Thursday, September 28th, 2000

Scotty Schwartz - True Hollywood Story

This episode of the E! True Hollywood Story takes an hourlong look at the life and career of Scotty Schwartz, a child actor who went from a promising career in mainstream Hollywood films such as The Toy and A Christmas Story to porn movies. His most notorious role came in 1996, when the 28-year-old performed his first onscreen sex role in Scotty's X-Rated Adventure--an endeavor that was ultimately not a success. Following that, Schwartz had a short-lived career as a porn talent manager. Interviews include Schwartz, his father Daniel and adult-film actress Ginger Lynn Allen. Click here: E! Online - E! On Air - E! True Hollywood Story - Scotty Schwartz

Aghast writes: Of course, Scotty Schwartz will always be known to porn fans as the loser who could not get it up on film with Juli Ashton!

Adult Press Service Expanding XXX Operations Overseas--Porn Talent & Travel Bureaus To Open In Brazil, Colombia and Venezuela

The New York City-based Adult Press Service (APS) has announced it is expanding it's current domestic XXX news and photo distribution service to include fully-functional adult starlet talent agencies in several South American countries.

The move represents an ambitious extension of APS's current operations and will feature offices opening in Rio De Janeiro, Brazil; Bogota, Colombia; and Caracas, Venezuela by the end of the year.

APS's new business venture is designed to offer two exciting new services to US pornographers and photographers; Transporting new, never-shot-before young South American girls to the US to work for Los Angeles porn producers, and organizing and managing trips south-of-the-border for North American videographers and still-shooters who want to shoot lay-outs, gonzos or features overseas.

The decision to expand APS's functions beyond it's current role as the world's leading independant adult-oriented journalistic reporting group represents a marked departure from it's core photo and news gathering activities. But according to APS founder and President Marc Medoff, the opportunities presented in the South American locales were "too good to pass up."

"The main focus of what the APS does, covering the world of erotic enterintament journalistically in words and pictures to serve the needs of our several dozen magazine clients, will remain the same," says Medoff, "But with so many beautiful girls, so many exotic locations, and at such cheap prices, we felt literally compelled to create a new business model to exploit these incredible opportunities."

It was during several trips overseas in the past year to cover various foreign sex conventions, the making of several porn flicks, and shooting glamour magazine lay-outs that APS came across what Medoff describes as "nothing less than a goldmine of untouched pussy."

"Our motto is, 'We go where the sex is,' and what we found was that the sex, and the girls, was so fantastic in places like Brazil, Colombia and Venezuela, that we just had to bring these girls to the US to do porn, or bring US pornographers down there to shoot. So we finally decided to do both."

The APS office in Rio, under the local business name of the Adult XXX Brazil Service, will be the first to open on October 5th--and with little publicity Medoff says he has already been deluged with requests from US producers to go to Brazil to shoot. At the same time, the first Brazilian girl sponsered by APS in a two-week whirlwind "tour" of LA XXX directors in early September was a "smashing success."

"We brought Milena, a gorgeous black-haired perfect-assed beauty in from Rio as a test case. We charged no commissions, we made no major sales pitches--we just casually introduced her to guys like Ed Powers, Randy West, Tom Stone and others," says Medoff, "They all loved her, they all f---ed her, and they all begged us to bring in more just like her. At the end of the two weeks Milena had made more money than she had ever made before in her life, and we knew we had a successful business-in-the-making."

In fact Milena proved to be so popular that she will be returning to LA in November to make more videos along with blonde bombshell Melissa, another Rio knockout discovered during APS's last trip to Brazil. The current Adult XXX Brazil Service plan is to bring in 1-3 girls every other month from Brazil to the States, and the other months head back down to South America with porn producers who want to shoot overseas.

An advertising campaign to promote the new service will begin next month in the Adult Video News (AVN) and other adult trade and consumer magazines. "Its' going to be like a little porn underground railroad running in both directions," says Medoff, "We can bring you the girls, or you can come and pick your own, your choice."

The main attraction of such South American locales says Medoff is the massive number of young (all over 18 years-old) pretty all-natural girls that are dying to do porn--at dirt cheap rates. But the countries also offer the benefits of legalized pornography, legalized prostitution, beautiful locations, and a very weak local currency that has increased the buying power of the US dollar overseas multi-fold. In-other-words, US "tourists" can live like kings in places like Rio, Bogota and Caracas.

"Hotels, restaurants and pussy are currently at bargain-basement prices throughout South America, so the time to go is now, the currency situation is not going to stay like this forever," explains Medoff, "And even if you don't feel like working everyday while you are done there, obviously with horny young girls all over the place, and everything so inexpensive, you can have the time of your life as well. And of course, we also know where all the best brothels, strip clubs and massage parlors are as well--and which ones to avoid. Our 'service' to anyone we take to South America is all-inclusive," Medoff smiles, "You will make money, and have a blast."

While APS charged no commissions to producers for Milena, anyone wanting to shoot the next girls brought in will be charged. "We take no money from the models, and never will. But obviously we are spending a lot of money bringing them over here--airfare, visas, hotels, etc., so anyone wanting to shoot the girls will have to pay a nominal fee, just like they pay World Modeling or Pretty Girl International."

A commission schedule will be sent to producers upon request, with girls being brought to directors on a first-come, first-served basis. Similiarly trips to South America will be booked with producers in the order they sign up, with each production project priced individually based on what has to be executed.

"We think there are a lot of porn producers that would love to shoot in South America, but they are just not hooked up with talent, locations, and everything else they need to know so they don't get ripped-off," says Medoff, "We've made dozens and dozens of trips overseas, checking out girls, locations, hiring local agents, the works. We've made all the mistakes already and have learned from them. If you go to any of these countries on your own you're screwed, you go with us, and it's smooth sailing all the way."

Marc writes: Luke--thanks for posting info about the Adult XXX Brazil Service, if anyone is interested in shooting videos in South America, or using the girls we bring back each month, they can contact us at: 800-647-6864 E Mail: ALLXBrazil@aol.com

Jenna's Chat Nuked

Jenna Jameson writes: Did you here what happened last night on my chat for adultdvdtalk? Go to rant section…. It was pretty bad! Someone tried to hack my computer….Crashed everyone….

Brandy Alexandre writes: "The self-proclaimed center of the known universe speaks again. The truth is the IRC channel was taken over and participants "nuked." It's a common problem on IRC. It wasn't a hacking into Jenna's computer and the alleged hacking was not what caused people to drop off."

Jenna responds: "Do you ever shut-up Brandy? Was I talking to her? I don’t even know who this old lady is. Anyway… I was being vague because, I wasn’t sure exactly what happened only that I was told by my computer guru that someone DID hack into the computer network in my office building. So, Brandy, why don’t you stop being so nasty… Try being nice for once in your miserable life. It must eat you up inside that I’m always front page news and that no one cares about you. That’s why you feel you have to respond to anything I do or say… Because that’s the only way you, in all your ugliness, gets any attention. Well, you’ve succeeded in one thing, making me feel sorry for you. HAHAHA"

Brandy Alexandre responds: "Jenna seems to like to compare herself to me a lot. Maybe she can only feel important by comparing herself to someone who gets no press, needs no press, and isn't even in the same business as she. Under those circumstances any burp she writes for herself can look like incredible press coverage and "front page news." She must be really jealous of me that I don't have to live off my body. I make logical statements and she replies with illogical personal attacks. And she shouldn't be surprised when people respond to her public comments. Indeed, she was talking to everyone and they have every right to offer their opinions on what was said. Touche, Jenna. Was *I* talking to YOU?"

Jenna responds: "Brandy, you will always be in the same business I am… Don’t think your above anybody especially after one of the only box covers you were on was a Fat Ladies of Wrestling Video! (I had to go into Lukes “Stars links to find out who the hell you even are!) How embarrassing! Seems to me that you can doll out a lot of vicious comments but your skin is a little thin when the tables turn. Now I AM talking to you, grandma!"

Drew Black, webmaster for AdultDVDTalk.com writes: Luke, I saw the top story on your site and thought I would shed some light on it. My chat server did get nuked and someone did successfully get into a computer in Jenna's office complex. (The computer they got into is not one of Jenna's.)

I have attached a copy of the IRC log where the perpetrator was bragging about attacking Jenna in a different channel on my server. The attempted hack on Jenna's systems and the attack on my chat server were made by separate, unaffiliated parties. The chat was going great and was a lot of fun prior to a few people getting out of hand. I booted them, they came back and started wreaking havoc on the server. People were dropped from the my server and through connections made at www.fivestardvd.com.

Despite the problems, Jenna answered a ton of questions and talked about what's planned for ClubJenna.com. It sounds like she's going to have a great site. You can read the chat transcript at http://www.adultdvdtalk.com/redesign/chat/jenna_transcript.asp

You'll see that she was exceptionally tolerant of some of the chatter's negative attitudes.

Luke says: I looked at the IRC transcript and it backs up what Drew writes above. I remember when my computer was hacked in late 1998 and how intrusive it felt.

Jenna writes: "I think Brandy owes me an apology… But then again, she never can admit she’s wrong.

"Now we all know why Brandy has to attack me… I think the evidence is right here in these pics!"

JB writes: I'd rather give Jenna a whole lotta love.

Email: hello, my name is oumbakintae. oumbakintae is very happy person. he has found much personal happiness in life. oumba thinks that jenna jameson is very unhappy person. she is always very negative towards people whenever i see her name on your page. she also make very stupid argument with age issue. she is very dumb for making fun of other woman for being older. is she not smart enough to know that she will only get older too. oumbakintae see and like many other women in adult movies who are much more beautiful than jenna. they make oumbakintae very happy. oumbakintae does not understand why jenna has such big ego? if she sho great, she would be big supermodel like Cindy Crawford. oumbakintae can help you find personal happiness jenna. oumbakintae very happy if others happy.

BrandyAlx1: You know, I spoke to someone who doesn't even believe whoever writes on your site *is* Jenna. The Luke Jenna seems to lack a lot of self-confidence the real Jenna is supposedly known for. A lot of the over-the-top attacks betray an enormous amount of insecurity.

Kid Dingus writes: Brandy, oh Brandy. When I thought my day couldn't get any worse, you stick your little reptillian nose out of the sewer and start ranting and raving around Luke's site, starting s--- with people for absolutley no reason.

"Jenna seems to like to compare herself to me a lot. Maybe she can only feel important by comparing herself to someone who gets no press, needs no press, and isn't even in the same business as she."

Ok, let's take a look at this Brandy. First of all, Jenna is 1000 times better looking on her worst day then you ever have been. And I'm not much of a Jenna fan. So that is saying A LOT.

As for "gets no press, needs no press", what the hell do you think Luke F-rd is? If you didn't get any press, Luke wouldn't be printing you, and if you didn't feel this burning desire to either try and A) ressurect what little porn carrer you have (or ever had), or B) act like that woman who I work with who seems to think it's her business to get involved in EVERYTHING everyone else is doing so she will feel signifigant, then you wouldn't be religiously writing Luke in the first place.

"and isn't even in the same business as she." No, you aren't in porn anymore. And we are all very glad about that. So please Brandy, do the world a favor and get a life. Do something other than sitting in front of your computer, living vicariously through Luke, and trying to get back at all those people who were more sucsessful in two months of doing porn than you were in your entire career.

Teen Tryouts

Brandon Irons writes: Hi Luke, Just letting you know about a new teen line I co-produce with Mark Wood for Devil's Films. "Teen Tryouts, Audition 1" is available in stores now and the second one will be coming out in October. To order, contact your local distributor. The first video features Bailey Martin, Paige Sinclair, Erika Sexton, Alexxxis Tyler, and Brandy Nash doing what they have to do to break into porn. Ten tsunami-sized facials highlight the tape. The second video features Lea De Mae, Candy Cotton, Felony, Shayla Heart, and one other teen. Fans can vote for their favourite teen in this video for a chance to win $350 worth of Devil's Films product. Watch the video for details. Female talent interested in trying out for "Teen Tryouts" can e-mail Brandon Iron at brandoniron_99@yahoo.com.

Luke Needs Your Recommendation

I'm dating someone who's suspicious of my moral character. So I am in need of character references from you, my dear reader, directed towards my Hebrew honey. Email Luke

Chaim writes: "I was thinking that perhaps a number of the gedolim in the industry could write to her on your behalf, sort of a background serenade of pornographic power. Like all them Hollywood jews extolling Bill Clinton. What Hollywood Hebrew could resist?"

Go Ahead - Kvell that You Know Me and Prepare to Mate your future Mate

Chaim writes Luke: I have sent you a letter that is like honey, better even than tickets to Barbara Steisand's last concert in LA or a night in the Lincoln room at the Clinton White House. It will make you kvell that you know me.

So You're Dating Luke F-rd:

I want you to know just how special this man is to so many of us. Prior to discovering his web site, I was a disenfranchised jew living in obscurity on the down and out lower east side of new york, working the knish counter at Yonah Shimmel's Knishery on Houston street. With fingers like Polish sausages, I was never able to cut it in any of the needle trades, where I might have met a nice shiksa and settled down. Instead, I ended up working the dough mixer at the knishery (still manually operated after all these years), and then, as I became increasingly rotund, the counter. The only woman I had ever dated was the blow up doll in my closet. It is not easy for a 375 pound man who sweats profusely to get a job in the "new" New York.

Today, thanks to Luke, I get to f--- porn starlets flown in for this purpose in exchange for my providing the regular dose of Chaim Amalek (TM) brand commentary that his readers so clearly crave, and I was able to move from the Lower East Side to the Upper West Side, which is where all the big shot jews of New York who do not live on the upper east side live. I have become reconciled to the faith of my ancestors, again thanks to Luke. Weekly discussions of the Parshat Shavouot, supplemented with intellectually intense discussions of the works of Dennis Prager and Wolfy Piertz of Bat Alliance Eretz have brought me back to my roots. This and more I owe to Luke. Now won't you please let him get to first base, if not out of any sexual attraction for him, then at least for me?

Chag Someach! (Cryptic Hebrew Reference)

Brandy Alexandre writes:

Dear Hebrew Honey:

This is just a quick note of support for my friend Luke. A personal reference I hope will help you should you have any lingering questions about his moral character and devotion to his faith. Yes, he has moral character. It seems from time to time that the price per gallon of moral character is as outrageous as the price of gasoline. But I'm sure he intends to refill his tank as soon as some moral character is released by President Clinton from his obviously vast reserves...

And please don't be concerned that he's surrounded by porn and half-naked porn starlets. I have personally offered him blowjobs and he has repeatedly declined. I'm told I'm not the only one.

Questions about his sexual orientation are quite common on his porn website, which may explain it. So, you don't have to worry about other women. If nothing else, I can attest that he is a devoted Jew. In observance of the Sabbath he won't even strike a match. If you ever happen to see him standing on a corner on Friday nights, I assure it's only so he can study the Torah beneath a street lamp. I'm positive there's another explanation as to why his pockets are stuffed with tens and twenties when he returns home.

Yours very truly, Brandy Alexandre

Quasarman Rants

From Quasarmanrants.com:

LOSS FOR WORDS

I have not updated my site this week at all largely because Gene Ross has been out of town and has not updated his site. I rely on Gene's site to provide inspiration for my daily rants and without him I am lost. Luke F-rd's site is nothing more than a newsgroup cut and paste facility featuring the bad spelling and grammar of cyberstalkers and degenerates combined with cryptic hebrew references that I quite frankly do not understand. Please Gene, come back soon.

CRUSHED IN METRO'S COLLAPSE?

Speaking of Luke F-rd, recently he posted a rather inflammatory story entitled "Metro Home Video Collapse" where he cited unsubstantiated rumours and innuendo about Metro's fiscal health as his source (as usual). Having just left Metro's offices a few hours ago I have seen no evidence of this. Luke F-rd has been predicting the demise of Metro for all of the three years that I have been employed there and yet the company growth over that period has warranted the gigantic building which now houses the company. For more from the boy who cried wolf please click over to l-keford.com.

Gold Club Accusations

From the Atlanta Journal Constitution (AJC.com):

Federal authorities have intensified their prosecution of the Gold Club, arresting the strip club's owner [Steven Kaplan] and indicting an alleged high-ranking captain of the Gambino organized crime family.

Kaplan and 16 others are charged with participating in a sweeping racketeering conspiracy, including illegal ties to organized crime, money laundering, prostitution, loansharking, credit card fraud and police corruption. Kaplan also is accused of paying Gold Club dancers to perform sexual favors for high-profile professional athletes to heighten the club's profile.

Michael DiLeonardo, also known as "Mikey Scars," was named in the amended indictment, which includes new charges unsealed Wednesday. He is accused of being a member of New York's Gambino crime family and extorting money from Kaplan's clubs.

Transsexual Lines

David Clark writes on RAME: You'll always find Sunshine's abysmal She-male tapes on your rack because they buy bad footage from South America, throw at least two tapes of it a week out, and sell it for so ridiculously cheap to the stores that the managers buy in bulk -- and charge you the same price as they do for the premium-priced ROGUE ADVENTURES. As in any free market, if the consumer chooses to support the s---, that's all he ends up having to choose from. My advice is to be brave and ASK for ROGUE ADVENTURES from the manager -- whether the current edition or previous ones. This sort of consumer demand DOES sink in, eventually.

And I agree wholeheartedly with the poster who mentioned how hot ROGUE ADVENTURES is, "straight" or not. Joey captures the exciting REALITY of sexual desire in an amazing way that puts all the assembly-line crap out there to shame. Which is why, what with PLEASE! and FASHION SLUTS to do as well, he simply can't turn out ROGUE ADVENTURES as quick and easy as another poster opined for ...

Kid Unimpressed

David writes: Hi Luke, Read your site on Sept.23rd and saw Kid Vegas' boasts about how great his website is. Went to the site. None of the buttons took you anywhere. The site was just a shell. So I sent KV the following message w/subjet line: Why Bother?

0riginal message: Putting up a site that has no content? Everything is under construction. Your ill timed boast on Luke F-rd's site sux if you've got nothing to back it up. Go take more drugs and forget about it some more...

Today I got this response: Keep looking moron you will see something soon. just what it reads under construction.

Wow, my very own email from a big porn star! Kid humdrum...er... I mean Kid Vegas, a true marketing genius!

XXX writes: I just left the legend offices and the newest Kid Vegas movie is hysterical. I couldn't believe that he let them do this, but the jeff assured me that it was all scott's ( vegas) idea. There is one scene where vegas comes in the room...pig tails and bad lipstick, wearing a plaid skirt and looking like he just hooked up with Max. Well....not max, but in the following scene, the kid has his legs pulled back by a large , hooded man and a huge dildo is rammed in his ass.....he doesnt look too comfortable, but he didnt hate it either. Then his partner pulls the big toy from his ass and stuffs it in his throat...and the kid licks it like a natural. I was shocked to see this myself, always assuming that the kid was straight. I guess , I am told, that there is a bunch of this type of footage from each of the vegas movies...but the kid tried to keep it under wraps. I think they are calling it" Kid Vegas...the bitch that I am". Anyway....he took the anal like a champ. The box looks cute too...he actually looks good dressed like a chick on the cover....they even used some editing to make the dick look avarage size...like a real man. I really wanted to work on that film too...but I couldnt become a fat skank pig by the call time so he used his regulars...you know the ones that jim powers thinks are too gross to shoot. Anyway...You kids gotta see this stuff.

Heather Barron - Script Doctor Extraordinaire

Amused writes: Yesterday we learned that Burbank's wackiest escort, Heather Barron, has diversified into $250 per hour script consulting. I am sure that many l-keford.com readers were thinking, "$250 per hour? For the opinion of the acclaimed author of "Fluorescent Pussy"? What a Bargain!" However, I am sure, there are still a few cynics who question an escort with no applicable experience in the motion picture industry to charge any fees for her non-fellatio related services. Well, unbelievers read a sample of Ms. Barron's work below and be sure to check out the "action" photos of her running around in a parking garage with a toy gun and floppy breasts.

"Ok. Now this is the deal. I got this call at 10pm on my cell phone from a guy sounding a lot like Arnold Swartznegger being held down by Maria Shriver. I thought it was a gag but when I hung up, in less than 10 minutes there was a Dominos guy on my doorstep with a Mushroom and Sausage pie with extra cheese. Strings of pepperoni spelled out the job, to distract 10 American men fronting as landscaping contractors and to get copies of their plans to lay a pest control on Burbank that would put cops to sleep and aspiring actresses to death. Someone, apparently had an ax to grind against the political infrastructure of the city and the floods of new talent descending upon the city. Now, since I was almost given a ticket by the Burbank police for walking across the street against a red light and since I sick of seeing bleached blonde models fronting as method actors, I second-guessed the task but the mission also came with garlic bread and a liter of Diet Coke, so I said "bon appetite" and with suggestive smile, gave the pizza boy the opportunity to go down on me. He looked at me kinda funny and said rather matter of factly "I'm back over at Arnie's place in 5 minutes. There is a Pizza Hut Express down the block. Ask for Tony. He's got a magnificent tongue." Great, another gay pizza boy who has contacts in the deep dish bisexual delivery world. Thanks Arnie. Couldn't you have just sent me a hoagie and a pickle? ..." Click here: ActionAdventurePhotos

Am I A Raincoater?

Pimpero writes on RAME: I like films with lots of men and one woman. I like them having lots of dp's and anal. I like to see men taking f---ing turns - I want them to be the active part, not woman -- she serves there as a mattress. I love to see that little "A" hole getting reddish and gaped. I like to see pussy stretched as far as possible. I like cumshots, I love to see explosions on face, preferably from many dicks at the same time so that it gets really real messy and sleazy.

Is there something that I don't like? Yeah. Plot. Thanx to God there is remote control.

And what about plain pussy f---ing? It will do if it is old missionary position *and* the guy on the top has tight ass which he moves eagerly up and down. In this case cumshot is preferably photographed from the other end (where their heads reside) so that we can see how he pulls out of his dick and shoots from between her legs. And btw. If there is a group of men jerking off, it is best letting woman lay below all dicks and photograp cumshots from very low angle so that it makes those men with their hard dicks look even more masculine and masters of the scene. May I regard my self as a raincoater? It would be an honour.

Masonry = Satanism

Masons beware. You call yourselves Christians, but you are actually just the unwitting dupes of Baphomet and Satan. Wear your fez. Swear your Islamic oath. Forsake the one true God. Burn in hell. Click here: The Curse of Baphomet

Fred writes: L-- I wonder whether Mr. Chick is aware that George Washington and virtually all of the founding fathers were Masons. Does that mean that the United States was founded by, and for the first half century of its existence run by satanists? Wow--no wonder this country is so screwed up.

Ishmael writes: In the Name of Allah the Merciful - Asalom Alechim! There is much confusion in your mind as both to Islam and masonry. No doubt this is due to the influence of the jews over your mind, and the weakness of character that leads you to the works of Jack Chick. In fact, Chick is a jew by birth. To better understand the source of your confusion, spend a day at the following web site, and learn!

http://abbc.com/islam/english/toread/pr-zion.htm

Ishmael ibn Abu of Mecca, Medina, and Al-Quds

Aghast writes: From chick.com: "...if you read the Qur'an's description of Allah, and read the Bible's description of God, it becomes obvious you are reading about two different persons. Allah orders his followers to kill those who deny Islam, while God instructs us to love our enemies. Allah had no son while God sent His Son to die for sinful men. Allah is "unknowable" while God seeks a personal relationship with His creation, man." Click here: The Pilgrimage

Luke Gets Mail

Tom writes: Luke, A friend of mine put adds out looking for girls to be in xxxfilms. He got some responses and he paid them to do things while he filmed them. Mainly he would hold his video camera while looking down at the girl while she is blowing him. He had the girls sign forms that authorize him to release them if he wishes to. However he just keeps the movies for himself

My question to you Luke is: Does having a movie camera present make it legal to pay a woman for sex. I heard on a radio talk show when a guy who claimed to have been in the adult industry said that having the movie camera there makes it legal because if anyone asked you can say your making a movie and she is the actress.

Erodo writes: Hi Luke, I have recently become a fan of your website and usually check in everyday to get the latest goings on. Since you seem to be the guy who is in the know, maybe you could help me out. I am a HUGE fan of Taylor Moore but there is just not a lot of info out there on her. She doesn't seem to have a fan club and I haven't found any articles or interviews with her. She seems to have worked with a lot of A list people, but I am not completely sure of her standing in the porn community. Do you have any info. Maybe she is just very private and thats cool.