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March 9, 2013, 11:37 PM

Soldier’s looking for a date with Jazmine Byrne…

 

Dear Mr. Luke,

      I understand you are a busy man so i will ask this promptly. I understand you have the ability to contact many adult film actresses. I have been trying to find Some sort of contact to Ms. Jazmine Byrne. Ive been looking for a mailing address or a e-mail. But to no avail.You see. I am a Soldier. Im stationed at Fort Drum,New York, and its very dismal up here. I’m Originally from Fl and I don’t know many people up here, and this place is just a different culture shock for me.

 

In the Army we have " Military Balls", Pretty much a "dance " like what we go to in high school. Your supposed to bring your wives, girlfriends, and whatnot. None of which I have.I’m not a horny little 18 year old who thinks it would be cool to "bring a porn star to the prom". No, I’m a 25 year old, who’s been in the army for a while, And would like to try to fill a void in my life, and would like to experience something i would never be able to normally do.
 
If there is someway you can help me, or pass a word along.I would be greatly indebted.
   Thank you for your time ,Sir

                                   SPC, Umile, Frank

This entry was posted on Saturday, March 9th, 2013 at 11:37 p and is filed under 2013, exclusive, mainstream. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

17 Responses to “Soldier’s looking for a date with Jazmine Byrne…”

  1. moxie2 Says:

    If the guy can’t figure out that “Mr. Luke” is named Cyndi, then it is not surprising he Can’t locate a porn star. He could save himself a lot of trouble and just call one of the Earest escort agencies and pay someone to be his date.

    March 10th, 2013 at 5:51 p
  2. ceth86 Says:

    About 6 or 7 years ago, while I was still at college, Jasmine Byrne was pretty much my ideal woman (looks-wise, at least). Total blast from the past!

    I have a feeling she’s long-gone from the biz, though.

    March 10th, 2013 at 6:14 p
  3. jeremysteele11 Says:

    He’s not a little 18 year old trying to bring a porn star to the prom… he’s a 25 year old trying to date a porn star to fill a void. Glad he’s grown up so much in 7 years.

    The last time I saw Ms. Bryne was at Eddie Van Halen’s house for his Sacred Sin release party in 2006. She wasn’t too friendly, but hey, that scene I did with her and Billy Glide, my first ever for Mr. Ryder, was the only time I ever got limp in the middle of a scene for him. It was just a bad day I was having, had nothing to do with her, as I thought she was hot. Sometimes girls don’t understand that, and take it personally. Oh well. At least I had a good several years run for Mr. Ryder after that. Props that not everyone will give up on you for all eternity for one bad scene. Strangely Hustler has comped that scene like crazy!

    March 10th, 2013 at 1:49 p
  4. rsx Says:

    And here I was thinking my problems were bad, must be a boring job working for the government. Consider one’s priorities if the best if you can hope for is a dance with some woman who has appeared in over 300 movies..She’s long gone, and I don’t see why he’s playing the military card in an attempt to establish credibility – any bonehead who isn’t missing appendages and has both of their balls in one sack can sign up.

    @Jeremy: Haha, Billy Glide is a worm. We spoke a few times and he wouldnt stop rambling about what a good lay he is and how he spends all of his free time lifting weights. What a meathead, admitted he has zero female friends..They’re all like that in Huntington Beach, garbage in garbage out. These days he’s a rent-a-cop and doesn’t even see his kid.

    March 10th, 2013 at 1:52 p
  5. jeremysteele11 Says:

    “Military men are dumb, stupid animals to be used as pawns for foreign policy.” said long time presidential puppet handler (aka “advisor”) Henry Kissinger to Alexander Haig, newly appointed White House chief of staff, in 1973, as revealed in the book “The Final Days”, Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein.

    In spite of this revelation by one of the veteran members of the illuminazis, those who deliberately create all kinds of never-ending wars for profit and power, military men (and women) keep signing up. But considering how the illuminazis also fuck up the economy and give poor people few options and an abysmal education, go figure.

    As for Billy Glide, Rsx, he was a nice guy to me.

    March 10th, 2013 at 2:02 p
  6. Will Ryder Says:

    Our military deserves the finest pussy money can buy. Jeremy, contact me I have a really interesting role for you in a movie I might produce. I am totally serious. I no longer have a valid cell on you.

    March 10th, 2013 at 3:19 p
  7. jeremysteele11 Says:

    Ok, I think I deleted yours. I will send it to Cindi and expect she’ll forward it to you.

    March 10th, 2013 at 4:41 p
  8. goatlord Says:

    At first I thought Jazmine would easily do this if she got paid. Then I remembered porn girls who swallow dicks that come out of someones asshole and do all types of crazy, sick acts…..but they wont kiss a guy….its too intimate!

    Maybe going to the ball and dancing, holding each other, and talking would be too intimate for Jazmine. She would be more comfortable unzipping his pants and sucking cock and balls. She would rather sit on his face then talk to him face to face.

    Ok, heres the plan:

    -find out what agency Jazmine is with, explain the situation, and get a price
    -go to kickstarter or a simliar site and get donations from the public

    March 10th, 2013 at 5:59 p
  9. bonerman Says:

    last I heard she was living with some drug dealer up in Oregon and escorting. she was a firece little creature on camera that’s for sure! a great unsung performer.

    Notice Jeremy just had to get his anti government rant in there.

    March 11th, 2013 at 4:41 p
  10. Larry Horse Says:

    Couldnt some other porn girl and step up and help this soldier, lots of girls tour up in NYC and maybe one could go with him.

    March 11th, 2013 at 12:33 p
  11. jeremysteele11 Says:

    did u know bonerman that “government” literally means mind control?… govern means control and ment means mind… hidden in plain sight because they figure u wont notice anyway… or if u do that nothing will come of it at least… so govt of the people means mind control of the people… im only here to annoy u, so pay no attn to me.

    March 11th, 2013 at 12:47 p
  12. origen Says:

    This guy needs to stop watching porn and grow up. Seriously. Jazmin probably has more problems than he does. What a stupid fantasy and he should be old enough to realize that.

    March 11th, 2013 at 1:46 p
  13. jeremysteele11 Says:

    gee cindi, did the g-word (gubberment) put my last post on mod or whut? im gonna have to start messin with words to keep my speech off the leash…. n e ways… sounds like ms. byrne n company should have a camera crew up there… would prolly make a good documentary!

    March 11th, 2013 at 2:18 p
  14. Karmafan Says:

    Musta been all that Illuminati talk Jeremy. You gotta remember to stay on the topic and keep your conspiracy stuff for the scifi/fantasy boards.

    March 11th, 2013 at 3:56 p
  15. jeremysteele11 Says:

    its not a fantasy but a nightmare…. i havent yet figured out yet that a lack of investigation makes one an expert on matters.

    March 11th, 2013 at 5:01 p
  16. origen Says:

    Why can’t this guy find a normal, nice woman to take out on a date? Has he been watching too much porn? He has to cut that out or it would destroy his life. It’s not hard to take a woman on a nice date. Girls just want to have fun…

    March 11th, 2013 at 5:44 p
  17. jeremysteele11 Says:

    “I’m not some little 18 old kid trying to take a porn star to the prom… I’m a 25 year old wanting Jazmine Byrne to experience my weapon of ass destruction!”

    March 11th, 2013 at 11:22 p

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