Wednesday, May 24th, 2000
Marilyn Star
From www.vancouverprovince.com:
Kathryn Gannon -- the former porn star accused of insider trading in New York -- made a rare excursion yesterday from her West End penthouse hideaway where she has been living in fear of arrest for months.
The 30-year star of such triple-X hits as Smut 6 and Co-ed Dropouts, took a spin in the spring sunshine with her new husband, Vancouver stock promoter Michael Gilley, in his silver Mercedes CLK 320 convertible.
Gannon, who was born in Prince George and made a name for herself as porn star Marylin Star, has been a virtual recluse in her Beach Avenue home.
Late last month her co-accused, former lovers James McDermott and Anthony Pomponio, were convicted of insider trading.
Mr Marcus Rebutts Rape Rumors
Mr Marcus writes: Rumors, they almost seem to be a still lit match tossed in paper filled garbage can. A fire is sure to start and spread it will. Fortunately there are smart people who wait for all the information before rendering a decision and aren't quick to judge. We need more of those people. Unfortunately we make it to easy for the idiots to spread the inaccuracies sort of fan the flames. It's just that both have access to a computer who's who? courage behind the keys. Jenna [Jameson] a friend, you should not be quick to judge, but with the amount of different people your forced to deal with it's probably your best bet. I will always only promote positive, even when it's hard a sell. I would NEVER post some bulls--- like you being raped.
As I said before nothing needs to be taken, especially sex. As rumors go I've been the "victim" of a few myself, f---'em. Love that word. f---'em...I'm here the rumors are there, they never seem to meet, that's real. Just to let ya know I ALWAYS leave a way for anybody to reach me, I have four email addresses, three voicemail numbers, two cell numbers, one office line, and my dam house number and you think I would inaccessible. LOL...don't think so. I will always leave a link for you to respond. It's the un-American way. So don't get confused by the impostors (wannabe's). Be positive it might not be as interesting, but hell you can do as you please with it.
This is one of those rare times when I say thank you Luke for giving me the space to say my shi.....piece.
Ty writes on MrMarcus.com: "all i want to say is that jenna better recognize Mr. M, the man, or that biach will get the smack layed down on her.... zoe too..."
Troy writes on MrMarcus.com: "Jenna says on l-keford.com that she thinks black men are sexy but she has never wanted to have sex with them, black gals are another story, this gal is wacked out or just making excuses to get the heat off her. Zoe is a paranoid little freak, the hell with her fat dumpy savanah wanabee ass, she ain't nobody. Don't sweat those gals Marcus, you are the man."
Stevie writes on MrMarcus.com: "Jenna and Zoe are talking smack about Marcus on l-keford.com, so is luke, screw all them, Marcus is the man, those gals just need a good f---ing, thats all."
Mr Marcus writes on his own chat board: "It's amazing how things get so twisted on this board. People need to fess up to who who's and stop postin' all these fake ass names, that's real. Jenna was not raped. Wicked confirmed late this afternoon. To set the record straight. I tried to find out early this morning what happened. Some idiot posted this on my site saying and marking it me and s---. I didnt get a call back until this evening, so stop trippin. Get the lies and the facts straight. Dam."
Trading Tips From Jenna
Mike writes: I can't believe I just read that Jenna Jameson is offering online trading tips on her new site! Trading what-soiled panties?! Better to get your stock trading tips from the aliens of Vector Nebula.
Peter Hayes writes: Luke, I am OK - plugging away at my columns and destinations here in the UK. Sorry I cannot write for the column anymore..... Interesting Jenna Jameson story (shame it was false as per usual) - I had a good TRUE story about her being spoofed by British Comedian "Ali G" at last year's Hot D'or and shown on British TV a few weeks back. She thought that the interview was straight, but the guy is out to generate laughs for his hit Channel 4 show. Strangely Ali ( real name Sacha Cohen - yes he is jewish) got Jenna to say that she has had had anal sex - only not on film. So now you know...
Mdl writes Luke: Mr Ford; Sometimes you rock and sometimes you are a self-righteous prig. This is how it works. You take this:
"This is not blaming the victim. I place all moral blame on the perpetrator of rape and I hope that rapists goes to prison for a long time. But do women have any responsibility (not moral culpability) in these matters? For instance, by becoming known as a porn star, does a woman increase her likelihood of suffering such evil?"
And change it to this:
"This is not blaming the victim. I place all moral blame on the gossip that spread these evil rumours, and I hope that gossip answers to G-d, who understands how really evil gossip can be. But does Luke F-rd have any responsibility (not moral culpability) in these matters? For instance, does Mr. Ford*s trading in gossip increase the likelihood of such evil becoming manifest in the world?"
Now you can answer the question.
Cosmetic Surgery
Frank writes: Luke, I'm afraid that Dr. York's behavior is dubious at best. First, he's a cosmetic surgeon (enough said). Being a cosmetic surgeon qualifies him as a phlebotomist and immunogolist?. Is he even qualified to be a "plastic surgeon"?, or is he like so many others, just a podiatrist or ENT doctor that now does cosmetic procedures?. This doesn't even address the ethical questions surrounding how he came to be involved with the adult biz. The guy's not right. Dr. Peter Cheski, Sharon Mitchell's "implant innovator" was featured on an shill piece on Porndoggie 9 (KCAL TV) "news" tonight. The piece , one of KCAL's "Prime Assignment" sweeps crap, showcased Dr. Cheski's new "scar-free" implant method...which is to make an incision in the belly button and install them via a tube. Big freakin' deal, it's not new or revolutionary. Another quack made the rounds at least two years ago touting the same "new" procedure. And Mitchell calls him an "implant innovator" based on that?. How much does KCAL get from these docktors for the promo?. How much does Mitchell get in kicbacks?.
KCAL used all the same buzz words and PR terms foisted by the cosmetic surgery industry: hi-tech (sic), scar-free, scarless, new techniques, stressed the quick recovery time and also added doctors can also perform liposuction through the same incision. If that wasn't bad enough, for the only voice against the method, they had some goober on there saying silicone gel im! plants couldn't be used with the through the navel incision and advocating silicone gel implants as "better" (they're ILLEGAL since 1992!). Unbelievably, KCAL ended with: "but as with any surgery, make sure you do a thorough check on your doctor". Too bad they don't practice what they preach because Cheski would never have made it, neither would the many quacks they do infomercials for that they pass off as "news". Interestingly, during November "sweeps" they featured Dr. Marc Kerner doing a skin resurfacing procedure live on air. Kerner did Mitchell's face and nose and she pimps for him as well. He's been billed as an facial surgery expert, dermatologist and even I don't remember what all else...though he really is an otolarynologist (ENT).
Luke: I seriously doubt that Mitchell and Dr. York get kickbacks. They do what they do out of love for the industry.
Brandy Alexandre writes: On top of all that, Dr. York got his medical license in Mexico. I'm sure there is a seminar he can attend that will stamp him as qualified to perform plastic surgery, especially implants. Hell, doctors only need a one day seminar to be certified to do laser eye surgery! Why do you think I'm having it done in Quebec? As I said, some female talent sincerely objected to Dr. York having access to them from the beginning because he's a rabid fan bordering on stalker. That's just what I hear, anyway. I'm sure that the more intelligent ones know the difference between drawing blood and cutting them open and will steer clear of him. It's probably best that anyone thinking about his services check to make sure his United States licensing and malpractice insurance are all up to date.
Committee Hearing Reveals Complicity of Justice Dept. In Distribution of Porn to Kids
WASHINGTON, May 24 /PRNewswire/ -- A hearing before the U.S. House Commerce Committee yesterday demonstrated that children are getting obscenity (hard-core pornography) over the Internet while the Justice Department looks the other way.
Several witnesses before the committee complained that children have ready access to obscenity online, but the Clinton Justice Department refuses to enforce existing federal laws against companies that target children.
"By giving a green light to obscenity distributors who target our children, the Clinton Administration is complicit in this evil practice," said Patrick Trueman, director of governmental affairs for American Family Association. "Obscenity distribution to kids is a terrible form of child abuse," said Trueman.
Congress amended federal obscenity laws in 1996 to clarify that Internet obscenity is illegal. When pressed by Rep. Chip Pickering (R-MS) to name even one case prosecuted under this law, Clinton Justice Department officials could not name one. Nor could they name one major distributor of Internet obscenity when pressed by the committee.
"The obvious fact is the Clinton Justice Department sides with pornographers rather than children when it comes to the Internet," said Trueman. Patrick Trueman is the former section chief of the Child Exploitation and Obscenity section in the criminal division of the U.S. Justice Department during the Reagan and Bush Administrations
Luke Gets Mail
Refresh writes Luke: I have just recently begun reading your web page.. It's a wealth of interesting facts and gossip (as you probably know, since you run the damn thing).. I am a particular fan of your behind-the-scenes shots, primarily because I am attracted to kinda-slutty-looking girls that smoke. I have always been aroused by girls that smoke, and, as you noted in your essay about smoking,. practically all porn stars do it. Were you aware of the "smoking fetish?"... In any case, thanks... Also, since you are a pretty prolific fellow in the porn community (I presume), could you possibly make porn directors more aware of those with such a fetish?
I mean, I know they must have an inkling of it, because often on porn cover-boxes they feature the cover girl with a cigarette in her hand (presumably to convey a "bad girl" image, which is why I get aroused), but in the actual movie, more often than not there isn't a trace of it. I think that it could only help their sales (though they probably don't need any help anyway. How much does each video make? 5000%?), and certainly not hurt them.... So if possible, make more people in the industry aware... If you do a little investigating on the net you will find hundreds of sites dedicated to it (On the other hand, there are probably hundreds of sites dedicated to women that rub themselves in manure and then stick balloons up their ass.. There are some odd people out there..) Like you said in your essay, practically all porn stars smoke anyway, so why not let them do it before and after the scenes?... It is the classic image of the femme fatale (who happens to suck cock on camera)...
Also, and this is a completely different subject, but I assume you must have slept with more than a few porn stars... So I am curious as to who... I understand if you want your privacy in the matter, but considering the world in which you surround yourself, I would imagine it might not be that big of a deal.. So come on, kiss and tell...
Luke: I've slept with two and a half porn stars (one just orally) but never with Asia Carrera, who to my surprise, gets more hits to her site www.asiacarrera.com than I get to l-keford.com.
Asia replies: well duh, i look better naked than you do! (a couple photoshop lessons could help you fix that in no time though HAHAHA!!) i wonder how much traffic i'd get if i actually bothered to swap links, advertised on other sites, spammed newsgroups and emailboxes, or did ANYTHING to actively recruit traffic..? 'what's related' shows about 650 sites on the net link to mine - not bad, considering they're all voluntary links from webmasters who aren't getting a reciprocal link back!
Harri writes Luke: You think the nature of your site is the source
of your problems? No. It's not what you but how you do it. Say you
ran a site about...
Mike South Derides Luke F-rd.com Community
My friend, pornograper Mike South, has derided the close spiritual community we've developed on l-keford.com.
He writes Rikki Spence (rickispencer@the-enquirer.net) at the National Enquirer who's considering a story on us: "I suggest you rethink the focus of your article, to call l-keford.com a community is a real stretch and after answering these questions you had better at the very least be one hot looking chick!"
Luke: I am appalled at the lookism and sexism and agism inherent in comments Mike. Dear readers, please email Rikki in a tender, spiritual and polite way and give her the dish on our family.
Rikki writes: "Dear Mr South: Thank you for writing back. I am not yet sure what direction this article will take, or even where it ought logically to appear. One avenue that I am exploring (which clearly would not be for the Enquirer) is the use of the internet to create very specific, localized communities of people who care about someone that they otherwise would not give a moment of thought to. Luke F-rd appears to be such a man. That he has created for himself a community of totally (so far as I can tell) disparate people who concern themselves with his activities is one of the as yet unwritten stories of the internet age. (He appears to be the focal point of PST, judging from what he publishes from that site.)"
Mike: "I think you are more than a little misguided. First I am a channel operator on PST Luke is nothing more than any other person who enters the channel....come check us out and you will understand what I mean. While I consider Luke a friend (I have known him since before he started his site) I do not think of his site as a community, or even a dysfunctional family for that matter. It is not unlike porns own version of The National Enquirer, people who are interested in porn go there to read the latest rumors. a large percentage of Lukes readers are either industry insiders, seeing if they are being exposed, or people looking to see the literary equivalent of a train wreck.
Rikki: "To that end, I would ask you, to what degree are you concerned with Luke's life?"
Mike: "I consider Luke a friend and I wish him only good will, beyond that I have no interest in Luke's life."
>Are there any specific aspects that interest you most - for example, his love life,
Mike: He doesn't have one his finances, He is broke and lives in a hovel
>religiosity, employment, dietary habits, etcetera? How many times each day do you find yourself pondering what Luke is doing?
Never
>Is Luke the only person on the internet with whom you have such a relationship? Do you have similar relationships with people off the internet?
Mike: I have relationships that I have developed over the net, both with fans but I view it as little more than someone interesting to talk to while online, I can sit back and drink Iced Tea and carry on an intelligent and funny conversation.
>And finally, do you regard your relationship with Luke as wholesome?
Mike: I know Luke Personally, we have met in person and speak on the phone regularly, he is a friend, friends are wholesome but in the context of your question it probably doesnt apply.
From: Ricki Spencer
Dear Ms. L-patin:
Thank you for writing to me. I am not yet sure what direction this article >will take, or even where it ought logically to appear. One avenue that I am >exploring (which clearly would not be for the Enquirer) is the use of the internet to create very specific, localized communities of people who care about someone that they otherwise would not give a moment of thought to. >Luke F-rd seems to be such a man. That he has created for himself a >community of totally (so far as I can tell) disparate people who concern themselves with his activities is one of the as yet unwritten stories of the >internet age.
Lynne: He discourages us from having contact with one another, directly, too.
Ricki: I think it's a story for TV. An Entertainment Tonight segment, or even >classier. Or any magazine about on-line activities.To that end, I would ask you, to what degree are you concerned with Luke's >life? Are there any specific aspects that interest you most - for example, >his love life, his finances, relgiosity, employment, dietary habits, >etcetera?
Lynne: For the past year, I have been concerned with Luke's life to the utmost degree. I am a pornographer, and he's done a bunch of stories on me throughout the year. I find everything about him fascinating. All of the above. Mostly his take on pornography, though. That is very special. The other stuff is of interest to me because it lets me know who is offering his opinions. The Psychology of Luke F-rd. A never ending conundrum.
Ricki: How many times each day do you find yourself pondering what Luke is doing?
Lynne: Probably about every two minutes.
Ricki: Is Luke the only person on the internet with whom you have such a >relationship?
Lynne: Hell, yes! Plus I correspond with NJG and Goddess sometimes. But that's >because of Luke.
Ricki: Do you have similar relationships with people off the internet?
Lynne: No. Luke is the smartest person I know, so I tend to spend my time with him. For good or bad, Luke's been the focus of my life for about the last six months. I was widowed last year, and because I lived in LA and was so involved in the porn business, Luke and I ended up being great friends. He appears in my last movie which is releasing in hardcore on May 31, and is currently over at Playboy being evaluated for cable cut.
> >And finally, do you regard your relationship with Luke as wholesome?
My relationship with Luke is very wholesome. He's kept me sane through my husband's last few months and death, the betrayal of my business partner, and my decision to move to Oregon to go back to school and get out of porn. As his choice, the relationship has never been physical or sexual.
On the other hand, now that I don't need him any more, the relationship is changing. We're talking about doing some media work together, only he's never learned to collaborate. I'm really out of the porn business, and don't have any interest in doing anything more in that direction, at least not for now. I try to love him unconditionally, so I have no idea what's going to happen.
Prophecy of Doom
Chaim Amalek writes Luke: Given recent events in Lebanon, I may have to advance my time-table of Zionist doom by a decade or two. These jews have gone soft in the head. Might the sickness spawned by secular liberal american jews finally have infected Israel? It appears to have. (See the WSJ editorial appended to the end of this missive.)
Regarding your plea for help, things are not as bad as they seem - in fact, they are worse. You see, you are in the midst of a demographic/social trap that is closing in on you with the arrival of your 34th birthday. Until now, you have been able to play the role of boy-man living out a much extended adolescence with an acceptable level of social cost. The women you want to date, speaking purely in terms of age, mostly have not regarded you as being too old for them. I say "mostly", because some already regard you as a loser not worth the time of day. But certainly once you hit 34, most of the women you should most want to date as potential mothers to your children are going to start regarding you as too damn old for them.
More and more, and with increasing frequency as the years roll ever faster by, you will be directed by them to the remainder bin of spinster women, containing the diseased, the fat, the non-white, the infertile, the mentally ill and the ugly, the XXXs and the LL's who are nearing the end of (or are well past) their child bearing years.
These ominous trends are exacerbated and accelerated by your social status. The only way a man can avoid this demographic/social doom, other than by finding a suitable wife when he is young (which you have failed to do), is by obtaining sufficiently enormous amounts of status in society. (Think Ted Turner, who the Daily News reports is romancing a beautiful 28 year old academic. No menopausal meat for him!) That can keep you in desirable company all the way to senescence and beyond, if you are rich enough. But you are not a high status male. You live in a tiny hovel surrounded by people and jews who are much wealthier than you. Not only that, but what income you do have you obtain from a business that is generally considered to be dirty, even by liberal jews. I could see the merit of it if it resulted in true wealth (Al Goldstein, Hefner, Flynt, etc.) or endless sex with hot young women, but you are drawing just a middling salary from your activities, certainly not enough to compensate you for the loss in social status you incur every time you write about women who have sex with dogs.
As time goes by, these trends continue to work against you with ever greater force, even as you lose the ability to do something new with your life. Yes, it is tough to start anew as you get older and older, especially if you are indolent. If you think you are lazy now and set in your ways, just wait a few more years. The time to act is NOW, but you simply seem not to have the will to do anything but loll around all day in your hovel putting out a web site that appeals primarily to wankers.
So enjoy it! Accept that you are not likely to change, and look to the good things about your life. You get to meet porn stars and talk to their interesting boyfriends with whom they have sex and ask them what that is like. You get to see porn being made (is that like watching cows being turned into sausage?), and you can sleep late every day. Really, what more do you expect from life? Happy Birthday!
Chaim Amalek - Friend to Every Jew
Rant Of Redemption
Chaim Amalek writes Luke: Consider this my birthday gift to you, a rant of redemption. You live in one of the most media-dense areas of the globe, a place where thousands of media folk are forever scowering the terrain for an interesting story to tell, be it for television, film, print, or radio. And the one thing you have going for yourself is an interesting story to tell - the Luke F-rd story. But so far, the only ones to tell it have been those who cannot do you any good, either because they write for very obscure publications that only elderly jewish Lovestonite ex-intellectuals like myself read (e.g., the Forward) or because they are based in weird places like Canada. The Luke F-rd story has yet to be told in movies, on television, or in song. Now, do you mean to tell me that you cannot sell even one of all those moronic media whores out there on that story? For shame! The truth is that you have been too damn lazy to pimp and prostitute yourself as the situation demands. Very well. Leave Los Angeles and move north to Oregon to be XX's body servant, if that is the case. But do not soil the internet with your spinsterish whimpers of defeatest thought! Just what sort of Jew are you, anyway?
Now, pull yourself together. Peel yourself off of your soiled sheets and stand up. Be a jew and turn weakness into strength [apt metaphore deleted due to CA's moral sensibility]. God helps those who help themselves, and the same is true of those like Amalek, who try to live in God's image (but without the mass bloodshed and arbitrary disease). If you are willing to work at it, you can be raised from the sticky floor on which you lie to join the Kehila of prosperous, successful, blonde shiksa-goddess marrying jews of Los Angeles - the New Jerusalem. Amalek is willing to help (as he is always willing to help out a fellow jew, history not withstanding). But first you must declare your willingness to help yourself.
Shameless Pandering For Birthday Presents
Curious writes: Your shameless pandering for birthday presents is really beneath you Luke, but it works. Which would you prefer? Volume 1 of the new Gene Ross exercise video series, "Whipcord Thighs in 21 Days" or the Diana Roth artificial vagina complete with "wild and untamed" synthetic pubic hair?
Rumdar writes: Luke.. Kevin of PDT should realize that no one is this life is a saint. If so we would all be out feeding the homeless or defusing landmines in Cambodia. Anyone who clicks on to Luke must have at least a passing interest in porn. However, it is only Luke who brings up the tough issues. Where else do you hear that there may be a downside to the porn business? What do you read on other sites? Absurdities such as: Yes, I love taking three cocks up my ass at one time. It feels so good. Oh! Everyone in the business is wonderful. It is just another job.....like working at Starbucks. I am going to save my money and enroll in medical school when I retire. Yes, my mother and father know what I am doing. They are very proud of me. So is my leech husband...... No, I never use drugs. Only Luke addresses the human wreckage which is the end result of this sordid pursuit. But, Luke is not only porn. It is the deep thinking contributors who make Luke so readable i.e. Old Liberal Jew Chaim Amalek, Nice Jewish Girl, Putative Mark, Curious, Fred "the Hebrew" Lawyer and my new favorite Ishmael of Mecca. Incidentally Luke I think Mr. Ishmael is on to something. At the risk of sounding conservative I believe that if our American women dressed more modestly (and carried handguns) rapes would be way down. It is difficult for any woman to carry a weapon when all she is wearing are short shorts and a tank top. And while we are at it can I ask Mr. Ishmael what it is that passes for porn in his country? Do men rent videos of other guys having sex with goats?..just asking.
Lynne L-patin on Love and Community
Lynne writes Luke: Value of community you made easy -- it does take you back to childhood, when all the rules were known and you were the center of attention. Comfort. Strict religious observance. Natural.
We analyze a lot about why the women you want don't want you. Mostly we make stuff up. But why you don't want the women you have... obviously a question I personally spend a lot of time on.... Not because the women who want you are no longer a challenge, because any relationship is a challenge, especially for you. Whenever you have sex with a woman, she eventually leaves you. Whenever you get close to a woman, she leaves you. But then, if you don't stay close enough, she leaves anyway. Or are you so flawed that if a woman wants you, she's nuts? Madonna/whore complex? You get your nurturing from one woman, your sex from another?
Seeking some acceptance in a personal way from the community, a stamp of approval by one of their own? Knowing that on other levels you can never connect. That the most important thing in your life they find repugnant, which is one of the reasons you want them -- that they have straight values and are not tarnished by an interest in pornography, which nonetheless is important to you?
What about a doctor who used to be a porn star who you meet at synagogue and who doesn't tell you her past until the fourth date, when you each confess your sins to one another? Would you be turned off immediately, or would you think you'd found the perfect woman?
I don't think you are ready to get married. And I don't think a few dates would suffice for a woman to get to know you, really know you, well enough to accept your work, since you seek out women who by definition have rejected pornography for religion. Even though your approach to pornography is so atypical.
You want someone who treats you like I do, but who can't really stand you or what you do. You know what? I don't think it works that way... I think it's one or the other.
So you aren't ready to get married. The minute a woman wants you, the relationship ends. You want a woman who finds what you do despicable, and won't consider you a "catch" until you do something meaningful and mature. Which you don't intend to do. That relationship ends. Would you ever change anything about yourself for a woman? I don't think so.
Compromise, collaborate, egalitarian. Not in your behavioral lexicon.
All I know is that when I made the decision to go with Bruce, who expressed interest, and to stay as long as he was good to me, my life changed for the better and I was loved.
Why do you have this aversion to women who really love you? Like NJG and me? She says she's beyond really caring that passionately about you. My passion will slip away, too, as I lose interest in porn and in being so much of a social isolate.
And then how will you feel? Relieved? Sad? The heavy weight of inevitability? If I never give this woman what she wants, she'll eventually go away. But if I give her what she wants, she'll just go away sooner, because I can't really give it and she'll get mad and notice.
Oh, Luke. Whatever it is you do, it sure doesn't work very well for you. I hope a couple years of therapy helps. I just want you to be happy and have fun. "Fifteen going on eighty" seems like a lot of life cut out of the middle. But it's true.
MY new challenge for the summer is to keep on loving you, knowing you don't want me, but knowing that you aren't getting what you need from some of your choices. (The sex must be awful, or at least one-sided. Doing to, rather than doing with.) NJG says that this is the famous WOT. I pay attention to you, you pay attention to someone else, she doesn't pay attention to you, so you're back here.
What if I found a guy who treated me like I do you, and I could treat him like I do you? That would be a much happier situation for everyone but Luke. I know that if I went to a therapist, she would ask me why I want to continue this relationship with you and right now I would say, "I don't know." (I didn't say that to the Enquirer chick, of course.) Because I'm starting to return to normal after all the trauma of last year.
Funny, because I fell in love with all of you. If I date, they aren't going to be as smart as you, or as understanding, or anywhere near as pretty (who is?) but they're going to want me and respect me (as long as I don't share the porn. And everyone up here is tattooed). And I will have to make the decision -- I don't love them like I do Luke, but I shan't turn down a valid offer. Because all the passion in the world doesn't make up for love and respect on a daily basis, and the boring details of everyday life that people share are the heart of the relationship.
Speaking of which, I got my check from Zane. I bought a bed -- a bunk bed, actually. Full on the bottom, twin on the top. Room for Tobi and me on the bottom, room for storage on the top.
Luke Turns 34 On May 28
Ben writes: Hi Luke Buddy, I stopped by your site again.Luke! its your brithday and I see they (that nasty old guy and Lynne of coarse)are trying to depress you.This should be a happy time of year.Hell Luke,your still a young 34 year old. By the way,I asked my sister (she is a nice looking jewish girl) Why Luke just can't make out at the jewish single party?She said,you mean after the party?I told her you drive a VAN,you should have seen the look on her face! She said,Benjamin! You write Luke and tell him,"Jewish HUNKS,with a stock portfolio,do NOT!!!! Drive VANS.(Luke,next time park it down the street from the party) Now my mother thinks you should not have left home until your at least 30 years old.It would give you time,and some good jewish mother ADVICE,that only comes with being at home,where she can view,and question your dates on there intensions. But Luke,this is your brithday,go out and find a nice chick,have some GREATsex, or if your going out with a jewish girl,well just have sex,its really not that bad with your cloths on.
Email: In the Name of Allah the Merciful - Asalom Alechim!
One of your followers asks what sort of pornography exists in the Islamic world. It is precisely what exists in the decadent west, as it is only that filth which the west produces in its decay which is to be found in the lands of the Prophet, and even then only by smuggling. No pornographs are made in any land of the Muslim, as you well know. Oh hear me, you who debase your own daughters and sisters, the future is Islam, and in Islam you will have no future!
Ishmael ibn Abu of Mecca, Medina, and Al-Quds
Bondi writes: Hello Luke, I'm an italian guy, Max, interested on the gossips and rumours on Porn World of US. I always follow your great site, .....wow you're really my web-hero. Well, I wished to send this one to you just to say how I appreciate your job. More, I would like do some questions to you. Being myself a traveller to US, I come there almost every year, I'd like to ask at you to give me some informations about some pornstars that also do escort. Yes, I red all about what you wrote on the themes, but I ask if you can say more. i'll come to LA with a friend, and we'd like to enjoy some good chicken there. So, please, if you can give a some information, or indicate good links (overall regarding escorts), I'll thank you a lot.
The last question is the following. I found a site about Interracial GangBang, in which a society, the L.T.P., sells video; they haven't an e-mail, just a mail address, in San Marino, where send moneys (30$) each video. I sent them, but I didn't received anything. Well, maybe my money ended lost, anyway, do you know some about this'ghost' society. I believe to remember that the site is www.nastycreampiegirls.com
Well, that's all; ah, I wasn't in Cannes, that's so pretty, very beautiful women, I believe that US's pornstars are the best, definitively.
I forgot to say that Julia Ann is my favs woman; I would wish to meet her just to have a signature, and to see if she really is that piece of gorgeous woman. Do you think that's possible? Please, don't consider me crazy. I love the beauty.
Luke: She's all that and a bag of chips. You could meet her at CES.
Lynne writes: I got an "A" in biology. First grade of the term. I haven't been in school since 1982. Proof positive that total immersion in porn for over ten years does not rot the brain. If only my parents had thought to inculcate the religious values of my people and pay for my schooling. I could have been a veterinarian, joined your synagogue, and Luke would have lusted after me. I couldn't love you, baby, but then, you don't care about that! You need a woman who derides you for what you are!
I also got an "A" on my term paper. The teacher says I didn't cite (Ford, 2000) enough. And wants to know if I took my (Ford, 2000) quotes from interviews, discussions or ? I couldn't tell her that Luke steals from everyone and makes up stuff as he goes along.... Anyway, I'm celebrating. Oregon has no good champagne, so I'm glad I sent Dianna to Mazatlan for a few weeks, because she ONLY drinks champagne.
(You're very lucky she was in the Ladies Room when you showed up at the bar in Sacramento. Dianna is not modest -- she would have dropped her room key down your shirt!)
Oregon has great wine, though, and my plan is to get bombed. Hey, an "A" in biology deserves some celebration, and since I'm celebate! And I'm definitely going to get a new tattoo. How about a big Star of David, dripping blood? How about a beautiful Israeli woman, in combat gear, holding up a Star of David with light flashing off it? I need input! Where's Chaim when you need him? (And how come Jews can have nose jobs but not tattoos?) Our Sociology course is almost over. Just one more meeting.
We skipped over Gender & Spirituality really quickly in class. Watched a video on witch burning in Europe. A Holocaust that took place against women, led by the Catholic Church. They tried converting goddesses into "Mary." They tried to build impressive, conspicuous and NOT modest buildings, instead of allowing worship of nature in nature's own cathedrals. Then, to eradicate the last of the pagan religions, they murdered anywhere from half a million to nine million women. As a female and a Jew, I would have been very dead meat.
The book had a sub-chapter on Judaism. First it explained the great wisdom of Orthodox Jews. Put women into seclusion when they get their periods, and release them when they ovulate. Guaranteed immediate horniness! And as a woman, if you knew you would be secluded in two weeks, wouldn't you f--- your husband as often as possible during the time available?
The Jews knew how to manipulate women's sex drive -- too bad the Christians decided that the world was ending anyway and making women crazy with sexual desire wasn't on the agenda. The book also described feminist Orthodox Jewesses (I love a new oxymoron) and mentioned a book by D. Kaufman (1991) about women who convert to Orthodox Judaism called "Rachel's Daughters." Have you read it? It's available from amazon.com for $18.00. I would read it so as to conform my behavior to what you want, but you will never marry me anyway, so why bother?
Hey, I wake up every day and say, "Goddamnit, I'm still a bitch!" and proceed to let the world know! No, I'm still the same sweet, kind woman you once knew who loves you and only wants to nurture you into wellness.
By the way, Portland is infested with SDA's. I drove by a co-ed high school the other day. No co-eds were in evidence, though. I'm wondering, if I lurk about, will I have a fantasy right out of Max Hardcore? Are those SDA teen girls the epitome of sheltered baby school girls? Now that you've shared your 2 1/2 porn stars, how about the SDA babelets? Should a manly man, a man like Max, think of conversion?
I need to choose a health care provider, and there's an SDA clinic down the street. Will they reissue my prescription for Prozac? And how do they welcome new worshippers? Think of the research on your early childhood psychological deformities I could do! Think of the trouble I could make! Because the local Jews won't even answer my e-mail!
You must love that isolationist aspect of Judaism. That they really don't care if you show up or not, and that they have minimal interest in your life (as long as you pay your annual membership dues.) A religion where everyone keeps their noses out of your pants. NJG says I should never have blown the rabbi...but how could I have resisted? Any guy who pulls his dick out in front of the Sacred Ark DESERVES a blow job, don't you agree?
(Yes, publish that I blew the rabbi, but not that it drives you insane
with passion. And yes, I am indeed hoping for a period any second,
wanting to retain my youthfulness. But I have not been able to bear
children since I had my tubes tied, after four abortions, after bearing
my daughter, stuck inside a marriage in which rape was the only sex
act, after conceiving with an IUD and hearing my husband rant about
what he would do with a deformed child. I, too, want marriage and
children. But I'll buy my own picket fence, dammit!)