happened with you guys last time with her. Maybe she got nervous at the last minute. I do know I have corresponded with her recently and she seems very cool and enthusiastic. I can't see her till I go to LA, but I am seriously thinking of it. Maybe she's serious when she says "a whole new day". Just my opinion.

Yankeefan replies: Well I spoke to her too. You're right, she seemed cool. Then after I made a huge effort and spent a lot of $$ to get to her, she just completely, and without any prior or post explanation, Blew Me Off. Caveat Emptor.

Holly Body Working In Silverlake, CA

Dreambuilder writes on BigDoggie.net: Holly is working at Silverlake today. E-mail me if you need contact info westcoastrod@earthlink.net

Stephanie Swift Has Competition

Lucia writes: HI LUKE, PLEASE PUBLISH THIS.MAKE SURE STEPHANIE SWIFT READS THIS OVER THE PAST MONTHS I HAVE BEEN WRITING ON YOUR WEBSITE ABOUT STEPHANIE SWIFT.

MY NAME IS LUCIA. I AM THE ONE WHO IS REALLY GOOD FRIENDS WITH STEPHANIE SWIFT'S BOYFRIEND LIKE I SAID BEFORE. I HAVE GOTTEN EVEN CLOSER TO HIM AND HER AND I CAN TELL YOU ANYTHING YOU WOULD LIKE TO KNOW. FOR EXAMPLE DID YOU KNOW STEPHANIE SWIFT DOES DRUGS? EXTASCY, MARIJUANA,SHROOMZ, ACID, ETC? OH, I'VE BEEN AROUND HER I CAN TELL YOU SO MUCH. SHE THINKS I AM HER FRIEND. I HAVE BEEN HANGING AROUND HER AND HER BOYFRIEND. WHAT I REALLY WANT IS HER BOYFRIEND.

I AM IN LOVE WITH STEPHANIE SWIFT'S BOYFRIEND AND I WILL DO WHATEVER I HAVE TO DO TO STEAL HIM FROM HER. YOU SEE, HE IS JUST USING HER SAVING THE MONEY SHE GIVES HIM TO TAKE CARE OF ME. STEPHEN AND I ARE BEST FRIENDS, HE TELLS ME EVERYTHING. IT'S OK IF STEPHANIE READS THIS. SHE WON'T BELIEVE THAT IT'S ME. SHE WON'T BELIEVE THAT I WOULD WRITE THIS. SHE'LL THINK ITS SOMEONE ELSE. AND I WILL CONVINCE HER THAT ITS NOT ME. I'LL JUST SAY "NO" "I WOULD NEVER DO THAT TO YOU GUYS" I WOULD'NT AND DIDN'T. SO LUKE ASK ME QUESTIONS WRITE ALL YOU WANT.

I have a picture of her dog and her boyfriend that i stole from her apartment. I'm going to try to take one of them together but she might notice. I don't want her to notice.

Jenna Jameson writes: Hi Luke, I just wanted to make a comment about the Stephanie Swift situation. I am VERY good friends with Stephanie, and I know for a fact she and Stephen are very much in love. Stephen never leaves her side andsupports her in anything she decides to do. As long as I've known Stephanie (She comes to my house in AZ once evry two months to stay with me and relax) she NEVER does drugs. And to address this irritating little chick writing you, GROW UP! Get your own man! Do you really think you can compete with Steph? I don't think so... Step back into the real world and move on. I will make sure I call Steph and get the REAL story!

Brian writes: Wow, how hard can it be for Stepanie to figure out who this mystery informant is? The girl says she hangs around with them, real hard to figure out.

Fred writes Luke:

1. Do you suppose Lucia is for real, or is she (he) just making this up? Any independent confirmation or independent information?

2. Tell Lucia that she can have Swift's boyfriend if I get Swift.

3. Is there any truth to the rumor that Stephanie's boyfriend is actually Misha?

Groovetillyoudrop writes: HI LUKE, PLEASE PUBLISH THIS.MAKE SURE LUCIA READS THIS OVER THE PAST MONTHS I HAVE BEEN WRITING ON YOUR WEBSITE ABOUT STEPHANIE SWIFT'S BOYFRIEND'S FRIEND LUCIA.

MY NAME IS DICK VAN PATTEN. I AM THE ONE WHO IS REALLY GOOD FRIENDS WITH STEPHANIE SWIFT'S BOYFRIEND'S FRIEND LUCIA, LIKE I SAID BEFORE. I HAVE GOTTEN EVEN CLOSER TO HER AND AND I CAN TELL YOU ANYTHING YOU WOULD LIKE TO KNOW. FOR EXAMPLE DID YOU KNOW LUCIA HAS 7 DIFFERENT FAVORITE TYPES OF CHEESE? GOUDA, CHEDDAR, JACK, SWISS, GOAT, MOZZARELLA, AND AMERICAN? OH, I'VE BEEN AROUND HER I CAN TELL YOU SO MUCH. SHE THINKS I AM HER FRIEND. I HAVE BEEN HANGING AROUND HER. WHAT I REALLY WANT IS HER CHEESE COLLECTION.

I AM IN LOVE WITH STEPHANIE SWIFT'S BOYFRIEND'S FRIEND LUCIA AND I WILL DO WHATEVER I HAVE TO DO TO STEAL HER AWAY FROM HER CHEESE. YOU SEE, THE CHEESE IS JUST USING HER BECAUSE OF THE RISING COST OF DAIRY. TONY DANZA AND I ARE BEST FRIENDS, HE TELLS ME EVERYTHING. IT'S OK IF TONY READS THIS. HE WON'T BELIEVE THAT IT'S ME. HE WON'T BELIEVE THAT I WOULD WRITE THIS. HE'LL THINK ITS SOMEONE ELSE. AND I WILL CONVINCE HER THAT ITS NOT ME. I'LL JUST SAY "NO, I WOULD NEVER DO THAT TO YOU GUYS" I WOULD'NT AND DIDN'T. SO LUKE ASK ME QUESTIONS WRITE ALL YOU WANT.

I have a picture of Lucia, Tony Danza, and her cheese that i stole from her apartment. I'm going to try to take one of them together but she might notice. I don't want her to notice.

Groovetilyoudrop: Don't you ever just feel like ridiculing the idiotic people that sometimes email your site?
Groovetilyoudrop: I used to work as an assistant on a TV show, but it got cancelled and production folded up very recently, so now I am looking for work
Groovetilyoudrop: not quite sure what I want to do
Luzdedos1: have you ever considered doing escort work?
Groovetilyoudrop: lol
Groovetilyoudrop: why?
Luzdedos1: I know a man who will pay you $1000 to sleep with him
Groovetilyoudrop: Rob Black?
Groovetilyoudrop: sorry I'm straight
Luzdedos1: ok $1500
Groovetilyoudrop: even for a million, no
Groovetilyoudrop: wait, it's Tod Hunter, isn't it
Groovetilyoudrop: i always knew it--only one d in the name equals fairy
Groovetilyoudrop: I'll be a l-keford.com "junior reporter"
Groovetilyoudrop: and then I'll go poke Al Goldstein in the belly and ask him why he has all his interns write his articles for him Groovetilyoudrop: quick question--have you ever met Chaim Amalek in person? Does he get a cut of your revenue for wiritng so much? :)
Luzdedos1: i have met him 2x and he gets nada
Groovetilyoudrop: you should negotiate so that he gets free naked playtime with Jim DiGiorgio
Groovetilyoudrop: Maybe if you give Chaim naked playtime with Jim DiGiorgio, he will write even more so he can get more compensation.

How Do Net Porners Make Profits?

There are a few major ways that companies make money legitimately. They can acquire a rent through ownership of a scarce productive resource such as land or intellectual property. They can acquire a rent through lowered information costs due to marketing. Or they can engage in arbitrage.

Lynne> more likely they create a scarcity...or a demand for something themselves

Or they can acquire a regulatory rent such as a law degree, brokerage license, etc. No, you can' t create scarcity without an arbitrage opportunity that eliminates the scarcity. This is the point I'm trying to make, Luke.

If you look at the non-net porn business, very few of them are actually making economic profits, profits in excess of 15% on their capital investment. The ones that do make more than that, the bigger names, have marketing rents. None of the net porn places do; they have no word of mouth, they have no reputations. They go out of their way to split into multiple sites, avoiding the development of reputations. Economically, they should not be making any money.

If they are making an economic profit, there's something wrong.

(Arbitrage is the riskless exploitation of price differences in a good between disconnected markets, thus eliminating the price difference and profiting greatly.)

The question to be asking is: Who is actually making money, and how are they making it? Because by all rights, they shouldn't be. All goods are subject to the same supply and demand rules. Porn costs almost nothing to make. This is why extreme associates is not making money. You can make a porn movie for, I think luke did it for under $10,000.

Consequently, a lot of porn gets made, the girls don't get paid very much, and the profit per picture is very low. The profit per picture is very low (in most cases I doubt there even is an economic profit) because there is so much competition because the product can be made so easily.

The big money in internet porn was made 1996-97, since then there have been a flood of people into internet porn, killing profits. This is precisely the point. It is cheap to make; someone made money, so the market got flooded (arbitrage occurred, actually) and the profits dissipated. The same process should be occurring on the Internet. Apparently, IS occurring on the internet (the intense competition and high prices paid to the free webmasters)

Lynne> The real profit in porn was made not only when it was scarce, but also when it was illegal sure,

but that's not the point. The point I'm trying to make is that economically, now that it is legal, the big web programs shouldn't be making any money. Or at least, not more than 15% annual return on their capital investment. If that consumer base exists (and it does to whatever extent) than competition will come in and compete on price and quality until economic profit reaches 15% + any acquired rents. If they are making more than that, if they're really making the money they claim to be making...

Lynne> they're making it the good old fashioned way....lying to uncle sam, for one
Lynne> cheating employees on their retirement plans...whatever
Lynne> In porn, we practice the rule of three...whatever someone says they've made, divide it by three for the real figure

Luke: do you get what I'm saying? he says that it is a closeknit industry that does not share its secrets, it's in how they use the traffic, market and bill that's a claim on an intellectual property rent, a trade secret. and they're always using the latest technology.

But they should still be competing each other into low profitability; and others should still be able to enter the market. the technology is available to anyone who buys it; its cheap technology relative to the claimed revenues

The raw traffic is probably extraordinary; every male college student for 30 minutes a night

Advertising (payments to free webmasters) appears to be their largest expense they have that expense now. they could have paid it before to the free local sex presses, etc.

Lynne> And selling tapes through the mail was always legally risky

Lynne> Luke has a claim on his site that the distributors were fixing prices and making a fortune. Because they were mobsters. Which I've told him a million times isn't true -- there was never any "price-fixing." Not that he listens to me...

Did you see Harley Raine in Dirty Trash 13?

We all want to know how to get in TOUCH with Harley Raine, Did you see her in Dirty Trash 13?

LA Exotics Ripoff

Jeremy writes: Luke, I just read the guys story about getting scammed by LA Exotics, and I had the exact same thing happen, so put this in big bold letters. LA EXOTICS ARE NOTHING BUT A RIPOFF. However there is a number for porn star Busty Brittany, and that is legit, although expensive, at least you get the real deal.

Luke asks: How come there are so few escort agencies with integrity?

Good People, Luke Has A Question

If I were to suggest to any of my female friends that they do porn, they would slap me and be highly offended. What does this mean? Mike South says that many of the women he hangs out with are honored by the suggestion. What does this mean? Does it suggest that Mike's friends are not Jewish and do not belong to the cognitive elite?

Frank writes: I'd be repulsed at the thought of married men letting their wives swing. I am aware of one marriage where the man openly engaged in relationships with teenage boys and his wife seemed to find it fun(ny).

Fred writes: I have never asked that question. I think one ex-girlfriend would have allowed me to videotape our having sex. I have no idea whether she would have permitted me to videotape her with other men. I'm absolutely sure that she would not permit the videotape to be made public in any way, shape or form. (I did not videotape our playing.)

I know one man who puts up with his wife f---ing other men, but I don't quite think it's by his choice. She's spent time at nudist camps, so she has no qualms about being seen naked. She's allowed herself to be photographed naked, but only from the neck down (i.e. not showing her face). So I don't think she'd permit herself to be videotaped f---ing, at least if it were to be shown in public.

I sorta think most women would say no f---ing way if the video in question would ever be made public. I think about 20-30% would permit their boyfriend/spouse to videotape their sex if it were for solely for their own viewing.

I sorta think only about 2-3% of women would ever permit videos of themselves having sex to be sold to the public.

I think if a man asked his wife or girlfriend to pose for a porno video, that would cause about 50-60% of women to think ill of their significant other.

Luke replies: Yeah, but you're avoiding the class thing. Women of the middle and upper class are much much less likely to engage in what is generally regarded as the low class behavior of sex work.

Fred replies: I completely agree with you that it is class dependent. The first woman I mention is my age, and is a fairly high manager in a biotech start-up. Obviously, her professional standing is very important to her, and there is no way she'd ever let it get out that she did such a thing. It would completely kill her credibility in the business world.

The other woman is currently a house wife...middle class. She obviously would not want her friends, etc. to know what she's up to.

I think if a woman thinks her life is on some sort of trajectory that's going to put herself in a managerial position in a company, or a respected position in a profession, she's not going to destroy her own credibility ahead of time (if she has a brain in her head). If a woman does not think she'll ever get into such a position, she might think, "what the hell."

Also, I think women in their late teens/early twenties might not be thinking very clearly, so she might permit herself to be videotaped screwing. But by and large, I think you're right. Class matters. All of this reminds me of the Rodney Dangerfield movie, "Back to School". There's a scene where Dangerfield is asking out Sally Kellerman.

R: Are you free on Monday?
S: Oh, I'm sorry--I have class that evening.
R: What about Tuesday?
S: Oh, I'm sorry--I have class on Tuesday evening also.
R: Well, why don't you call me some time when you have no class.

I think, by the way, that I would be less likely to encounter the sort of folks who would be willing to be videotaped while screwing. I think one would have to go trawling in different waters, so to speak.

Luke says: I would like all my middle and upper class readers who belong to the cognitive elite to ask their female peers if they've ever considered performing in pornographic videos. Also, please ask your married male friends about how they feel on their upper class wives sleeping with other men? I want to know if this is a class thing.

Lynne chides: Women of the middle and upper class are much less likely to have the financial need to engage in what is generally regarded as the low class behavior or sex work, although occasionally they get rebellious and do it just to piss off their families.

Despite my upper middle class origins and my membership in the cognitive elite, I had a dysfunctional family who never were supportive emotionally, and who withdrew financial support from me before I could graduate high school. It's hard to maintain one's status in the middle or upper class without a supportive family, regardless of one's ability to cognate!

As so many porners have noted, porn becomes an extended family for those who have none of their own. I craved acceptance and liked sex and found my porn career very satisfying for many years.

But not to insult the working class woman --- plenty of working class women would never get involved in the sex business. It isn't just a class issue -- it takes a peculiar sort of self-image to wanna f--- for money when it's such a disreputable way to make a living....

Rumdar writes: >Women of the middle and upper class are much much less likely to engage in what is generally regarded as the low class behavior of sex work.

Not if they are young and develop a taste for drugs. Drugs cross the so called class structures you are alluding to. There is no telling where a girl (woman) will end up or what she will do once she is into the drug culture. As I teacher I see lots of f---ed up middle class kids. There are no upper, middle and lower classes when it comes to sex, drugs and rock n' roll.

Legion writes: Here we go again. I really have to question your ability to think clearly sometimes, Luke. Socio-economic climate has zip to do with a girl's behavior. Ultimately, her hormones override he so-called "good up-bringing". I live in a very well to do area, and I can tell you from personal experience if these parents only knew how their children acted they would have heart attacks. Of the four girls I've managed to video tape during sex, three were from wealthy backgrounds. Chalk it up to rebelliousness and boredom. My personal feeling is that it doesn't matter what side of the tracks the girl is from, what really matters is how comfortable the guy with the camera makes her feel.

Steve Neece writes: Luke,you write that middle & upper class women are less likely to engage in sex work.True.They have far less economic incentive to do so. Sex work is commercial and the huge majority-99%- would do other non sex work if it paid as much.

On the other hand,swingers tend to be middle and upper class.They are able to enjoy recreational sex because they have the time and money to do so.This is especially true if you travel to conventions.Time & money that middle class families don't have.There are few swingers in porn .It is business to them.how many active swingers are active in porn?Nina Hartley says 10% but I doubt it is near that high.Someone who videotapes a swing party for commercial reasons is not a swinger.

Though swingers politically support porn most that I know feel it is ridiculous and totally unrealistic,not to mention repressively sexist. Swinging is a lifestyle,porn is a profession.It would be interesting to find out how many performers have little or no sex drive off camrera(or on).I knew one in the 80's that was hyped as a nympho who admitted to me she was sexually dysfunctional. Don't believe the hype.

Jenna Jameson With Tommy Lee?

JT writes: Luke, I'm a BIG Jenna Jameson fan. I got back to Sydney from LA today after a two-week business trip. While at LAX waiting to depart, I swear to God, I thought I saw Tommy Lee (Pamela Anderson's ex) with Jenna Jameson. Could this be true? They were trying to be low key but they couldn't keep their hands off each other. It was fairly obvious what was going down. They both looked like they had been partying hard too. Out of curiosity, I've been scanning porn gossip articles, but as yet haven't scene anything mentioning it. However, I did come across an archived picture of Tommy Lee visiting Jenna Jameson during one of her shows at www.talkingblue.com. Have you heard anything? I hope its not true because I think Tommy Lee is bad news.

Jenna replies: Wasn't me... Haven't seen Tommy in a long time...

Groove writes: Luke, I'm a BIG Nici Sterling fan. I got back to LA from SF today after a two-week business trip. While at LAX waiting for luggage, I swear to God, I thought I saw Eddie from Frasier (Lassie's ex) with Nici Sterling. Could this be true? They were trying to be low key but they couldn't keep their hands off each other. It was fairly obvious what was going down. Tongues were wagging and a definite dry-hump was happening. They both looked like they had been partying hard too. Out of curiosity, I've been scanning porn gossip articles, but as yet haven't scene anything mentioning it. However, I did come across an archived picture of Eddie visiting Nici Sterling during one of her shows at CrazyHorse in San Francisco. Have you heard anything? I hope its not true because I think Eddie is bad news.

Zoe Quitting Porn?

XXX writes: I hear Zoe is leaving porn moving back east. I called her and a woman said she doesn't live here anymore.

Biggies Boycott Black?

XXX writes: The most asked question at the big budget feature companies these days (Vivid, VCA, Wicked, etc) is have you worked for Extreme Associates? If so you are relegated to low end gonzo stuff, if you get anything. I hear that Extreme is now .5 Million in the red and Rob's daddy has said no more...

Summa Pornologica

Misha writes: Dear Mr. Ford, My interlocutor, Fred, implies that I have risen to the "bait" he has provided. As it is no longer a matter of serious enquiry, I will have to suspend me comments to Fred. Playing the baiting game with a porn enthusiast who isn't serious doesn't interest me. So, there is no need to send me Fred's comments. To me, at least, the point was never to be entertaining nor to score "points" with displays of name calling. I was engaged in a serious online dialogue to discover the merits or demerits of porn, lust (lasciviousness), and offer a better approach to life. Not a "right winged" approach nor a "nut case" approach. (I do not side with those who use Christianity as a fraudulent marketing tool/pyramid scheme.)

I have no axe to grind except one and that is to get people to stop using porn and supporting pornographers and to see if help can be given to those who wish to get away from porn.

So, if the readers of this E-mail are tired of porn and their lives in porn and think that there must be a better way than giving in to lascivious desires but have not found it yet, well, there is. It's found in the Gospels. It means finding Christians to help.

Now, I have done some research. It may not be exactly correct but it seems that there have been some porn performers who have gotten out of porn and become Christians. I hope some of those who have been involved come forward and tell others why they got out of porn and why they became Christians. I think it would be a big help to readers and particularly to those still within the clutches of porn. There are others who are "sitting on the fence" in that albeit they attend Church, believe in Christ but are not yet able to let go of porn." It would be helpful if they told why they still hang on to porn as a means of making a living. Certainly they don't think porn is morally acceptable from a Christian point of view.

And as for "Mr. Hollywood Jew" and Fred well, I am sorry you cannot get beyond your fanaticism for porn. It's a shame. Maybe one day you look back and see how you have wasted your time and, by extension, helped waste the lives of others by promoting lust (lasciviousness) and porn. It's sad that you don't know how to love a woman without seeing her as simply a vehicle to satisfy yourself. Ladies, avoid guys like Fred and "Mr. Hollywood Jew." There are far healthier men in the world with views that are based upon love and kindness and not just "getting off" or keeping a running count of their "conquests." Remember Ladies: A "porn user" is a just a euphemism for "born loser."

Fred, Get Over Porn Addiction

Misha writes: Dear Mr. Ford, One other thought, I found the following URL while searching on the Internet. It has a host of sites listed that can help people addicted to viewing porn and those with sexual addiction problems. Perhaps someone will find it useful. It won't hurt them to at least take a look. The web address is here.

Porn Watching Can Be Hazardous To Your Thinking

Misha writes: Dear Mr. Ford, Okay, class is back in session. I see that Fred can't learn but others may be able to. So, I will handle Fred's diatribe and be done with him. It appears evident -- but I am not certain -- that Fred is just writing for the sake of writing. He is incapable of comprehending the argument. After this, however, I am done with Fred. Fred's comments are quotes and mine are preceded by the word "Answer."

"Misha started out this nonsense with a broad attack on lust."

Answer: Fred, one could argue the exact opposite: It is your comments that are nonsense.

"I then pointed out that there would be no procreation without lust. Misha then argued that this was wrong. Animals don't lust, and people could procreate with artificial insemination."

Answer: Don't forget that people can procreate without lust. Call it desire for holy union. Lust, in the sense I am using the word, is a synonym for lasciviousness. Call it love when one is worried about the good of the other and will actually go so far as to sacrifice themselves completely for the good of the other. Lust doesn't encapsulate that definition.

So, Fred, make sure you take the time to be honest enough to give my argument rather than take things either out of context or in half measure. Don't be argumentatively dishonest in your presentations.

"I then pointed out that: a) animals do in fact lust, and this is readily apparent if you watch them f---."

Answer: No, again, Fred. What you see isn't lust. It's instinct. Besides how do you know what's going on inside the animal. Your just an observer. You make an epistemological leap that only those who won't make a proper distinction make. By the way, don't use the "F" word when writing. It makes you appear as if you are low class unless you use it as an acronym in the older sense: "For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge."

"b) even artificial insemination requires lust--the sperm is collected by males who jerk off."

Answer: Similar answer to above. You don't know what is going on inside the head of all males involved in artificial insemination unless you have talked to all of them. You, again, make an epistemological leap. Don't you ever learn? Guess not.

"c) males cannot f--- a female and impregnate without lust."

Answer: Fred likes the "F" word. What's the matter Fred? Vocabulary problems? How about "intercourse" or "sexual congress?" And, again, Fred draws conclusions either based upon his few randy friends or himself. Hey, Fred, really, men can impregnate women without lust (lasciviousness). Too bad you cannot.

"d) all of this is readily apparent to any male who has lived on planet earth for some time."

Answer: Really, when did you do your poll Fred? That's p-o-ll and not p-o-l-e. You don't really know and you just generalize to buttress your circuitous reasoning.

"Misha then backtracked, and said that he was using a special definition of lust, and pointed me to some nutty web site he dug up."

Answer: Hmm, "nutty web site?" Go back and look at the site. It's the site for a standard dictionary. Readers: Note how Fred goes for the ad hominems when he has nothing of import to say.

"Just for the record, according to definition 1 of "lust" in the Random House Dictionary of the English Language (unabridged edition), lust is "sexual desire or appetite." Without that, there is no procreation."

Answer: Fred, again, I gave you a definition of lust that is perfectly acceptable. You dismissed it to buttress your point of view. I even went so far as to be very specific about what I meant by lust and made the further distinction of the kind of sexual intercourse based on lasciviousness. You just ignored it. This is what we call a "straw man" argument. You prop up a false claim that I never made to knock it down so to appear correct. Don't ignore secondary definitions just to support your poverty stricken point.

"I did a quick sample of friends, and asked, "do you think a male could impregnate a female without lust." The answer was invariably "of course not." Apparently, Misha is the only person on planet earth who can perform this amazing feat."

Answer: You should have asked your friends if they could impregnate a woman without being lustful if the definition of lust implied lascivious carnal desire. If they then told you that they couldn't do so then you know you have degenerates as friends and they are best avoided. You say that I am "apparently" the only one to be able to perform this "amazing" feat. It's amazing to you Fred but then you and other porn fans are among the amazed. Really, there are others. Yu just need a better circle of friends.

"Misha--how old are you? Have you ever had sex with a human female? Were you able to perform this feat without lust?"

Answer: Fred, to answer the last question I have to answer the first and, Fred, unlike you I don't share that kind of information with randy fellows like yourself.

"Quite frankly, your claims fall into the same category as someone claiming to have seen pigs fly. When receiving such claims, one is entitled to conclude that the claimant is a nut case. Your claims fall into the same category. Thus, the situation we find ourselves in is like this."

Answer: Fred makes his conclusion without stating his premises first so to set the tone for that which is to come. Let's see if Fred, after his bombastic diatribe makes sense...

"If I interview an inmate from a lunatic asylum, and the inmate claims to be Napoleon, and I conclude he's crazy, is that an ad hominem attack? Perhaps. Is it an inaccurate attack? No. Does calling the person crazy prove that he's wrong? No. But it's already proven that he's wrong."

Answer: If the inmate says he is Napoleon and he is not then all it proves is he doesn't know who he is. Further diagnosis awaits. Fred, you just can't help yourself from jumping to generalizations without further evidence can you? You argue like a neophyte.

"Once I decide that the inmate is crazy, which are the best uses of my time: a) arguing with him and trying to prove to him that he's not Napoleon? or b) trying to investigate the cause or other aspects of the delusion? or c) walking away and ignoring him while he blathers on about how he beat the Russians at Borodino, and how he should be allowed to leave St. Helena? Misha, you would pick choice (a)."

Answer: Well, Fred, you ask me to make a choice and then you make it for me. Thanks for being fair and unbiased. Here's my actual choice: None of the above. Why so? Because I wouldn't find myself in that situation hypothetical or not. But even if I did find myself in the situation it would depend upon my goal in querying him or not. Again, you make a "straw man" argument.

You must like answering your own nonsense for I never said that I should argue with a lunatic... unless, of course, I seem to be doing so now with you. Are you a lunatic Fred? Maybe the readers are starting to wonder?

"I have no doubt that 99.9999% of the population would simply ignore you. (Apparently, only myself and the guy who signs his name "Hollywood Jew" have taken the bait.) So there you have it, sir."

Answer: Fred, at last you show what a pitiful mind you have. Too much porn Fred. You have "no doubt?" Either you are incapable of doubt or you have taken a poll of "99.9999%" of the population. Really, you have the time for this? Your better than the national census folks. You really are reaching and simply are too blinded by ignorance and your own blather to carry on with.

Fred, it just none of your business. You can share your business if you wish. You just appear like a silly fellow. Take a nap Fred, maybe you will feel better.

One thing IS for certain. You don't know what you are talking about. Unless you are a psychiatrist or a psychologist you are not qualified to make the silly general faux diagnosis that I am "nut." Indeed, this is not the forum no the way to make a proper diagnosis. And Fred, nobody has told you what line of work I am in now have they. Did you get your crystal ball out and figure it out that way? Fred, give it a rest.

Summary: Fred is a very poor thinker. Here's a syllogism for you: Major premise: Watching too much porn interferes with one's ability to think. Minor premise: Fred watches too much porn. Conclusion: Watching too much porn interferes with Fred's ability to think. (Readers:This is a valid syllogism --"validity" and "truth" are not the same thing in formal logic -- but it might not be true if one can simultaneously think well and watch porn. I don't think Fred can do both. His rants demonstrate this.

So too with my other interlocutor who calls himself "Mr. Hollywood Jew." I think it's better that Fred pick up his New Testament and watch no porn and follow an admonition therein: "Come let us reason together."

Fred, when are you going to start to reason rather than babble about that which you neither understand nor can articulate? Ah, by the time Fred learns how to reason I may be senile and ready for the grave.

Fred writes: Well, I'm taking a short break between tasks at work, so I thought I'd take Misha to task for some of the nonsense he's spouting.

Just by way of background, Misha started out by saying lust is evil and contrary to God's plan, and I pointed out that this was wrong, lust is necessary to, and part and parcel with the human condition. People could not procreate without lust. Lust is par for the course for animals as well as people.

Misha, without any proof, alleges that animals do not experience lust. Animals have instincts, and lust is not an instinct. Had Misha bothered to look in the dictionary, he would have discovered that the first definition of instinct is thus: "an inborn pattern of activity and response common to a given biological stock." By the definition of the word instinct as used in the English language (as opposed to Misha's secret definitions of words), lust is an instinct.

Misha's assertion to the contrary is simply a made-up nonexistent fact, or the use of a made-up definition of words. Misha then said, well, people could procreate without lust, e.g. by artificial insemination. I pointed out that this was nonsense--even artificial insemination requires lust, i.e. when the sperm sample is collected. Misha then back pedaled violently, saying that he doesn't really mean lust as set forth in the dictionary--he has a special definition of lust that he found on a website somewhere, and it means lascivious. (If this was really what he meant, he would not have bothered raising his nonsense argument about artificial insemination. So Misha is being dishonest.)

Misha asserts that when he was using the term lust, he defined lust to mean lasciviousness. Well, according to the Random House Dictionary of the English Language, the first definition of lascivious is "inclined to lustfulness." Lustfulness is "full of or motivated by lust", and "lust" is "sexual desire or appetite." So Misha's second definition of lust does not get him out of the soup. His argument is still wrong.

At this stage of the debate, Misha now says he has a brand new definition of lust. His new definition of lust is a desire for "holy union". That's nice. But males still cannot f--- and impregnate without sexual appetite. Misha then makes the rather amazing supposition that when males donate sperm, they manage to jerk off without sexual appetite. Misha accuses me of jumping to conclusions in supposing that they think lustful thoughts when they jerk off.

Well, I suppose they could be thinking about their income taxes. They could be thinking about the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle. They could be thinking about whether there really is life on other planets. But I don't think so. I think that when they jerk off, they think lustful thoughts. Sperm banks stock pornography because that is one of the means by which they facilitate sample collection. They don't stock copies of Scientific American to help the donors.

This is perhaps the point that best highlights how Misha really is divorced from human life. Misha imagines that the folks who jerk off into sample containers at sperm banks do so without lust. He imagines that when spouses f--- and impregnate, they do so without lust. Misha is not able to identify any human male who has accomplished this amazing feat. Misha does not deny that he's never had sex. Misha's entire understanding of the sexual process is completely divorced from any experience whatsoever.

Misha--is there any scientific periodical you can cite that shows that males have sex and impregnate without lust? One scientific study? One periodical? Anything? Have you personally impregnated a woman without lust? Do you know of anyone who has impregnated a woman without lust? Who? Evidence, Misha. Where's the evidence?

Director Michael Raven writes: The "F" word? Are you afraid to say it? Misha incorrectly states that "f---" originates from the Puritanical acronym "For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge". This is generally considered to be myth among linguists. A look into the Oxford English Dictionary for the origin of 'f---', we see that it has its root in the old Germanic from the verb "focken" (sp) meaning :to poke, punch or penetrate.

"f---" is as valid as Misha's suggestions of "sexual congress" or intercourse. Is Misha somehow offended by the word f---? I can't imagine a word offending anyone and as long as it's used in a grammatically sound manner it remains as valid an expression as any other word in any other language. Perhaps Misha dislikes what the word "f---" represents.

And by the way Misha, when was the last time you read the Song of Soloman? King Soloman doesn't sound like a man who believed one could "procreate" without lust.

Fred writes about Misha: I think he is obsessed and horrified by his own sexuality, and he tries to reject it. I think he is haunted by rather dark fears. I wonder what the cause of this is? Perhaps he himself has some dark desires that terrify him. What do you think?

Luke replies: I think he's toying with us... Isn't it interesting the different ways we perceive him? It must reveal our own ways of thinking. I immediately suspect that someone like this is pulling our leg, you suspect he's nuts. I am sure he is not nuts. I am sure that he is not all the stupid things you ascribe to him... People usually describe as sick or nuts those they don't comprehend. I think he's as sane as you and I, and either pulling our leg or has a different but similarly valid values system.

Fred replies: I do not think Misha is stupid. I do think he's nuts, but I definitely don't think he's stupid. I don't think he's kidding, because of the rather frantic and angry tone of his posts. I perceive that there is definite hostility there. That's hard to fake, even in written posts. (Although I do believe that the little poem he wrote about Mr. Hollywood Jew could cause a reasonable person to believe that Misha is not really for real.) I do not think Misha is insane, at least not in any legal sense, and probably not in any clinical sense. For example, I don't think he's clinically delusional. (Note however that there is a difference between insane and mentally disturbed.)

But I do believe this-- a) He desparately adheres to a religious idiology. There is clear desparation. b) He either i) lacks much in the way of sexuality; ii) vigorously denies his own sexuality (e.g. because of some sort of fear or discomfort). He may be battling something that repulses him. c) He would rather abandon reason and what any human being could perceive with their own senses than his religious ideology.

In many ways, Misha is like Pierce. Is Pierce insane? A psychiatrist would probably not diagnose Pierce as insane. Pierce is so fixated on the particular conclusions that he draws, that he's willing to ignore data, bend data, or otherwise depart from rational thought processes to arrive at the conclusions he wants. I don't think Misha is as malevolent as Pierce, but he does share certain basic personality flaws with Pierce. I don't think there is any piece of data, proof, or argument that could cause him to acknowledge a flaw in his belief system. Pierce is a fanatic. Misha is a fanatic. Don't you think there is common etiology here?

Luke replies: Yes, there may be similarities between Pierce and Misha. But while Pierce is evil, Misha sounds like a good and decent person. I don't see him having sexual hangups. He simply holds to what have been normative sexual values until the 1960s, when lower class values and behaviors penetrated the middle and upper classes. I think Dr. Pierce is a sharp guy with clear and dangerous values that make as much sense as any other value system (absent of transcendent referee).