Sunday, May 14th, 2000
Happy Mother's Day
Goddess writes: Luke, there is too much on your web site from men most women do not dream of screwing. (Exceptions--Mike South and (sigh) Gene Ross.)
It would be better if every day's effort included some playful banter with a verifiably sexually desirable (i.e. young--see above exceptions) man. (Again, this excludes men who can't identify a woman if they fell over one.)
And stop--STOP--publishing anything remotely male chauvinistic. It is bad for my ovaries.
P.S. All of this male chauvinist stuff reminds me of a joke I know: Q. How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?? A. 16 men and 1 woman. The woman must first locate the bulb and hand it directly to him, then it takes the one man to screw it in and the other 15 to stand around with their hands in their pockets watching.
By the way, I learned this joke (and more!) from associating with men on a daily basis!! No offense is intended by any of the above comments.
OOPS, forgot to add: Truly one of the joys of life IS learning to laugh at oneself, but an even bigger joy is poking fun at Chaim.
Lynne writes: Goddess, I never noticed that there were any men at this site worth screwing other than Luke, but I agree, we need to encourage a new group of AVAILABLE MEN (meaning that not only are they young, they're in good enough shape to get up, turn off the VCR before we have sex and THEN keep going all night). Did you really get your babies from a vibrator, or wasn't that something for which a man was required? Not that men are good for much other than making babies and bringing home bacon (or, in Luke's case, an occasional matzoh ball.) Goddess isn't the only woman who's never had a REAL MAN -- I hear the last one is on display at the Ripley's Believe It or Not Museum on Hollywood Boulevard. And why does Ben think doing yoga while cutting onions make our attitude better? Ben, if we could find REAL MEN, we'd be too busy having our pussies eaten to waste our time laughing at you poots and your archaic, porn-inspired attitudes!
And Ari, why would being fat and ugly disqualify one from insulting guys? Only the young and pretty should insult guys? Guys are so easily insulted, it's like shooting fish in a toilet bowl. And they're slow -- the only insults they can come up with are "fat," "ugly" and "old." How unoriginal! A REAL MAN would be far more creative, but then, REAL MEN are too busy getting laid to waste time insulting women.
Ben writes: Hi Luke, I just read what (Goddess) wrote on your site.I just can't let her get away with putting us males down like she did! Im sure she has never had a real man in her life.No Goddess! the latex ones can't mow lawns. Have I got the cure for your bad attitude! 30 minutes on your knees,eyes watering,one hand behind your head,teaching you how to be a real women. Here is a joke for YOU: Would you know if your dildo was pluged in? NO,I never had sex any other way. If you ever do find a real man,you will find out,males are the KING of the jungle.
Ari writes: Goddess, you are pretty quick to insult guys. Besides the screen name "Goddess", what proof do we have that youre not fat and ugly yourself??? Why dont you send Luke a pic (you can cover your face) and have him post it. THEN we can decide if you have the right to criticize men.
Goddess writes: Dear Ben and Ari, I found it interesting that you took MY post as an insult. Did you not realize that I used Chaim's EXACT post from yesterday, in which he had no problems insulting women, and changed the wording?? Turnabout is fair play, boys.
Brandy's Settlement With Forest Lawn
Hank writes: "Luke, here is the number for Brandy.... $350,000.00 minus 33 1/3 to her attorney. Not a bad chunk of change ..From what she tells me first thing she is getting done is the eye surgery, then she is going to use the rest to start up a new porn video company producing her own line of videos. She does insist that while she may from time to time do a scene, most of her work will be from behind the scenes."
Mad Jack writes: I hope she lives well off her settlement because I know for a fact the 99.9% of anyone involved i the boz would not touch ANY product that she produced...Take care Brandy, and good luck with the eyes(aren't they the window to the soul?)
Brandy replies: Found out Mad Jack is really, really, wrong. Okay, maybe, just for the sake of argument, no one in the biz would touch my product, but I guess that's why people start their own companies. Take it straight to the people and everyone else can cut off their nose to spite their face if they like. LOL! Turns out a number of people believed whoever this Hank person is and emailed me that they are thrilled I will be producing movies again saying effectively that there is too much s--- in the market there aren't many lines you can trust to put out watchable product. I had to explain that I don't know who Hank is, don't know where his figure came from, or why he made up such an incredible lie. At least it helps me know who is full of s--- on your site and who isn't. I used to believe some of the things that were submitted by him. Now I know anything with his name attached is garbage. The last time I came into any kind of money I quit my job and got into porn (and Charlie Biggs still owes me money). I'm not likely to do that again.
Hymie: Read between the lines of her message...She speaks of why someone would start a company and all the people that wrote to congradulate her on starting a company....She met Sunday with 3 porners whom I'll name later that will be in her first project..She is also speaking with a highly regarded cameraman to shoot this first movie... I think if you hammer your boy Rob Spallone he might confirm this as he is the OTHER person who knows of Brandy starting a company and is helping her on the QT.
Luke: I am positive that Brandy will NOT be making porn films nor starting a porn company. Nor discussing the details of her settlement.
Zanzibar writes: I found the thing about Brandy interesting. I don't think Brandy is really stupid enough to start a porn company up this late in the game. There are allready too many established porn companies out there and too many movies. It doesn't seem like profits would be very likely. Also I doubt that if she did start a company she would be involved with a crook like Rob Spallone. He has little sense and produces some of the worst movies around. Did you see Sopornos? What a joke. If people were calling her its more likely they after her money and not her talent anyways. The one film I have seen of hers that she directed and produced was pretty bad, but hey it had Tiffany Mynx. Anyways good luck Brandy, hope you are as smart as you try to make yourself out to be.
John Wayne Bobbitt's Penis For Sale
Click here and it reads: "That's right John Wayne Bobbitt's penis is for sale. Well, actually it is the prop penis John used in his comedy act. This prop was shown on the Howard Stern Show. John signed his penis as well. John had used the prop at the end of routine where John would tell the crowd he new the real reason they all came to see him was because the thought they would get a chance to see his penis, John then would pull the prop out of pants wait a minute then let the penis drop to the floor and say he hated when that happens. He would also throw the prop to an audience member and tell them to go F*&% themself. It is pretty realistic prop "
Ben writes: Hi Luke Buddy, All these middle aged horny women like Lynne,think all guys are "EASY" Luke,you played it just right.Does Lynne think,?, after driving all day and into the night,A guy feels like sex? Im glad you left her sitting in her PUDDLE,at the bar. Talk business? I don't think so,not at that time of night.Luke all she wanted was your BODY, You make this jewish guy proud Luke, (later Baby! Nice). Im looking for a video of Lynne (Diana Roth)having sex,she can talk the talk,but can she walk the walk? E bay its GONE! Im sure Chaim Amalek beat me to it. Luke,it may have have not been one of the better videos Lynne has been in. Chaim's heat is still beating I see.
Lynne writes: Driving all day and into the night? >From L.A. to Sacramento? Ben, we're talking about 2 p.m., not a.m., and I wanted lunch! Does the expression, "Let's do lunch" really mean "I want to blow you?" Luke, your Kosher salami would have looked good on rye with mustard at that point! I remember when the debate was, "If a guy buys me dinner, why does he expect me to screw him?" We women solved that problem nicely -- we went out, got jobs, and offered to pay our own way. "No" really does mean "no," and "lunch" means "lunch," and I don't rape confused journalists for dessert.
Thanks, guys, for tracking down the movies for me. I didn't want to set up an e-Bay account just to LOOK at myself. For those of you who like the back stories from behind the scenes (and I was 42 when the scene for Mature Women #23 was shot), the photographer put me and the male performer in the car and drove us around in Topanga Canyon for an hour looking for a place to stop and shoot.
My partner, Mark Wood, was young and inexperienced in the ways of porn. He got hard right away, but after an hour of meandering driving and cocksucking we were both bored and disinterested. We were returned to the house and with my husband's help (he talked us both through the rest of it) managed to have very uncomfortable sex involving cars, concrete and condoms. Nice young man, but grueling work for both of us. Makes one appreciate boring vanilla sex in a soft, comfortable bed!
I did four scenes for these producers after Bruce lost his job at Heatwave. They are into the "instant anal" school of filmmaking. You know, put a little lube on the asshole and dive right in. Not conducive to pleasure. Out of the four, the best would probably be the one with Rod Fontana, if only because, as a professional, he kept the sex rolling. I think the scene I did for Totally Tasteless Video for the Bogus Brothers should be better. I remember that as being a lot more fun, and very orgasmic, and non-anal.
Angela de'Angelo, formerly Sukoya, also in Mature Women #23, has always been one of my porn heroines for the way she conducted her gang bangs (talk about pushy women who AREN'T Jewish!) I put her in a scene with Dave Hardman for "Working Stiff," scheduled for release May 31st through Zane Entertainment, which features a pale, chubby-faced Luke F-rd making dire pronouncements about the future of porn performers in general and Dave Hardman in particular. Luke-aphiles will be able to get it direct from Zane in a few weeks.
Luke is looking much better now than he did last September, tanned and lean, and I look better, too, than I did two years ago. I've lost weight and firmed up quite a bit. More tattoos, though. I'm going to be the best looking lampshade at Auschwitz when it comes time to shoot Holocaust, the Second Armageddon. As to the Depends joke...not funny. No, not at all. You guys can do much, much better.
Respect For The Ederly Porn Style
Amused writes: Here's the update on the Ebay auction of Lynne Lopatain's porn DVDs. 10 sets of Mature Kink Vol. 1 and 2 were available at auction. 3 sick, twisted, lonely, depraved souls bid and won at $30, $30, and $29.
Anyway I wanted to share the copy on the back of the box of Mature Kink 2 it is pure comic genius: "Ever wonder if your grandma gets f---ed in the ass and then gets down on her hands and knees to beg for more? Well, the answer is yes because we have no problem finding older women who are true porn pigs. Fresh from the old folks home to your VCR, these mature women get f---ed in every way possible. It's truly disgusting to watch, but I bet you won't be able to take your eyes off of it." Right below it is a photo of Lynne sucking a fat pink cock corn on the cob style.
BTW I've got a joke for you. Q: What does Lynne Lopatain's pussy taste like? Give up? A: Depends!
Luke: Amused, I'm glad that you find it funny to perpetuate sexist agist stereotypes. But when I deal with people, I see past appearance to the heart. I drop prejudice and embrace people on the basis of their character and soul. I have a dream that one day white children and black children and middle aged white women will play together...
Pat Riley: Listen, old biddies are not erotic. Mrs. Robinson was not erotic. The scenario in The Graduate was terrifying rather than erotic and I saw the movie when it first came out so I'm not saying that with 20/20 hindsight and a jaded view caused by viewing thousands of pornos. Of course if you want to screw your mother...
Lynne: Pat "Pedophile" Riley actually makes a good point. Mrs. Robinson was NOT erotic, and the scenario in "The Graduate" was indeed terrifying. Any unwanted advance is scary, whether it's from an older woman or a gorgeous but obsessed stalker. Fortunately most older men see older women as peers, not "biddies," and take advantage of good sex when and where they find it, rather than jacking off and dreaming of the teenager girls they didn't have back when and WILL NEVER HAVE AGAIN!
Diana Roth Stars in Mature Women # 23
Here's the ad copy: Savannah, Angela D'Angelo, Sarah and Diana Roth spread their graying twats for hard cock. Anal friction. Great blowjobs. Nonstop f---ing. Deep close-ups. Older women make the best sperm dumps. This video is the proof! A sizzling quartet of overripe tomatoes fills the screen for a shameless lesson in f---ing. Angela D'Angelo, Diana Roth, Sarah and Savannah are hot little prickteasers who lost their morals years ago. Now they're living cumbags and the viewer is the winner. See them get what they deserve in superclose-up, rock hard action. The only thing these cunts are good for is taking a burning load on their f---ing faces! They get bold when they get old. Savannah is a thick bodied blonde with big, natural jugs and a still pretty face. She looks like that lonely housewife you saw last week fondling the bananas at the supermarket. The gardener shows up with a leafblower strapped to his back but he's the one who gets a sloppy blowjob. In the house, he f---s the s--- out of Savannah in every position until her shoots cum on her hangers. The raunch-o-rama continues with Angela, who must have passed out drunk in a tattoo parlor one night. A great looking Italian-American in her early 30s, she's a true backalley hellcat in bed, sucking and f---ing in an award winning performance until her navel is covered in stale jizz. Sarah is a black woman in her 40s with enough meat on her bones for two men. Her black lover nearly rips her fat ass apart with his long pole but he saves his load for her chunky face. Diana Roth will never see 45 again but she'll be seeing hard cocks until her uterus falls out. She blows a guy in a car, then her cunt finishes him off in the garage. Magnificent filth with the horniest mature women desperate for cum.
Nice Jewish Girl writes: Luke you said: "You push too much, with david and with me and probably with others. Pull >yourself together and don't ask more of people then they are ready for... "
Luke, why do you like Jewish women then?? If you don't like pushy women, why like jewish women? This is exactly why you will never be a real jewish male, that and, well all the racist/nazi stuff. Really Luke, you should really reconsider your fetish towards us Jewish women. We are pushy, we are demanding, we are needy. All of us. No matter what we look like. Some more attractive, some less, but it's all push push push to men. So, if you don't like it, don't pretend, don't lie and say you like us. Because you don't really. And Rumdar, puleeeeze!!! I am not premenopausal, what a sexist idiotic thing to say!
Actually I think I'm premenstrual today. And Rum, where is Your Pic??? You've seen mine...and how old are you? You sound like you have an Asian fetish thing going. I remember you said you were in Bangkok, were you with underage girls there?? Girls sold into sex slavery btw for a can of peas. Hope you feel good about yourself. Whenever you talk about some chick/s of yours, they sound like you have to pay for them. And Rumdar, please take the above with a grain of salt, I'm just having fun with you...I do like you and Fred.....just remember I'm dangerous when I'm pre-menstrual. Love, Nice Jewish Girlie with An Attitude!
Amused writes Luke: Please confirm if, like most B grade porn starlets, Diana "Lynne Lopatain" Roth will be appearing at the Moonlight Bunny Ranch anytime soon. I am eager to test the ad copy of Mature Women # 23 that promises: "Older women make the best sperm dumps." Thanks. ps Chaim, if it's a go do you want to car pool?
Lynne replies: Amused, I thought that ad copy was so perfectly misogynistic that I quoted it in my term paper. But you forget, I am sworn to celibacy for the next eight years, while I wait for Luke's psychotherapy to kick in. It would be terribly unfair and completely unethical of me to take advantage of his emotional disabilities and have a good time without him.
Lawrence might check to see if Toby Dammit is still up and running at http://www.smutzine.com. He will have all the info needed on the Chemical People. I knew Jack Baker toward the end of his life. A sweet man who took all the wrong drugs.
Lynne's Reflections on the FSC's Lobbying Days
Lynne L-patin writes: was not the lobbying day, as you mistakenly posted. It was the workshop day. ]
As you and I discussed Sunday evening, I went ahead and changed my departure time to give myself Monday afternoon in Sacramento in hopes of connecting with you. Your knee jerk attempt at putting me off again ("I'll call you at the room at noon") wouldn't have worked -- I had to check out of the hotel by then, as I told you.
I'd spoken with Kat Sunlove, whom I'd never met, by telephone before the event, saying that I was a student doing a term paper on porn and asking if I could attend to pick up some information for my paper, correctly assuming that she does not read l-keford.com and did not know who I am.
Sunday evening after the public event concluded, I went up to the podium to say hello to Bobby Lilly. She recognized me and was surprised to see me. She wanted me to come to the dinner with her, because she didn't know if I was registered for the conference or not, but she knew from the days when I was involved in the AVA that I've always been a willing participant in industry activism and that I know my stuff, and that my input, if not always "party line," is thoughtful at the very least. I said no (I really wanted to find out what had happened to you), and that I would catch up to her in the morning.
In the morning, I went to the meeting room to see what, if anything, I could bring to or learn from the rest of their program. Finally met Annie Sprinkle as I found her looking for the room, led her there and introduced myself. We discussed me sending her some movies to review. I attempted to find out from the early arrivals what the schedule was for the day, so I could plan to see you as we'd discussed, as well as my old friend who lives in Sacramento.
When Kat came in, I introduced myself and explained that I was not just an anonymous student, that I was, well, me, and wanted to find out what was going on. And she said, "You can't be here. This is private. Registered participants only."
I further explained that I basically knew everyone in the room, that they knew me, that my FSC membership was in order, and that I wanted to register or whatever for anything I could, since I hadn't learned about the event until I read about it on l-keford.com on Thursday and that simply being there was a spur of the moment thing for me, but that I would like to participate. By this time Bobby Lilly had arrived, and attempted to join the conversation.
"No, absolutely not," said Kat. I had to leave. Okay, fine, I replied. "Did you get what you needed for your paper?" I guess so, I said (although I hadn't at all....) What time do you break? And at this point Kat got rude. "Why do you want to know?" Thinking quickly, I said that I had brought some tapes to give to people. "This is not a place to do that. That should be done privately." Yes, I arranged to do that privately, but what time do you break so I can meet up with people and give them the tapes I promised?
"We don't break." You don't break? No bathroom breaks? No lunch break? At this point Kat invades my personal space, and she's bigger than I am, so she's trying to intimidate me. Bobby is at her elbow, trying to be reasonable, but can't get a word in edgewise. "Why are you so tense?" Kat asks in a smarmy voice. I'm not tense, I'm just trying to find out when you have a break, and you aren't answering me." This goes round again. "Why are you so tense?" Because I've just spent twenty minutes trying to get a straight answer out of you and you won't give me one. Finally she breaks down and tells me when they expect to break for lunch, but, of course, I don't really care. Still, I thank her and tell her I'll be back at that time.
Instead, I go to the restaurant for breakfast, see Mark Kernes (who refuses to acknowledge my presence though he was perfectly reasonable Sunday evening,) check out and spend two hours sitting in the lobby reading "Beauty in History" (which I really wanted to show you) and start leaving you messages....again. Eventually my friend shows up and takes me to lunch and that's the end of it.
I can only assume that between Sunday evening and Monday morning, I've been identified as Luke's buddy and therefore as the enemy. Which, as I said to you previously, is ironic, because you were treating me the same way.
As LT, Farrell Timlake, and Amused (just to mention a few) point out, if the "official" spokespeople presented both sides of the issue, l-keford.com would be nothing more than an occasionally interesting source for porn gossip. This same small group of people have patted themselves on the back for ten years and accomplished nothing except the elimination of dissenting voices within the industry. My sociology textbook is proof of it.
Let's turn to the Miller test for obscenity for a moment. In order for something to be found obscene, and therefore not protected by the First Amendment, the material must meet the following criteria:
"The average person, applying contemporary community standards, would find that the work, taken as a whole, appeals to the prurient interest. The work depicts or describes in a patently offensive way, as measured by contemporary community standards, sexual conduct specifically defined by the applicable law. A reasonable person would find that the work, taken as a whole, lacks serious literary, artistic, political, and scientific value."
The key word in this definition is "prurient." "Prurient" does NOT mean an interest in sex. It means specifically "an unhealthy interest in sex." Normal people SHOULD be interested in sex. It's part of life, a biological drive.
The use of contemporary community standards allow for sociological change, so that various sexual behaviors can be seen as healthy or unhealthy given the time and place in which they are under discussion. In a culture where women are expected to have no interest in sex, a video showing a woman initiating a sex act would be prurient. When homosexuality is considered a mental aberration rather than a tolerated sexual variance, homosexuality is prurient.
Separation of church and state excludes religious definitions of healthy or unhealthy sex, so we turn to the secular for our definitions, and even though sex which focuses on degradation or humiliation is most probably prurient, those feminists who claim all heterosexuality is degradation are themselves prurient, because contemporary community standards are in disagreement.
To me, at least, the question of obscenity vs. protected sexually explicit material is quite clear. Before one can define a prurient interest, one must have a healthy interest. No interest at all is no more healthy than the desire to see women hurt is healthy. If one really thinks Chaim Amalek's "joke" (Q: How do you make a woman have an orgasm? A: Who cares?) is funny, one's sexuality is prurient. Sexuality which excludes pleasure on behalf of one of the participants is not healthy, whether it's a personal act or a societal doctrine.
Let's present a few more examples: Having anal sex until your anus prolapses is prurient. Calling a prolapsed anus a "colon rose" is prurient.. Advocating that condoms NOT be used is prurient. Sucking cum from someone's anus through a straw is probably simply stupid. A gang bang where the woman is in control is only prurient if it is assumed that mentally healthy women couldn't possibly want more than one partner, which is an incorrect assumption. A gang bang where the woman is drugged to the point of non-participation is prurient.
Contemporary community standards allow for women to make sexual choices, enjoy their sexuality, expect pleasure and explore new pathways of sexual delight. And I am thrilled that this has come to pass. The First Amendment gives me the right to strip naked, enjoy myself and make a political statement, all at the same time.
The next question is: Why do AVN and the FSC promote material which I could pull off the shelves and have prosecuted for obscenity? And the question after that is: Why don't people in communities everywhere go into adult video stores, pull the prurient material off the shelves, and prosecute it? Why do we, in the adult industry, want to make it an "all or nothing" issue? Either all of it is protected, or we lose our right to sexually free speech? This is simply not a valid argument!
Anyway, opinions like these are I'm excluded from so-called adult industry "free speech" discussions, and why Luke F-rd is demonized for maintaining a platform where opposing views on pornography can be presented, uncensored. Really free speech.
For NJG, and anyone else who wonders why I put up with Luke F-rd's strange and ambivalent behavior toward me on a personal level, it's because ultimately any personal relationship Luke and I may have is secondary to our mutual interest in the issues raised by pornography, and in facilitating free and open discussion on the subject. He can keep up with me intellectually, even though he's emotionally retarded like the vast majority of his gender, and he gets my jokes. I would love him dearly for these things alone, even if he were fat and sloppy and had bad acne scars. And he knows it. And he likes it. And I find that very satisfying.
I'm sitting here with my friend, Natasha, discussing daughters lost to the court system. She wanted to see how e-mail worked, because her daughter has tried to contact her through e-mail and relatives. In this case, unlike mine, the daughter wants to contact the mom but cannot because her home situation won't allow it. So we're brainstorming about what's best to do, and I'm showing her how e-mail works.
Anyway, Natasha and I were talking about her having been in a bar last night with her boyfriend, and that he was treating her like one of the guys, and not a date or a girlfriend, and that it bothered her. And it occurred to me that your avoidance of the situation entirely might have some similar motivations. Because it's a progression, right? Buy a girl a vegetarian burrito and the next thing you know, she's chained you to the bed and wants signatory powers on your MasterCard.
Luke: "Hey, you've been a huge feature, probably the biggest character on my site for months...
Yes, because the part of you that loves me, REALLY loves me. For being intelligent, articulate, knowledgeable, ethical and interested in porn. For caring about you. For playing along with your need to live your life in every detail in the public spotlight. It's all very attractive to you. It's your way of paying attention to me, in the way that means most to you here and now -- involving me in your life on a daily basis in your work.
Luke: "Gotta run with the one who brung ya!"
This is a dating reference, isn't it? If a boy takes a girl to a dance, she should leave with him? I'm very slow with dating references, because I've not dated.
Here's another thought: If we were in public together, and you have mixed feelings about the "relationship," which you do, how would you interact with THEM? Take Sacramento, at the conference. How would we be perceived? As a couple? As friends? As two media professionals? Would people be talking with you and ignoring me, or vice versa, or talking to us as if we were one unit, and how would that feel? Would I expect certain behaviors of you? Or you of me? Easier to come alone and leave alone than compromise with anyone.
Uncle Stevie writes on RAME: I wonder if any legislator is willing to support them openly. You would think some of them would be reluctant to do so, especially if they're up for re-election, and they might fear that any contact with those in the adult entertainment industry can be used against them by their campaign opponents.
It reminds me of an article last year in the Sacramento Bee newspaper, when Kat Sunlove was trying to meet with some California State legislators. She explained that many of them either didn't want to meet with her or tried to cut their conversations short because they felt uncomfortable when they discovered that she was lobbying for the sex industry.
The Libertarian Party is the only political party I can think of that could probably openly endorse the Free Speech Coalition. But then, the only elected office-holders they have are in local, non-partisan offices. In the meantime, I'm just waiting to see if anyone in the sex industry (besides Cicciolina) is willing to step up and truly put their "ass on the line" --- or rather, "throw their ass in the ring" --- and actually run for office themselves.
Kat Sunlove - Is She Bright?
Fred writes: You posted a description of a Q&A session where you asked Kat Sunlove about a video in which Max Hardcore urinated on some actress. Ms. Sunlove replied that if something is over the line, the local government can ban it.
Ironically, this is what laws against pornography are all about--when jurors or a prosecutor think (in their own subjective opinion) that something is over the line (i.e. a depiction of sex or nudity), and they ban it. If Ms. Sunlove really believed the answer she gave you, how can she oppose laws against pornography?
One can tell that Ms Sunlove is not a lawyer, and has never considered the ramifications of her own thought process. Luke, how bright do you think this woman is?
On another note, Ms. L-patin quoted some nonsense from Gloria Steinem, who relies on the etymology of the words pornography and erotica to try to prove that one is bad and the other good. Come on. This is dumb. Whether something is good or bad has nothing to do with the linguistic roots of the words we use to describe it. Steinem is an ideologue, and not a clear thinker.
Ms. L-patin's quote of Justice Douglas reminded me of a story in The Brethren. It was one of the funniest things I ever read. Apparently, at one time, at the Supreme Court, every year they did a bunch of first amendment cases. These cases invariably involved watching a dirty movie to try to determine whether it had "redeeming" qualities. Justice Douglas was a first amendment purist who thought that all movies were protected by the first amendment, so he never bothered showing up. The rest of the justices would all pile into a screening room to watch the various dirty movies that were the subject of the cases they were hearing. Unfortunately, Justice Harlan was almost blind. He sat about a foot from the movie screen, but couldn't see what the heck was happening, so Thurgood Marshall would give a blow-by-blow description for Justice Harlan. Justice Marshall's commentary was invariably hilarious. (The authors of The Brethren give a funnier description of this event than I could.)
BTW, I highly recommend reading the Brethren. It gives a pretty good view about how the third branch of government works.
Luke Slipping
Henry Hady writes: Dear Mr. Luke F-rd:
I think you are slipping young man. Normally, when your personal life is not the sleaziest show in town, a rare occasion indeed, you are busy fabricating malicious gossip about someone else. Now comes an easy shot, Mayor Rudolph Giuliani, the “Community Standard” Crier of New York City and you have said ne’ery a word.
Yes indeed, Times Square at its worst has been upstaged by a new low in hypocrisy, the White Knight of Disney, Rudolph Giuliani, has been caught without his clothes. Is there any wonder why Mickey doesn’t trust him alone with Minnie Mouse? Santa Claus is no longer the only person who knows a Rudolph with a red nose!
What a conundrum for Herald Price Fahringer, noted First Amendment attorney and free speech advocate; must he now tell his clients whom are distributors of adult materials to keep the New York Times accounts of Mayor Giuliani’s adulterous affairs out of their retail establishments for fear that they will upset the delicate 40%/60% ratio of adult to non-adult materials mandated by the Giuliani Administration?
What about history? How will this alleged pursuer of “Truth, Justice and the American Way” go down in history? My guess is that we have just begun to hear about how Rudolph goes down, I expect to hear a lot more when and if his divorce goes to court.
I find it absolutely amazing that this man is running for Senator as a, be it disguised or otherwise, conservative Republican. Does he not have a sense of shame? How many people has he chastised, convicted or otherwise maligned for telling less than the truth all the while he was doing the same? How could this man, with any sense of conscience, condemn others for lying to strangers whilst he was lying to the one he allegedly most loved?
Luke Gets Mail
Low writes: I wish I could remember the comic/genius who did the bit about leaving home--making the jump---but then doing porn. Tattoos are a symbol of skank. Porno is admitting you hung around bus stations. A tattoo is like a life-long yeast infection. Some loser who did porn is destined for Liquor Store clerk-dom........forever. Luke---I dig porn. I just wonder why the folks who perform in it expect to live beyond the age of 45? these people = Carnies = sideshow freakforever. I guess I am just perplexed.
BEIJING, May 13 (Reuters) - A Chinese court has blamed a fire which killed 74 people at an illegal pornographic movie theatre on the theatre's staff, sentencing more than a dozen to jail terms, state media said on Saturday.
Lawrence writes: im curious if you have any background info on tammi ann, tara monroe and janey robbins? i also think it would be interesting if you could find out the connection between the porn world and the band the chemical people. several porn actresses were on their album covers and jack baker sang BLACK THROAT with them. i don't know if they wrote or just covered the song from the dark bros. movie. i believe the chemical people also did a benefit show for jack baker when he was mugged or something.
Chaim Amalek on Black Men With White Women
Chaim Amalek writes: Luke, check out the latest essay of William Pierce. Sad to say, black men are indeed a menace to the health of white women, and not just because of their criminal tendencies. I think his numbers regarding rates of HIV infection for black hetero males vs. whites are correct. White liberals are PLAYING WITH FIRE whenever they promote the mating of negroe men to white women.
Fortunately, Pierce and co. are not quite bright enough to figure out the very violent means by which this trend could be fought, thank God. (It is my curse that as an Eternal Jew forever on the outside looking in, I have the unique perspective by which I can know the horrible truth of what would work. I vow never to tell a soul.) But what if they should stumble on the proper strategies and tactics? All hell will break loose, and the innocent will pay. May it never come to that.
Please people (especially those of you in the media!), let's all do our part to verbally reestablish the boundaries between white and black, so that each can live in peace. Let's make miscegenation as unacceptable among good people as driving while drunk or smoking on elevators.
Oy, Who Wants To Be A Jewish Millionaire?
$100
Which of these names is least likely to be found at temple?
A. Cohen
B. Rosenberg
C. Schwartz
D. Christensen
$200
The term "Bloomies" refers to
A. Underpants
B. A wonderful store
C. Flowers
D. The British
$300
The person your therapist is most likely to hear about is
A. Your boss
B. Your roommate
C. Your mother
D. Your dog
$400
How many Jewish mothers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A. One
B. Four
C. Three
D. None, I'll just sit here in the dark.
$500
The most disturbing thing about the TV show "Friends" is
A. Monica needs a meal
B. Rachel needs a haircut
C. Joey needs a brain
D. Ross and Monica are siblings, but Monica is so obviously gentile
and Ross is so obviously Jewish.
$1,000
You should call your mother
A. Every single day
B. Weekly
C. Monthly
D. Annually $2,000
Your son will least likely be
A. A doctor
B. A lawyer
C. A fireman
D. A rabbi
$4,000 Houserobe is to Slippers as Little Black Dress is to
A. Heels
B. Sandals
C. Sneakers
D. A Nice Pair of Prada Slides
$8,000
Murphy Brown's producer was
A. Miles Silverberg
B. Simon Goldenstein
C. Brian Rosengold
D. David Bergsteiner
$16,000
Which of the following comedians is not Jewish but could be?
A. Jon Stewart
B. Billy Crystal
C. Robin Williams
D. Ben Stiller
$32,000
Fill in the blank: During the summer, I go _____ the shore.
A. Up
B. To
C. See
D. Down
$50,000
What popular game is played by many Jewish college students?
A. Chutzpah and Ladders
B. Pin the Tallis on the Rabbi
C. Go Gefilte Fish
D. Jewish Geography
$100,000
Which of the following is not a traditional bagel variety?
A. Poppy
B. Sesame
C. Onion
D. Asiago Cheese
$250,000 Which food is least likely to appear in a Jewish Deli?
A. A Knish
B. Matzoh Ball Soup
C. Corned Beef on Rye
D. Beef Wellington
$500,000 When preparing a meal for a family of five, the actual number of people you should prepare food for is:
A. 5
B. 6
C. 8
D. The population of Long Island.
$1,000,000
What celebrity told Oprah her favorite present was a mezuzah she got from her grandmother?
A. Sally Field
B. Gwyneth Paltrow
C. Cameron Diaz
D. Angelina Jolie
ARE THESE YOUR FINAL ANSWERS? CHECK THEM AGAINST THE ANSWER KEY BELOW. $100 = D $200 = B $300 = C $400 = D $500 = D $1,000 = A $2,000 = C $4,000 = D $8,000 = A $16,000 = C $32,000 = D $50,000 = D $100,000 = D $250, 000 = D $500,000 = D $1,000,000 = B
PornStarTrading.com
zaney> luke we should kick it once, ill bring some persian pussy
l-keford1> i find sex outside of a meaningfull relationship, zaney, to be superficial and ultimately not in accord with God's will.
MikeSouth> Luke if God (ie mother nature) had not meant for us to f--- she wouldnt have made it feel so good
l-keford1> have you guys ever considered that you might be addicted to sports and that this is substituting for meaninful relationships in your lives?
l-keford1> have you guys ever considered that you might be addicted to porn and that this is substituting for meaninful relationships in your lives?
MikeSouth> rasslin a substitute for a meaningful relationship
l-keford1> have you guys ever considered that you might be addicted to MIRC and that this is substituting for meaninful relationships in your lives?
Jim_Gunn> Luke as our resident moralist, I wonder what Luke thinks of napster in relation to the record companies and some musicians position that napster and/OR it's end users are infringing on their intelletcual property rights to control the distribution of their music?
l-keford1> I'm torn Jim, but I side more with you than your opponents.
Jim_Gunn> I keep seeing these brats writing online about how Metallica is greedy and the cd's cost too much and how they are turning on their fans- this buncha f---in' pissant losers makes me ill.
MikeSouth> I have dated a lot of jewish chicks and every one of them
loved anal sex