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Friday, April 7, 2000

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Luke F-rd Center For Ethical Monotheism

I've finally decided what I want to do with my life when I grow up - found the non-profit Luke F-rd Center For Ethical Monotheism. We will study popular culture through the prism of Mount Sinai.

Please submit original essays of general interest dealing with matters covered on this site, but from the perspective of the Torah (five books of Moses). For example, one could write under the title of "An Ethical Monotheist Looks At Traci Lords" or "Rough Sex 2 And Maniacal Ethicism." Or, "A Torah View of Miscegenation."

I've just finished reading Jane Austen's novel "Mansfield Park," and I've come to the conclusion that Austen was an ethical monotheist (one who believes that there is one God, creator of the universe, whose primary demand of humanity is ethical behavior). What we really need on this site is more writing in the style of Jane Austen and Victorian Moralism but applied to the pressing issues of modern porn.

Today I am staying with a Christian friend who grew up with my brother and sister. About ten years ago, he came out of the closet. He soon was fired from his church's hospital and essentially left the church. In the bathroom are a variety of nice laid out mens health magazines, with covers of buffed handsome men. On the refrigerator are various photos of barely dressed hunks, a condom and the following message: "Health + Pride + Style + Life + Diversity = Happy Gay Lifestyle." How should an ethical monotheist (a follower of the philosophy founded by Dennis Prager), rooted in the Bible, respond?

Bryn Pryor Busted

I hear that former managing editor of Adult Video News, Bryn Pror aka Mark Logan, is in trouble with the law. He resigned his AVN post a few months ago, to direct a mainstream movie written by several AVN staffers and funded by AVN publisher Paul Fishbein.

Rocco With She-Males

Voyager7 writes on RAME: I have stumbled upon a pic of our swirlie-Rame-poster-boy Rocco on all fours, with a she-male in boots, her foot resting on his back, her middle leg at attention. A blond-big-haired coned female(?) is aside her, leg is also resting on his back, her hand has a yank of his hair. He looks like he could use a swirlie.... Anyone know if this is from a video, or just a naughty photo shoot? I know in Rocco's Whipped Cream, he had a she-male towards the end, who did a scene with a genetic female, but I know of no other Rocco-meets-the-wild-side videos.

Andy Lace Demise

Andy Lace writes: Hello there Its been a while and I have a few things to talk about. As some of you may know I have signed a deal which will finally give me the opportunity to achieve my goals. I will in about six weeks be on cable and on regular network television twice a week. It looks like finally after doing the "hollywood thing so long" my fifteen minutes of fame is finally here.

Part of my new deal is I can no longer be in the Adult industry and the Andy Lace persona must be dropped so this will happen by April 15. My club and my website will be shut down. My new company will take over all my PR using my real Name Brooke Senay. yes that is my name and I hope that you will be hearing it a lot over the next year.

I did start a new Yahoo club So please go ahead and join It http://clubs.yahoo.com/clubs/brookesenay

I want to thank all you who believed in me in the adult business and as I leave that behind and go on to other things thank you. But now as They say I you will coming at you on the TV soon right there In your homes and it is going to be fun, crazy and exciting. I think all of you will love my new gig. Make sure to join my new club because I will announce on it my first televised appearance Date as soon as I can. OH and my hair will be Blonde. (Very Sexy)

Kendra Jade Shoot

Papa Razzi writes: Hello Luke. Here's an interesting tidbit: I happened to be at the www.realpornworld.com house yesterday and guess who was being shot? Kendra Jade. But guess what else? She wasn't shooting for BO of LGI (John Kenney). She was shooting for Gentlemen's Video (Mike Esposito). Now ordinarily, a porn star being shot in a porn video is not unusual. But in this case, given my recollection of recent events regarding the ongoing dispute between Ms. Jade and Mr. Kenney, it seems that Ms. Jade has violated Mr. Kenney's many warnings regarding shooting for others while she is still under contract to LGI. Is Ms. Jade still under contract to LGI? Did they resolve their differences without public release of that information? Inquiring minds want to know. If, however, Ms. Jade is still under contract to LGI, it will be most interesting to watch and see if Mr. Kenney makes good on his public promises to sue both Ms. Jade and/or any company who does not heed his warnings and shoots her in a video.

Brandy Blows Luke

BrandyAlx1: For the record, I do not want you all to myself. Not sure I even want you at all except to give you a vicarious thrill.

BrandyAlx1: But then you have access to porn stars, so a blowjob from me would hardly be an experience you remember and retell fondly for the rest of your life. ;)

Price Hansen

Dirk writes: Prior to IA2000 did anyone pay attention to the PrimeXTC website...especially before December? He was so brilliant as to claim that he already had over 13 websites up and running when he had nothing. Duh! Did you know they were supposed to be live with dozens more by January? Maybe he isn't as rich as he claims to be or he's clueless - or both (why isn't Hancoent.com - the home site of Hanco Entertainment not accessable by the way? Isn't that stupid thing to do? Anyone with any business or internet sense would never have their corporate site down or inaccessable to potential clients).

Let's Teach Tolerance

Chaim Amalek writes: Please, english only on your web site. It is bad enough that more and more people from south of the border are moving here illegally (bad enough that they come here legally!); must we have our noses rubbed in it even on l-keford.com, and by a jewess no less?

By the way, exactly what have the teeming millions of spanish speaking people of Cuba, Puerto Rico, Mexico and the world south of the Rio Grande ever contributed to science, mathematics, technology, or philosophy? Also, judging from the disparity between the skin tones in evidence on spanish language television and the skin tones that actually characterize hispanic people, they seem to be an especially racist lot. (And I have not even mentioned all those racist "white" Cubans in Florida.) We do not need their kind in liberal North America.

PS While I am on the subject of race, whoever dreamt of that XXXGen magazine cover with the large black man covering the breasts of an attractive blonde white woman with his mitts is an imbecile. Any suggestion of black dominance over or possession of the white man's woman is, to be blunt, the very last thing the true target audience of men who sustain the porn business want to see. (Which explains 99% of what you need to know about the issue of race in porn.) They would have sold more copies with a lead story "debunking the myth" of the large Negro penis. - Luke F-rd

Tolerance - It is Worth Reaching For (Please support the Southern Poverty Law Center. Send checks to 400 Washington Avenue, Montgomery, AL 36104. They provide gainful employment to lots of nice short jewish lawyers fighting hate and intolerant thoughts who would otherwise be suing you for something.)

Luke Gets Mail

Kevin Blatt writes: Just wanted to let you know that the episode of Houston talking about her labia surgery is on tonight's E Channel show! It's a two-parter, no pun intended! Tune in and find out more about what Houston is doing to HER private parts or go to www.karasxxx.com for more details. On a side note, thanks again for all of your exposure after my resignation from YNOT. I received a myriad of offers and will be announcing after the Houston Surgery where I am going, I can't wait to tell the world!

Goddess writes: Chaim is surely the voice of wisdom, Luke, but you might want to consider getting a life before you slap that video camera in your apartment 24/7. Personally, I think ebay is the right way for you to go. I'm sure there are TONS of guys who would love to f--- you in the ass:) (Pssst: bring 'em back to your apartment, so we can watch 'em give ya the big one.)

Chaim Amalek writes: Luke, you gotta try something new in addition or in place of what you have been doing. All of my comments may seem to have been said in jest, but they are valid nonetheless. You are in your mid thirties and getting older EVERY DAY. The speed of time is accelerating, Luke. If you are not careful, you will end up a forty five year old FAN BOY who follows Miss Popular X around, working as her personal assistant (no sex for you!) in exchange for a place to crash on her garage floor.

Lynne Amalek, Chaim's cousin, writes Luke: Last night I dreamed....you (played by some cute guy with a beard) had published a tabloid about having had sex with animals, chickens, I think. My husband (played by a clean shaven blonde type) was appalled and found it disgusting. The two of you had sex while we all watched a movie in which you starred. You both left, separately. My husband conceded that maybe you were okay. I considered watching the movie again.

Chaim Amalek writes: Upon further reflection, I wish to recant the somewhat disparaging remarks I made regarding people from south of the rio grande. Since these mestizos (or is it maztos, I always get the two confused) have existed as a distinct racial grouping (if they are that) for only a measly half of a millennium, perhaps it is unfair to expect them to have made any serious contribution to science or technology by now. After all, white folks have been around for many thousands of years (asians too). On the other hand, their Mayan ancestors did have a pretty cool calender. And anyway, without them, who would wash our floors, pick our produce, or pluck our chickens? Please forgive me. (Think that will work for you with Christy?)

By the way, how will you be celebrating the indiscriminate slaughter of the first born sons of Egypt this year (Passover)? In Australia, among Christians who love you, or here with jews who have rejected you? Shabbat Shalom!

PS "Goddess" is beginning to understand Lord Fuke. She will be one of my acolytes.

Luke: With Jews in Los Angeles who have rejected me. BTW Chaim, can you tell me if LA Bust and Dakota Kelly are real or augmented?