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Thursday, June 1st, 2000

Email Luke

Luke Gets Mail

Donny writes Luke from college: here's an idea hey jackass i fricken dated some dumb ass, pornstar who just got a boob job, and i know this not a healthy thing , either is spanking it to porn , but dude if i am going to look at your fricken site , could u at least make it some what understandable to people who dont' get naked in front of a god damn camera every day . Really dude i am sure your a great journalist and all this crap but make your site readable to the average fricken porn watching joe, thanks and your still not a jew, like i said last time, you either born this way or your not, conversion . bo bersion, that's a bunch of hoey

Luke: thanks, who are you?

Donny: a god damn jew who dated a pornstar who just told you your site is not understandable to the average f---ing guy that wants porn gossip are u retarded? strippers and pornstars are overrated in bed too!

listen if are a converted jew why do u have a such a fasination with the lowest of the lowest of people, u are a jew why don't you write for a jewish paper or something of the like. See dude this is why i am a young self hating jew is sell outs like you. It is those old dirty bastards jews real jews a bad name,

Will: Hi Luke - Your site's fine the way it is. It may take a new reader a while to acclimate him/herself to the ongoing threads and/or topics, but otherwise, your site is great just the way it is. Please don't change for the vocal idiots who need everything spoon fed to them. I don't watch porn (much, mostly a reader), and your site still makes plenty of sense. Perhaps a trip through the archives should be mandatory for newbies? Eh, anyway, please continue to chronicle the lives of this particular subculture of America just as you have been.

Patrick: Hello, I agree with donny,you do need to change your website a bit. How about some pictures of the people you're talking about, since not all of us who read your site are porn insiders. They don't have to big pics, just head shots are fine. I still read your site several times a day even tho I don't know who half these people are and pictures would help to put names to faces. While you're at it, change that tired ass pic of yours on your main page, since it looks like you've got a bad headache. Why don't you have a different pic of you for each day of the week or something? Plus, match the links of pictures to the people in the pictures since they don't always match. Come on Luke, make the effort! I know you can do it.

Tori Welles Book

Frank writes: There's going to be a book about Tori Welles (Brittania Paris, originally Gina aka Geraldine Hodgeschlater) called "From Britain to Paris." It is based on Ms. Welles life. Publisher is unknown. The writer is a Journalist also unknown. The agent for the writer is Maureen Regan.

Last I heard Tori Welles worked as a cocktail waitress in San Diego. She's a firecracker, and usually forthright.

Brandy: Geraldine Hodgeschlater has never been her name, Gina was never her nickname. I've seen her birth certificate. How did he snow some agent into thinking he knew his subject enough to write a book? But then, Luke, you pulled it off...

Luke Blown In Shul?

Mike South phoned while driving from Atlanta to New Orleans.

Mike: "I heard some juicy gossip. Only it's about you."

Luke: "Cool."

Mike: "I heard you got a blowjob in synagogue."

Luke: "Not true. I got one from a woman I knew from synagogue. But I've never been blown in synagogue."

Mike: "Well, I heard this from someone who was in the room with you. You were telling Rob Spallone, James DiGiorio and those guys."

Lynne: You have some catching up to do. I managed that at 16. Have you ever gotten a blow job in a religious edifice of any kind?

Luke: Does my apartment count?

Lynne: Luke, with your propensity for making up imaginary on-line friends who will write your column, I have decided that unless I see a picture of Amy S. I will assume she is you, full of self loathing over so-called excessive masturbation during a traumatic puberty.

I wanted to let Patricia know that as I am indeed a little living lab (when I'm having sex with porn performers, as are they all) I was glad to furnish the opportunity for her to remind people that STD's are no LOL matter.

As you reminded me, my depression this morning was only a temporary aberration. I am going to stand behind my position that saying, "I miss you" to my lover, Dave Hardman, from out of state in the context of a long term intimate and business relationship does not deserve the overeaction of completely cutting off contact and accusing a friend of stalking.

And that if you had taken one of my calls instead of pissing me off (did I threaten to kill you?), nothing would have escalated. I commit to my word, at least, wanting you to be happy, and would have asked what was wrong. We're talking lunch, not rape and pillage.

Mad Jack Photos

Photos from Mad Jack's "Las Vegas Strip" for Pleasure Productions.

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    Sunshine, Summer (blonde), Marco

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    Sunshine, Summer

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    Sunshine, Summer

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    Sunshine, Summer

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    Sunshine, Summer

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    Sunshine

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    Mad Jack, Summer

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    Summer


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    Summer
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    Summer

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    Sunshine

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    Sunshine, Summer

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    Ashley

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    Ashley

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    Ashley

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    Sunshine

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    Sunshine

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    Sunshine

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    Sunshine

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    Sunshine

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    Summer

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    Mad Jack and the gang

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    gang

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    Fawna

Camp Erotica Girls Fire Back

Kiki Dare writes: I simply wish to say that as one of the Camp Erotica girls that have endlessly been criticized for being unattractive, obviously these guys see something worth looking at. If they didn't there wouldn't bee all these emails. I have worked for top companies and lesser companies and have been in many magazines. Camp Erotica is not about the huge boobed, blonde, anorexic, fake scenes that seem to be a standard. Camp Erotica is about people having the balls to try a new approach. If that makes me and my coworkers unattractive, then so be it.

Ariel writes: Luke, I just wanted to respond to some of the horrible things that were said about the girls from Camp Erotica. I happen to be one of the girls, and i must admit that the photos that you have online are absolutely horrible..The lighting wasnt good at all. Although i feel that i should have the right to redeem myself to my public..I am enclosing a few pictures of myself just to show that i really am not a "swamp thing" as your readers have said. I would appreciate it if you would publish these on your site. I've worked with MadJack on many occassions and he can verify that those pics on the mondo sites are not accurate at all. And yes i have also worked worked for Vivid Video, for those who said that wasnt possible.

Luke: I must warn our audience that some of these photos are sexually explicit and may not be appropriate for children. Parents should use their discretion.

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    Ariel

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    Ariel

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    Ariel

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    Ariel

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    Ariel

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    Ariel

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    Ariel

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    Ariel

Mad Jack: "Ariel is cute. Those guys were hammering the girls. That's bulls---...

"Those were just bad shots. I think those guys at Mondo were f---ing idiots. I don't think they know how to shoot. They look like bikers trying to make movies. I remember their bulls--- with Mila.

"Hardman said it was a cool shoot. He called me on the way back from Temecula. He had one of those broads, Ricki Lixx, in the car and they had all kinds of problems. They ended up dumping her out. She was acting weird..."

Brian writes: Lukey: I retract my statement that all the girls from Swamp Thing are UGLY. Ariel is quite cute....I can't believe a porn company would promote a video with such s---ty pictures as Ariel points out.

Luke: I conducted a long interview with Ariel by phone Thursday.

Luke: "How did you get into the industry?"

Ariel: "About three years ago... I was a dancer in Fresno, where I live now. I moved to Los Angeles and started working as a dancer at the Body Shop in Hollywood. I started working there just before all the Heidi Fleiss stuff started. I was approached by one of her recruits to work with them. I went down to her house and spoke to her.

"While I was there, there were a couple of adult producers (including Luc Wylder) there. I figured I'd be less likely to get arrested working in the adult industry than working for her."

Luke: "Did you work for Heidi Fleiss?"

Ariel: "I did a couple of private shows for her clientelle in Beverly Hills.

"I did my first adult movie for Urbano Martin. It was a good experience. I was nervous at first. My first scene was with Guy DeSilva. He was wonderful. The movie was done at a house. It was catered. It was well organized. It made me feel very comfortable. I've always been a very sexual person."

Luke: "How many people had you slept with in your life before you got into the adult industry?"

Ariel: "Not too many. I had quite a few longterm relationships. I'd say five at the most."

Luke: "And how many movies have you done?"

Ariel: "Upwards of 200."

Luke: "Did you go register with Jim South after your first shoot?"

Ariel: "Yes, after that I registered with Jim. I had been referred to some of the other agents in town, like [Regan Senter's] Beautiful Models, Reb... I was not comfortable with the situation. I did not feel that it was necessary to do any kind of couch call to work. They [Reb and Regan] epitomized the sleazy greasy porn life.

"I spoke to Jim and he got me working right away."

Luke: "And have you had a good experience with Jim South over the years?"

Ariel: "Yes. It's been difficult for him to get me a lot of work because I'm up in Fresno. But he calls me at least once a week to let me know if there's a casting call. He definitely pushes me as far as the books and the email pictures. He does what he can. It's difficult if someone calls and needs somebody right now, I'm two-and-a-half hours away... I have nothing but good things to say about him and his office."

Luke: "Have you encountered the casting couch routine with many of the producers?"

Ariel: "I've had a couple who've tried to pull that. Only one (Shawn Ricks) was at Jim's office and when I told him (Jim) about it, he took care of the situation. Regan Senter was the one who insisted that for him to get me work, he'd have to see how I worked onscreen with him. And that was not going to happen.

"Then with Leisure Time... Kid Sparkle wanted a freebie beforehand. And Kid Vegas tried to pull the same thing on me... I was at another shoot. He'd gotten my number from somebody else and he wanted me to come down and you know show him what I had. I said if that is what you're looking for there is no reason for me to even go down there. And I didn't.

"I've had maybe two other bad experiences in the industry. Aside from that, everything has been great.

"Recently I ran into a situation with a gentleman named Jeff Scott. He really rolled me a good one. Around Easter, he was supposedly shooting for Metro. I came to find out that that was not true. I guess he'd contacted my friend Tony Everready to say that he needed some girls for Easter weekend. He wanted to book me for five days. I gave him my rate and he was fine with it.

"He told me to get the rental car. I got it. He told me to bring him the rental receipts... Don't worry about. This progressed for a week-and-a-half and nothing ever came through... He used Tony Eveready too. And Tony finally got fed up, don't even bother calling me. Don't ask me for any favors. I'm done with you. That's it.

"He did use a couple of girls that Tony sent him and the checks he wrote were bad. So now it is impossible to get in contact with this guy... I told Jim South... Jim pulled his back out and wasn't in the office for a while. He wasn't getting back to anybody who'd called... When I finally got a hold of Jim and told him what was going on, I guess this gentleman was somebody who'd been talent with Jim. And he wasn't up to par, couldn't keep wood. So he went off to try to shoot his own. So that was the worst experience I've had.

"Then I did this fetish film with a girlfriend in the industry, Dalles DeNiro. We had done a fetish shoot that just supposed to be bondage and some light spanking... I don't do anything harder than that because if I get hurt, then it is hard for me to work. Well, when I got on the set, I found out that they wanted flogging and to seriously hit my pussy really hit. I'm like, no, I'm sorry. And he gave me a hard time and Jim had to intervene and get the money from him.

"I had a bad experience with a photographer in Las Vegas, Alex Hunter. He told me he wanted me for some solo photography, maybe a few girl-girl photos. When I got there, he had a girl he wanted me to do a girl-girl video with, who didn't have a DNA test. The dildos he had were not clean. I told him no. You want to pay me $400 for this. First of all, she doesn't have a test. Second, I am not using something that somebody else has used and has not been properly sterilized. I have a reputation to protect and I am not going to do it. Even though I had gone to Vegas basically for him.

"I've had no problems with anybody else, as far as pay and the way they've treated me..."

Ariel was sometimes known as Ariel Cassidine.

Luke: "Tell me about your experiences with Mondo Family Films."

Ariel: "As far as the crew, absolutely adorable. I can't say enough good things about them. As far as their films..."

Ariel laughs.

Ariel: "When I did the Bride of Countess Recula, I was only there for my scenes. I was never around to see anything else. So when I actually saw the movie, just a couple of weeks ago, I was astonished at the things that had been put into the movie that I was unaware of... Not to mention the lighting which made everybody look so hideous. They want to do things very different and out of the ordinary but they don't put any effort into the lighting and to make people look like humans.

"They're wonderful people but it tends to lower my standards. This last thing, Camp Erotica, I've known about since Recula. Terry wanted me from the get go. He's always loved me. The thing is, they usually don't use a lot of top named people and this last one, oh my god, ok, I've driven six hours, what am I going to do? I don't want to let them down or disappoint them. I show up and the entire cast was made up of, oh god, it was not the best looking cast I've ever seen, to say the least.

"I had to drive six hours, not knowing where I was going, was irritating. Then to see the pictures and to see how badly the lighting was yet again. Everything was done with just the natural light, and there were so many trees in the area, there were so many shadows. Half the time you couldn't even see people's faces. So, what could I do? I didn't want to say anything to them. But when it is thrown up on the internet, this is my reputation at hand.

Ariel: "When I have companies like Vivid and Wicked and Sin City and then I come up in something like this, it doesn't look good for me. And as much as I love them and love working for them, their movies are... I don't want to be known for being in cult classic porn films. It's not something I want to do, I only do it because of how I feel about them.

"In Countess Recula, they have a blood orgy scene. They have a peeing scene with Bridget the Midget. There's a scene with a guy sucking his own dick. Not to mention that Donita and myself were the only known people in the movie. Everybody else was very low budget.

"The editing and makeup looked great. But the lighting... They shot it in San Pedro in an old abandoned liquor store. And they brought in no added lighting. They wanted it to look gothic and dark and sinister even though it made everybody look hideous. Everybody looked bad and for those who didn't look good in the first place, it wasn't good for them either... They went for shock value, instead of trying to make it look like a well done movie.

"A couple of the scenes I saw, whoa! I didn't know anything about this. And my name is thrown all over the boxcover. Recula has been on E! Entertainment and the National Enquirer and Howard Stern.

"The girl (Shante) that played the lead role had just had a boob job. Whoever was the doctor had completely done a hack job on her. She had five inch scars under each breast.

"They wanted me because I am Italian and I have naturally black hair and blue eyes. I have a tattoo of vampire bites on my neck which I had gotten when I was younger. That attracted them right away...

"The movie was shocking. I did not even want my boyfriend to see the movie. It was so graphic at times. And I look hideous. What can you do?"

Luke: "How long have you been with your boyfriend?"

Ariel: "Off and on for eight years."

Luke: "What does he think about you being in porn?"

Ariel: "He's ok with it. He doesn't like to hear a lot of the details. He loves me. A lot of the stuff I do now is girl-girl or solo girl masturbation. Anything that involves boy-girl scenes, he is not thrilled about it. But he knew that I had always done this. He just doesn't want to see it. As far as the girl-girl stuff goes, he's overjoyed about that. He loves that concept.

"I recently did the 101 Cheerleader thing for Vivid. And I had the pleasure of working with Heather Lynn. That was unbelievable. They had the girls come in in sets of eight and by far our eight was the hottest and best team they had, the entire time they shot. All the girls got to know each other beforehand. Got comfortable with each other. Heather and I had spent most of the day together before we shot. Things just went really well.

"They had a guy who did all of us. He was a trooper... Just like 101 Nurses with Bobby Vitalie. I think he made it to 70 something and his dick couldn't take it anymore. And it had nothing to do with him being with so many girls. It was him pulling the condom off and on... It's only four or five strokes, pull the condom off and put the next one on. You do that enough times and you are bound to get sore.

"Our scene was more centralized around Heather and myself. Most of the shots were of the girls. The cameras centralized around what we were doing and when the guy was involved, it was only a minute or two for each girl. And it wasn't anything that anybody paid much attention to. After the girls had taken care of each other, the guy just did his thing. It wasn't a big deal for any of us.

"I did a gangbang series for Devils Films with [black guys] Tony Eveready and Byron Long... That was my first DP. Byron was vaginal and Tony was the anal.

"Tony and I had worked together previously for Rod Fontana film for Pleasure. We talk on the phone all the time. I was very comfortable with Tony. He was an absolute gentleman. And I've heard a lot of horrible stories about Tony as far as him getting aggressive and rough with the girls... And that worried me. I had only done one other anal scene. That was with Chris Cannon for Al Borda.

"But Tony was unbelievable. He talked me right through it. He was completely a gentleman. He whispered in my ear to relax. I'm not going any further. You're all right. And I was fine. It didn't hurt me. It was quite pleasurable."

Luke: "So you have no problem with doing interracial?"

Ariel: "No. The only interracial things I've done have been with Tony... I've also worked with [black guy] Mark Anthony who was also a complete gentleman. An extremely nice guy."

Luke: "How prevalent is drug abuse in the adult industry?"

Ariel: "I've seen it a little, but not as much as most people would assume. Most of the general public thinks that everybody is doing cocaine and speed... I could count on one hand the number of times that I have seen any drug usage on set or outside the set. I don't go to the porn parties. It's a job for me and that's it. A bit of pot here and there and a line.... But nothing that would cause a problem on the set. Alcohol is more of an issue than anything else."

Luke: "What are some of the major misconceptions that outsiders have about the adult biz?"

Ariel: "Of the people I run into, they think that any guy can pop into the business. You just throw a girl and a guy together and they have sex and do what they want to do. The guy can come when he wants. They have the misconception that it is all real and it is not. Even though it is porn there are still a lot of Hollywood tricks of the trade that go along with it. You just can't come whenever you want. You come when they tell you to. If you don't do what they say, you don't get paid.

"Also, just because you're in the industry means that you are promiscious outside the business as well, which in a lot of cases is not true. I know that a lot of people in the business that either have a partner in the industry or they don't, and what they do separately is not what they do onscreen. It is a completely different situation. They are still very monogamous outside of the business. What they do onscreen is work and that is it. There's no emotion and no feeling. It's just an act.

"But a lot of people think that if you are a porn star, then you're an easy lay.

Pie Dog Savage writes: We at Mondo love Ariel, we unfortunately must agree to disagree with her. Mondo has gotten press and we hope that it will be a windfall for Ariel. After all, any press is good press. On the subject of Mila, well lets just say she f---ed herself. We are kind people and will not try to make her look bad; further, we have forgotten all the cruel things she said about us. More to the point, f--- you Madjack-off. Your idea of quality product is transsexuals being humiliated. Did you learn that in prison? I've a great idea- why don't I tear your f---ing spleen out and f--- it before your eyes. I don't usually don't get so angered by sub-human trash, but you make me want to puke. How dare you be so self-righteous. Why don't you get born again and leave us the f--- alone, get taken up in the rapture- oh pure and holy man.

Pie Dog Savage

ps. I'ld love to shove my foot up your ass in the next Mondo production!

Brother Terry writes: Luke, Is Mad Jackoff out of jail? It's always nice to hear from this fine citizen. What a wonderful discourse we had with him about the Russian anal-queen Mila. And now it seems he's in a tizzy again. I would like to remind Mad Jackoff that this is only porn, not brain surgery, and to try and calm down before you lose your hair and go blind. Oops, too late!! Hey Luke, I saw the fine pix that Mad Jackoff sent you. Now THAT'S good work! You are a visionary, Sir! Love the set,too. It looks like the inside of a condo used in the Witness Relocation Program. Very nice. Someday, me and my Biker friends hope to make movies as good as yours, until then, we'll look forward to enjoying the innovative camera work you are so famous for. Humbly, Brother Terry.

MJ: First of all thank's for the complements. I too hope that someday you'll learn how to shoot. I also hope that someday you'll decide to shoot movies that people would actually LIKE TO WATCH. As to your comment about witness relocation, I wouldn't know as I did my time, however, it seems like something that you perhaps have considered. And yes, we do remember how you f---ed over Mila. Maybe you guys should stick to running your video store and leave the film making to those of us who know what we're doing. Good luck.

Colonel Rob from Mondo: Dear Luke: I am sorry for the Virulent attack on Mad Jack, made by Brother Terry and Pie Dog. We at Mondo are a family, and so now and then the children get out of control. To be honest with you, we have nothing against Mad Jack. We have never bought any of his product, and have therefore not lost any money on his product. Mondo Video is quite well known. We believe Mad Jack is taking advantage of our notoriety. Pie Dog still wants to kick Mad Jack's ass, but we have calmed him down (the pills work wonders). But if Mad Jack wants to defend his honor, in the near future Mondo will be hosting a good old fashion Mexican wrestling match. If Pie Dog wins, Mad Jack will perform oral sex on Rocketboy; if it goes the other way we promise to buy one of Mad Jack's videos and actually put it out on our shelves to rent (oh the horror).

Swamp Trannies No More

Aghast apologizes: Ariel, KiKi, Maren, and Rikki please accept my sincerest and deepest apology. Ladies you are not '"swamp trannies" as I had mistakenly labeled you, but young, attractive, shapely, 100% genetic females. I was wrong.

Ladies, I was misled by those perfectly AWFUL photos that Brother Terry unleashed on l-keford.com. Before you write off my apology let us remember two major show biz marketing facts: 1) that controversy sells and 2) any press is good press. So no harm has really been done since now all of Luke's dozens of readers will now be compelled to purchase "Camp Erotica" for themselves to judge your beauty.

Nonetheless atonement for my sin is required and so I submit to you my proposed punishment . . . Vomitorium III: The Violation of Aghast! A reverse gang bang with you four goddesses and myself. I must be punished.

ps Terry fire that f---in' photographer!

Brother Terry: Luke, I would like to respond to my new friend Aghast. Sir, you are quite correct that the photos I sent in to Luke were of inferior quality. Unfortunately, I can't fire the photog, because the pix I sent were just snapshots that crew members took with their own cameras, includuing me. The still photographer that we HIRED for Camp Erotica is Mr. Titus Moody, winner of an XRCO Lifetime Achievement Award! Unfortunately, because Titus used film that needed to be developed, I didn't have any of the shots he took available when I decided to get the 'ol publicity ball a-rollin'. So I used the pix taken with our somewhat less-than-professional digital cameras, which were ready to send right away. Aghast, I absolutely agree with you, that controversy sells, and that any press is good press. But I doubt that makes any of the girls feel any better. Obviously, I feel s---ty that our girls are getting trashed mercilessly by so many people on Luke's site. For that I hope they accept my apology! . Sorry Ladies, I love you all, you are all gorgeous and sexy, and next time I'll wait till the chromes are done. P.T.L., Brother Terry.

Aghast replies: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I forgive you for those wretched photos. But what about me? I still must be punished for my tasteless crime with a reverse gang bang. Those beautiful maidens deserve justice!

Terry: Aghast, you really HAVE been a bad boy, haven't you? I agree, there must be some form of atonement for your sins, but what exactly? Your gang-bang idea is not a bad one, but I like the sound of this better: "The Reverse Bukkake" featuring the Camp Erotica Girls and that very naughty scribe-Aghast! Four beautiful ladies squirting girl-jizz all over Aghast's ready and waiting face.Now THAT"S a video I would rent! I'm telling you, Aghast, we NEED you here at Mondo Family Films. I'll give you this weekend off to get your things in order, but I need you to report for work bright and early Monday morning. You're on the clock now, soldier!

Aghast replies excitedly: Yes! I will even accept a reverse bukkake, but please use better lighting and photographic equipment! Even I do not want to be confused for a she-male. One more thing under NO circumstances may that fat bastard James Long participate in said bukkake! KiKi! Maren! Rikki! Ariel! The bukkake bowl is under my chin. Extract your revenge.

Unsung Stars

MarMac writes on RAME: I've compiled a Top Ten list of starlets that I think are unsung stars. By unsung, I mean those girls who really only played supporting roles for most of their careers. Most of the time they were the third or fourth girl mentioned on the credits and had very few appearances as the featured girl on the boxcover, but now are recognized as favorites in the history of adult videos. I also have a list of girls who are present day stars who are not the stars, but who give great performances in their videos.

10: Mandi Wine -- maybe the best redhead ever (besides Shanna McCullough). Great body and very sexy attitude.

9: Missy Warner -- one of the most beautiful women ever in porn.

8: Fallon -- except for the squirting videos, she never got her due. Very sexy body and enthusiastic.

7: Misty Regan -- she didn't make many videos, but she was a favorite of mine.

6: Rene Summers -- yeah I know. She regularly appears on "the ugliest stars ever" lists, but I think she was HOT!

5: Kim Chambers -- if you like big tittied blondes, she is the prototype.

4: Brittany O'Connell -- sexual dynamo who had 2 of the best tits in the biz.

3: Tamara Lee -- All natural, girl next door who could suck cock all day.

2: Rebecca Bardoux -- had some of the most beautiful hair in the biz and just exuded sex. A great anal queen.

1: Vanessa Chase -- even after being out of the business for 4 or 5 years now, her name regularly comes up as the starlet most viewers would like to see come back.

Present day (in no particular order):
Elena -- young, dumb and blonde!! Plus she has THAT SMILE!!
Toni James -- just absolutely gorgeous face and innocent smile.
Raylin -- I have about 4 of her videos that she absolutely carries with her performance.
Stryc9 (Cherry) -- one of the best bodies in the biz.
Cortknee -- she might be the next Vanessa Chase even though she has those ugly bolt ons. She was born to f---!
Blondie Anderson -- she is not pretty at all, but she has some kind of fantastic body!
Blair Segal -- the consummate girl next door. What a smile!!

Ron: I would add Marilyn Martyn (nasty with a huge sexual appetite), Nikki Brantz (dap queen), Alessa Allure (nice overall but variable), Ginger Bush (hot in a schoolgirl way in depraved fantasy 2), Bambi (of gbg 16 -- she exudes sexual energy)...

Axle: I'd also add Britt Morgan. I realize she just made it into the hall of fame or whatever the porno biz calls it, but I NEVER hear her career discussed. She was a hot southern belle with a really filthy mouth at a time when most actresses were just ooohing and aaahhhing their way thru scenes. More recently: Leah Stevenson, Tasha, Anne Howe, Catherine Kelly

Working Stiff - Lynne vs Dave

Lynne L-patin writes GeneRoss.com about her Dave Hardman movie "Working Stiff":

Thanks for the review.

I did indeed "sock Dave Hardman in the jaw" at CES 2000. Actually, it was the hardest ladylike slap I could muster in heels and my fur trimmed black silk chiffon party dress.

I, too, was shot for hours. Never having hit anyone before, it upset me terribly, and didn't feel nearly as good as I thought it would. I rushed out to doggie daycare, picked up my best friend and sped back to our room, where I called Luke (my second best friend), and gave him the story. He tossed it off with one line.

When the movie was in the planning stages, David was an integral part. He chose to absent himself from both the project and from my life when, for reasons known only to David, the relationship became too intense for him. Out of the multitude of ways he could have handled it, he chose the most destructive possible (calling in law enforcement) which violated every unspoken rule of pornographers everywhere -- Dave called the cops. Pornographers do not call the cops on each other. Certainly not because they don't feel like returning phone calls!

Before I went to Arkansas for my husband's family funeral services, Dave's putting his dick in me and telling me he loves me, and pointing out where in his back yard he's going to put my hot tub; when I got back, eager to finish the movie, he refused to return my calls. And calls the cops when I try to confront him with his reluctance to complete the movie!

And David's right: when we did the pick-up shots, after having humiliated me, I WAS a different woman. Before that, I loved the guy. My husband loved the guy. I thought the world of Dave. He's the most incredible sexual being I've ever known. My husband wanted David and me to stay together as lovers, as a couple. I wanted David in my life. I didn't care that he'd come over having been with three different women that day -- it was just a job, and he's the best in the world at it. I thought he was the most underrated porn performer of our times, and the only possible claimant to the title once held by John Holmes -- King.

But you can't have a restraining order placed on the producer of the movie, throw him (excuse me -- her, last time I looked) onto a chain gang and not expect a little resentment. And exactly what was it I put David through to make him react this way? Apparently the evil act was to call him from Arkansas and tell him "I miss you." I'm lucky he let me live!

After I was arrested and had to scrap two different scripts on account of David's refusal to cooperate, Luke and Cumisha graciously agreed to help me get the extra footage I needed to create yet a third narrative. Through the magic of editing, David comes across looking like a goof, and Luke gets the last word. But it wasn't supposed to be that way. Not at all. It was hard to edit the movie.

It was hard to watch David. Not hard to watch him f---ing other women -- I've always been turned on watching him f---, because he's so damn good at it and he's got the prettiest cock I've ever seen. But hard to watch someone I loved so much, and wanted so badly in my life, who chose to leave in such an ignoble way. Hurtful, painful. I remember telling Luke that all I wanted was to go back to before whatever made David call the cops, and Luke, serious for once, telling me, "I don't think that's possible."

I wrote, directed and produced "Working Stiff" as a showcase for Dave Hardman's incredible improvisational comedy and f---ing skills. I wanted to see him make that crossover into mainstream that so many of us in porn think we have the skills and the talent to do. Instead, I ended up bankrupt, with a criminal record and a very bad taste for the adult industry. The power of love -- ain't it amazing!

ALERT! The Legion of Steinberg Is Watching!

Curious writes: Men of l-keford.com and Lynne Lopatain I urge you to be prepared! On Tuesday we survived the first internet assault from Amy "Tough Jewish Chick" Steinberg and we were victorious! We easily repulsed Amy and her angry harpies from our site with a barrage of cutting insults and juvenile humor, however, I suspect that her first little foray into enemy territory was strictly for reconnaissance purposes. She has tested our defenses and is no doubt now analyzing our weaknesses. We can rightfully rejoice in our success but we must also remain ever vigilant lest the Legion of Steinberg catch us with "our pants down." Even though most of us do admittedly read l-keford.com with our pants down.

She and her hostile Jewish sisters may have retreated to the cyber-hills but, they are watching us. They want us to believe that they are out dating doctors ( BTW Amy, an appointment with your plastic surgeon to discuss you impending nose job is not a "date" ) and dating lawyers ( and going to your grandfather's lawyer to get a trust fund dispersal check is also not a "date" ). They are not! They are spying on Fort Ford waiting to pounce. Their beady eyes transfixed on their monitors. Their chubby fingertips, stained orange by countless bags of Cheetos, poised on their keyboards. Ready to strike!

We must circle our wagons members of the Moron Militia! Fred, you cover Archives! Chaim, you get Photos! Lynne, watch the Links! Evilstein and Rumdar, watch Stars and Subjects! We will defend to the death the last bastion of misogyny, racism, anti-Semitism and stupidity left on the net. Come and get us Amy Steinberg! We are ready! You can have my blow up love doll when you pry it from my cold dead fingers!

Lynne: Thank you, Curious, for including me despite my gender in the war against elitist traitoresses of my own Jewish heritage who would have us cease masturbation for the dubious joys of real sex (or rather, real celibacy for us hopeless loser types).

My undercover forays into their territories (malls and supermarket frozen food sections) lead me to believe that, by controlling ice cream supplies, we can make a dent in their forces through sheer emotional distress. Everyone, quickly, go to the nearest convenience store and comandeer the Haagen Daaz (especially the cookie dough flavor and anything with chocolate in it)! Hide it in your own personal home freezers! Soon, these women will be just where you want them, pounding on your door, begging for the opportunity to trade anything, even anal sex, for the highly concentrated butterfat to which they are all addicted!

Yes, You Are Losers

Tough Jewish Chick aka Amy Steinberg writes: Well, I see that the delicate egos of your readers have been bruised and soiled yet again. But this cannot have been the first time that a woman has done this to you, can it? I mean, other than a door mat, there can not be many things in life that have been walked over more often than the egos of males who live their lives through pornography.

Many of your readers have asked me to post a photograph of myself. No, I am not going to provide any of you with a photograph, or any personal statistics. Why would I - none of you is someone it is worth my while (or my friends') to impress. And do not act hurt or surprised. After all, all of you know that you are losers, and have known that for many years. So deal with the fact that you will only have my words and arguments to attack, and will be denied the easy ad hominem approach that is your sole collective forte.

As for you Luke, you have distilled all your hopes and dreams of a mate into a list that is hopeless. You have a null set of women to pick from, and you ought to know it. You want a woman tolerant of your role in porn AND who also lights the sabbath candles? This is a joke, right? No? Well, that's a shame, for while your list works as sixth grade humor, it does not work to suggest that you are marriage material for any woman, jewish or otherwise, of whom I am aware. And please stop using the memory of your deceased mother to win sympathy. Smart women, well taught by their mothers and fathers, can see through that a mile off. The only sympathy it is going to generate for you is from the males whom circumstances have reduced to your readership, all males who in life have had sex with a man's hand far more often than through a woman's touch.

Curious writes: Damn. Am I the only one who gets totally aroused when Ms. Steinberg belittles us? Thank you Amy. I just busted a nut.

Lynne writes Luke: I thought your list was beautiful. What you do with pornography is far from offensive -- it is revolutionary. An intellectual effort of which you may be justly proud. I am sorry about the "dissin yo mamma," which is very low class. Girls lose their Prada bags over such things.

The next thing, after your list of what you want, is to make a list of what you have to give. As a registered Narcissist, that may be difficult. Or do you see it as "I take, she takes?"

Putative writes: for amy steinberg: concerning your recent comments, i wonder, what is the extent of your jewish observance?

for Luke F-rd: what is the most sincere judaism-related verbal exchange you've ever had with a porner person? (i was wondering this today while grocery shopping. go figure.)

Luke: I've had quite a few. Can't pick one. Generally I find non-Jews (inside and outside of porn) more interested in my Judaism than secular Jews.

Curious writes: I believe I know the source of the rage that the humorless Ms. Steinberg harbors against you, Luke. Jealousy. You have what she so desperately desires. No, not a penis! A date with a Doctor.

Ben writes: Hi Luke buddy, I have a very clear picture in my mind NOW,after the letter she wrote on 01/6( AMY, the tough jewish chick) I have a very strong feeling,after reading her letter,that she does NOT come from an background of a upper middle class jewish family.To write into Lukes site and start calling guys LOSERS,is very UN classy and very UN jewish.I would like to say to AMY.If your going to TRY and use words that try and impress Lukes readers,at the very least AMY,don't let your finger slip and miss the word your trying to impress us with. Amy, it looks so sixth grade looking.(your words) not mine.Most of the readers on Lukes site,OVERLOOK, typing and very poor use of words,some of the readers looked up in a dictionary.But my god Amy! Yours ( NULL SET? ha ha ha,and HOMINEN? ha ha ha) I see a little trailer there,AMY? I know Amy,its hard being a female in a jewish family,the sons are GODS,while you do the house work.I can see why your BITTER,I have watched my sister do all the work,while my brother and I sit around.In most jewish families that's the NORM. I know why you won't send in a picture,us jews will just keep that to ourselves. GOOD LUCK TO YOU.

AVNLive.com

Check out www.avnlive.com. It's a QuickTime streaming site with/ behind the scenes footage, interviews, spotlights and reviews....but you must have QuickTime 4!!!

Greg Dark Will Direct Non-porn Movie

From scifi.com: "Ice Cube is set to star in Stray Dawgz, a werewolf movie for New Line Cinema, according to Variety. Music video director Gregory Dark will helm Dawgz, which is based on a spec script by Darryl Quarles (Big Momma's House). Cube will play a parolee who discovers that he is descended from a line of werewolf hunters. He must save his sister and San Francisco from a new breed of werewolves, the trade paper reported. Cube will segue to Dawgz after completing work on John Carpenter's Ghost of Mars, which he is currently shooting."

Cassidy writes on RAME about Kahn Tusion vs Patrick Collins: Does anyone else think this whole argument has less to do with whether or not this guy is a better director than that guy than it is a very basic difference in porn preference? On one hand you have guys that are at best indifferent to what's happening to the chick onscreen, as long as she has a cock in her ass and another in her mouth. At worst, you have the minority (I hope a really small minority) of guys that blew a load while watching a woman get smacked around in the Rough Sex series. I think for these guys, vids made by Anabolic and similar companies, videos in which woman are often treated as little more than attractive animals, will always be their cup of tea. And I think on the other side, you have guys that like it when a girl seems to be having a good time and is treated with at least the semblence of respect or at least decency. She's not just a walking, breathing hole some guy sticks his dick in. I think for these guys, Elegant Angel will always put out an attractive, exciting product. I know much of what I've typed spoke for itself, but I was getting so sick of reading how Collins can't direct anymore this and Tusion is pushing the envelope that. I think that's a bunch of bulls---. You either don't care about or like when a woman is treated like garbage or you don't like it. Style and directing flair mean nothing at a certain level. Martin Scorcese could have directed the Rough Sex vids. If the content was the same, it still would have been a big 'ol pile of s--- to me.

Jack Hammer Goes To Court

Jack Hammer has a preliminary hearing at 9AM Thursday to face charges that he made terroristic threats against female performer Robin Rose aka Doomie Moore.

Hammer, who has numerous friends in the underworld including with Hells Angels, has spent most of the last few years in andout of jail. He's facing 25-years to life because of California's strict three strikes sentencing.

As detailed on GeneRoss.com, Jack built a reputation over the past few months for executing frontier style justice on porners he felt were misbehaving.

Hammer told Gene Friday: "I'm in men's county jail right now facing 25 years to life. Back in January 2000 me, C.J. Bennett, Jill Kelly, Rayne, Ron Jeremy, etc. were called by Robin Rose, aka Doomie Moore to be in a documentary shot by European award-winning director, Craig Ross, Jr. Any of the pay would be done on a deferred payment concluding on the second week of February, 2000. The second week of February comes and no word from any of Ross' staff, Robin Rose, etc. Therefore, I started calling and calling and calling and only reached message machines..."

Remembering Earl Slate's Dec 21st Heroin Overdose

I talked by phone to Kianna Bradley Wednesday afternoon and her new boyfriend Marty, who resembles Ryan in many ways.

Kianna: "I've got somebody else here to talk to you. His name's Kevin. Remember when I told you about the OD and Earl [Slate] denied it? Here is the person who called 9-1-1."

Kevin: "Hey. He was dead. There was no doubt about it. He was purple. We called 9-1-1 and then started CPR. The EMTs arrived on the scene and administered something called 'Narc.' Something that counteracts the heroin. They went to town on him. It was at Phyllisha Anne's house. I'm a friend of Phyllisha. I was hanging out."

Luke: "And how did you come across Earl?"

Kevin: "I was helping Phyllisha Anne on the computer. I think she was writing you about the whole boob job issue [with Marty Foyer]. And then Kianna came running out hysterical, half naked, screaming 'help, help. I think he's dead. I think he's dead.'

"We went cruising in there and it looked like he was sleeping in his own vomit. It was a typical OD (drug overdose). I hate to say it but I've seen it before. He was what I would say is clinically dead. And we checked for a heart beat. I put a mirror under his nose. No air, no heart beat.

"And I wasn't about to give him mouth-to-mouth, knowing that he was hypodermic user. And unfortunately Kianna did [give Earl mouth-to-mouth]. And we started doing some chest compressions until the EMTs arrived. Then the LAPD.

"I guarantee there's a Field Interview card because they started doing FIs (a Field Interview card, which is a standard operating procedure for the LAPD). And Kianna started getting in their face."

Kianna: "I told them to f--- off."

Kevin: "Yeah, she was getting in his face and he actually called his sargeant."

Kianna: "And they were going to arrest me."

Kevin: "We tried to calm her down so she didn't get arrested. They started questioning us."

Kianna: "They said it was a crime scene."

I started by phone call with Kianna this way:

Kianna: "I got a new boyfriend. His name is Marty. No, he's not in the business though he works for Patti Rhodes occasionally."

Luke: "How's your court case with Earl?"

Kianna: "It's still for September 4th. I don't know what the f--- is going on, but f--- him. The guy I am seeing now has been sober for four years. So it is very cool."

Luke: "How's your husband Ryan?"

Kianna: "He's really good. Him and Marty actually talked on the phone the other night. It was funny. They get along wonderful."

Marty: "I met her at the Free Speech Coalition fundraiser at Bob's Classy Lady...

"Ryan and I have very similar interests. He accepts his situation. Seeing that he cares about her, I think that anyone who does is happy to have her away from what's his name."

Luke: "Is it difficult to have a girlfriend who's a porn star?"

Marty: "No, and you do not want to print my opinion on that. I won't tell you unless you [Kianna] leave this room."

Kianna: "What?"

Marty: "About f---ing women and f---ing and all that kind of s---."

Kianna giggles.

Marty: "You know what I really think? I think it is great to not have to worry that your girlfriend is out f---ing somebody. Because she is, so you don't have to worry about it."

Grand Marnier Induced Ramblings

Brandy Alexandre writes: Boy! Did I have fun tonight. :) Have you ever had a mental list of things you'd like to do someday if you could afford it? Well, just did one of those things. I have always wondered what it would be like to "buy a round for the house" at a bar. My best male friend, GT, is a bartender at a local watering hole on Wednesdays, so I thought I should celebrate my good fortune against my former employer by indulging such an "I wonder...." I bought a round and it was so much FUN I couldn't believe it. :) Not as expensive as I thought it would be, so I tipped GT and the other bartender EXTREMELY generously--another "I wonder..." It was over 50% of the tab.

I don't want to get all deep and philosophical here, but I think everyone should experience the feeling of just once forgiving their fellow man of their failings by saying or doing something that illustrates something to the effect of, "Today, *I* am okay and I want to share it with you." I'm not sure what came over me. This morning I was rear-ended at the bottom of a freeway off-ramp and she was so apologetic and sweet and nice I basically said, "It's all right." Miraculously--and I mean that--with a 15mph hit, there was not a BIT of damage to my car (though a little to my neck). For me to pursue what I would have every right to pursue, would have been nothing more than a desire to punish someone for a human mistake. Why should I attack her insurance company when all it would really do it raise everyone's rates by adding another collision to my area code upon which rates are assessed? Why should I punish someone who is probably the only other Los Anegels driver who is insured? After a confirmation from my most trusted mechanic that NOTHING was damaged on my car, I left a message for the hapless chick basically saying, "I think this one is a wash. Pass this "Get Out of Jail Free' card to someone else next time you have The Power and choose not to abuse it."

I dunno, Luke. Do you think I just need to get laid?

Lynne writes: Dave Hardman was no genius, but he was so much fun...still, he resented me and it came down to that he could never be in control, and he knew it, and you can see it when he says that I would have used the movie to humiliate him because he knows I CAN manipulate words and images. That's what I mean -- it's hard to love and trust someone when you feel they're superior in some way, and your self-esteem is low, and you're just waiting to be f---ed over. Which is why I told the therapist I wanted someone who stood on an equal footing with me.

Kendra Jade Says Chaim Amalek Is Crazy

Kendra writes: all i know is that he is definately crazy.any conversation or anything else that we supposedly hade is all in his mind and his mind alone. i have now decided to charge him triple. and also , lukey....he cannot say i am there with him as i am sure my boyfriend would attest to the fact that i am DEFINATELY not.

Fred: In an e-mail from Kendra Jade today (posted on your site), she said she would "charge him triple". Is Ms. Jade turning tricks?

Kendra: no, i am not turning tricks.i meant i would be charging him triple just to speak to me on the phone now because hes annoyed me so much.it started off free...but now i'm charging him cuz he keeps making up stories.so his bill is getting higher and higher ....and we have not even spoken yet.

Chaim writes: If KJ (and her "aide") continue to maintain that she has not even spoken to me, then who the hell are the two chicks who have been staying in my apartment?

Kendra: LOLOLOLOL.Chaim...i believe luke knows a good therapist or 2 :)

PS KJ child, I do not want to give you a difficult time, since cursed as I am with the gift of prophecy, I know more than I care to of future history. But for the sake of your fans, just what do you charge and just what do you charge for? Also, how does your "boy" friend (is this a cryptic way of telling us that he is black?) feel about such transactions? Have they made the two of your emotionally closer?

Kendra: No, my boyfriend is not black...and the whole charging thing was a joke...nobody got it apparantely. whatever.

Chaim: And why does KJ now pretend that she does not know me? Is she some sort of Jew-hating antisemite? Does she not remember . . . our intimate conversations at Casa Ford, or that time I took her out for dinner at Roy Rogers, and then our wild night at the Best Western?

I usually skip the stuff from web masters, porn kings bitching about billing, he-said, she-said stuff, etc. When you talk to people like this, what do you talk about that could be of interest to you? Why would anyone care what a "Camp Erotica" girl has to say, anyway? Ask some tough questions of her, like if you got her knocked up, would she have your baby?

Now, on to more important matters. Ms. KJ says: "No, my boy friend is not black..." So what do you have against African American men, Ms. Jade, that you choose not to have one as your current boy-friend? Is it something about the way they talk, or look, or smell, or act? Or could it be that you are a deeply troubled, prejudiced woman? I should not be surprised. First you attack the jews by charging me double (and then triple!) just to talk to you, when you know I only deal in wholesale prices, and now you reject the idea that your boyfriend is black. For shame, Ms. Jade, FOR SHAME!!!!!!! --Chaim Amalek, Liberal Jew

Luke: What do you read then on LF.com?

Chaim: The stuff the "Civilians" send in. Political commentary (seriously! especially when it comes from porners, as I have a jew-warped sense of humor), JDC, so-called bagel eating jew Marc Putative, Goddess the Trannie Gentile, NJG, stuff by former porners about their current problems with the cable provider, etc. I do not really give a s--- about what any current pornets have to say about anything (with the exception of Miz KJ, of course, as she and I go way back). If these broads do not like their current working conditions, let them flip burgers or petition the Teamsters to form a union local, or go to grad school to study physics.

Kendra: chaim is really insane, i think. i wouldnt be caught DEAD at roy rogers, and BEST WESTERN??? think again.and i know, this is getting repetitive-but i wouldnt sleep at best western if you paid me a million dollars. chaim...if youre going to make up stories, at least make them believeable. duh!

LOL.this is too f---ing funny.i have nothing against black men. i do not choose one as my current boyfriend because the person i love happens to be white.I am puerto rican, cuban ,french, and italian.there is not one prejudiced bone in my body.

YOU DESERVE TO BE CHARGED TRIPLE.YOU ARE IRRITATING ME.it has nothing to do with you being a jew.i wasnt prejudiced against luke.but then again, he is not a real jew.it just has to do with you being insane.thats all. ps.your rates are now quadrupled.

Now Who's Being Insane?

Chaim Amalek rejoins: Luke, my main closeted squeeze KJ writes to you: "chaim is really insane, i think. i wouldnt be caught DEAD at roy rogers, and BEST WESTERN??? . . . i wouldnt sleep at best western if you paid me a million dollars. "

So you are willing to have sex with Jerry Springer but "wouldn't sleep at best western if you paid me a million dollars."? Now who's being insane.

"chaim...if youre going to make up stories, at least make them believeable. duh!"

Sorry, KJ, but as you have already shot your credibility to hell by asserting that not even for a million dollars would you spend a night at a Best Western Hotel (Luke, aren't they nicer than Casa Ford?), it follows that I am telling the truth and you are in a desperate bid to deny it to your fans. The truth is beautiful, KJ! Why do you continue to deny the very deep and profound connection that we have established? Why do you concoct pretend white boy friends when we are so much more? Is it because you are ashamed to be seen in the company of a Jew from the Upper West Side of Manhattan? Is it my walker? My dentures? My stooped, 5'7" frame, or my harsh Noo Yawk accent? Why, Kendra, why??????

"LOL.this is too f---ing funny.i have nothing against black men." This is what almost all racists say if they have any sense at all. Have you ever had sex with the Blackman? If so, please contrast with the whiteboy.

"I am puerto rican, cuban ,french, and italian.there is not one prejudiced bone in my body." If this were true, you would not deny our deep connection. I mean, we are both Untermenschen, are we not?

"YOU DESERVE TO BE CHARGED TRIPLE.YOU ARE IRRITATING ME.it has nothing to do with you bei"ng a jew.i wasnt prejudiced against luke.but then again, he is not a real jew."

And I am? Well, I am, and there is nothing that I can do about that, is there? Or would you have me convert to some other faith just to appeal to your fickle heart?

"it just has to do with you being insane.thats all." It is immoral to discriminate against the mentally handicapped, so even if what you say is true, shame on you!

"ps.your rates are now quadrupled." Oh, so first you double them from nothing (so you love me after all!), then you triple them, then you quadruple them. I do not care if you n-tuple them, I will always interpret your rate card to mean that you won't charge me a thing, because I choose to believe the best of my fellow human.

Luke, I do not know what to do. Is it something I said? Yesterday I was kvelling, but now I am kneeling. Oh, the shame that has befallen Amalek!

PS Luke, do not publish this paragraph as it might get KJ in trouble. We are having a great time! And she really likes Zabars!

Luke: What is Zabars?

Chaim: Oy vey. If you were any kind of a secular jew instead of a torah jew, you would know. It is a non-kosher, gourmet shop on the corner of 80th and Broadway in Manhattan where the secular jews go to buy their deli meats, their cheeses, shrimps, lox, sturgeon, and generally kvell about what wonderful people they are and how smart their children are. Always very crowded, especially on Shabbas. You could get fat just from walking through the place and looking around. Kendra was enchanted by it.

Luke: Have you had sex with Kendra yet? Doesn't she give great head. The absolute best.

Chaim: Whyy do youu thinks it is sooooooooooooo dfifficult for me to tipe this?????????????

Caribbean Vacation

His Holiness Pope John Paul II writes on Rame: Thank you for pointing out that the pathetic Behind the Scenes feature was ACTUALLY RELEASED as a stand-alone feature on video (and was I sorely tempted to get it, too, but held out long enough to discover it was included in the DVD) entitled "Behind the Scenes: Caribbean Undercover". Avoid it! It plays like somonee's retarded kid brother with a camcorder on a family vacation. Wait, actually, it's much less interesting than that. Dumbf---er St. Croix also did another "Making of..." vid almost exactly like it and released at the same time but I forget the title...

As for Tera's abjuration of the lesbian lifestyle, I take you to the video tape, er, disc: at exactly the 36 minute mark, the cameraguy asks, "What about girls?" (Immediately before this, he had asked Tera about her favorite guys to work with, and she answered Eric Everhard), to which Tera replies, just a tad haughtily: "I don't do girls--at all." Pretty cut and dried there. She looked gorgeous for the three minutes the little interview lasted...Her only other appearance in the whole thing is getting spanked with one of those multi-tailed whip things about thirty times in something resembling a birthday celebration...Very badly lit, too.

As for her alleged lesbian scene in "Aroused", I haven't seen it, but I'd been sort of planning to get it, and I wonder how this failed to occur to me when I first heard Tera's denial. Vegas Vic, however, is of the opinion (in an archived AMRI review) that virtually all the lesbian sex in "Aroused" was simulated. Tera's comments seem to confirm this, too--and I note that "Aroused" is the only lez scene she's supposed to have done. Unfortunately, Tera was probably telling the truth. Wonder how long she'll last as virtually the sole hetero-only girl in porn...? Whatever the case, this gives me sufficient reason to feel justified in striking "Aroused" off my Must See List. Such a shame that Andrew Blake has been slipping so badly these days. Maybe Greg Dark can get him a gig as music video director...Better yet, he should do some perfume ads.

Australian Clamps On X-rated Videos

Taliesin writes on RAME: According to a Reuters article from May 30 by Belinda Goldsmith the Australia government has decided to not reclassify X-rated videos under the proposed NVE (Non-Violent Erotica) category. The reclassification would have allowed legal sales of erotic videos throughout the country.

The decision followed a revolt by the National Party -- the junior partner in the coalition -- which argued NVE was "a soft and cuddly" name to hide the exact nature of pornographic films.

Australia's sex industry has pushed hard to get the coalition to stick to a 1998 election promise to replace X with the NVE category, which would include about 75 percent of X videos, including those without sexual violence, actors under 18 or fetishes.

Fiona Patten, president of the Eros Foundation which represents the sex industry, said it would target the National Party in the next election, due by late 2001.

"We have access to 1.5 million people via our mailing lists and will lobby people not to vote for the National Party after this display of paternalism. We can influence elections," Patten told Reuters.

Brian Greig, law and justice spokesman for the Democrats Party, accused the government of bowing to the "disturbing influence of the Christian right" within the coalition. "As a nation, we are going backwards into a regime of tighter and unwarranted censorship with fewer rights to personal freedom and responsibility," Greig said in a statement.

Now comes the real test, friends. Does the Eros Foundation have the clout to do what it says it can do? This is, I think, really important world wide, because this is a major challenge for the Eros Foundation and for the erotica communities around the world. A major victory there could be used in suport of erotica in other nations. The question is going to be, Will the fans come out in protest of this move by the National Party? And will they vote them out of office?

It's one thing to talk about political lobbying; it's much harder to make something happen. This could be really important to all of us.

AdultDiary.com

Debbie Oakley writes: Juli Ashton, Shayla LaVeaux, and Nina Hartley have shared many things as friends in the Adult Industry. They would now like to share a new concept for an Adult Web Site with you. For the price of a single membership, members will have access to all three of these XXX stars, plus so much more. "Deb's Diary" is a first hand account of what it is like to live in Juli Ashton's guest room, house sit for Shayla, and hang out with Nina Hartley. There are XXX movie reviews, appearance schedules, travelogues complete with sexy photos that cannot be seen anywhere else, and Risqué News (It's not just news, it's Risqué). From the archives of Risqué Business come photos of Chasey Lain, Kaylan Nicole, Kylie Ireland and Taren Steele. Four very different writers give regular erotic commentary on philosophy, religion, politics, art, and science. A membership is a virtual backstage pass to everything that happens at Ashton View Promotions and Shayla Productions.

Dirty Debs Overkill

Ft writes on RAME: They just got in 134, 135, and 136 all today. Then I see some sort of Dirty Debs outtakes video that has a message from Ed something along the lines of "it takes 3-4 months to make a debs so I didn't want you to have to wait so long, here is some backstage footage, etc." On top of that it also seems he has switched to one of those Rodney Moore type camera lenses so its lost some of the "shot-on-video amateur" feel that the series used to have. Don't understand why he puts out so many tapes, the store I rent at used to get 4-5 of each when they were spaced out, now they get 1-2 since they come out so often.

Ahso Hashimoto Presents

Thom Burr writes on RAME: In a nutshell: don't buy this DVD . Only keep reading if you are or were thinking of getting it, or if you have more than a passing interest in Japanese porn...

First of all, I've always had a big thing for Asian girls, especially Japanese girls (and southeastern Chinese a close second). I suppose the only reason I took two years of Japanese in college was so that I could figure out how to read the couple copies of Beppin magazine that I'd jumped through hoops and paid $20 each for. I never did manage it, either (having to learn 2000 kanji is a significant disincentive, and it's something of a wonder to me that anyone in Japan or --in particular-- China can read anything more difficult than a newspaper...).

I don't think anyone here will blame me for my on-and-off obsession--Japan produces some the world's hottest softcore porn, particularly if one is a fan of waifs (as I believe I have so established...They even have a word for my syndrome over there: "rora-con", derived from their pronunciation of Lolita Complex), and I doubt there's hardly a porn fan out there who hasn't been struck at least once with yellow fever having fallen into lust after an inadvertent glance at an airbrushed AV girl's pic...

Unfortunately, much of Japanese hardcore porn seems to exist for the sole purpose of cooling one's ardor. Between the mosaics, weird sex toys, and oddly immature Japanese sexual mores, it's hard to watch any of it without having your fantasies totally dashed..This DVD is not much of an exception, but it does have one scene that reminds me why Japanese porn is still sometimes worth the effort.

The disc is basically a compilation from unidentified Japanese sources--they would probably qualify as gonzo or amateur by AVN standards. All 16 of the scenes are uncensored; there are none of the genital-blurring mosaics required for legal hardcore in Japan. The disc offers neither subtitles nor dubbing; all dialog in the actual sex scenes is in Japanese (they may be speaking Korean in one scene, however). The scene breakdown is: 5 with one girl and one guy, 3 with three girls and one guy, 5 with three girls and three guy, 2 oral-only scenes, and an 8 girl / 8 guy orgy. All of the scenes feature straight hetero sex only. No anal sex, no lesbian action (this last omission alone is enough to make the 3 girl 1 guy scenes close to unwatchable).

On the bright side, the disc does avoid one of the most annoying habits of Japanese porn: there are only three scenes with sex toys. Only a couple of the scenes have condoms. All of the girls retain their natural breasts and are untrimmed below. Virtually all of the climax shots are external, but there are few facials (maybe 6). There are a couple varieties of climax shots not seen much in US porn. Both oral-only scenes have the guy climax inside the girl's mouth, after which the girl lets the ejaculate drip/drool out of her semi-opened mouth. An acquired taste, I suppose, but I kind of wish we did this here sometimes...The second odd climax variety occurs in two of the 3 girl 1 guy scenes: after straight vag sex, the guy climaxes internally, then pulls out, removes his condom and dribbles the contents over the faces of the girls. I was not impressed (nor was I the couple times I'd seen it done in US porn).

The quality of the girls ranges the gamut from good to plain. There is, however, one girl who could almost rate as an AV idoru girl: Keiko, in the 3rd scene, who is an absolute doll. She's in a 1 guy 1 girl scene, and it far and away the best ten minutes of the vid...She's short, curvy, quite pretty, and very,very busty for an asian girl. Her guy actually climaxes twice during the scene...For the most part, though, the girls are not nearly the same quality that you see in Japanese softcore. I know this should not surprise me, given the fact that the same rules are in play here, but the magnitude of the looks gap seems to be greater of there...None of the girls are anything but uniformly unenthusiastic, at least to my eyes--they all close their eyes tight, avert their faces, and squeak discontentedly through the whole thing. At least the guys are less pathetic than the usual variety seen in Japanese porn.

Interspersed every four sex scenes or so is an idiotic bit with two guys, one big Anglo and another Asian, who purport to jointly host the video. The asian named Ahso dresses and acts vaguely like a WWII-vintage yellow-peril Nip, with coke bottle glasses and a bad fake accent (he sounds mostly American); the fat white guy acts like an obnoxious American (another triumph of method school acting). These bits obviously were sampled from the "Ahso Hashimoto Presents" line of VHS tapes. It's all pretty pathetic. One of the jokes: the white guy keeps mispronouncing Ahso's name as "asshole". Another: Ahso announces "You have to understand Zen to understand porno." A laugh riot, those two. They only waste ten minutes of the 2 hours and 20 minutes that the disc runs.

DVD picture quality is only slightly better than VHS. Lighting problems often make scenes either too bright and washed our or too dark and grainy. Sound quality is okay, better than VHS, but hardly great. There are absolutely no extras of any kind whatsoever. Unless you count the little skits with Ahso & Company.

Hope For Luke

Lord Peter writes: Dear Luke:

You want what you cannot presently get - a fine woman to be your bride. Instead of living the sort of life that could win the heart of such a woman, you spend your life in a fantasy world where women of worth tolerate what you do, and the only real women you interact with are Jezebels and abortionists descended from the Pharisees who killed our Lord Jesus Christ. But it is just a fantasy that will never be. You must defeat your fixation on pornography and return to Christ; otherwise, you are doomed to old age as a lonely object lesson of derision, taunted by the young women of the sort you wished you had married. As time goes by, you will appear more and more ridiculous in your shawl of shame.

But there is hope!

Visit http://abcnews.go.com/onair/2020/2020_000531_loveinaction.html

This is precisely the sort of program that you need. Many evangelical churches could help you, and I am sure that your father would be forgiving if you approached him. You are at a fork in the road, Luke. One way leads to misery, haunted by the souls of the unborn; the other leads to happiness with a fine Christian woman and happy children of your own. But only you can choose the path of righteousness.

Yours in Christian Prayer, Lord Peter Luther Christian, OBE

Lynne writes Luke: Would you believe I spent eight hours in the company of a male that desired me and nothing sexual happened?