October 31, 2009, 5:03 PM
Porn Director Ivan has a great Time with Megan Fox?
Comedy by Ivan of IAmIvan.com
Yes you heard it here first. So here is the story. My friends invited me to a Haunted Hayride in the Valley. I have been shooting and editing none stop for weeks. This was a perfect opportunity for me to take a few hours off to enjoy the fruits of my labor. I guess, I really need a week off and a massage to actually get my work’s worth. But this was going to have to do for the meantime. I never even heard of this type of event but was beyond curious. My HD camera with nightshot was not charged so I grabbed my other one. Hoping to at least record some fun audio on the ride.
As we stood in line weird creatures approached, trying to scare or screw with us. It seemed hokey at first but when we got on the actual wagon being pulled by the bulldozer it seemed as if this might be interesting. They warned us not to touch the people and they won’t touch us, no flash photography and no VIDEO! Um, ok … um, no. I figured I’ll keep recording on the DL. Once we began moving I looked around to check out my neighbors in this possible death machine. This felt like a beginning to a bad horror movie. But then I spotted him.
I thought to myself … “wait isn’t that the kid from Dance Party USA? No wait that’s David Silver from my favorite show Beverly Hills 90210! and now from Smallville!” What the snap?! I was a bit star struck but then was thinking, hey wait. I was one MTV for like 97 seconds … F him! We are peers! Then I see this chick hugging up on him. And a thought crossed my mind, “Isn’t that Megan Fox?” Isn’t David, I mean Brian (as peers like me would call him) dating Megan Fox? While pondering this, I remembered that at one point in his career Brian Green was a rapper and his album was called “One Stop Carnival”? Dang, as I reminisced our people mover entered the Carnival area. Now I was spooked! Too many coincidences! We had Mr. Green, his song and now the Carnival! Yup this was a beginning to a real life Final Destination gory crapfest on celluloid minus the celluloid plus the silicone.
As I panicked on the inside, my mind was laid to rest with a simple nudge on my knee. Brian’s girl’s ass’s butt cheeks were all over my knee. As the clowns ran towards our wagon, the hiney kept bouncing on my knee. Not just a Hiney! Megan Fox’s hiney! I tried to pull back but was stuck up against the wagon wall. While the clowns screamed, the gyrations on my knee picked up. I wondered was this an accident, was she simply freaked by the clowns or is she making a move? I figured she is a legendary film actress and definitely knows when and where her butt cheeks always are. So in my mind this was no accident but a simple, “hey you, whats’ up?” And all in front of her boyfriend?! Dang! I think at one point those gyrations became more of what seemed to be Morse Code! Now I am thinking, “dude what number is dot dot line?” I wish I would have learned Morse Code is all that went through my mind.
After the ride we all jumped off our people mover, hearts pounding from an amazing ride. I think at one point I heard Megan say to Brian, “Hey I think that’s Ivan from MTV’s True Life?”
The ride was fun, I did video tape the entire ride. It was pretty dark so my video footage is dark but with clear audio. And I did catch a glimpse of the lovely couple cuddling as her butt made it’s move on my knee. She wore a black and white hat while he wore a baseball cap. Me too! I guess all of us big time celebrities do have a lot in common.
So this is my story of my night with Megan Fox and Brian Austin Green. I guess this is more a story of how her butt cheeks and a little crack made a move on my left knee. I wonder if that night those butt cheeks touched his knee? Hhhmmm.
I WISH I KNEW MORSE CODE!
NL- Is this story for real?
Ivan- LOL it’s all true. Well maybe embellished a little or maybe not! 
NL- Ivan directed one of my favorite movies, perfect to watch on Halloween- Dawn of the Head
That’s great!!
October 31st, 2009 at 5:49 pYeah it was, what a slut. lol
November 3rd, 2009 at 2:58 p