Thursday, September 21st, 2000
NFB Porno Documentary
Director Paul Cowan's documentary on the porn industry shows on Canadian TV October 28. Here's an excerpt from its press release: "Among the predictable array of sleazy producers and agents are more surprising characters like Luke F-rd, a troubled convert to orthodox Judaism, who hosts one website on ethics and another on the porn trade. Ford incurs the wrath of the industry when he goes public with news of an HIV epidemic among actors."
Kitty Yung retired from porn seven years ago. Now she's back with a website that combines food and sex fantasies - WWW.EDIBLEFANTASIES.COM.
Roger Pipe interviews Kitty on his site www.rogreviews.com. Here's an excerpt:
RP: Why did you leave?
KY: I was scared of getting AIDS and not happy doing it anymore.
RP: What are your measurements?
KY: 36C-22 WAIST-26 HIP
RP: And of course, are they real?
KY: No
RP: How long were you in porn before having them done?
KY: About a year and a half.
RP: Why did you have them done?
KY: I didn't want to do them, but the girls told me I would get more box covers and magazine layouts if I had them done.
RP: Was there any pressure from within the business to have them done?
KY: Not the actual producers and never from the guys. Just the girls. I found out later they were just really jealous of me being natural.
RP: Do you watch your own movies?
KY: No, I have never seen one of them. I don't even own one.
Tampa Bay Mutiny
Jon writes: Luke, The following lead off the recap of Wednesday's L.A. Galaxy/Tampa Bay Mutiny soccer game in which the Galaxy won 5-2. "In the previous five days the Tampa Bay Mutiny had faced its share of distractions, including a hurricane and sharing the flight west with a gaggle of female adult film stars who had been in Tampa for an industry awards show."
Hmmmmmmmm - think the fact the Mutiny lost and who was on the plane had anything to do with each other? How much sleep would you get if women like Inari Vachs and Tera Patrick were on the same plane as you? If I was on the Mutiny I would actually root for the plane to be hijacked - lol.
Luke Gets Mail
Aurore Dupin writes: Dear Luke: While we have gotten up to our eyeballs in the final edit stages of the Web Site and Corporate Deal Doings, I HAD to post the following in response to Bianca Trump's latest bilge:
So Bianca hates the world and the media and people who read and post on your Web Site. Well, even one of our best biz partners oft needs guidance from his early corporate training that "the press is your enemy." Well, the press did not make Bianca enemies, she made herself her own worst enemy. Who else could get thrown out of a Porn Industry Legal Defense Fund benefit at Deja Vu in Ontario and have the Deja Vu manager personally apologize to me for her disgraceful conduct? Even during her brief stint in NYC one of my best friends tried to help her and got absolutely nowhere. If Bianca wants to see and fix the source of her problems, she should stop blaming the World and the Internet and just look in a mirror, if she can stand the view
JRob writes: Your censoring pictures is akin to Minnesota gambling. Some gambling (black jack, slot machines, and the lottery) is good, but all other games are bad and not allowed. Minnesota needs to decide: gambling or no gambling.
Similarly, you report on the adult entertainment industry, and publish pictures such as those from Mad Jack. You will show breasts, lesbianism, and other overtly sexual situations, but [gasp] GENITALS are bad.
Make up your mind. You are either in the porn industry (albeit peripherally) or you are not. Either publish the pictures as they are, or don't publish them at all. By censoring, you are salving your own conscience by applying a standard of pseudo-morality to your own behavior.
You are also moralizing to others without need or cause. If I click on the link, I want to see what I see. If I don't want to see it, it is my obligation not to click on the link. By censoring, you reap the benefit of a pornographic site (i.e. offering pornography to a consumer who wants to see it) without delivering the product. In essence, your morality is colliding with your ethics to the detriment of both.
Aske writes: Greetings from Norway! I've never quite understood the phrase "white thrash" until I saw the pictures of Kid Vegas, Mad Jack and those trailerpark blondes. They all seem to be the kind of people who sniff glue. I loved the yellow balloon pictures, congrat's to Kid Vegas, I guess booze just isn't enough when one's about to deal with such ugly girls. I showed the pictures to all my friends here at the university and they all laughed their asses off. White thrash!
John writes: Mad Jack, your blondes gave me a boner. Those are some hot f---in' whores!
Kid Vegas As A Role Model
Kid Curious writes: Kid Vegas rules! I have decided to dump Mr. Marcus as my mentor and follow the path of my new found hero, Mr. Vegas. My transformation begins today: First, I'll cut off all my hair and die it yellow just like all the other Eminem wannabes. Second, I'll get a severe sun burn on my face so I can emulate the Kid Vegas pink face look (the bitches dig it). Third, anytime someone takes my photo I'll give them the finger or pull a goofy gang sign (cuz I'm a bad ass just like KV!). Fourth, I'll get my ass kicked daily so I can generate a steady income stream from suing fellow porners. Fifth, I'll walk around perpetually with the Kid Vegas "Man, I gotta take a huge dump!" scowl on my face. Oh yeah, I'm gonna be the number one, mack daddy, wigger, pimp of Modesto, baby! Peace out from Kid Curious! Do more lithium!
Kid Ace writes: I am sick and tired of reading about that limp dick Kid Vegas. He is such a joke. He is a no talent, ugly, drug addict wanna be. His act is getting sooooo played. The poor guys dick is softer than a bucket of mud. I know i'll be reading soon that he overdosed or something, but hopefully i'll get to kick his scrawny, crack head, fake gangster, limp dick ass first. im outtie!!!
Brian Kushner writes: Luke: As you know in my previous emails I wondered why Kid Vegas was handliing the Tony Eveready deal like such a pussy. Well, the pictures you posted of him answered it all for me, HE IS A PUSSY.. What a pile this f---ing EMINEM clone is.. Okay Luke, I'm off to do more drugs and listen to my EMINEM CD.
Lovette's Big Belly Bukkake
Aghast writes: AVN has been trumpeting retired pornlet Lovette's return to XXX for the past few weeks like it was some great cause for celebration. Well, put away the champagne all you rain coaters. I surfed on over to super sexy Dane, Kira Egger's site where she has posted some exclusive behind the scene pics of 'Lovette's Big Tit Bukkake' from Metro and all I can say is ... SHE IS AS BIG AS A HOUSE! Her massive tits are now dwarfed by her enormous gut! Have Mercy! I have to wonder did she come back to porn for the fame, the money, or the catering? Click here: Jubii Kanal - Erotik
Concerned writes: Was that shot of Lovette's bukkake with the white stuff all over her face supposed to be sperm from her 50 admirers' penises or the pastry filling from her 50 eclairs? Ugh! What was Metro thinking?
Michael writes: Dear Faghast, RE: Lovette Stop your wondering pin dick. She probably had bills to pay. Or maybe the thought of exposing herself to the ridicule of mindless closet cases has some particular appeal. In hopes of forestalling your lame f---ing responses... [1] No Im not the person you have once again needlessly insulted. [2] Before enlightening us as to the *thick skins* posessed by porn chicks, please list the ones you know personally. [3] Before.....Awwww just f--- off. My dimwit tolerance levels are way down. Bruce (yeah it's me again numb nuts. Didnt learn a thing last time did you?
Porn Actress Speaks To Debate Society
DUBLIN, Sept 21 (Reuters) - A British porn actress will address one of Dublin's most respected debating societies on Friday, following in the footsteps of former South African president F.W. de Klerk and actor Richard E Grant. Wendy Taylor, a pornographic magazine model and video actress, will join a debate hosted by The Literary & Historical Society of University College Dublin...
Red Ribbon Treatment
Patrick Riley writes on RAME: Imagine that you go home from your boring day working for Bloated Corporation and when you walk in the door the wife tells you that she has a little present for you (your birthday, a token of her esteem for your manliness, it doesn't matter) and it's upstairs in the bedroom. You go upstairs and there's Gina Bigtits lying on the bed, naked except for a red ribbon tied around her waist like one would do up a present. Nature takes its course...
Conceptually the idea is that there's zero effort involved in organizing the girl to screw and that you don't have to worry about nasty things like child support, divorce, or even getting caught because your wife has given the girl to you. You could imagine the girl blindfolded or with a bag over her head--it's just a life support system for a warm hole. Not the most exciting circumstances although there's a certain erotic value in having enough power that your wife will take care of your needs to this extent.
Pushy Porn Stars
Rob writes on RAME: Mr. Riley, You've described other porn stars as "pushy" before. What do you mean? In interactions with you, others, or onscreen. I'm curious.
Pat Riley replies: Really? Or trolling? I'll take you on face value for the moment.
In my opinion, the viewer should not look behind the curtain. The porno industry (and the regular movie industry) present us with a product and we should only be looking at the image they provide. The girl and the scene are just a collection of pixels on your TV. It and she should only exist there.
Unfortunately, the industry doesn't co-operate with this view and so there's a lot of spillover from the performers' real lives. Similarly the industry makes so many gonzo movies where the girl tells her life story that it's impossible to divorce the real from the as-it-should-be fantasy world of the movies.
So the answer is "onscreen" plus some unavoidable real life taint. I seldom interact with any porn performer except in the context of this NG.
As to the meaning of the word, the ideal female is submissive, available at the beck and call of the male, willing and anxious to please, and deriving her pleasure from pleasing the male. (He of course should be gentlemanly and not use his power to hurt or degrade and should be solicitous of her feelings.) Females who don't conform to this image (e.g. aggressive women) are "pushy".
Lynne writes: In other words, a bimbo with no agenda of her own. And females have only two choices for proper behavior: submissive or aggressive. Simple self-sufficient mutual pleasuring isn't on the menu. Sorry to be so pushy, but will someone lock this guy in a closet for a month a la Symbionese Liberation Army vs. Patti Hearst, and teach him what it really means to submit?
On the other hand, the ideal male has a wallet like an ATM with unlimited withdrawal, never expects sex without cunnilingual preliminaries, takes out the trash without waiting to be asked, handles all household financial details, keeps the cars clean and fueled, picks up his own dirty underwear and socks, doesn't drink beer, watch football or snore, can say, "You are the most beautiful woman I have ever known" in at least three languages, keeps himself fit and bathed, and loves housework.
Jack Chick Is No Sissy
Yesterday porn director Michael Raven continued to mock the work and words of the great Jack T. Chick. Sinners, it is oh so common to denigrate that which we do not understand or that which we fear most. Which one is it for you, Brother Raven? You remind me of the main character in today's Chick tract. "Duke" also thought that Christians were 'sissies' and then he saw the truth. Please Mr. Raven, let the warmth of Jack T. Chick's message thaw your frozen heart. Read and be saved. Click here: The Sissy
Advice For The Lovelorn
Rumdar writes Luke: Sorry I can't help you with the Jewish shtick. I am looking into the Hindu religion myself. Also the Shinto. I have my mother's ashes on the mantel. She is not kvetching at me like she used to. As far as being respected in the community....well the guy who is looking to be respected in the community usually is found out to be some kind of kink-oid. They discover a Polaroid of him receiving a golden shower from a 300 LB hooker. I can't think of anyone I respect in my community. It is difficult to think of anyone I respect in the world much less Houston, Texas.. Start the advice column...You hand out the advice and then your loyal readers will advise you on how to improve your miserable existence (your take on your life not mine).....I agree with Amalek. More torah or more bible or more anything except more sex, good food and money is not the answer.
Rumdar sends along this excerpt from Garrison Keilor's column on Salon.com: Dear Mr. Blue, In June, I broke up with my boyfriend of a year and a half because I could see we were not heading toward my goal of marriage and children. A month later I met a wonderful, handsome, fun, sweet, generous man -- who happens to be 48 (I am 28). We quickly became friends, and then lovers. After several dates, he told me that he feels he is too old to begin a family -- and that the age difference prohibits him from considering marrying me. What I should have done at that moment was say, "OK, fine, goodbye." But what I did instead was decide that I was having an awfully good time with him, and with no prospective Mr. Right banging down the door, what did I have to lose? So now we continue to see each other, under the auspices that we can and should see other people. Of course, this is a recipe for disaster. I am not terribly interested in looking around for other, more suitable men -- I am being wined and dined and doted on by this guy! Part of me feels terrific; I'm having a good time, I'm not alone and I am free to date other men and be available without being desperate. And part of me feels resentful that my current beau gets the pleasure of my company without any commitment at all whatsoever. Mr. Blue, what should I do?
Keilor writes: Dear Afraid, Mr. Wonderful may be leveling with you, but I question it: Maybe his feelings for you aren't particularly strong and he's sticking with you because he likes to get laid by a woman with young skin and fewer issues than the ladies his age. He's at a sensitive point in life, starting to sag, farting more, hair sprouting from his ears, guys his age showing up in the obituaries, and a 28-year-old lover is a terrific tonic. I point this out only by way of saying that you, my dear, hold a strong trump hand and you should maneuver with confidence. Avoid sudden turns for no good reason. Don't swerve if there's no raccoon in the road. Have your good time but cut back on the frequency and look elsewhere for company.
Rumdar writes: My buddy Dave had another take on this: This girl appears to be having the same problem that many girls her age have. Ten more years and they are down the tubes. As always, they want the best of all worlds. They want: the family the money to be special (only older men want to make younger women feel special) to get everything and pay nothing. It is a fantasy world that they live in. How do some get away with it? Almost all men are raised by mothers.
Lynne writes: As to the young woman who wants to date a 48-year-old man but wants him to commit to marriage and a family, I would suggest she listen to him: HE'S TOO OLD TO START A FAMILY. Give him a choice -- either marriage and no family, with a prenuptual agreement specifying serious financial compensation for remaining childless, or you walk away completely. And stick to it. As long as he can play around with young stuff that will put up with his s---, why should he have to face reality and go out with women his own age, who no longer have that "I want a baby" issue?