Wednesday, February 21st, 2001

Porn Star Coffee House Shocker

BrandyAlx1: Someone is getting an unexpected coffee date with Brandy Alexandre tonight. This guy has sent me snail and email at least once a year for the past 10 years and last night I responded for the first time. He sounds really nice and i know where he will be this evening. I'll be dropping by. ;)
BrandyAlx1: Mostly I just want to scope on him and make sure he's not a freak, but if he happens to notice me, it will be kismet.
BrandyAlx1: Gee, Luke, I came home and have all these emails from guys who seem to want to keep me approsed of their movements. You don't think they think I'd run to some public place for some clandestine encounter with a fantasy, do you? ;)

How to Good-Bye Depression: If You Constrict Anus 100 Times Everyday. Malarkey? or Effective Way?

I think constricting anus 100 times and denting navel 100 times in succession everyday is effective to good-bye depression and take back youth. You can do so at a boring meeting or in a subway. I have known a 70-year-old man who has practiced it for 20 years. As a result, he has a good complexion and has grown 20 years younger. His eyes sparkle. He is full of vigor, happiness and joy. He has neither complained nor born a grudge under any circumstance. Furthermore, he can make #### three times in succession without drawing out.

In addition, he also can have burned a strong, beautiful fire within his abdomen. It can burn out the dirty stickiness of his body, release his immaterial fiber or third attention, which has been confined to his stickiness. Then, he can shoot out his immaterial fiber or third attention to an object, concentrate on it and attain happy lucky feeling through the success of concentration.

If you don't know concentration, which gives you peculiar pleasure, your life looks like hell.

Vngg writes on Amazon.com: I was a repressed, degenerate sinner with a three-hundred-dollar-a-day Woolite habit until the magic, talking fish I caught one day in the Gowanus Canal ordered me to go out and purchase this book. Since then, I've turned my life around completely, and as the loving husband of Maria and the devoted father of twin baby boys Zack and Mack, my digestion has never been better, my stools have never been firmer, and my kundalini serpent has never been so obedient! Buy this book, do the exercises -- you won't regret it. It's almost like Funkadelic's famous dictum reversed -- FREE YOUR AZZ AND YOUR MIND WILL FOLLOW...

Cockwhallopers

XXX writes: Dear Luke, News has just filtered out of the latest line in the Loretta Sterling series of fetish videos. The series has been tentaveily entitled "Cockwallopers".The gist of the series is as follows.

A naked homosexual "actor" of sado-masochistic tendencies squats over the centre-line of a table tennis table,in place of the more usual net. His penis and scrotum dangle free. At each end of the table are two naked hard faced, overweight, fat-assed, fat-titted black women with nothing but contempt for whitey in general and gays in particular. The game of "cockwalloping" is played by the two black women by whacking the gay's scrotum back and forth between each other, every time the gay yelps a point is scored. A bout of cockwalloping lasts for 5 minutes, with the gay ending up with a red raw and blue scrotum. Apparently in the recent test video, the gay's scrotum resembled a rather large watermelon in both colour and size at the end of his bout,this being regarded as a major turn-on amongst the S and M bath house crowd.

The strange fact is, that there is no shortage of volunteers for the cockwalloping.The depravity of the American public and gays in particular never ceases to amaze me.

Channel Nine Porn Segment

BrandyAlx1: There was just a new segment on Channel 9 that had a few comments from Kim Chambers and Lylie Ireland. It was about the new administration and the effect it may have on porn, especially internet porn.

BrandyAlx1: John Weston said that the feds are most likely to focus on small and free web sites that don't adhere to recordkeeping rules, model releases and age requirement, or common sense. The real target may be sites that don't let you leave with a thousand popups, automatically desktop changes, and other things that often require you to reboot.

BrandyAlx1: The girls said it comes down to parenting skills. Parents need to watch what their kids are up to. Companies shouldn't make it so difficult for legitimate users to access their sites, warnings should be enough that an involve parent would stop their kid from proceeding.

British Censorship

Ian writes: I must emphasise that hard porn videos have NOT been legally available on sale in England until the third quarter of 2000, following the failure of the BBFC to maintain their former censorship rules in the face of contrary decisions by the Video Review Committee and the House of Lords. I understand that hard core images in magazines may have been tolerated for a while even before this, though only informally (by tacit police decisions in some areas to turn a blind eye) and NEVER in ordinary 'sweetshops/newsagents'. Individual countries in the EU maintain their own censorship laws, and the (partial) removal of trade barriers among member nations has not affected this. It is interesting that XXX mentions 'the Gold family of pornographers' as likely to be responsible for the distribution of hard core magazines in the UK. B

y coincidence I am currently reading the autobiography of Ralph Gold (the younger of the two Gold brothers), entitled 'Good as Gold' and published in 1997. In it he mentions his disgust at hard core pornography, contrasting it with the softer variety whose distribution has helped to make his considerable fortune. The Gold family own the 'Ann Summers' chain of sex shops, and doubtless have taken advantage of the easing of video censorship in England, but I doubt very much they took the lead in distributing hard core while it was still illegal. In his book Ralph Gold makes very clear his abhorrence of getting on the wrong side of the law and possibly going to prison (as his father did on more than one occasion).

Incidentally, David Sullivan (mentioned pejoratively by XXX in passing) is a colleague of the Golds, in that they are all directors of Birmingham Football Club, a successful 1st Division club in the Football League. Sullivan, who publishes softcore porn newspapers, The Sport and The Sunday Sport, was recently quoted as saying he was fed up of looking at naked girls and hankered after publishing a 'straight' daily newspaper. XXX also says that the English public was recently treated, FOR THE FIRST TIME, to the sight of the erect phallus, oral sex and actual penetration. There was, actually, a period in the 1970s (I remember it well), when it WAS possible to see that kind of thing in magazines, sold in ordinary shops, and also to see hardcore films in so-called cinema clubs. It was a time when the police vice squad in London were working hand in glove with pornographers. After a few years, however, there was a clampdown, a number of police officers were imprisoned and the obscenity laws were fully enforced again.

Luke On Lovebytes 9AM

With Mike South, I appeared on the Bob Berkowitz show Lovebytes at 9AM PST on Eyada.com to discuss the Cambria List.

Listen here to the discussion.

Golden Showers and Jeannie Pepper

Brian writes: Luke, There is a web site you should probably check out. It is called www.kewlandkinky.com They have some Golden Showers videos. One of them is called "100% Waterproof". One of the images features Black porno actress Jeannie Pepper. Here is the link for you to check out: http://www.kewlandkinky.com/piss/hpw.htm Do you talk about golden showers or watersports in your book "History of X"? How come golden shower pictures or videos are considered obscene in the United States and elsewhere except in Europe, especially in Germany? What do you know about Jeannie Pepper's career in porn? I am definitely interested in getting a copy of your book. One thing is for sure, Penthouse is a lot more explicit than what it was. Penetration and cum shots galore in it. Is it more explicit than Hustler now?

Luke says: There's been a deplorable lack of scholarship on water sports. Where's the research? Where are the experts? Where's the beef?

Fred writes: Dear Luke-- I agree with you completely--there is a deplorable lack of scholarship on this subject. In particular, I would like to know its philosophical underpinnings. Would you consider it to be a gestalt phenomeonon? Is it an outgrowth of critical studies? Can we say that it is related to the collapse of Marxism, and an outgrowth of confusion on the left? Were there any papers at last year's world pornography conference on the subject? Please let me know. I feel that I am cast adrift from my philosophical anchor, and I need l-keford.com to set me straight.

Samantha Sterlyng Gets Breast Job

Samantha Sterlyng writes: I go in on Friday the 23rd at 11:00 a.m. to get my boobs done. I am going to have a free chat with FREE CAM for everyone for one last chat with my natural boobs. Please stop by and say Hi. It is only for one hour so make sure to come at the right time. It is going to be on February 21 at 7 p.m. pacific standard time. If you have any troubles logging in then email me and we will handle it. I have my email open when chatting just in case there are any troubles. I am so excited about tomorrow so I hope to see you there...

The Bosom Dialogues

Jane: Hi natural boobs, how's it going?
Left natural boob
(LNB): Well, Jane, I'm kinda freaked out, Samantha's gonna put us under the knife!
Jane: I heard, and that's why I'm here. Have you tried to talk her out if it?
LNB: Yes, but she just won't listen!
Right Natural Boob (RNB): You know we have never gotten in her way, you know hassled her at all...
LNB: yeah, we are really cute I think, and we don't droop or bounce around uncomfortably, you know we stay put!
RNB: yeah she doesn't even need to wear a bra if she doesn't want to, what complete freedom she has! You know I have heard rumors...
Jane: Yes, what kind of rumors?
RNB: Well, that a lot of women with large breasts are really not that happy to have them! Sometimes, they even have them reduced they are so unhappy!! They have to always wear a bra, that kind of stuff.
Jane: why don't you just put you nipples down and say NO?
LNB: We've tried!!!! She just won't listen!!!! She thinks if we are bigger and fake looking she will make more money! And she thinks she'll look better. I am really worried that we are going to look like buttocks instead of cute boobs!
RNB: Yeah, I don't want to look like an ASS!!! Oh I am so stressed, she's gonna fill us up with plastic baggies full of stuff! YUCK!
LNB: Yes, it's like she's asking us to share our space with two roommates we haven't even met!
RNB: It's not fair! Jane, why doesn't she love us the way we are? We are getting a complex!
Jane: I don't know! It's sad, I mean you two look fine to me. Natural, normal, healthy. I would be happy to have a pair of breasts like you! I think maybe she has bought into some notion that bigger is better, you know, quantity over quality. You know, I bet there isn't a man out there that would complain about your size. In fact it would be nice for some of those men to tell Samantha that. You gals look great, really!
RNB/LNB: You think?
Jane: Yes, I just hope that you will still be you once she removes them, you know? Eventually she will. People are getting sick of this fake boob stuff. Soon, the natural breast will be a rare and beautiful thing.
LNB: Well, I hope so too. Thanks, Jane.
RNB: Yes, thanks Jane for giving us the chance to tell our side of the story.
Jane: Good luck, gals!
RNB/LNB: BYE!!!

Satyric writes: It's not too late to re-consider getting implants Samantha. I hope this is not something that others have pushed you into like I've heard said about and by other porn babes who have gotten implants. If this is something that you truly want to do,well good luck with everything.But this porn fan thinks your breasts look terrific as they are now.Nothing is finer than all natural.Again the best of luck...

Mark writes: Luke, Who the f--- cares if that hillbilly whore is getting a new set of cans? That’s not news!! Let me guess when her suitcase pimps goes out to get another box of douche bags, is that news? Samantha get a f---ing life and do something productive with your pathetic life!!

LA County Supes Disband Porn Panel

The Board of Supervisors voted 3-2 Tuesday to disband the Commission on Obscenity and Pornography. The advisory panel started in 1964 but has met just four times since 1991.

Supervisor said the last meeting in 1995 drew only five of the 15 unpaid commissioners.

``It does nothing and it's a waste of county resources,'' said Supervisor Zev Yaroslavsky, who voted for the panel's demise.

Los Angeles Police Chief Bernard C. Parks, county Sheriff Lee Baca and District Attorney Steve Cooley wrote letters to the supervisors in support of the panel.

``Disbanding the commission would signal that the county is no longer concerned about its reputation as the pornography capital of the world,'' Cooley wrote.

Luke Gets Mail

Arch Stanton writes: Hi Luke. Not to worry about competition from Gene Ross' site. All he posts these days is ridiculous rants from some serial killer punk named Brian Sullivan. And promos for upcoming Extreme vids. The site went downhill fast. Looks like he had his fifteen minutes.

Kids Rally Against Porn In Utah

Satyric writes: Thanks for the good laugh Luke.I really got a big kick out of reading about the Utah youth rally against porn.Besides the hilarious definitions of what they consider to be porn,there was the comment by Frank Mylar, a former assistant Utah attorney general,"I would rather have my child smoke a pack a day than get hooked on pornography,".I wonder what he considers "hooked on porno"...But regardless he must be hooked on moron pills or something.No wonder he lost in his election.Maybe if enough liberty loving folks in Utah who are against the big brother Nazi state stand up against despotic types like Mylar they won't get their freedom of choice taken away.Don't let em get away with it!Next thing you know pigs like this will be breaking down your door in the name of "morality and decency".Just like jackbooted Nazi pigs.Don't even let em get started on what they really want to do.You don't tell me as a consenting adult what I can read or view and I will give you the same courtesy period.Don't give the phony "do-gooders" an inch,EVER!

Scott writes: I could not help but be sickened by that article. These are children we're talking about. They have no idea what they want in life yet. If they've made a decision to be "anti porn", it was not their own. An adult pushed them twords that decision. If we should be listening to these children's whims, then why are there huge efforts to restrict the driving privledges of children? Clearly, they're not old enough to make informed decisions yet. Thinking back on my own sad life, I really wasn't interested in porn until I was about 21. My interests in porn really took off once I met my life partner. We enjoy watching porn together, what is wrong with that? Neither of us is single, neither of us is going to rape anyone.

As a child I said I would NEVER do a lot of things, wearing contact lens comes to mind. Through the years I learned the error of my childish ways and became an adult somewhere along the line. My point here is these children are far too young to have made this decision on their own.

This is ALL about gathering money so people who would be otherwise unemployable can have jobs fighting some menace to society. Look at the drug war.. If drugs were legalized tommorow, where would all those bottom feeding, low IQ morons get jobs? Imagine how many great jobs you could create by outlawing porn...

Help With Anti-Porn Editorial

Sohe writes: Hello Mr Ford, I was wondering if there are any well written editorials on the web that discuss the negativity of pornography(of stars and society), but have no religeous reasoning behind them. Anything closely resembling that would be very helpful.

Truths Guardian Mandingo X

Truths Guardian writes: Hi Mr Ford, Keeping up with your site for a while now. I recently chatted with Mandingo (The Adult Film Star) in person and I was asking him a few questions on the Mandingo X e mail. This is the piece:

"Black male performer MandingoX writes:

Mr. Ford: Thank you for helping me expose smiling white devil Steve Hirsh and Vivid Video's vulgar display of bigotry and cowardice. This morning's march on Vivid was postponed due to our recent bad weather. We have, however, received tremendous support and are taking this opportunity to organize ourselves for a more efficient and powerful protest. The past few days have been spent on the phone with various media groups in the hopes of acquiring coverage, both mainstream and adult. I am pleased to announce that we have secured Fox News, Hard Copy, The LA Weekly, BET, and AVN. We are also in discussions with ABC's John Stossel for a possible Discrimination in the Adult Industry expose. Steve Hirsh may feel he has appeased us with his condescending, irresponsible, and ludicrous "apology" but he is mistaken and will now suffer the consequences of being a hate monger, a white devil. Mandingo

P.S. In their pathetic "apology," Vivid Video claims to have placed the Diviant box stickers "inadvertently" over BLACK performer Mr. Marcus. Oddly enough, it seems these stickers were "inadvertently" kept from covering the holy Vivid logo as well. Whatagal writes: I hope the Vivid protestors have secured the proper permit for a demonstration - it would be a shame to lose all that potential media coverage if the police broke it up due to a lack of permit."

The Real Mandingo adamantly states this was the first time he heard of the response on your site and is upset that someone is impersonating him on the web. The reason why I am writing is to point out that some people who write are probably not who they say.

So, to mandingo X, I understand the cause but it should be under another name and using a performer's name is very questionalble and unethical (Especially if they are in the adult business).

Last but not least, the issue of "The List". The list, for all intensive purposes, was designed as "advise" to certain companies on what the Good Ole Boys and Christian Coalition backed lawmakers and/or politicians would pursue in order further subdue our hedonistic ways. So "The List" was designed to keep the businesses out of the potetial "Big Brother's" eyes. The only point on the list is the wording could of been better to advise his clients. Other than poor taste of wording, the list only discloses what the idiots will go after in a court of law.

So to the Oppressors (As our Mandingo impersonater would say - let our people GO and have consentual sex. Something like that.

Black male performer Mandingo writes: Mr. Ford: I find it curious that someone who goes by an alias would accuse me of being an imposter. Who is this mysterious Truth's Guardian? I suspect it is someone who harbors a secret and detrimental agenda towards my efforts in exposing the white devils within our industry. I can see right through you Mr. Guardian. When I am through with you and your ilk, YOU WILL BE WAVING THOSE WHITE SHEETS OF YOURS IN SURRENDER! I won't be appeased. I won't be threatened. And, I will not be undermined!

Publisher Alan Miles writes: Luke: I am so f---ing tired of seeing and hearing all this sniveling crap posts by the "black men" in porn. f--- you! Get off Hirsh's butt and everyone else in the industry and do something on your own! The "poor demonized black men" is a sorry f---ing excuse for you not having the smarts or the energy to do something on your own. There are important issues facing the adult industry at the present time but it has nothing to do with race or racial bigotry. Of course, you want us to think it has something to do with you but it doesn't. We have important problems to deal with now. We have a bigoted Republican Party in charge right now, and an ultra-bigoted Attorney General, and we'll deal with that. But all this crybaby s--- from the "poor demonized black men" is nothing but a bulls--- distraction that has gotten really old over the years. If you are so f---ing smart, start your own production company [companies] and do something for yourselves. If not, shut the f--- up. The white man has been your f---ing crutch for too many years. Wake the hell up and prove yourselves to be creative or shut the f--- up!

Porn star Diana DeVoe writes: Hello Luke, My name is Diana DeVoe. My "porn ethnicity" is black, but I am in fact Hawaiian and Filipino as well. Many of you fans know who I am. You, Luke, probably do not.

I have been following this nouveau race-crusade in porn with great interest. I am glad to see it prominently featured SOMEWHERE, because it legitimizes what was thought to be mere bellyaching. However, it saddens me that I do not hear the voices of the people who CAN affect change.

All "Black" people in America are born with two conflicts; 1) Must I accept "blackness", and all the implications that will henceforth be loaded onto me by the "black community" and society at large? (i.e. "black culture"); and 2) If I accept "blackness", am I obligated to DO anything about it? (i.e. Must I serve black people first, and myself second?)

Please understand Alan (and Luke), that it is American society that has dictated the importance of our skin color and hair texture, and because of this, some of "us" deal with these conflicts our whole lives, sometimes never solving them. Of course, as we are born, we must live and eat and prosper the best we can in spite of things, but it is an insult to history to pretend that these factors do not exist. How dare you tell "us" to "get over" racial prejudice when it was common practice in parts of the U.S. a mere forty years ago?

However, MandingoX and supporters, by choosing to be an adult actor you are choosing to be in one of the most personally, financially and psychologically exploitative industries in existence. There is no union, yet we beg for more, or at least standardized, pay. There is no health coverage, yet we put ourselves at risk for various diseases each time we perform. Our performances (and the revenue they produce) may likely outlive us, but we have resigned ourselves to being famous and broke. Any idiot who can read an AVN knows that there is overt racism in adult video, but do you think that if you march, all those dudes secretly masturbating to ethnic porn (mostly white, I'm willing to bet) are going to whip their doors open, pull up their pants and march with you? You can't even do any proper market research because the primary audience (middle-aged white men) won't admit to watching porn!

Whether or not black performers agree that they owe anything to each other merely because they are black, they should certainly be able to unite for the sake of monetary rewards. If Marcus, Lexington Steele, Mark Anthony, Julian St. Jox, Jack Napier, Mandingo, Tony Eveready and Byron Long (who probably do 90% of the "ethnic" scenes) are dissatisfied with the way they are treated, they should strike, and see what happens. We all know the power of interracial video, Vivid and VCA notwithstanding (did I miss the plethora of ethnic/interracial titles they CUT?). Vivid would not be making comps of the stuff if it didn't sell. Refuse to work until your demands are met. You would set a fine example for those black female performers who are accepting cut rates, ugly males and labels like "nasty 'ho".

I hope, Luke, that you have found space to print this in its entirety. There is lots more to the story, but I wanted to address these specific points. Basically, if Vivid/Wicked/VCA et al are "them", then there needs to be an "us". If "us is tired of them white folks", then "us needs to stop bulls---ting" and pull rank. If not, we are no better than Alan described us. If anyone wants to take this up with me personally, they are invited to at diana@dianadevoe.com.

Lee Noga Returns To Luke F-rd Live

Listen to tonight's show. Read the chat here.

A porn video retailer has noticed that the volume of new releases is dramatically less than last year at this time.

> Luke: I don't know if it's a good ``sin-dicator'' but one pro-whore attorney says trollop business is down.

Devoto44: I tried to listen to your show, and engage in the accompanying chat, BUT, could not. You have my HIGHEST praise for being able to surround yourself with your "work" on a daily basis.
Luzdedos1: Why would you praise me for that?
Devoto44: It is something I could never do, nor do I desire to do
Devoto44: I think you deserve praise for being able to SHELF your morality/religous teachings and WORK
Luzdedos1: what parts of my site and teachings have particularly moved you of late?
Devoto44: None, really
Devoto44: I lost all respect for your site as a place for "teaching" when I realized that the views of Mr. Sullivan typified that of the a PORN fan
Devoto44: So little UNDERSTANDING and so little desire to learn
Devoto44: How you put up with that, I will never know, and that, LUKE, is why I praise you!

Razor Magazine Razzed

XXX writes: YYY mentioned he looks to razor magazine (sponsored by RJB Telcom and edited by Luke's old boss Craig Vasiloff) as an example of how not to do things. Because the layout is lame, the writing is worse. Maxim ripoffs are a pathetic genre of magazine overall, a passing fad.

US ISP Pleads Guilty To Hosting Child Porn

The idea that Internet Service Providers are not responsible for the content they host has taken a further, and perhaps, fatal knock after a US case which sets an important legal precedent. In a hearing before the New York State Supreme Court, BuffNet pleaded guilty to knowingly providing access to child pornography, a misdemeanour charge which carries a potential fine of $5,000.

Screwmag.com Review - Fully Limp

I signed up for Al Goldstein's Screwmag.com and found that the site moves exceedingly slowly. And I have a cable modem. I looked around for ten minutes and found that half the links don't work. And the links that do work take forever to load. The site is a ripoff. Avoid it.

Scoop From Esad

Esad (Extreme Spy At Your Disposal) writes: AVN Emperor Paul Fishbein was spotted in Las Vegas last weekend buddying up with Venetian Hotel Owner, Sheldon Adelson. This is a major coup for Fishbein as Adelson very rarely gives anyone the courtesy of his company. Word has it that Adelson's personality makes Fishbein look pleasant by comparison! Fishbein has also spoken to Wrestling Honcho, Jim Cornette about booking a West Coast Show in the near future.

The financial pressure at Extreme is causing tremendous dislike for Gene Ross and many of his co-workers do not expect him to last. The inside word is that Rob would have s--- canned him but that would be admitting failure to Fishbein and AVN, and the rest of the adult industry that Rob so admires. Next time you talk to rob or gene ask them how the purchase of their wrestling arena is coming along?

Porners In Paris

France's Hot Video magazine is hosting a large porno convention in Paris. Digital Playground's contract girl Tera Patrick is the covergirl for the convention. She appears on approximately 1200 billboards around Paris.

Page Three Girl With Shocking Hardcore Porn Past

From the Sunday People, 2/18/01:

DAVID BROWN in Mons, Belgium reports:

AN Army girl who shot to fame as a Page Three pin-up last week has a sordid secret - she is a hardcore porn star, the Sunday People can reveal today.

Melanie Cotton, 27, who hit the headlines for defying military bigwigs by posing topless in a newspaper, has appeared in a string of squalid blue videos featuring both men and women.

The 34B brunette played Miss Innocent last Monday when she appeared in her husband Keith's battledress in a national newspaper and claimed he would "go barmy" - but in fact we can reveal HE has filmed her in disgusting porn videos.

A Sunday People investigation has found that the couple are thoroughly depraved and well-known on the blue-movie circuit.

And we discovered that one of their perverted videos was made in the dingy basement of a sex shop.

Keith, a corporal in the 2nd Battalion The Light Infantry, eagerly directed as his wife had sex with THREE men - including an unknown customer who walked in off the street.

Melanie:

JOKED with her lecherous husband as he directed her debauched performances.

CASUALLY had unprotected intercourse with total strangers.

EARNED pounds 250 for her sleazy one hour 45 minute performance.

Our revelations about the couple's vile pastime will send shockwaves through the Ministry of Defence.

Melanie, whose husband has done two tours of duty in Ulster, has already been accused in Parliament - along with the first Page 3 Army girl Roberta Winterton - of bringing the Forces into contempt by appearing topless.

But the misconduct of Lance Corporal Roberta, 20 - now busted down to private - is nothing compared to that of Melanie and Keith, 30. Their lewd off-duty "hobby" could pose a security risk at the massive Supreme Headquarters Allied Powers Europe base - SHAPE - in Mons, Belgium. Corporal Keith helps guard the giant NATO command centre while his wife is a civilian worker in the warrant officers' mess and is paid by the British Army.

The couple's depraved off-duty antics leave them wide-open to blackmail.

One insider at the base said: "It's the biggest joke to see Mel behaving like butter wouldn't melt in her mouth.

"She will do almost anything sexually to make money and Keith isn' t bothered in the slightest.

Readers of The Sun had no idea of Melanie's sordid secrets when the paper splashed "Army Girl Mel Parades On Page 3" all over their front page and two further pages inside. She claimed in the paper: "Keith will probably go barmy when he sees it but it's only harmless fun. Now he's got his own topless girl...it's always been my ambition to get on Page 3. It's all good clean fun."

But in fact her and her husband's antics are nothing but filth - and bring nothing but disgrace on the British Army.

The sleazy pair - married for five years - plumbed the depths 15 months ago when they returned to their home city of Wolverhampton to make a video at the Soho Books sex shop.

Owner Gary Cook, 33, who runs the shop with manager John Nock, confessed to the Sunday People: "Melanie has made a number of adult films and Keith is no stranger to directing. Most husbands might not like the idea of their wife having sex with other menbut he doesn't mind in the slightest. In fact, he actually enjoys it.

"He was controlling the action and she was more than willing.

"Melanie knows all the positions and is desperate to make money from the sex industry.

"She makes out it is some big deal doing topless shots. But I have seen her do things that would make your hair curl. She has absolutely no inhibitions."

Gary helped Keith film the video "Wolves' Sex Shop Orgy" in the 20ft- by-18ft cellar while two of his muscular heavily-tattooed workers took part. In it, Melanie plays the part of a customer called Jenny Page who inspects marital aids, magazines and lingerie.

Dressed in black leather trousers, top and skimpy lingerie, she examines the wares before disappearing downstairs with the shop workers. Melanie peels off her clothes to reveal a black bra and lacy panties. She then plays with a giant sex toy before the trio have unprotected full intercourse. They also perform other acts too sordid to describe in a family newspaper.

At one stage a genuine male customer she'd never met before walks in and joins in without Melanie batting an eyelid. Throughout the video her husband is heard egging her on, saying: " Nice one, Mel."

Gary told the Sunday People: "The whole thing was Keith's idea. "He told me his wife was interested in making a film and that they had already made some home movies together.

"I offered him a percentage of the film sales or a one-off payment of pounds 250 cash which he took.

"The most amazing thing was, we had left the shop door open and a customer walked in.

"He was watching for about 25 minutes from the stairs and then joined in. "He did not know either Mel or Keith but she said, 'Another one. Oh, well, the more the merrier'. I couldn't believe it.

"Neither she nor Keith were bothered. If she can do that with a total stranger, goodness knows how much she puts it about. The bloke could have had Aids."

Gary has sold 20 of the videos in his shop at up to pounds 70 a time. Melanie has since appeared in several other porn films, at least one more directed by Keith. The titles include Three Way Frolics featuring a man and another girl.

One of Melanie's co-stars, Steve Norton, 27, of Wednesbury, West Midlands, said: "We did some filming with her and her husband.

"But it was a while ago and I'm not in that industry any more.

"She has gone a lot further than Page Three. I'm not in touch with her any more."

When we tried to confront Melanie and her husband at their Army semi near Mons they refused to comment. The Sunday People is making its dossier available to the Ministry of Defence.

Eddie Wedelstedt Under Fire

From the SouthBendTribune.com: SOUTH BEND--One of porn's power brokers appears to be next in line for obscenity charges promised in the next few days by the St. Joseph County prosecutor.

Statements from Prosecutor Chris Toth indicate that he is taking aim at Edward Wedelstedt, who heads Goalie Entertainment, the Denver-based company that runs the Adult Emporium in South Bend.

Depending on who's talking, the man known to friends as "Eddie" is either a career criminal or a guardian of the First Amendment.

Wedelstedt, reportedly arrested many times since the 1970s, was convicted of tax evasion in 1982 and fined $400,000. In 1991, cash and assets were seized in a series of raids conducted in seven states to satisfy a $3.35 million federal tax debt.

Confirmation of Wedelstedt's past arrests came from a former FBI agent, Bill Kelly, now an obscenity consultant to the Broward County (Fla.) Sheriff's Office.

"He's got at least a dozen arrests that I know of," Kelly said in a telephone interview. "This guy is probably, I would say, the No. 1 target for the feds."

Luke says: For the full scoop on Eddie W, read my profile of him.

Madam Regina Hall

IDM writes on RAME: I just saw a FOX news special in LA about Regina Hall being a madam of bring high price hookers from the Czech Rep. The report showed that she brought other Czech girls like Tereza Benesova (I've seen her in some Suze and Earl's softcore photo shoot) to the US as high price hooker. Currently Regina is in house arrest in LA. Anyone have more details about this?

MTV's Undressed

From the Washington Post 2/7/01:

In fact, "Undressed" is essentially a lusty teen's basest impulses realized. The conversation is vapid, the plots sophomoric, the couplings unlikely. It blatantly resembles prime time on the Spice Channel. Few characters make it through an episode without disrobing to panties or boxers. The sets are well lighted and a little flimsy, with soft guitar-filled alternative rock -- pluck-pluck-pluck -- replacing the '70s porn riff, bow-chica-bow-bow.

In the archetypal porno flick, the repairman shows up to fix the lady's VCR, and within minutes is busy "fixing" the lady herself. In "Undressed," a high school tutor agrees that for every answer her student gets right . . . why, she'll strip, of course.

Sex is the ultimate digression.

Is there skin? Oh yes -- bellybuttons and thighs and backsides. Are there beds? Oh yes -- and couches and laundry rooms and slick shower walls. Why, there are even props -- whipped cream and lingerie and battery-powered appliances. No inclination or fetish goes unexplored. Last season alone, there was sexual exploration involving dirty dice, ben-wa balls and mints. But because this is still MTV, and there are censors to oblige, the X-rated action goes on off-screen or under the sheets.

Jeremy Steele Writes About Last Night

Jeremy Steele writes: Hey Luke, Last night, I was at The Rainbow, talking business with Sal [Sodano], who's been around for years.. I might be going to Venezuela to shoot. Anyway, there weren't many people in there, but I thought for a sec it was an industry party. A few seats down was Hershal Savage with someone, Then across from me comes in Ron Jeremy and a couple of others. We all say hello. Then Chuck Zito comes in and sits in the booth next to me. I shook hands, spoke with him, asked him if he knew my psycho ex [Eden Rae], who claimed to know and have gone out with him, and be a Hell's Angel's daughter. I mentioned her real and stage name and he said he never heard of her. Then again, maybe he wouldn't say if he did. In fact, I don't even know why I claim to have known her, anymore. Earlier last night, I was looking through my profile in the star index just for kicks, and was laughing.. My life was a real comedy. I realize I was a bit nutz, then. Not that what I had said wasn't true, just that I was in a very agitated and at times debilitated state. I'm much better, now.. I think.

Chuck Zito is the Pres of Hells Angels.. A cool dude. He's been on Howard Stern. I think he's on HBO's OZ too. He was talking about that.

I spoke to Sal this morning and this government really pisses me off.. Sal's on his way to go to court because he has to pay a nearly $400.00 ticket he got for not stopping "long enough" at an red light intersection before making a right turn. On top of that, my experience has informed me that the f---ing courts tack on a 170 (on hundred and seventy) perent tax on the fine so It'll probably be $1000.00.. All for something completely innocuous. Maybe he ran over a catipillar that didn't have time to cross in time, otherwise, my addage "No Cop, No Problem" applies.. You talk about the porno biz being ruled by the mob, but let's look at who the real mob is; Our so-called hired, tax-payed servants. If he doesn't pay that fine, then the government deems him as a "criminal". I was locked up once for a traffic warrant, and in County there was caught in a big riot and one guy was killed.. I was lucky it wasn't me. I was locked up with people doing 25 years to life because I was in a park after dark making out with a chick and never paid it. How come a landlord who I won a judgment against, who still owes me 100's of dollars doesn't now owe me 1000's of dollars, and why don't they lock him up? Why does the government have the right to turn civil matters into criminal matters? Crime starts at the top, man. I know there are governments far worse, but that's no excuse for a so-called "free country" we're supposed to salute and sing to. These Godless, so called "servants" remind me that there's nothing shameful about being in the porno biz compared to working for the government or being some slave in a corporate scheme.